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I've tried Skyrim a few times, but it always gives me panic attacks for some reason. It's so dark and frightening, danger on every corner. I've found my true love with Wurm Online
that one scene from spongebob in which squidward is doing the same thing everyday fr makes so much more sense as an adult 😭😭 i feel like i have to do errands and chores everyday
I just built my first planter box yesterday! Any suggestions for what to plant/put inside? I’ve lined it with cardboard :D (Sacramento,CA)
https://preview.redd.it/nl9vcmmlolja1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&v=enabled&s=45aa545cfaee8fa5830eb7a95548b8e19ebacff6
Hello friend I’m over in the north bay in Vtown (similar climate) and I do REALLY well with ruffled tomatoes since they have some heat tolerance, also waterleaf spinach in the summer and any kind of hot peppers. You could probably do sweet peppers too, I just don’t eat them often lol. Your planter box looks great. Welcome to gardening :)
Sucks that the people you rely on most to not burn things tend to burn out so often.
Seriously though, it’s an absurdly soul sucking line of work from what I’ve seen working front of house.
I was introduced to a fantastic new term the other day, 'futilitarianism'. The author who coined it talks about how our society, despite our technology's vast power & potential, has created a pretty robust 'highway' for the path of our lives - and it's directed towards profit and efficiency ('utility maximization') rather than towards our health & happiness.
It's just completely naturalized for us since we're born into it, like the famous thought of fish not being aware of water. Most of us just need to strap in and learn the rules of the road. But off-ramps are hard to come by, and the fields fewly-frolicked.
EDIT - [link](https://mitpress.mit.edu/9781912685899/futilitarianism/) to the book I heard about
This varies country to country. The US very much this is fitting but a lot of countries are not able to kill their people by working them to death. I get a month of vacation that I must take, every year. I also get 800 hours each year, which is given on Day 1, of sick leave. I only get 80% of my pay but they cannot demote me, fire me, or seek repercussions for me taking the time either. I can then extend if need be but it's unpaid but I get a 1 year extension of unpaid leave before they can actually let me go. So I get 13.5 months from my signing a contract that I can't be fired for being sick.
In Tunisia, the unions here are fucking intense and hold a great deal of power and influence in politics. The 4 weeks, I misspoke, isn't mandatory but you get 4 weeks of paid vacation of which 1 week is mandatory by law but if you don't use it, you lose it and your supervisor cannot stop you from taking them. If they do, they have to roll it over to the next year. So if it's coming up to the year of your contract date, you can tell them "I have a ton of vacation time, I need to take some" and they'll generally let them take the 4 weeks or compromise like "Take 2 and we'll roll 2 over".
The “creature” is the Federal Reserve. Did you know it was owned and operated by private banks? It’s not even a government entity, yet prints money into oblivion, running our economy into the ground.
Following the money will show who rules our world. His book is worth looking into (or speeches on YouTube) if you’re curious to learn more.
It is completely natualized?
In my experience most people realize this is true, hate it but see that just working forever is the path of least risk.
They suffer through it because not working in the system is very very risky, especially if you dont have a community.
> it's directed towards profit and efficiency ('utility maximization') rather than towards our health & happiness.
Can't each of us decide how to direct our efforts? Profit and efficiency, at least in my life, are only for the purpose of my health and happiness.
Now imagine how much worse it must’ve been during the Industrial Revolution or when lots of people worked in people’s homes (like Downton Abbey). We’ve backslided in the last 20 years or so, but this is the “good time” still compared to how people used to work like 100+ years ago. I shudder to think the direction we may go if 1% gets even more their way in terms of wealth gathering.
The wealthy need to be capped like they used to, no one person needs billions on top of billions of dollars. They used to be capped at i believe 25k (which used to be worth a lot more money back in the day) but Ronald Reagan screwed that whole thing up and I swear he’s the reason for a lot of shit that’s wrong with America today
https://www.salon.com/2020/07/26/a-cap-on-income-might-seem-radical--but-it-was-once-a-mainstream-idea-in-american-politics/
Lol, he doesnt even need to read further than the headline. I was gonna say never take a person who uses salon as a source's word for it, but they're not at fault here.
I sometimes wonder what a lot of people actually *do* everyday. I work a ton in a very physical job and any free time is spent being productive towards something, always moving, never sitting around watching TV. I’m only on my phone during lunch, which is usually spent in a truck, and then about 30 minutes at night before bed. The rest of my life is spent constantly doing stuff, and I take pride in my labor. How do you folks think people lived and survived for the last million years? And they didn’t have the luxury to complain about their streaming selection while robots washed their clothes/food utensils, and vacuumed their hut floors. The Utopia is an illusion, a mirage just ahead, ready to trick you into being demoralized about your current situation. You can find joy in your life *now*, right where you are.
Their comment gave me "work will set you free" vibes.
Like, I know that wasn't what they were trying to say, but I don't dream of labor. I don't dream of constantly being whisked off in the current of other people's ambitions. I, personally, dream of being able to work less than I do now and enjoying my time with my loved ones. I want the free time to take my niece and nephew to the park on a random Tuesday afternoon. I want the ability to afford a decent life while having more time to spend with those that actually matter to me. Fuck working, I want to live.
Hey, don't do what you're passionate about, that infuses love and care into this world, that may nudge our futures into a reality that is worth the effort!
Here, push this paper instead.
This is why, and I can’t tell you how much I hate it, companies promote a cultish environment. I work for a FAANG, and they encourage you to make friends, love the company, they feed you for free, they give you everything… but I’m too cynical to not know this is all bullshit. They are keeping from being with my family. Not forced but they sold me the idea that if I invested all that education in myself, I can’t go anywhere else.
Yeah, even I have to admit, as much as teachers have to be angry about, the summers and other breaks are a huge plus. I could never go back to working year around.
What do you do in the summers for money though? My grandmother was a TA for 30+ years, she basically worked an orchard and sold the harvests. I've considered getting into education/school systems, but not sure how it would pan out considering the loss of income.
Then again, working 50+hr weeks in an office for the rest of my life seems dauntingly bleak :/
I can only accrue 180 hours of vaca so I've been taking random days off every other week, but then a pay period happens and I'm back at 179.x so have to "use it or lose it" I guess. I take a few weeks worth of vacations per year but take my laptop and end up being paid to sit on a beach. One of these days I'd like to forget my laptop and cellphones at home.
wow how much do you accrue that the cap is so low? I'm closing in on 1000 hours saved. I got asked to make a plan to reduce the leave balance but it's not enforced. I also can't "lose it".
I accrue 7 weeks of time off per year.
In the U.S., yes. But in a lot of European and Scandinavian countries they get 8 weeks or more of paid vacation each year. We Americans are doing it wrong.
