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SirAmic2

Guess we know who won the race


itsallatest77

Lol beat me to it.


Urschleim_in_Silicon

So.... you're the rabbit in this case then?


backtolurk

Yeah turtle was pissed it lost


SidewaysGate

Guess we know who won the race


PyreHat

Lol beat me to it.


Disidente76

So.... You're the rabbit in this case then?


creganODI

That’s a gnarly thing to beat your meat to


worthrone11160606

Same


Dallashh

So did the turtle


Svendog_Millionaire

Yeah can you beat me to it as well please I’m almost there…


vanuchiha2

Race? Nah the rabbit was just running from the turtle


SirAmic2

Maybe you're right


Conscious-Proof-8309

Plot twist: it was never a race. The Rabbit was fleeing for his dear life! The tortoise: "I told you you'd never outrun me!"


jesteredGesture

I see the rabbit had their own immortal snail to flee from.


HiDDENk00l

Slow and steady eats the face


FaceMace87

With how quick that turtle is moving it must have been a close race though


testcore

Aesop was full of it. We see now it was a total cover up.


bancircumvent

after thinking for a while i concluded i had to downvote you because everybody thought about the same joke and i'm just balancing the envy and frustration. it is almost unfair to write this joke.


SirAmic2

Understood, have a nice day.


bancircumvent

i did not expect that. that was noble! i shall come back with a prize (once my supply of free coins shall be renewed and if i don't forget)


SirAmic2

Good sir, you are too kind.


bancircumvent

thanks for the reward you turtle/rabbit


canaryhawk

I can't find the turtle. Is it behind that tortoise? EDIT: though it could be a box turtle, which does look like a tortoise. despite being members of the Terrapene genus. Hence the big confusion with naming, since they are a tortoise-imitating turtle native to N. America where many redditors habitat. TIL.


Borgh

1. Turtles is the name for the whole group, including tortoises. 2. That's a box turtle, which is taxonomically closer related to terrapins than they are to tortoises. They just said "screw all the swimming, I'm staying on land"


HalfNatty

All spoils go to the victor


Whatunoboutit

This is dark. Nice lol


kboom76

Damn


m_domino

Oh, how the turtles have tabbed! Or something …


blacksmithspud

No guts, no glory.


HaloArtificials

Based.


grantler729

So that’s how he did it


Marauder121

So that's how he won the race. Sick bastard.


Turtle_on_a_keyboard

:)


Just_Del

You monster.


ToastGenerator

This is a box turtle, which are omnivores! They aren't picky eaters - meaning if they stumble across free calories like this, they will often indulge. :)


DerpsAndRags

They really are the garbage disposals of the turtle world.


NaKeepFighting

Always have to scroll down the same joke told 3 times before I can get to the actual info! Thank you!!


pauljaytee

Slow and steady wins the race


tinkatiza

Most turtles are omnivores.


ganglyjew

Most animals are opportunistic omnivores. I know deer, cows and horses would 100% eat a rabbit if it didn’t require effort to catch it


Talkshit_Avenger

I've seen a gopher eating a roadkill gopher. Real Disney moment there.


mmikke

There's a super popular video of a deer eating either a mouse or baby bird. It was in real time and alive so it was more disturbing than this turtle vid


JawnF

You're thinking of [he ate a burd](https://youtu.be/sQOQdBLHrLk) and [this chicken](https://youtu.be/Mwy4X4F3mB4)


DanFromShipping

Good ol' Aida Burd


Skalaxius

There's also a horse that ate some baby chicks. Was fucked up.


nomadofwaves

There’s one of a horse eating a baby chick also.


ZKXX

I wish box turtles had square shells


beingblazed

Neat! Who knew? (Probably a lot of people)


snicklefritz843

I've seen hundreds of yellow belly sliders eat a deer carcass that had fallen into a pond.


Demnuhnomi

Mmm…car ass. Love the taste of bumper in the morning.


gatsujoubi

Aren’t most animals opportunistic eaters? That they will eat „free“ proteins when they can get them.


classless_classic

Used to feed mine frogs and goldfish


MandibleTrauma1

Thank you science toast


ToastGenerator

BRB legally changing my name to science toast


Mad_Mark90

I thought that was tortoise?


ToastGenerator

They look similar because they evolved to survive in similar conditions, but they are actually more closely related to pond turtles! It's a neat phenomenon in nature called convergent evolution :)


TheMulletBurden

I found a box turtle in my yard when I was a kid. He lived in my sandbox for the summer. Definitely fed him everything from hotdogs and hamburger meat to carrots and lettuce. He didn't care he ate everything.


pentarh

You are not you when hungry!


Sensitive_Salary_603

Sneeker


zombieblackbird

Have a snickers pizza, shell dude.


white_android

Is an omnivore. Would eat you if you let it..


Lex8P

See, not if he were eating a rat, then I could make a ninja turtle joke / reference as to how they ate out splinter. But nope. Instead bugs bunny jokes are up for grabs.


