Dinner hangout 😁
By - StrongSaxophone
Hahahaha (sadness) alright
ahahhahha (pain) alright
Hahahaha (disappointment) alright
She cycled through nearly ever emotion in the space of six texts. I can almost hear the sigh of relief in that final emoji.
It all fell apart when the fire nation attacked!
By your powers combined, I am Captain Plan-
Awww fuck, wrong again.
Only the Avatar
Master of all four elements
Could stop them
But when the world needed him most
100 years passed
And my brother and I discovered a new Avatar
An airbender named Aang
And although his air bending skills are great
He has a lot to learn
Before he’s ready to save anyone...
But I believe
Aang can save the world
Duhhhhhhh duh duh duhhhh
Star wars saga :|
Why not just bail at that point, it's so bizarre.
Probably because these are always fake.
One can hope
Black holes exist. I expect the equivalent exists for cringe.
Yea honestly lol , I’d be like welp looks like I’m having pbj and watching Harry Potter tonight.. again ..alone😭
My mans didn’t act a fool tho, needs to read signals better, but took it on the chin!
I think the best thing to do at the moment is to come clear with your intentions. If it isn't going to happen, it isn't going to happen. Call it off instead of crushing your self like this.
Right, "Hahahaha alright" was such a mask.
The oof I felt reading that made my thumbs tingle with sad :(
"Oh damn so it's not a date? That sucks. Thought it was. Oh well either, way. Enjoy the hangout with your friend and have a good one."
I mean yeah. If she isnt interested dont endure the hangout HOPING you'll get lucky.
Yep, forget dinner and put the whole thing behind you. Gotta know when to call it.
Know when to fold em
Most of the texts pm this sub would be resolved if the receivers had enough balls to do this.
Good for you buddy!
I mean if I liked them enough to want to go on a date with them I’d be fine just hanging out with them and a few friends
But if what you want is more than friendship, settling for friendship isn't necessarily a good choice. For some people it can be but for most it'll just hurt more.
I have never regretted having friends. And now that I’m older I wish I had more.
There are plenty of places to get friends, you don't need to make friends with everyone you talk to.
Rifht, but obviously this person was looking for something more.
Going to dinner with someone one time is not settling for friendship
What is it then? What's the purpose if you know they don't want what you want and it's likely going to be an uncomfortable situation with their friend?
You could make potentially two new friends? Just because you were initially interested in seeing if there could be a romantic relationship doesn't mean you can't seek another type of positive and fullfilling relationship from the same person.
That's technically true, but most people would not be interested in that, because romantic feelings don't just disappear and it's not a pleasant experience to have up suppress them when you're around someone.
Typically if I'm interested in someone I'll try to make my intentions clear as soon as I can, that way if they don't reciprocate I can move on pretty quickly since I'm not as invested and I can keep them as a friend with no lingering feels. Two of my best female friends were made this way, now they give me dating advice.
The idea here is that Grey (texter on left) still likely wants to be friends with Blue based on the fact that they didn't flat out call off the dinner hangout. If blue values their friendship beyond "wants to bang" then a dinner hangout should still be something worth attending and even enjoying.
You know theres a difference between banging and dating right?
damn.. ive been dating wrong all this time
I've been getting banged wrong
If you teach me how to date right, I’ll teach you how to bang right
Can’t imagine getting advice on how to bang on Reddit
You’re right. These lessons would need to be in person
For sure going to also get downvoted but just want to add an experience, have had a hangout planned with a close male friend before which became a "date" retroactively (I cancelled), felt a bit sneaky
Hahaha you realize you're basically saying, wants to go on a date = "wants to bang" in your mind. Friends are cool, but blue clearly wants to go on a date with grey and not just hangout as friends, so why pretend otherwise?
I mean... as a general rule, most adults have sex when they date. Maybe not on the first date, but unless you're ace or religious, sex is a part of dating. If you don't reciprocate someone's feelings, knowing they want to date you is also knowing they want to bang you, both of which are uncomfortable.
If you like someone enough to date them you like them enough to be friends with them
Both self-respect and respect for others involves being clear about one's feelings and intentions. Sometimes the thing that is both self-respecting and respectful of the other person in situations involving unreciprocated romantic feelings is to cut contact. That may seem harsh but it's the truth more often than not.
I’ve tried approaching potential relationships from all sorts of angles in my life and found that’s it’s best to just make your intentions clear from the start if you’re looking for a romantic partner and not just another friend.
You also don’t have to be friends with someone if that’s all they see you as. But be mature about it and never resort to “nice guy rage” after getting shot down.
That is a maturity level that an awful lot of people just do not possess.
The ability to accept that a person does not reciprocate your romantic/physical attraction to that person and to be able to set that aside and remain ***TRUE*** friends (not just waiting in the wings for a *chance*) is very rare.