That's correct. I got trash amounts of sleep last night. 35 minute commute this morning. 9.4 hours at work, another 35 commute home. I cleaned a bit, ate, prepared for tomorrow, and since I was exhausted I didn't exercise and laid on the couch instead.
Yep not sure what everyone expects. If it helps some people you can think about how at least you aren't walking to the river every day for water or worrying about roving bands and warlords. Maybe bombs dropping at any time.
They say social media has screwed up a lot of kids perception of self worth, but I wonder how much that crap has screwed us all up for what we expect "life" to look like. I actively ignore the people touring their million dollar mansions or laughing on the beach now or rolling up in fancy cars.
Work hard, love my wife, play with my daughter, love and improve my house even though it's not the biggest and newest. Have friends and family over for dinner and tell jokes. Maybe I'll get a dog some day when the kid is a bit older. It's all about how you fill the time between the bothersome things.
This is one thing I just don't understand. People used to be proud of labor. Labor unions were a proud thing to be a part of, and the ability to be productive and contribute to society was seen as a good all by itself. Labor unions celebrated labor while still fighting for proper work conditions and safety. Those are not mutually exclusive. They wanted to reform society to improve it for all. But now, I don't see that. I just see people mad, sure, but not at the system. They're just mad they're not the ones on top and exploiting others in the system. I don't think that's a positive thing. Completely isolating yourself from society and expecting society to cater to you isn't a great thing to strive for.
That's because labor unions are crushed by the people st the top. I'd feel a lot better about my past jobs in physical labor if we even had something of a union looking out for us, but laborers are just exploited these days. Risking our physical health to meet deadlines, brushing work health and safety off to the side, or else risking our jobs.
What's there to be proud of.
> Yep not sure what everyone expects.
If the rich shared their wealth, we could live in a utopia where people weren't homeless, nobody starved or lacked medical attention. But I'm not even asking for that. I'm just asking for a world where the rich could stop being so greedy and selfish so we could enjoy a better QOL.
Seriously this is obvious. Why the hell do some people state this like the only thing stopping people from finding one of these wondrous amazing perfect jobs is knowing that they should be looking for a job that they are good at, pays well and is something you enjoy.
I mean that is like me saying eat food that tastes good, you enjoy making and isn't poisonous and then somehow expecting this advice to make others into sucessful chefs.
> Why the hell do some people state this like the only thing stopping people from finding one of these wondrous amazing perfect jobs is knowing that they should be looking for a job that they are good at, pays well and is something you enjoy.
I think because nothing is perfect. I think the sentiment is to find a job in something as interesting as possible to you, and know that it's not going to be as fun as the most fun things there are, but you make the best of it. Be really careful with your finances, hopefully find some good people to work with, and hopefully that combination of interesting career and good coworkers is fulfilling. At least this is how I interpret the line "find a job you love and never work a day in your life". We have to understand nothing is perfect, so we just have to see how close we can get to that.
Exactly. My current job is easy and stress free. Is it my dream job? Absolutely not. Does it pay well? Absolutely not. Does it help me pay my portion of the bills? Yes. I clock out and don’t think anything of it. My job means nothing to me, other than the fact it gives me money in exchange for my minimal effort.
There is an important balance of doing something you are good at, enjoy, and get paid well for.
It’s best to have all three. Most people can manage 2. Only having one will destroy you every day and week.
An additional consideration is working in a positive culture. I've had jobs where I was paid well, good at the work, and enjoyed the actual work but the culture was so toxic the stress and anxiety caused so many problems in my relationships, health, etc.
I’ve been doing chores and running errands all day and it’s now 8 pm. Finally have a chance to sit down for a second, then have to start my 10 hour shift. I’ll be up until 7 am. So, yeah. Hence, weed. May the odds ever be in your favor! On the plus side, all I have to do tomorrow is work, LOL.
But you get old first. No real retirement. The rat race just gets harder & less pleasant. The expenses increase. declining health & energy. Then you die.
Get mad.
Join a labor organization.
If those of us who generated wealth had our fair share, the worst case scenario is the islands those at the top buy would see a price reduction when nobody was buying anymore.
Don't let people convince you the current system is fair, the only option, or something we have to suffer through. We've fought labor wars in the past and won an end to child labor, a 40 day work week and the minimum wage.
And don't let people pretend to be temporarily embarrassed millionaires when they're closer to homeless than they'll ever be to shopping for islands.
Class solidarity is the only way any of us or are children are ever going to live a better life.
I stopped getting drunk for a few months…mostly to lose some weight…but wow…sorry to say life seems less fun to me without a drink..like it’s all work.
Yep. Hobbies disappear and your free time is spent working, doing maintenance, or raising a kid. Once you are done with all your schooling. Find a job that gives you a lot of time off and live within your means you'll be much happier.
> live within your means you'll be much happier
Correction, if you live below your means you'll feel like a rock star. So many people climb the ladder and add more expenses which defeats the purpose of climbing
This isn't a poverty rant. That's just life.
Also, you can have fun on your own on your days off or after work. Go to the gym. Go to the park. Watch Netflix.
I only commute/work for 12 hours of my day actually, and I also sleep for a good chunk of what's left so that's technically my own time (this is me being sarcastic in case anyone doesn't realise)
If you manage your time somewhat effectively and don’t let the small 5-10 minute chunks of your day get eaten up with unproductive tasks like scrolling through Reddit you’ll be amazed how much time you “find”.
Also most people only work like 70% of a year when you factor in weekends and major holidays so not really “all day every day”.
Hobbies and if you’re lucky a happy relationship with a partner or not. But yeah it sucks and unless you suddenly find insane wealth it’s going to be like that and I hate it
Some people enjoy work and chores. I always have. I like to feel productive.
Some people actually find a good work/life balance, where they can still find time to relax, take trips, pursue hobbies, etc.
I found the right work/life balance by not having children and not buying a home. That means I have the time and money to do things I enjoy after work instead of raising kids or fixing up my house. It's not for everyone, but it's perfect for me.
I enjoy doing chores like cleaning the house, grocery shopping and laundry but I also find routine relaxing. I’m a social worker so my work day can be hectic but I also love my job. On the weekends I run in the mountains.
you guys make it sound like it hasn’t always been like this, maybe a few decades in the last century things were better in the west but outside of that life has basically always been worse for basically everybody
Basically. The thought alone is depressing. But I think I’m one of the lucky few who likes my job. I feel like I make a small impact on the kids I work with. I do daycare for a school district (roughly 70 kids ages 5-12). I get laugh so much everyday. I’m challenged. My patience is tested. I get to help kids through hard times and be there when they have parents who sadly aren’t. It makes my life feel like less of a grind.
I used to but I refuse to suffer like that anymore.
