[Sports Business Journal] Nickelodeon's NFL Wild Card telecast next month will feature superimposed slime in endzones, googly eyes on players during replays and more to give the game a distinctly Nickelodeon look-and-feel.
By - dnytle
If there’s gonna be some cussing, I’m hoping there’s some editing over it with dolphin noises
They're sentence *enhancers*
I'm not slurring my words, I'm speaking in *cursive*, and it's fucking *elegant*
But Mr. Krabs all I said was *dolphin noises*
Hey Squidward! How the *dolphin noise* are ya?!
Pretty *dolphin noises* good spongebob!
And a good *fog horn* day to you too, Squidward!
“What? It’s just Old Malcolm Jenkins in his jalopy”
The Dolphins about to be changed to the Miami Football Team on the Nick broadcast.
That’s a lot of *dolphin noises* bad words!
what an absolutely ballsy move for a kids show to make, an entire episode about swearing
I think it was a commentary on censorship, like if kids know the words then no amount of bleeping will stop their brain from filling it in anyway, and lying to kids about what the words mean or trying to skirt around it only causes problems as the episode shows
Spongebob really is even better as an adult
Well, most of it. I don't even try to sound like a snob, but the new stuff past like season 6 or 7 is awful. It feels like Ren and Stimpy Lite. All of the gross and none of the humor.
Giving it until season 6 is definitely not sounding like a snob. (And its anything after Season 3 that's bad, as a real snob)
Two words: slide whistle
HE SAID NUMBER 11!!!!
The cussing episode is one of the greats
Can't wait to hear a QB yell "GET FUCKING SET" on Nickelodeon
"GOSH DARNIT DONALD"
If Philip Rivers had been our QB then
Golly gee, Jonathan, I said pistol formation not shotgun!
WOAH THERE, MY FRIEND
HEY SHULER, YOU BETTER HOPE I NEVER GET BACK IN THERE OR IM GUNNA MAKE SOME FLIPPIN' FRIENDS!
That's my QB! 😭
Replace it with the spongebob dolphin noises and an angry looking mr krabs on screen
Fuck the superimposed slime, bring out the real slime.
Dear ~~Satan~~ Santa,
All I want for Christmas is to see Aaron Rodgers get slimed after taking a sack. I’ve been a good boy and always eat my veggies. Please give the bad man the green bukake.
turn his ass into a Green Bay, you say?
I love you.
Better idea. Replace the gatorade in the jug with slime. So that way, the winning coach can really get dunked on
Well it's the Wild Card games so GB won't be playing.
Would you settle for Jared Goff?
Thank you for the vote of confidence.
I'll go vegan if it'll help make this happen sandy claws
Honestly, the NFL would be much more entertaining if the field was trapped.
Imagine Michael Thomas running a slant and slipping on a banana peel. Or a DB running down Derrick Henry only to step on a rake and fall over. You could have a guy with a comically-oversized butterfly net chase down the QB every play.
I wanna see that world.
RB tries to run through what he thinks is a hole in the D-line only to be a brick wall painted to look like an open space. Smacks head first & slowly slides down the wall.
Make this the new pro bowl and we’ve got a deal
>Or a DB running down Derrick Henry only to step on a rake and fall over.
Poor Sideshow Bob can't catch a break in the NFL either apparently
Pro Bowl with Slimezones instead of endzones.
Are Gatorade baths reserved for Conference title games and the Super Bowl?
Could slime the winning head coach instead
We are one step closer to my lifelong dream: The Pro Bowl just being NFL players doing skill challenges from Double Dare and Legends of the Hidden Temple.
I'm gonna need an Aggro Crag
Give Mike O'Malley a frog and I'm sure he'd agree to do play-by-play
I really appreciate this reference
Fuck a coin flip.
They should use the AggroCrag to tiebreak draft picks.
I'm going to need Mo...
She's the reason I have a referee fetish...
Could you even fucking imagine the players doing an Aggro Crag or having to put together the fucking monkey!