More often than not, trying to do so is setting yourself up for failure. better to cut the tie altogether, or remain as contacts, but not really friends.
In time when the rawness fades, a true friendship may develop. immediately after being rejected? nope. especially if the parties are young.
Right, but the point is he doesn't want to be friends he wants to date and is settling for friends.
Are you in r/femaledatingstrategy by any chance?
Wow what in the actual fuck
Nah, just been Grey a few too many times and thought I could share an alternate perspective. Jokes on me!
I think the point of the first comment is that staying friends and doing friend stuff would be crushing to blue, and it’s better to come clean with their intentions than to do that to themselves.
I mean, it's pretty obvious that blue wants to date and gray doesn't. Blue can either stay friends and understand that there is no path to a relationship, or they can just move on.
But… you understand that Grey is also not entitled to Blue’s friendship, right? Grey isn’t obligated to date Blue, but if Blue’s primary interest is dating Grey, they have a right to state their intentions and let the chips fall where they may. Maybe they’ll end up just friends, or maybe they won’t.
Blue also needs to be clear about their intentions. If they don’t want to date Blue they need to say that instead of coercing Blue into pretending to have different intentions.
This seems reasonable why are you being downvoted?
I'm seeing there's a confusion in the context of these texts, are they friends already or acquaintances who one wants to be friends and the other wants something more?
If we assume they were already friends and blue wants something more, then this is perfectly fine. Blue shot their shot, gray turned them down in a mostly ok way, everyone saves face. Blue just needs to be mature enough to leave it at that and not try to force the issue.
The fact is we need more context, I'm getting downvoted elsewhere because I assumed they weren't already friends and blue is just settling. Which if that's the case, they should be upfront about what they wanted and if they're not comfortable with just being friends not putting themselves into that situation just to save face.
Ummmmm why is this so downvoted?
My guess, wording or that to a lot of people staying friends with someone you’re really attracted to and want to date is painful.
Oh my GOD, why is this being downvoted??
because someone isn’t obligated to stay in a friendly relationship with someone they want something more with. and because they seem to think blue just wants to fuck and that’s it
this does hurt, it kinda looks like the other person started to panic
"Kinda"? This is full blown "this person is FLIRTING WITH ME and I didn't notice until now" socially awkward terror.
It's literally the Anakin meme but in text message form lol
anakin: we’re going on a dinner date
padme: dinner date?? you mean with friends right
padme: .... you mean with friends ... right?
I feel bad for both parties tbh, unfortunate miscommunication
Tbf I have done this with people I genuinely liked. I BEGGED my friend to come with me on my first date with my last partner because I was nervous... I thought he was out of my league and jusr wanted to be friends. She rolled her eyes and flat out refused despite me insisting it wasn't a date.
We've now been dating for 11 years
At this point just be honest with it, “Hey I actually wanted this to be a date but if you’re uncomfortable with that we don’t have to go anymore,” or something along those lines
I wish i had the guts to say that, when I was younger, in some occasions. Thus i can feel this guys' pain
It honestly is for the better to say it upfront. Showing up for drinks to find she invited a friend without telling me was more frustrating than if she had just told me she didn't want drinks like that. Which would have been fine. But getting surprised by that was not fun.
You're right, but a lot of us have all gone through similar situations at some point and it often takes experiencing it to learn. I made the mistake of not making my wishes clear once once that was all it took for me to never make that mistake again.
It's a situation where those that know to be clear don't need to be told and those that don't know to be clear likely are more worried about rejection and think getting rejected is worse than anything else that could happen.
I mean it's pretty obvious just based on these texts that gray isn't comfortable with dating. Like there is no chance they didn't already figure out the intention here and if they were interested in any way they definitely wouldn't respond like this. Gray is just trying to reject them in a round about way. Asking about it is just gonna make it awkward and make you look clueless.
Hahahaha, alright. Nevermind then.
They should have said that.
I would have just sent the I don’t want to play with you anymore toy story 2 gif and try to plow her dad
Plowing her dad is such an obvious move though.
Plow her dog - no one expects that.
Because that's a bit more emotionally honest about their intentions and desires.
This physically hurt me
At that point I ain’t even going
Not sure what teenage me wouldve done, but adult me wouldnt waste the time. One of us misread the situation, have fun with those friends.
Right? It isn’t worth going anymore
I've seen this so many times now and still cringe at it.
This is about the time you hit them with "Ayyy i gotta cancel plans, thought it was just you and I, dont really want to chill with a group of people."
So much pain in that "haha"
Oh man this really hurts to read…
"hahahhahaheueheuheu.......snifff" breaks down into sobbing
\*Inserts that angry face with happy face mask gif
fuck it at that point
You can feel the utter defeat in that last message. Just to be happy for probably quite a while before the date, when they first made plans, then to find out absolutely nothing that they thought it was was true.