Dont fiddlefuck around with chores, keep your house clean, I rarely take time to "clean my house" but its always pretty clean. I have a set grocery list that lasts 2 weeks, I go grocery shopping every 2 weeks and thats it. All planned meals are quick, simple & cheap.
Ex: ramen, skip the flavor packet, add a can of tuna, tsp of butter and lemon peper seasoning. Put in bowl under kureg for 10oz of hot water. 2min/$2
I work 50hrs a week, my side hustle (paying hobby) gets 20 hrs a week, i go out for a beer once a week and sleep 7hrs a night.
Having time as an adult means not fiddle fucking around with the droning chores of life.
I have twins! They're pretty mellow and all but it still adds a bit. We have some extra challenges as well. It's not just about stepping up anymore, at least for me. There's a (an efficency??) Wall that I'll hit where I either have to make some cuts in things or overwork. It's not usually dire but my choices affect how much time I have for quality time with my family.
My kids are teens now and they need more emotional support and direct guidance so my house may suffer as a result. It's all good doable but there's a balance. (I get crap from family members. It's part of why I'm clarifying)
Most every animal on the earth spends most of their day seeking food/water= survival.
We are not different in that respect.
Not sure why this would be seen as a distraction?
I like to work as well as do chores, and then stand back and see my "accomplishments". Most of us do get a good amount of our self esteem / self confidence from our accomplishments. I think that is why people like gardening, too......seeing the fruits of our labor.
Netflix is a distraction. Munching while being a couch potato is a distraction. Over-consumption shopping for what we don't need is a distraction.
Idk I see the animals in my house taking lots of naps and getting petted. Housecat life looks pretty posh to me.
Agree with everything you said, just having a little fun :)
The weeks can get pretty mundane — I learned through therapy that one needs to pursue passions regularly in order to get enjoyment out of life. I don’t know what my passion is, but I dabble in a lot of activities that I enjoy. I’m fortunate to be in a position to be able to break up my week with these activities and weave in fun with the work throughout the week:
Tuesday = Rock Climbing Gym
Thursday = Pottery Class (riding bike to class)
Friday = Yoga Class or Rock Climbing
Saturday = creative Saturdays: Painting at home or Making music w/my partner at home or Practicing at pottery studio (riding bike to studio) in the day — in the evening: frisbee or soccer
Sunday = Board games w/friends or Solo gaming, enjoying nearby parks
Being intentional with my spare time/having a schedule with room for some variability has helped me get more enjoyment out of my life — maybe doing something similar may help you
Basically. Try and find a job that will meet your basic needs with as little hours as possible. You should probably have some savings for emergencies, but beyond that don't work more than YOU need too. You don't need the best car, the biggest house, or any of that crap. Find a couple of good friends and hangout with them. Find a fun hobby and do that. Work sucks, don't do it more than you have too.
For me, the answer was to become self-employed WFH doing things I enjoy. Life is too short to work for someone else, care about meetings, never go outside, Casual Friday, etc. I have never made much money, never had a paid vacation, had no health insurance until the ACA, but I have never once had to pretend I was a team player or listen to a boss rank me out for taking too long in the bathroom. It's scary being self-employed, because you can never count on a steady income, and often it is way more work than working for someone else. Most people can't hack it.
There are 168 hours in a week
40 for work, hopefully not more than 5 for commuting, 56 for sleep.
That leaves 67 hours in a week that are yours. I'm a single parent and no longer in school. I have been fortunate to have a comfortable job that I don't hate. But damn, there is time. Get better at time management. Actually practice it
If you don't like the gym find an activity you enjoy that incorporates exercise. A sport, fitness classes, running etc. It's important to have a hobby that helps keep you active.
This is why I've taken the choice to move to a cheaper country in a few months time. For $1000 I go in debt every month in Europe. For $1000 where I'm going I'll rent a house, have a gym, eat healthy food, have a vehicle, can save $400 a month for emergencies, afford hobbies, AND be able to eat out at restaurants.
Currently this month I can't afford any other food than rice. Today's breakfast was rice. Today's dinner will be rice. I also have to walk 3h every day because the bus is too expensive.
I don't think it's worth living in the West anymore. We work so long hours and get nothing out of it. I work around 10 hours a day and in a good month I'll get $1000 but usually it's lower.
Even worse is that I'm planning to study which will grant me $1000 in government aid but if I can only afford rice and no gym or healthcare during my studies, its not even worth it.
Solution for me was 8hour a day job really near my apartment. I leave my apartment at 7.55 and come back at 16.05, I dont commmute and I dont stay overtime.It has been life saving.
WFH could help.Spending your 30min break listening to podcast or reading, just ignoring work and taking max out of every moment.
This wasn't always the case, I read a study which said the average American male works 120-150 hours on average more a year then 90iah years ago.
Don't quote me on it because I'm too lazy to find what I read. However late stage capitalistic values on our society have caused our culture to become more money driven then ever before.
You either join the rat race or you become the anomaly. I pray I have another financial strength one day to swim against the current. But it's hard..
Our civilisation is built by and for profit. It is this way because we are just workers. That's all. Our happiness doesn't matter. We work as much as possible for as long as possible while taking up as little resources as possible so as not to impact profit margins and that's it.
Adults tell kids to slow down and enjoy their childhood because we all miss the joy of no real responsibilities.
Too bad most of us just blasted as fast as we could to adulthood, wanting that sweet, sweet freedom. But freedom isn't free and being an adult well and truly sucks much of the time.
Some of us were forced into adulthood quicker than others. Mostly poor kids are faced with more responsibilities and the 'weight of life' earlier than middle income/higher income family kids.
I wish I could slow down my childhood while growing up, LOL. Never even stood a chance really.
That's the truth. I was a servant before I was an adult. As I child, I was expected to work every day in the home. No one ever told me to savor my childhood because mine sucked.
I had a lot of worries as a kid. I was constantly worried that my parents' financial situation meant that we had to move back to the hood where shootings and crime were common (very dangerous city).
Worried that if I didn't do well in school while also working at a young age that I was never gonna make it since I knew that I wasn't like the other kids with their parent's 'helping hand' or financial help if needed. Worried that we would run out of money and it would be game over for me/us.
I don't miss my childhood honestly. I miss certain small things, sure, but overall growing up poor did a number on me. I like my adulthood even with all the responsibilities, bills, and headache, at least I can control my destiny and make my own money and have choices in life.
People who miss their childhood probably had a good childhood where there was something to actually miss...
I wish you all the best in life. :)
Well! It can be disheartening sometimes to realize that that’s all your life is full off. However, I assign certain hours to various categories in a week so that I have a clearer idea on how exactly I am spending my life. For example, household gets only 10 hours per week which includes daily and weekly cleaning and miscellaneous stuff. This way I have a clearer idea on where my time is going.
