Fun story...my ex wife was from Scotland and the INS had repeatedly "lost" her family's paperwork (they were investigated by our senator's office and found to be doing this to a lot of people). It took so long, she was no longer eligible to stay in the country without her own sponsorship. For about a year it was hanging over our heads (we ended up getting married). During this time, she was frequently depressed about possibly getting deported once her student visa expired after graduation. So i would come over, she would cry, i would console her, we would have sex. It happened so often that I started getting aroused just merely seeing her start to cry. It literally took years to rehab myself out of this.


So you’re Pavlov’s dog


I think it's cute though that she was so into you she would cry in fear or being separated.


I dont know how to respond to this but damn


When I'm dating someone new and things start getting deeper and more personal, I share this story. Luckily everyone i've told found it hilarious and totally understandable. A couple of past GFs started to cry about something in their life and then looked at me and asked me if i was getting a boner. It's surprisingly useful because even though they're upset, they get a good laugh out of it, which helps them feel a little better.


When you put it like that, it's weirdly sweet. Good ice breaker for awkward moments so im glad you found a good use for it


Mem…..? Member berries? From South Park?


'member Ghostbusters?


I member! Member Reagan?


Ohhhhh I member! Member those colorful pens that smelled like fruits?


Ohh I member! Member chewbacca?


Yeah! Member feeling safe?


Pepperidge Farm members


It still bothers me that they did absolutely nothing w that plot they set up, just because they expected Hilary to win. That, and Canada getting nuked. Seeing the episodes in real time had me so confused


Ooooh yeah I member


I member!


Anecdotally, my wife can't stand to see a man cry - even on TV and if it's a good actor she'll be bawling 5 minutes in. No ft father figure growing up and was abused as a child.


As a mam, I can confirm this is true.


Yes, women experience an increase in Testosterone when men cry around them. I cried by a group of women once and they beat the shit out of me.




I don’t know I think dudes will still get a boner if a girl cries in his shoulders


I think so too. Grieving people have sex all the time to comfort each other


Arousal when they aren’t crying? That’s true by default.


No, I think he's wondering if women feel less arousal when around men crying.


Ohh my bad. My joke was pretty bad anyway


Sorry, I thought this was r/science, where jokes aren't really common. I just thought you were serious instead of being indirect at calling his post a joke.


? I didn’t call his post a joke? I’m not sure why you would jump to that. I said I made a bad joke, and that’s quite a leap. Nevertheless, you’re right. I’ll be honest and admit that I had just come from a less serious sub and wasn’t really thinking- so I responded the way I would have there.. With a joke that wasn’t appropriate. I do apologize for that. But I’d hope people wouldn’t make the leap that a bad joke comment is saying OP is saying something I consider a joke. I certainly did not and would not have ever said that. So I just want to be clear on that. I’d delete this but maybe someone will see it at the bottom and be reminded that context is important for post comment dialogue integrity.


That's fair sorry


It’s r/psychology


\*Sucks air through teeth\* Ah, yeah, that dry face turns me on so much.


Strangely i get hard when my girl cries. Never understood why though


I’ve met a couple guys that definitely get turned on when I cry lol.


Learned pattern? Too much porn?


Normal. Crying is a vulnerable and intimate moment, which can feel sexy. Even if logically you know it may not be the appropriate time. You might get the same way when your partner is sick. All pathetic and needing help. Kinda cute. Brains are weird.


Yeah, isn’t it kind of linked to make-up sex?


You might be on your way into BDSM


Or a psychopath?


Anti-Social Personality Disorder - DSM-V


Confirmed psychopath sadly


Nailed it… Fuck Yeah!


No wonder me and my last girl never worked because she would cry to reveal a lot of old wounds. I was always so open for her but I could not take it to a point when I realized this would hurt me more in the long run. Loved the gal, too. I’m glad I can blame science now. I hate taking responsibility for my actions.


If lower testosterone causes you to get an awkward boner when she’s crying, then yes, I must have incredibly low levels when my woman is crying.


That article didn’t seem to say anything about men’s arousal/testosterone levels when they see women crying. It was mostly information from a survey about how women perceive men crying, and percentages of men/women who admit to crying, how often, and when. I am interested to learn more about men’s perception and biological reactions to women crying.


Did I link the wrong study? Men's testosterone/arousal levels lower when men sniff tears due to the pheromones that women create when crying. It's less psychological and more biological


I'd actually say I agree with that and have even experienced it


Yes, there's a study currently running on pornhub it's categorized as "Japan" if you want hard evidence.


Are you asking for a study of dudes that have a depression kink? Get rock hard and yolked at women weeping?


💀 dead lol


One of you has seen my joke. My work here is done.


Mem are outliers and probably not a solid sample base.


Mem experience many thing


Okay so what I was asking, since it wasn't clear apparently, wad basically: "Do women also experience lower arousal and attraction towards men, or do they experience higher levels of attraction ?" I have heard lots of women *say* they prefer men who are open about their emotions, and find crying attractive. I want to know if this is true outside of self-reported studies.


Florence Nightengale.


I would not get a boner if a girl, my girl or any girl were crying on my shoulder. But as mentioned in a few replies girls crying can be a turn on.


That’s so interesting bc women show less arousal when men are emotionally vacant, so… perfect.


Great concept! Do women like when men ugly cry? I bet it's closed to half.


My ex boyfriend would quite often get aroused when i cried which would lead to cuddling and sex so definitely the opposite of this study