Idk it see a like they took it pretty well all things considered. Kind of a neutral response, it's honestly more sad for the person freaking out imo
Yeah, true. I wouldn't call blue's response sad cringe at all considering all the other responses they could have had. It may have seemed soul crushing for them but perhaps they handled it better than others.
I agree with you 🤝
It's the fourth "ha" for me
Even if she didn't really understand and though other people were coming, who the fuck invites other people without telling the other group if they are fine with it?
*Image Transcription: Text Messages*
**Right**: Hype for our dinner date
>**Left**: Dinner date?
>**Left**: Aren't we inviting other people
>**Left**: We're inviting other people right
>**Left**: Just texted my friend she's coming too
>**Left**: Invite someone you know
>**Left**: Dinner hangout 😁
**Right**: Hahahaha alright
^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
*gives u water bottle* i would die without you
“I’m sorry, I think we have different expectations of what this is. I was looking forward to a dinner date, but if you don’t feel the same way, I understand. I just want us to be clear with what we want so we can save ourselves the time and understanding.”
Why tf would you do this? just say "i dont wanna go in a date with you", the world is not gonna end
Maybe it wasn't clear it was planned as a date, either way I think it's fine. They made their intentions pretty clear.
Making their intentions clear would have been clearly stating that they aren’t interested in dating.
This is a classic example of the difference between niceness and kindness. This person thinks they’re being nice by ignoring the fact that the other person clearly wants to be more than friends. The kind thing to do would be to clear the air and give them space to beside if they can continue to be just friends despite having feelings for them. The second scenario *might* end with a lost friendship, but the first one *will* end badly because no one like to feel like they have to hide their true feelings around their friends.
I don't think this was a matter of niceness/kindness. There was obviously a misunderstanding, so I don't hold it against the girl for panicking.
The guy should have cleared the air and actually state his intentions free from ambiguity now that she knows what's up. Only then can he expect a direct response. Anything outside of "okay it's a date then" or its equivalents is a direct rejection.
"I was hoping it was going to be just the two of us."
"Wait so I'm not going out on a date with you like I hoped?"
"No it's not a group thing."
"Who brings friends on a date?"
Idunno something like that.
Call it ripping the bandaid off or whatever but that’s one of those things you just learn as you get older. It’s not worth dragging your self through broken glass for something you don’t want. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with saying “I think we’re looking for different things”
In most of these cases that has already been said. I'm not trying to make my own narrative to this conversation, but a lot of times the lady has said in no uncertain terms there is no interest. The guy takes this as a challenge to win her over, not understanding she doesn't want to be won over, she just doesn't like you like that.
Sucks, but thats life.
I've said almost this same exchange, and repsosed with separate checks right lol? Ghosted after that.
Dude just type nevermind at that point, no reason to go to a dinner hangout when you wanted a date
Isn’t this a repost..?
This has been reposted a lot
If I was blue, I would most definitely not go! That was a super awkward interaction.
Isn't it funny how everyone just assumes the person who is hyped for "dinner date" is male and the panicked person responding is female? Even though it wasn't implied in any way in the entire post?
we live in a society
Since the panicked person invited a female friend, it's probably a safe bet that they're also female. Not a guarantee, but I wouldn't sayit wasn't implied in any way.
the op of the comment is virtue signaling 🙄🙄🙄🙄
Because that is how it goes 90% of the time. You can call it sexism or you can call it real life.
I called it for what it is. Funny.
Except you didn’t really mean it was funny in a humorous way, but ya
Well ill call it racism then!
Bc 75% of the time that’s the case
Edit: now that I think of it, I have never seen a guy pull shit like that.
Only 75%? More like 95%.
...that’s so interesting.
Yikes I would just not respond to them after reading that. Fuck.
Clearly fake. If she thought they were inviting other people, why had she not already done so before the ”hype” message?
when your intended replaces date with "hangout", don't waste your time, they don't want to fuck you
Guessing by her quick texts she begged her friend to come along as not to be alone with him.
His text also seems somewhat neutral instead of being more assertive.
When you actually express your excitement for something but it instantly bites you in the butt
The real sad cringe is the amount of times this has been reposted
Why on earth would that man go after she said it wasnt a date? some of these dudes need to start growing backbones man.
It’s hard to grow a backbone when this is pretty much the current dating climate. Half the time you either get nothing or take what you can get.
In your opinion, what do you feel is the current dating climate?
Women are inundated with literally millions of requests for sex from the entire spectrum of men.
Men's relationship life is decided solely on how much more "effort" they're willing to put towards presenting themselves as suitable partners.
Notice affection and other emotions don't play into this.
That's only if you never socialise or meet new people.