Welcome to Adulting! Those that reach the higher levels of Adulting begin to enjoy such things. Eventually, it reaches a point of feeling guilty. When one is not accomplishing, said chores, at that point, the video games and movies pass from view.
You have to find the joy in life and keep going after it. I work from home now so at least my commute is gone. My job is boring, I'm lacking training and I'm probably going to get laid off at some point in this merger we're going through, but I honestly don't care. I do my 8 hours, I leave and do whatever the fuck I want the rest of my evening. I make sure to take every single PTO day offered to me. I take a mental health day every quarter if I need it.
I play video games, host my teens DnD group, cosplay, save money and travel every couple years. Even if it's just a few hours away we go somewhere.
It's easy to sink into despair, it's up to you find joy.
I work during the day, go out dancing Thurs evening, watch The Bachelor with my girls Mon night, galentines event this Wednesday, bar crawl for Mardi gras last weekend, lazy Sunday with my boyfriend playing videogames and trying new recipes. Dog park and sonic happy hour with my boy
Weekend trips and family game nights. Chores when I'm around, but my place is medium messy most times and that's okay. The kitchen is clean and the bed is made, that's my min.
I don't know how some people can get so in their heads about this stuff. Life is as fun as you make it and no one's stopping you but yourself
To address common rebuffs that don't hurt me but keep people nodding along that unhappiness is inevitable:
1. I have been poor before, i understand the mental stress, overtime, etc. If I could to back and tell myself anything, it would that I don't need to "hustle" to have worth. I took my min wage jobs wayyyy too seriously and the people who chilled got paid the same.
2. Most of the things I listed are free or cheap, there's a ton of free/cheaps ways to experience joy, unless you're shallow
3. I work a full time salaried position and I sure as hell don't do unpaid overtime anymore
Day in The Life
6:30 AM Wake Up
6:30-6:45 AM Shit, Shave, Shower (not always in that order)
6:45-6:50 AM Get Dressed
6:50-7:00 AM Walk Dog
7:00-7:45 AM Drive 20 miles to work
7:45 AM Start Job
1:30-2:00 PM Lunch Break
4:15 PM Finish Job
4:15-5:00 PM Drive 20 miles to home
5:00-5:15 PM Walk Dog
5:15-7:00 PM Spend Time with Family
7:00-7:30 PM Dinner
7:30-8:00 PM Bath Time for kiddo (only 2, needs supervision)
8:00-8:30 PM Bed Time for kiddo after reading him some books
8:30-10:30 PM PC Gaming or TV/Movies with Wife
10:30 PM Bed Time
so you don't shower in the evening after working all day? So you go to bed all gross and dirty from the day? wow i don't know how people shower in the morning. but i digress. i would try to fit some exercise in there, but i guess walking your dog counts. side note: im 24 but i truly dont think ill ever want to do the whole family man thing, it seems like a lot of work. maybe once im 50+ and hopefully a millionaire so everything is 10x easier. solid routine tho.
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I also play video games when I destabilise into degeneracy
I think a lot of us do chores when we stabilize out of degeneracy
Samesies
Buying Skyrim has done wonders for my mental health. It gives me something to look forward to.
I've tried Skyrim a few times, but it always gives me panic attacks for some reason. It's so dark and frightening, danger on every corner. I've found my true love with Wurm Online
Ikr it’s too scary for cowards. I quit out of the game when I got trapped in that one haunted ass house. I haven’t been into skyrim since
that one scene from spongebob in which squidward is doing the same thing everyday fr makes so much more sense as an adult 😭😭 i feel like i have to do errands and chores everyday
Nah, it's more of the regular fish doing the same thing everyday.
_"Hi. How are ya? Wonderful weather we're having."_
“Coming to bed, honey?”
I just blaze through all of it and enjoy cooking
This plus gardening saves me a load in therapy
Reminds me I better get on with my seed starts soon!
Just bought all my seeds yesterday…coastal south
Also my fishies, who are not cheap but bring me enough joy that I don’t really mind.
I just built my first planter box yesterday! Any suggestions for what to plant/put inside? I’ve lined it with cardboard :D (Sacramento,CA) https://preview.redd.it/nl9vcmmlolja1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&v=enabled&s=45aa545cfaee8fa5830eb7a95548b8e19ebacff6
Hello friend I’m over in the north bay in Vtown (similar climate) and I do REALLY well with ruffled tomatoes since they have some heat tolerance, also waterleaf spinach in the summer and any kind of hot peppers. You could probably do sweet peppers too, I just don’t eat them often lol. Your planter box looks great. Welcome to gardening :)
Thank you! Great advice! Yes they’ll have to be heat resistant for sure lol
My job for 5 years was line cook and I burnt out so it took me a while to get back the joy of cooking
Sucks that the people you rely on most to not burn things tend to burn out so often. Seriously though, it’s an absurdly soul sucking line of work from what I’ve seen working front of house.
Absurdly abusive workplaces, too. Makes me never want to eat out again
I’ve been doing a lot of writing lately, it helps with the “unemployment depression.”
Yes. It helps I like my job, but cooking/gardening helps.
* weed, but yeah
I thought that was the"blaze through" part.
It truly makes no sense, it’s basically just a way for us to stay distracted until we die
I was introduced to a fantastic new term the other day, 'futilitarianism'. The author who coined it talks about how our society, despite our technology's vast power & potential, has created a pretty robust 'highway' for the path of our lives - and it's directed towards profit and efficiency ('utility maximization') rather than towards our health & happiness. It's just completely naturalized for us since we're born into it, like the famous thought of fish not being aware of water. Most of us just need to strap in and learn the rules of the road. But off-ramps are hard to come by, and the fields fewly-frolicked. EDIT - [link](https://mitpress.mit.edu/9781912685899/futilitarianism/) to the book I heard about
This varies country to country. The US very much this is fitting but a lot of countries are not able to kill their people by working them to death. I get a month of vacation that I must take, every year. I also get 800 hours each year, which is given on Day 1, of sick leave. I only get 80% of my pay but they cannot demote me, fire me, or seek repercussions for me taking the time either. I can then extend if need be but it's unpaid but I get a 1 year extension of unpaid leave before they can actually let me go. So I get 13.5 months from my signing a contract that I can't be fired for being sick.
How long is a work week? Using a 40hr/wk you are given 20weeks worth of sick leave and 4ish weeks of mandatory leave? That's pretty tight.
In Tunisia, the unions here are fucking intense and hold a great deal of power and influence in politics. The 4 weeks, I misspoke, isn't mandatory but you get 4 weeks of paid vacation of which 1 week is mandatory by law but if you don't use it, you lose it and your supervisor cannot stop you from taking them. If they do, they have to roll it over to the next year. So if it's coming up to the year of your contract date, you can tell them "I have a ton of vacation time, I need to take some" and they'll generally let them take the 4 weeks or compromise like "Take 2 and we'll roll 2 over".