HalfShellH3ro

[This guy could be concerned.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miyamoto_Usagi)


Lex8P

Yeah I did have a Google to see and this guy came up. Don't know anything about him, so can't claim anything. Gonna have to rewatch it all haha


NessunAbilita

Michelangelo, NO!!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Lex8P

That's open for innuendos


tjk5150

Yep. Came here for a “tortoise and the hare” joke. Already too late.


Minimum_Respond4861

That's Mitch McConnell


Tofu_Warrior

The rabbit is the American dream


Jobediah

You insult turtles the world over with this comparison!


peckerbrown

Nope; not rotten enough.


Prophet_Of_Loss

Turtles are vicious predators what will kill and eat anything they can catch.


gofatwya

Which isn't much.


Wimbleston

Remember kids, "herbivore" really just means "Omnivore with preferences"


the_real_turtlepope

Yeah, and many turtles arent herbivores


starscream2092

Meat is back on the menu boys !


Ziggyslmn

The turtle was fed up with the rabbits shit!🤣😂


Peetz69

so this is the ending of the race.


Hereforthethrillofit

Tortoise beats the hair - I mean eats the hair - every time.


Hereforthethrillofit

Tortious vs the Hair 2: This time…it’s for keeps


PlagueDoc22

Used to feed my turtles ground beef balls...was a blast as a kid seeing em go ham.


hahnsolo1414

This is the chapter of the book they leave out for the kids.


dicklord303

The end that nobody knew


balalaikagam3s

Donatello, noooooooo!


Gooshuh

I forgot about turtles being omnivores.


ccReptilelord

Turtles will eat anything that they can catch.


im_a_stapler

Opportunistic. There was a vid on here recently of a huge snapping turtle chowing on a deer.


Aggravating-Hair7931

That's a tortoise


jmadluck

I lost the race to make the joke about the race between the tortoise and the hare


leovelag

Yeah... Turtles are vicious. When I was a kid there was a pond near my house, and my and my brother used to go and feed bread to the ducks and turtles. We stopped feeding them because we discovered that due to the ducks being faster they got to the bread 95% of the time before the turtles, so the turtles eventually figured out that if they drowned all the ducklings, they wouldn't have to compete for bread eventually... Once we saw it happening, we discovered dozens of dead drowned ducklings all tangled in the same plant.


jasmin710

Damn... not only vicious, they are really smart to. I didn't know this


DoAsIDo6

box turtles are omnivores.


ClickyTheBlicky

Tasty spaghetti


Yearman8

This is why rabbits shouldn't eat Trix. Trix are for kids


Dirty_Finch

Nutrients are nutrients. Good turtles aren't picky.


burnishedcaterpiller

Contrary to popular beliefs, tortoises are real wankers.


Headplayerincharge

Damn slow and steady is gangsta! Won the race and then ate his ass!


Hellkids2

Master Oogway after watching Zootopia:


TheeJimmyHoffa

Turtle gonna turt


jowgrimm91

Name of the game is survival!


MichiganSavage

Every time


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Tofu_Warrior

They have pretty hard/sharp beaks for lips


Dnoah123456

u/savevideo


EvocativeTurtle

An eastern box turtle. My favorite!


Reckless_Waifu

Pretty fast for a turtle!


BoringAccountNG

Who's winning now bitch.


herbtarleksblazer

Turtle: “Who’s faster now, muthafuckah?!?”


SayneIsLAND

Ya gotta take bigger bites than that 'lil guy. You'll never finish it before it gets cold.


MarkaSpada

turtle - 1. rabbit - 0


sw1ff2

are we sure it isnt eating the bugs that land on it? i didnt know turtles eat meat


Hermit1983

It looks more like it's eating the flies, with maybe a few mouthfuls of fur.


mikeysof

"Still think you're faster than me huh? Who's laughing now"


karma_ubuntu

That is a twisted ending to the race.


FlamingCroatan

Jesus this horrifying


micro_spaghetti

I guess the hare insulted the turtles after the race


thundernlightning97

The metal version of aesop's fable


ZiggyStardust0110

Looks like somebunny was really hungry.....I'll see myself out


DelgadoTheRaat

A cow would eat you and everyone you care about if it had the chance


Pheunith

HBO's tmnt reboot took it a little too far trying to make it more like the original eastman/laird run


Kharons_Wrath

The tortoise has finally [won](https://youtu.be/FvdH32h5JfM)


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It seems that your comment contains 1 or more links that are hard to tap for mobile users. I will extend those so they're easier for our sausage fingers to click! [Here is link number 1 - Previous text "won"](https://youtu.be/FvdH32h5JfM) ---- ^Please ^PM ^[\/u\/eganwall](http://reddit.com/user/eganwall) ^with ^issues ^or ^feedback! ^| ^[Code](https://github.com/eganwall/FatFingerHelperBot) ^| ^[Delete](https://reddit.com/message/compose/?to=FatFingerHelperBot&subject=delete&message=delete%20ht2g64g)


[deleted]

People forget, not many creatures are absolutely strictly "carnivore/herbavore" most are "eat what's available, which is primarily X"


edwardelsa

I can’t believe that a turtle caught up with a rabbit


kiilem210

I guess life is a turtle race


Jamshid_Hastam

slow and steady


Meme_Burner

Man, I did not play that version of Super AutoPets.