If you're trying to meet girls for the sole purpose to date them then obviously you're putting yourself in a position where you're going to be compared to all the other guys doing that. It becomes a competition, because all you can really present about yourself on a dating profile is how you look and some surface level information.
If you meet people through social events, friends etc. and actually have conversations with them and get to know them, emotions play a much bigger part.
That is such horse shit. Your experiences and skewed perspective absolutely do not represent either gender as a whole.
This part might suck to hear, but you are absolutely not entitled to be in a relationship.
I never said I was? This is what I've observed.
Nobody is entitled to anything.
If people want to spend their time with you, so be it, if they don't, that's none of your businesses.
But my personal beliefs have nothing to do with the reality of the modern dating scene.
Honestly I don’t know exactly how to answer that. I think nowdays a lot of guys are pretty desperate and probably feel defeated because of the disparity between the amount of effort guys put into finding a girl and the amount of rejections that dudes face. I don’t really have a woman’s POV when it comes to dating but from a dudes perspective or seems like dating gets very demoralizing after a while.
Rejection in any aspect sucks no question and, agreed, repeated rejection can absolutely be demoralizing. But adopting the stance of taking what you can get only makes it exponentially worse.
Yeah I tend to agree, though it’s hard not to feel that way
Don’t make your life just about finding someone. You’re also generalizing what you’re going through to a majority of men. Being turned down is part of putting yourself out there. Believe it or not women get turned down too. If you’re not ready for rejection you may not be ready for dating at all.
I know women get turned down as well. Maybe I’m not ready for dating
I’m not really a redpill or incel kind of guy, so hopefully that didn’t come off as tooo mgtow-esque
You got downvoted so it probably did, lol
I'm really curious about the context behind these 2 people's relationship.
Like I can't imagine someone that you would be perfectly fine to interact with in group setting and make plans with, but the prospect of going on one dinner date sends you into a state of absolute terror.
She could have at least eased the pain and said that she had already invited her friend. Poor guy.
She's fucking "the friend"...which probably made dinner more awkward.
I’d say this is one of those situations where the organiser of said dinner “date” (the blue messages) looks to be in the wrong here.
I'd like to know what happened? If only to answer where the OP got that from.
Pretty sure it’s a repost
This has been reposted plenty.
I would have answered something like « nvm I’m not hungry anymore »
Those "Hahahahas" are painful
It’s because he said hype instead of hyped, which is grammatically correct
Ashamed to admit I did this once... A guy asked me out and when he picked me up I stupidly asked if anyone else was coming. I actually did like him but I was Very bad at reading people, and it never occurred to me that it was a date until I was literally already there lmao. Thankfully he took it in stride but in hindsight I probably gave him a heart attack
Always cringeworthy when there’s more than a single “ha”
ouch, ive been let down painfully before, but this is painful even for me
“Nah I’m cool.”
Jesus Christ, just tell them “never mind” or “no”.
This brings back terrible memories, terrible and recent ouch...
What did he do to make her literally scared to be alone with him??
Not necessarily afraid for their life but more of a "This wasn't meant to be a date". As to not give him the wrong impression.
Without knowing any of the context it is hard to say she was "scared". It could just as easily be that she didn't want him to think it was a date and instead of having that awkward conversation just invited friends hoping he would take the hint.
Fuck me this one hurt real bad
Hahahahahas in chat boys
I would have just ghosted her and not show up at that point.
At that point I just wouldn’t go
Man id just bring a different girl
i mean its not really his fault if he wasn't clear with his intentions
Jesus this was posted fucking last week.
And this is where my story diverges. I kill myself.
...look how they massacred my boy
Sounds like they told the girl they wanted to hang out and then switched it on them as a date, not cool to do that
Edit: and cringe
What is sad is that we immediately assume that the person in blue is a guy
Hope the hahahha person doesn't get stuck paying for everyone
This. This happened to me almost exactly, and the woman asked me out! Then when I confimed the date the day before I got the "this isn't one on one is it?I just responded with cool, we're all one check is it? I was told it was curve attempt?
Lol don't even try that shit. Even if they push it that way you just say fuck off, or you walk out and let them pay.
hahahaha repost. literally a repost from like 2 or 3 months ago.. the karma farming is real.
Why tf do i see so many people downvoted, especially you, this IS a repost because i saw it just a few weeks ago
What’s the right response here. How do you come outa this with your dignity
I've been in that person's place SO MANY times. Im glad the i suppose guy accepted a dinner hangout some people are just horrible at talking one on one in a date and actually much more flirting can happen in a casual not weird manner when there are more ppl around
If she was under the impression that they were supposed to be inviting other people, why did she wait until then to do it? 🤔
Who texts someone saying they’re hyped for their dinner date... such a weird thing to do