This is a genuine question: was 800 a typo?
Nope.
What a wonderfully poetic and profound comment.
You forgot to add how sad it is
I've been about this a lot too but I haven't been able to put it words with this much clarity
I can put it into one word: >!capitalism!<
…or slavery. We’re all ruled by our oligarch masters. This didn’t happen by accident.
And we’re all letting it happen
https://i.imgur.com/8rjOW01.jpeg https://i.imgur.com/QVcnlQ0.jpeg
I like it I’m glad I’m not confused by what you sent of the creature
The “creature” is the Federal Reserve. Did you know it was owned and operated by private banks? It’s not even a government entity, yet prints money into oblivion, running our economy into the ground. Following the money will show who rules our world. His book is worth looking into (or speeches on YouTube) if you’re curious to learn more.
I know who the creature is and who controls the world
It is completely natualized? In my experience most people realize this is true, hate it but see that just working forever is the path of least risk. They suffer through it because not working in the system is very very risky, especially if you dont have a community.
Freaks me out how eerily similar this thread is to the plot of Animal Farm...
Oh wow, thanks for sharing! I hadn't heard this before.
I’m going to have to teach this to my mom the next time I remind her I was born without my consent
> it's directed towards profit and efficiency ('utility maximization') rather than towards our health & happiness. Can't each of us decide how to direct our efforts? Profit and efficiency, at least in my life, are only for the purpose of my health and happiness.
Thank you for the recommendation and terminology...I plan on looking into the book and author
Now imagine how much worse it must’ve been during the Industrial Revolution or when lots of people worked in people’s homes (like Downton Abbey). We’ve backslided in the last 20 years or so, but this is the “good time” still compared to how people used to work like 100+ years ago. I shudder to think the direction we may go if 1% gets even more their way in terms of wealth gathering.
The wealthy need to be capped like they used to, no one person needs billions on top of billions of dollars. They used to be capped at i believe 25k (which used to be worth a lot more money back in the day) but Ronald Reagan screwed that whole thing up and I swear he’s the reason for a lot of shit that’s wrong with America today https://www.salon.com/2020/07/26/a-cap-on-income-might-seem-radical--but-it-was-once-a-mainstream-idea-in-american-politics/
We e never had a wealth cap. Read your own article
Lol, he doesnt even need to read further than the headline. I was gonna say never take a person who uses salon as a source's word for it, but they're not at fault here.
I sometimes wonder what a lot of people actually *do* everyday. I work a ton in a very physical job and any free time is spent being productive towards something, always moving, never sitting around watching TV. I’m only on my phone during lunch, which is usually spent in a truck, and then about 30 minutes at night before bed. The rest of my life is spent constantly doing stuff, and I take pride in my labor. How do you folks think people lived and survived for the last million years? And they didn’t have the luxury to complain about their streaming selection while robots washed their clothes/food utensils, and vacuumed their hut floors. The Utopia is an illusion, a mirage just ahead, ready to trick you into being demoralized about your current situation. You can find joy in your life *now*, right where you are.
Do you think working as much as you do is the most likely path to joy for most people? Or is that just what works for you?
Their comment gave me "work will set you free" vibes. Like, I know that wasn't what they were trying to say, but I don't dream of labor. I don't dream of constantly being whisked off in the current of other people's ambitions. I, personally, dream of being able to work less than I do now and enjoying my time with my loved ones. I want the free time to take my niece and nephew to the park on a random Tuesday afternoon. I want the ability to afford a decent life while having more time to spend with those that actually matter to me. Fuck working, I want to live.
I have a physical outside job too, it is keeping me healthy and mentally helps too.
Hey, don't do what you're passionate about, that infuses love and care into this world, that may nudge our futures into a reality that is worth the effort! Here, push this paper instead.
I am passionate about hanging out with my friends and playing video games...
I dunno why you’re being downvoted , I see nothing wrong with this
This is why, and I can’t tell you how much I hate it, companies promote a cultish environment. I work for a FAANG, and they encourage you to make friends, love the company, they feed you for free, they give you everything… but I’m too cynical to not know this is all bullshit. They are keeping from being with my family. Not forced but they sold me the idea that if I invested all that education in myself, I can’t go anywhere else.
I wanted to be free from work once. But not free from food, transportation, and shelter. Freedom is scary 😔
The best part is that most of it is for making dreams come true for someone other than ourselves
Yep
If you’re lucky your company gives you 2 weeks of PTO! But yeah
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I get 6 weeks vacation. Plus sick time, holidays and other time off. Work for Uncle Sam. Not to be confused with Gruncle Stan.
Work 181 days a year I recommend it
That teacher life tho. I started teaching after 10 years in corporate America and I am SO MUCH HAPPIER.
Yeah, even I have to admit, as much as teachers have to be angry about, the summers and other breaks are a huge plus. I could never go back to working year around.
What do you do in the summers for money though? My grandmother was a TA for 30+ years, she basically worked an orchard and sold the harvests. I've considered getting into education/school systems, but not sure how it would pan out considering the loss of income. Then again, working 50+hr weeks in an office for the rest of my life seems dauntingly bleak :/
Or the state, good life work balance generally.
You mean Uncle Scam?
Honestly, with how Uncle Sam is starting out? I'd go for Gruncle Stan in a heartbeat first, at least he screws you to your face.
I can only accrue 180 hours of vaca so I've been taking random days off every other week, but then a pay period happens and I'm back at 179.x so have to "use it or lose it" I guess. I take a few weeks worth of vacations per year but take my laptop and end up being paid to sit on a beach. One of these days I'd like to forget my laptop and cellphones at home.
wow how much do you accrue that the cap is so low? I'm closing in on 1000 hours saved. I got asked to make a plan to reduce the leave balance but it's not enforced. I also can't "lose it". I accrue 7 weeks of time off per year.
I only get 26 vaca days per year plus normal holidays and then 180 hours of paid sick time. It just adds up quick and I have to use it.
I get 11 days per year…
I get 8 🫤
I have 3 weeks actually. And thank fucking god I’m taking one next week
In the U.S., yes. But in a lot of European and Scandinavian countries they get 8 weeks or more of paid vacation each year. We Americans are doing it wrong.
Luxembourg, 44 days PTO & not including our many, many national day offs.
But also asking each other what their plans for the weekend are OR how was your weekend.
On Wednesday saying: Hump Day! On Thursday saying: Happy Friday Eve!
That's correct. I got trash amounts of sleep last night. 35 minute commute this morning. 9.4 hours at work, another 35 commute home. I cleaned a bit, ate, prepared for tomorrow, and since I was exhausted I didn't exercise and laid on the couch instead.