Stiff arming temple guards
The temple guards are gonna have to be other players cuz imagine if Aaron Donald fucking got snuck up on by a guard that's just a regular dude. That dude's for sure dead.
Scratch everything, new plan entirely.
The *Combine* is replaced with Legends of the Hidden Temple. And players selected to the Pro Bowl get to be the temple guards.
I'm forwarding your username to Roger Goodell as we speak.
Ju-Ju TikTok dancing in front of the Olmac head.
I want to see Donald, Mack, and Watt racing up an aggro crag.
Instead of throwing a challenge flag to challenge a play, coaches must complete a physical challenge. If they can complete the challenge in 30 seconds, then the play is overturned
Purple Parrots are going all the way this year
What the fuck
I’m watching this version
Why didn’t they do this when I was a kid😩
Imagine shitty late 90s early 2000s television CG during a live telecast...
I'd be all over it
Edit: Yes, I'm aware of the glow puck. Yes I also loved it as a kid.
I want it now lol
As long as there's some Temple Run as the halftime show.
Can you imagine Baker getting sacked by a Temple Guard
I can now
Sweet victory and slime is a must.
they 100% will have sweet victory during the halftime
I mean, my generation had that one time where Jerry Glanville, Nick Buoniconti, Cris Collinsworth, Len Dawson, Pat Summerall and John Madden called a fake football game between [Roadrunner and Wile E. Coyote.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZ0WmbwjRuU)
I loved these when i was a kid, i think there were 3-4 of them and i remember being so outraged that Daffy upset Buggs that i was pleading with my mom that it couldn’t be an upset because they scored a bunch of points to Daffy for firing a shotgun into his rabbit hole but there was no way the refs could tell if he hit Bugs Bunny or not and then waiting all weekend for an announcement overturning the decision on Cartoon Network
"If you count the legal points, Buggs won this game, BY A LOT!" - /u/phillyphanatic35 as a child
Hell fucking yeah
You bet your fuckin ass I'm rolling two blunts and looking for some shrooms for that game
I thought this would just be a normal NFL broadcast maybe with announcers that help explain the game better for kids. But now THIS? I guess all the memes made about it in the off-season weren’t wrong.
Nah those memes were the inspiration
Thats fucking football right there. None of that pansy ass dick tugging smile for the camera bullshit. Men puke, men poop on the field, men deliver their new born baby on the side lines. Fucking hard core dick in the ass butterball foosball fuck it chuck it game time shit. Take it to the showers. Dicks get shoved in places you don’t even remember. We win together we celebrate together. Football is back baby.
> men poop on the field
Not Lamar Jackson. He spends half an hour in the locker room.
Like a fucking civilized person!!!
This copypasta is the way
Am I the only one in this sub who's actually played organized tackle football before?
Like half of the comments I've seen on this sub are so obviously written by non-athletes that it's almost humorous.
When I was in high school (3 year starter for our varsity football team) I would get a full-on sprint going and clock the shit outta whoever had the ball. My coaches called me "speedhawk" as a nickname caus I had such a nose for the football and for those three seasons I was considered the most feared safety in our conference. Senior year I led my team to the state semifinals only to get fucked over by the refs in the 4th but that's another conversation (DM me if you're interested in hearing about it)
So, yeah. I hope yall can understand why I feel like their's such a big disconnect between myself and your typical redditor. Please tell me I'm not the only one who feels this way lol
good god i hope this is also a copypasta
It is lol, speedhawk is a legend
Might as well rename this sub /r/italy cause it's pasta all the way down.
2020 is a weird year. I'mma roll with it.
“Oh my god what a gruesome injury!”
“Let’s watch the replay”
*Nick proceeds to add googly eyes to the player down on the field*
Oh god, if some tears an ACL they could put in the Fred “MY LEG!!!” sound effect from Spongebob.
QB trips and falls trying to tackle the DB who intercepted him. He reaches up with both hands one last time as he goes down and Nickelodeon plays "PHOTOSYNTHESIS" audio over it.