KrugZee

It's not uncommon for them to scavenge meat, but [have you ever seen a tortoise actively hunting?](https://youtu.be/C0tjq0u2rDU)


redeemer47

Looks like he’s just eating the bugs that are swarming on and around it. I don’t think he’s actually eating the rabbit.


Scattershot98

Rabbit: You're so slow! Rabbit while being eaten: GOD WHY ARE YOU SO SLOW?!


Firethatshitstarter

That’s what really happened at the finish line in the tortoise and the hare


-Effervescence

"A cassowary can unzip a man* Fucking yikes


EUCopyrightComittee

"A cassowary can unzip a man* Fucking yikes


Pearl4356

Bunny nooooo :(


Pap4MnkyB4by

This coney would go good with some taters and stewed, but I'm sure the turtle prefers things raw and wriggling.


embarrassedsince1985

And they told me they ate pizza


agroyle

The turtle hunted that rabbit. SURPRISE!!


FallenITD

Not so fast now are ya?


Majestik-Eagle

REVENGE IS A DISH BEST SERVED COLD


mandrills_ass

Looks like it took weeks!


TedwardCA

turtles are slow and surprisingly lazy, but they will eat anything slower than them, surprisingly that's plants and dead stuff ​ Sorry Mr Turtle, only one carrion on this flight


Ppsmallv3

Wait this isn't furry porn :(


TheRagingDonut

Metal


BasicLEDGrow

I thought this was a euphemism.


u12bdragon

Doesn't give a fuck about the ants


BokiGilga

My turtles will eat anything resembling meat. They really like thin sluced cooked ham.


ItsMaestri

slow and steady wins the race ❤️


karnal_loco

Who's the boss now innit


santi4442

[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles](https://youtu.be/bojx9BDpJks)


[deleted]

It will take 5 day to finish his meal.


ZarosGuardian

Looks like Cecil Turtle decided to kill and desecrate Bugs Bunny after his car accident scam failed. Poor Bugs.


MrGeno

Turtle: Surprise Motha f*cker. (Wonder how a turtle came about this dead rabbit).


Ninnux

Box turtle no less. I fed mine bananas, lettuce, and grapes. Never hossenfeffer.


Gu27

Play Somebody that I Used to Know sped up and call it "Rabbit Lore"


haikusbot

*Play Somebody that* *I Used to Know sped up and* *Call it "Rabbit Lore"* \- Gu27 --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


CPhandom

That's the part of The Turtle and the Hare they don't want you to know


crazy_ant007

u/redditmp4bot


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[deleted]

That's a fast turtle!


Th3AngrySt0ner

The part of the story they leave out!


fiwaeawi

We know how that race was won


zul_jin_

Дед доел


pbaperez

I thought they only ate lettuce. 😆


Late_Bridge1668

That’s what you get for calling me slow you furry motherfucker


DariusMDeV

ninja kick the damn rabbit


DrBlackGuy99

Box turtle? I used to feed one mice as an intern


butters2stotch

Thats an oriental box turtle!!!


jayxes1402

it was never a race, it was a chace


Isnortbasslines

EverymanHYBRID


DudleyaRose

I feel like most turtles actually *prefer* flesh. Mine go crazy for the occasional bit of chicken xD And I have such a hard time getting them to eat their veggies


futrtek

It's he even getting inside, looks like he's getting hair and flies on each bite


KarensTwin

r/frugal_jerk


HaveaTomCollins

Looks like an eastern box turtle.those are cool.


conejo77

Was not an express conejo. Poor conejo.


thugwich

I watched a mouse swim across a stream once and a turtle snatched its leg. Turtle took it under water about 6 inches. The mouse was so close to the surface yet not close enough. The water was so clear I could see it till it’s last breath. Another turtle showed up and the began taking chunks out of it. It became my favorite animal after that.


Bubba_Feetz

Slow and steady wins the race Cause all he wanted was a taste Of rabbit blood And rabbit meat And not so lucky rabbits feet.


GlassScooter

Turtle eats the hare


StuffedInABoxx

Well you know what they say, slow and steady wins the visceral organs of your opponent. EDIT: removed autocorrect apostrophe


Grad_HD

Hangry💀


pro_timewaster

This gives me goosebumps


undeniably_confused

That's no turtle


FleeceOne

I like turtles.


XVI3

Everything is an omnivore when given the chance.


timmytwobluntz

Anybody notice how he did that slow and steadily


NotoriousWizard

Only if this turtle went ahead with the race, our childhood as such would be very different than what it is today.


DavidNipondeCarlos

… also a dear eats a squirrel in front of a family of humans.


Memento13Mori

Tortoise and the Hare- alternate ending