Yeah dude, but on the weekend you get to do chores :)
What did you think the vast majority of people do? On the really rich or the really poor can afford not to work.
Yep not sure what everyone expects. If it helps some people you can think about how at least you aren't walking to the river every day for water or worrying about roving bands and warlords. Maybe bombs dropping at any time. They say social media has screwed up a lot of kids perception of self worth, but I wonder how much that crap has screwed us all up for what we expect "life" to look like. I actively ignore the people touring their million dollar mansions or laughing on the beach now or rolling up in fancy cars. Work hard, love my wife, play with my daughter, love and improve my house even though it's not the biggest and newest. Have friends and family over for dinner and tell jokes. Maybe I'll get a dog some day when the kid is a bit older. It's all about how you fill the time between the bothersome things.
This is one thing I just don't understand. People used to be proud of labor. Labor unions were a proud thing to be a part of, and the ability to be productive and contribute to society was seen as a good all by itself. Labor unions celebrated labor while still fighting for proper work conditions and safety. Those are not mutually exclusive. They wanted to reform society to improve it for all. But now, I don't see that. I just see people mad, sure, but not at the system. They're just mad they're not the ones on top and exploiting others in the system. I don't think that's a positive thing. Completely isolating yourself from society and expecting society to cater to you isn't a great thing to strive for.
That's because labor unions are crushed by the people st the top. I'd feel a lot better about my past jobs in physical labor if we even had something of a union looking out for us, but laborers are just exploited these days. Risking our physical health to meet deadlines, brushing work health and safety off to the side, or else risking our jobs. What's there to be proud of.
> Yep not sure what everyone expects. If the rich shared their wealth, we could live in a utopia where people weren't homeless, nobody starved or lacked medical attention. But I'm not even asking for that. I'm just asking for a world where the rich could stop being so greedy and selfish so we could enjoy a better QOL.
That’s why the quality of your job is so important. If you enjoy your work and the environment life is so much better.
Finding a job you love, that pays well, and your qualified for, is like finding a needle in a haystack.
Seriously this is obvious. Why the hell do some people state this like the only thing stopping people from finding one of these wondrous amazing perfect jobs is knowing that they should be looking for a job that they are good at, pays well and is something you enjoy. I mean that is like me saying eat food that tastes good, you enjoy making and isn't poisonous and then somehow expecting this advice to make others into sucessful chefs.
Mostly because most people spend so little time looking for it and only really branch out when they are forced to.
LOL, IKR? I can't help roll my eyes when I hear that. Lame.
> Why the hell do some people state this like the only thing stopping people from finding one of these wondrous amazing perfect jobs is knowing that they should be looking for a job that they are good at, pays well and is something you enjoy. I think because nothing is perfect. I think the sentiment is to find a job in something as interesting as possible to you, and know that it's not going to be as fun as the most fun things there are, but you make the best of it. Be really careful with your finances, hopefully find some good people to work with, and hopefully that combination of interesting career and good coworkers is fulfilling. At least this is how I interpret the line "find a job you love and never work a day in your life". We have to understand nothing is perfect, so we just have to see how close we can get to that.
Yeah I would argue it’s more like: find a job you love, that pays well, and that’s easy/stress free. Choose 1 (or if your lucky, 2).
Exactly. My current job is easy and stress free. Is it my dream job? Absolutely not. Does it pay well? Absolutely not. Does it help me pay my portion of the bills? Yes. I clock out and don’t think anything of it. My job means nothing to me, other than the fact it gives me money in exchange for my minimal effort.
You will find it if you keep looking. The needle is there
Coworkers make a significant different, in my experience. Work with people you like, and your life is better.
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There is an important balance of doing something you are good at, enjoy, and get paid well for. It’s best to have all three. Most people can manage 2. Only having one will destroy you every day and week.
But most people only get 0-1 because most jobs are wage slavery (or literally slavery depending on where you live).
This is really good advice. It took me a very long time to find all three, particularly because I have never wanted to turn a hobby into a hustle.
lol so many people here have none of the three, frankly.
Exactly, for my job as a land surveyor, I'm good at it, I get paid well, and I like it enough that I have no problem waking up at 5:30am for work
An additional consideration is working in a positive culture. I've had jobs where I was paid well, good at the work, and enjoyed the actual work but the culture was so toxic the stress and anxiety caused so many problems in my relationships, health, etc.
I’ve been doing chores and running errands all day and it’s now 8 pm. Finally have a chance to sit down for a second, then have to start my 10 hour shift. I’ll be up until 7 am. So, yeah. Hence, weed. May the odds ever be in your favor! On the plus side, all I have to do tomorrow is work, LOL.
You have a night shift job? What is it if you don’t mind me asking? And you also have a day job?
And the you die
But you get old first. No real retirement. The rat race just gets harder & less pleasant. The expenses increase. declining health & energy. Then you die.
Yep, and then if you have the pleasure of getting old you also get to see most of your loved ones die before you do.
Get mad. Join a labor organization. If those of us who generated wealth had our fair share, the worst case scenario is the islands those at the top buy would see a price reduction when nobody was buying anymore. Don't let people convince you the current system is fair, the only option, or something we have to suffer through. We've fought labor wars in the past and won an end to child labor, a 40 day work week and the minimum wage. And don't let people pretend to be temporarily embarrassed millionaires when they're closer to homeless than they'll ever be to shopping for islands. Class solidarity is the only way any of us or are children are ever going to live a better life.
I’ve got time to smoke weed too tho
You need to *MAKE* time for the important things
If you’re doing it right you smoke weed and do stuff
Smoking then cleaning your entire apartment is godly lol
I mentioned being real tired today and my daughter (5) said “Take a nap! You’re a grown up and can take one whenever you want!!” Oh to be young again
Yup. That's why I've specifically taken cuts in order to maintain some semblance of a life outside work.
R/escapingprisonplanet
It’s a shitty formula! You spend a ton of time trying to obtain money just so you can have enough money to buy yourself time!
I stopped getting drunk for a few months…mostly to lose some weight…but wow…sorry to say life seems less fun to me without a drink..like it’s all work.
There's other hobbies and interests out there, including many that involve socializing without drinking, just fwiw.
I think a few good margaritas on a Friday afternoon and some delicious tacos are the only thing that keep me going to work.
Yep. Hobbies disappear and your free time is spent working, doing maintenance, or raising a kid. Once you are done with all your schooling. Find a job that gives you a lot of time off and live within your means you'll be much happier.
> live within your means you'll be much happier Correction, if you live below your means you'll feel like a rock star. So many people climb the ladder and add more expenses which defeats the purpose of climbing
This isn't a poverty rant. That's just life. Also, you can have fun on your own on your days off or after work. Go to the gym. Go to the park. Watch Netflix.