As god intended
All I want now from this game are spongebob memes
My leg sound ✅
Ight imma head out ✅
“Is this Arrowhead Stadium? No, this is Patrick” ✅
(challenge gets upheld) “tHe RuLiNg oN tHe FieLD sTaNdS” ✅
Sweet victory halftime show pls
And not that bullshit 5 second thing they pulled in the super bowl a few years back. The whole fuckin thing with a CGI SpongeBob band hologram in the middle of the field
Definitely a "We have sweet victory at home" moment
It's a 4:30 Eastern Game.
Means it's going to finish AT NIGHT
Nick at Nite?
After a Dalvin Cook fumble
Excuse me, sir, but I do believe you've dropped your ball.
Dalvin: Doesn't look familiar to me.
What? I just saw you drop it. Here.
Dalvin: Nope, it's not mine.
It is yours. I am trying to be a good person and return it to you.
Dalvin: Return what to who?
Aren't you Dalvin cook?
And your team just had possession?
I found this ball you just carried on the ground. And if that's the case, this must be your ball.
Dalvin: That makes sense to me.
Then take it.
Dalvin: It's not my ball.
[Baker when he gets picked off](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/theofficalsovietronalds/images/9/95/SpongeGar.jpg/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/340?cb=20160910022834)
The last time I hoped for a spongebob/NFL crossover I was severely disappointed
Derrick Henry been waiting for this day his whole life
Googly eyes might make his look more realistic
need to add slime shooting out of his ankle
This needs to be a thing
Holy shit lmao
As long as the eyes roll around all cartoon-style on concussions, I'm in
Little birds circling
Romo:”You’ve got to hope it’s just a cramp”
Nickelodeon: Dak’s inverted leg is offset by googly eyes and slime.
[Whenever a player doesn’t get back up](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/0cd3df_9bc0f54559fd4978bf546fc9a3d546e7~mv2.gif)
With a fart sound as you watch the ankle snap
I'm expecting a REAL Bubble Bowl halftime show this time around.
*Winner takes all...*
It’s the thrill of one more kill
The last one to faaallll...
Will never sacrifice their will...
🎵Don’t ever look back on the world closing in 🎶
Be on the attack, with your wings in the wind...
Oh, the games will begin...
And it's sweet, sweet, sweet victory, yeah
And it's ours for the taking. It's ours for the fight!
The halftime show is actually a sneak peek of that SpongeBob But Babies reboot they're doing
The best evidence we have of there not being a God.
“Clarissa will be in the booth to explain penalties, and the football will be replaced with Arnold’s head.”
she will explain more than penalties. Formations, play designs, she will explain it *all*
Imagine if Nickelodeon aired the Bengals-Steelers Wild Card game from 2015.
Or the OBJ/Josh Normal brawl from 2015, or the Steelers Browns game from last year.
Or when AB dropkicked the Browns? punter in the face on a punt return
I'm starting to think the Steelers aren't PG TV
*vontaze burfict decapitates antonio brown*
Nickelodeon: *whimsical slide whistle*
*stares wistfully into the distance*
Oh what could have been...
I feel like last night's game would have actually worked well with this plan lol
"It's big! It's pink! And it's scary! It's.... Trace McSorley!"
Lamar running down the hall saying "WEE WOO. WEE WOO."
Browns Defense: "Yeeeeeehawwww this Lamar aint so tough"
Spongebob: "That's not Lamar"
"We now go live to the locker room where Lamar Jackson is shitting SLIME out of his asshole."
Except for the close shots of Mcsorely down in pain
[Here's how it's gonna look](https://twitter.com/CBSSports/status/1338853924057591808)
Don't know if I'll be able to watch football any other way now
Aaron as the hamburglar is meant to be
This feels like one of those things that won't work, and in 20 years there will be reddit posts from /u/jaguargator10 about "In 2020, the cartoon channel Nickelodeon was selected to broadcast a set of wild card games. Features included CGI-slime end zones, googly eyes on replays, and goalposts that looked like Spongebob. This experiment was widely considered a failure."