When I get off work I go to another job. Ah. Relaxing poverty.
That’s life under late stage capitalism. It’s lived much differently in other societies.
Right it’s not “just life”, it’s the reality we’re forced to live because of power hoarding capitalists.
Not really considering non poverty can have one income so one partner can stay home or one can hire help, etc
Yes but it's become so much worse after 2020
Hobbies are important. More important than a spotless house.
I only commute/work for 12 hours of my day actually, and I also sleep for a good chunk of what's left so that's technically my own time (this is me being sarcastic in case anyone doesn't realise)
If you manage your time somewhat effectively and don’t let the small 5-10 minute chunks of your day get eaten up with unproductive tasks like scrolling through Reddit you’ll be amazed how much time you “find”. Also most people only work like 70% of a year when you factor in weekends and major holidays so not really “all day every day”.
Truer words were never spoken
You have to smell the roses
Hobbies and if you’re lucky a happy relationship with a partner or not. But yeah it sucks and unless you suddenly find insane wealth it’s going to be like that and I hate it
Must be under 30. I see you didn't mention any of the steady full body pain that starts on your 30th birthday
Some people enjoy work and chores. I always have. I like to feel productive. Some people actually find a good work/life balance, where they can still find time to relax, take trips, pursue hobbies, etc.
I found the right work/life balance by not having children and not buying a home. That means I have the time and money to do things I enjoy after work instead of raising kids or fixing up my house. It's not for everyone, but it's perfect for me.
I enjoy doing chores like cleaning the house, grocery shopping and laundry but I also find routine relaxing. I’m a social worker so my work day can be hectic but I also love my job. On the weekends I run in the mountains.
It does, but I don't know how to live any other way. I'm 52 and can't stand to be idle. It feels weird to me to just relax on a Sunday.
That’s so sad
Why? Doing nothing ain’t everyone’s cup of tea. I too find “just relaxing” boring.
Yes, it does. We basically just live for the weekend.
I knew that's what adulthood was and that's why I didn't want to grow up when I was a kid
you guys make it sound like it hasn’t always been like this, maybe a few decades in the last century things were better in the west but outside of that life has basically always been worse for basically everybody
I’m an adult with plenty of hobbies and not enough time to do them.
Basically. The thought alone is depressing. But I think I’m one of the lucky few who likes my job. I feel like I make a small impact on the kids I work with. I do daycare for a school district (roughly 70 kids ages 5-12). I get laugh so much everyday. I’m challenged. My patience is tested. I get to help kids through hard times and be there when they have parents who sadly aren’t. It makes my life feel like less of a grind.
I used to but I refuse to suffer like that anymore. Dont fiddlefuck around with chores, keep your house clean, I rarely take time to "clean my house" but its always pretty clean. I have a set grocery list that lasts 2 weeks, I go grocery shopping every 2 weeks and thats it. All planned meals are quick, simple & cheap. Ex: ramen, skip the flavor packet, add a can of tuna, tsp of butter and lemon peper seasoning. Put in bowl under kureg for 10oz of hot water. 2min/$2 I work 50hrs a week, my side hustle (paying hobby) gets 20 hrs a week, i go out for a beer once a week and sleep 7hrs a night. Having time as an adult means not fiddle fucking around with the droning chores of life.
I’m glad this works for you, but it sounds sad af
It was easy like that before I had a family. Now, not so much.
I have a kid, adds a bit more to the mix but thats fine. Kids are awesome!
I have twins! They're pretty mellow and all but it still adds a bit. We have some extra challenges as well. It's not just about stepping up anymore, at least for me. There's a (an efficency??) Wall that I'll hit where I either have to make some cuts in things or overwork. It's not usually dire but my choices affect how much time I have for quality time with my family. My kids are teens now and they need more emotional support and direct guidance so my house may suffer as a result. It's all good doable but there's a balance. (I get crap from family members. It's part of why I'm clarifying)
Most every animal on the earth spends most of their day seeking food/water= survival. We are not different in that respect. Not sure why this would be seen as a distraction? I like to work as well as do chores, and then stand back and see my "accomplishments". Most of us do get a good amount of our self esteem / self confidence from our accomplishments. I think that is why people like gardening, too......seeing the fruits of our labor. Netflix is a distraction. Munching while being a couch potato is a distraction. Over-consumption shopping for what we don't need is a distraction.
Idk I see the animals in my house taking lots of naps and getting petted. Housecat life looks pretty posh to me. Agree with everything you said, just having a little fun :)
I’d recommend giving The Dawn of Everything by Davids Graeber and Wengrow a read. We don’t have to work this much.
Social media is a distraction.
The weeks can get pretty mundane — I learned through therapy that one needs to pursue passions regularly in order to get enjoyment out of life. I don’t know what my passion is, but I dabble in a lot of activities that I enjoy. I’m fortunate to be in a position to be able to break up my week with these activities and weave in fun with the work throughout the week: Tuesday = Rock Climbing Gym Thursday = Pottery Class (riding bike to class) Friday = Yoga Class or Rock Climbing Saturday = creative Saturdays: Painting at home or Making music w/my partner at home or Practicing at pottery studio (riding bike to studio) in the day — in the evening: frisbee or soccer Sunday = Board games w/friends or Solo gaming, enjoying nearby parks Being intentional with my spare time/having a schedule with room for some variability has helped me get more enjoyment out of my life — maybe doing something similar may help you
Yes your right
And worrying.
For +-50 years
Basically. Try and find a job that will meet your basic needs with as little hours as possible. You should probably have some savings for emergencies, but beyond that don't work more than YOU need too. You don't need the best car, the biggest house, or any of that crap. Find a couple of good friends and hangout with them. Find a fun hobby and do that. Work sucks, don't do it more than you have too.
For me, the answer was to become self-employed WFH doing things I enjoy. Life is too short to work for someone else, care about meetings, never go outside, Casual Friday, etc. I have never made much money, never had a paid vacation, had no health insurance until the ACA, but I have never once had to pretend I was a team player or listen to a boss rank me out for taking too long in the bathroom. It's scary being self-employed, because you can never count on a steady income, and often it is way more work than working for someone else. Most people can't hack it.
That's my life in a nutshell.
Don't forget the crazy amount of time spent trying to figure out what to eat for dinner.
What about pooping? That's always fun.
There are 168 hours in a week 40 for work, hopefully not more than 5 for commuting, 56 for sleep. That leaves 67 hours in a week that are yours. I'm a single parent and no longer in school. I have been fortunate to have a comfortable job that I don't hate. But damn, there is time. Get better at time management. Actually practice it
Go to the gym, go bowling, have picnics, go grocery shopping, regular shopping
The gym is work in and if itself
If you don't like the gym find an activity you enjoy that incorporates exercise. A sport, fitness classes, running etc. It's important to have a hobby that helps keep you active.
This is why I've taken the choice to move to a cheaper country in a few months time. For $1000 I go in debt every month in Europe. For $1000 where I'm going I'll rent a house, have a gym, eat healthy food, have a vehicle, can save $400 a month for emergencies, afford hobbies, AND be able to eat out at restaurants. Currently this month I can't afford any other food than rice. Today's breakfast was rice. Today's dinner will be rice. I also have to walk 3h every day because the bus is too expensive. I don't think it's worth living in the West anymore. We work so long hours and get nothing out of it. I work around 10 hours a day and in a good month I'll get $1000 but usually it's lower. Even worse is that I'm planning to study which will grant me $1000 in government aid but if I can only afford rice and no gym or healthcare during my studies, its not even worth it.
Solution for me was 8hour a day job really near my apartment. I leave my apartment at 7.55 and come back at 16.05, I dont commmute and I dont stay overtime.It has been life saving. WFH could help.Spending your 30min break listening to podcast or reading, just ignoring work and taking max out of every moment.
This wasn't always the case, I read a study which said the average American male works 120-150 hours on average more a year then 90iah years ago. Don't quote me on it because I'm too lazy to find what I read. However late stage capitalistic values on our society have caused our culture to become more money driven then ever before. You either join the rat race or you become the anomaly. I pray I have another financial strength one day to swim against the current. But it's hard..
Yes and yes
I have gotten used to it at this point. If I want to survive and thrive, then I do not have much options.
I do agree but you know what doesn't suck. My family. It gets hard but they help me stay focused. Welcome to the party.
Our civilisation is built by and for profit. It is this way because we are just workers. That's all. Our happiness doesn't matter. We work as much as possible for as long as possible while taking up as little resources as possible so as not to impact profit margins and that's it.
Adults tell kids to slow down and enjoy their childhood because we all miss the joy of no real responsibilities. Too bad most of us just blasted as fast as we could to adulthood, wanting that sweet, sweet freedom. But freedom isn't free and being an adult well and truly sucks much of the time.
Some of us were forced into adulthood quicker than others. Mostly poor kids are faced with more responsibilities and the 'weight of life' earlier than middle income/higher income family kids. I wish I could slow down my childhood while growing up, LOL. Never even stood a chance really.
That's the truth. I was a servant before I was an adult. As I child, I was expected to work every day in the home. No one ever told me to savor my childhood because mine sucked.
I had a lot of worries as a kid. I was constantly worried that my parents' financial situation meant that we had to move back to the hood where shootings and crime were common (very dangerous city). Worried that if I didn't do well in school while also working at a young age that I was never gonna make it since I knew that I wasn't like the other kids with their parent's 'helping hand' or financial help if needed. Worried that we would run out of money and it would be game over for me/us. I don't miss my childhood honestly. I miss certain small things, sure, but overall growing up poor did a number on me. I like my adulthood even with all the responsibilities, bills, and headache, at least I can control my destiny and make my own money and have choices in life. People who miss their childhood probably had a good childhood where there was something to actually miss... I wish you all the best in life. :)
Well! It can be disheartening sometimes to realize that that’s all your life is full off. However, I assign certain hours to various categories in a week so that I have a clearer idea on how exactly I am spending my life. For example, household gets only 10 hours per week which includes daily and weekly cleaning and miscellaneous stuff. This way I have a clearer idea on where my time is going.
Welcome to Adulting! Those that reach the higher levels of Adulting begin to enjoy such things. Eventually, it reaches a point of feeling guilty. When one is not accomplishing, said chores, at that point, the video games and movies pass from view.
I'm convinced that this is hell
That's Adulting 1.0 When you have kids and are responsible for little humans... That's Adulting 2.0
You have to find the joy in life and keep going after it. I work from home now so at least my commute is gone. My job is boring, I'm lacking training and I'm probably going to get laid off at some point in this merger we're going through, but I honestly don't care. I do my 8 hours, I leave and do whatever the fuck I want the rest of my evening. I make sure to take every single PTO day offered to me. I take a mental health day every quarter if I need it. I play video games, host my teens DnD group, cosplay, save money and travel every couple years. Even if it's just a few hours away we go somewhere. It's easy to sink into despair, it's up to you find joy.
And sleep. Which could be a blessing after a certain age.
I work during the day, go out dancing Thurs evening, watch The Bachelor with my girls Mon night, galentines event this Wednesday, bar crawl for Mardi gras last weekend, lazy Sunday with my boyfriend playing videogames and trying new recipes. Dog park and sonic happy hour with my boy Weekend trips and family game nights. Chores when I'm around, but my place is medium messy most times and that's okay. The kitchen is clean and the bed is made, that's my min. I don't know how some people can get so in their heads about this stuff. Life is as fun as you make it and no one's stopping you but yourself To address common rebuffs that don't hurt me but keep people nodding along that unhappiness is inevitable: 1. I have been poor before, i understand the mental stress, overtime, etc. If I could to back and tell myself anything, it would that I don't need to "hustle" to have worth. I took my min wage jobs wayyyy too seriously and the people who chilled got paid the same. 2. Most of the things I listed are free or cheap, there's a ton of free/cheaps ways to experience joy, unless you're shallow 3. I work a full time salaried position and I sure as hell don't do unpaid overtime anymore
Pretty much. It's a massive reason for my depression.
A couple things make it worthwhile. Love. Beauty. The awesome complexity and ripple effect of both.
Adult life sucks unless you love your family and enjoy your chosen career then adult life is great.
22 and screaming about it👽👍🏿
That was my childhood too! Adult life for me is sweet!
Day in The Life 6:30 AM Wake Up 6:30-6:45 AM Shit, Shave, Shower (not always in that order) 6:45-6:50 AM Get Dressed 6:50-7:00 AM Walk Dog 7:00-7:45 AM Drive 20 miles to work 7:45 AM Start Job 1:30-2:00 PM Lunch Break 4:15 PM Finish Job 4:15-5:00 PM Drive 20 miles to home 5:00-5:15 PM Walk Dog 5:15-7:00 PM Spend Time with Family 7:00-7:30 PM Dinner 7:30-8:00 PM Bath Time for kiddo (only 2, needs supervision) 8:00-8:30 PM Bed Time for kiddo after reading him some books 8:30-10:30 PM PC Gaming or TV/Movies with Wife 10:30 PM Bed Time
so you don't shower in the evening after working all day? So you go to bed all gross and dirty from the day? wow i don't know how people shower in the morning. but i digress. i would try to fit some exercise in there, but i guess walking your dog counts. side note: im 24 but i truly dont think ill ever want to do the whole family man thing, it seems like a lot of work. maybe once im 50+ and hopefully a millionaire so everything is 10x easier. solid routine tho.