Oh you know it
RemindMe! 20 years about how much of a fool /u/Teeshirtandshortsguy probably looks like now.
ESPN about to lose MNF to Nick
Someone smoked a fat one before making this
Nice to see that 20 years later Nickelodeon is still wringing everything they can out of Spongebob
Well it’s still their most popular show so I don’t expect it to end any time soon
And they are a kids channel, which means they have a constant supply of new viewers who didn't see Spongebob 20 years ago.
In theory you could live off the same raft of programming forever.
We all grew up on Looney Tunes and Scooby Doo episodes that were 30-50 years old at the time. Spongebob isn't going anywhere.
Rugrats, Ren & Stimpy, Doug, and Ahhh Real Monsters crawled so Sponge Bob could fly. Early to mid 90s Nickelodeon was legit.
Rocko's Modern Life ayyyyyyyyyyeeee
Don't sleep on Angry Beavers and CatDog
Catdog is this centuries answer to Hamlet. A masterful piece of art. Alone in the world is a little catdog.
It's essentially the Simpsons for kids
Disney’s been doing it to Mickey Mouse for a century so I don’t expect it to end anytime soon
And Nintendo's still resting on the laurels of Mario and Zelda thirty-five years later.
Kinda like Infinity Ward putting at least one MW or MW2 map in every on of their CoD releases and Treyarch putting nuke town in every one of theirs as well.
You're telling me I could have been watching Minecraft Mahomes this entire time?!?
I’m not gonna lie, that looks pretty dope lmao
Yeah I would totally watch this
Oh ya I'm watching that mess, for sure.
Ummm so yea I’m definitely going to take a peek at this game.
The end zone touchdown visual looks cool, but man the rest of that...
I'm so fucking excited for this nonsense
This is brilliant. I’m getting some Scott pilgrim vibes for some reason
So I'm definitely watching Nickelodeon's telecast
They should have Booger do it.
He explains the game well for kids. He’s the perfect fit!
Plus what kid wouldn’t be tickled to hear that the name of the announcer is “Booger”?
Booger would actually be perfect for this
He’s got charisma and seems to do a good job breaking things down in an easy to understand way
"Also in the game is an extra offensive lineman. So I think they bring an extra lineman in to block."
- actual quote by Booger McFarland
The best was Phil Simms in a playoff game between the Broncos and Steelers
["Remember, for it to be a forward pass, it's gotta go forward"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BHzoeT7cEY)
Pre game pep talks:
They play "Sweet Victory" at the half and Im fucking in
And it’s Astroworld
This screams Dolphins @ Titans wildcard Saturday
They can even get the dolphin noises when a player swears!
Has science gone too far?
Yes but that was a long time ago
Will we finally get the Sweet Sweet Victory at Halftime we deserve?
Listen I cannot even lie to you or myself and say that I’m not going to atleast tune in for a few minutes 😂
I demand all football games be broadcasted like this from now on
Hoping they use the same graphics department from MNF.
They have Viacom money, not Disney money
Dan Schneider would zoom in on cheerleader feet.
Could you imagine being a fan of a team that loses in absolutely heartbreaking, devastating fashion that leaves you in tears, only for Nickelodeon to cut away from the livecast with a fucking slime transition and Spongebob laugh?
I know this is an AFC game but god \*damn\* does it scream Saints playoff heartbreak in a new way
if they really think my grown ass is about to tune into this nickelodeon shit, you goddamn right i am, bucko
honestly this is kind of cool
Imagine your team losing *and then* getting slimed.
Lmao this is surreal
Hope we get a Ren and Stimpy stupid idiot soundbite whenever a coach makes a stupid call.
NFCnorthmemewar is going to have a field day
I love this. The world needs more wacky bullshit that fails horribly, will never be repeated again, and then becomes a piece of pop culture ephemera.
Can't wait wtf is this