I don't know. Ask the guy who had his dick cut off with a pair of scissors.
For anyone that doesn't know that story:
https://www-the--sun-com.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/www.the-sun.com/news/2454311/florida-man-cut-off-wifes-lovers-penis-with-scissors/amp/?amp_js_v=a6&_gsa=1&usqp=mq331AQKKAFQArABIIACAw%3D%3D#aoh=16410444737831&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&_tf=From%20%251%24s
What cock? There is no way anyone is walking away intact if you put your dick in that. Unless it's too small to reach the thorns. In that case, the small penised can fill their boots.
I found [this post](/r/dontputyourdickinthat/comments/9lndnn/leatherback_sea_turtle/) in r/dontputyourdickinthat with the same content as the current post.
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No shit; I would call you Sherlock but he’s actually smart enough to realize it’s a joke and you’ll just think I’m literally identifying you as Sherlock Holmes and I didn’t want to confuse your little head.
Lol why would I get upset over a little shit posting troll with no life? You just want me to be upset so your calling me upset. Get therapy and quit embarrassing yourself.
They're actually keratinous spines, so probably closer to fingernails, cat claws, or porcupine quills, giving them a little bit of flexibility. I mean it wouldn't do to have one stab through their own throat.
The subreddit r/dontstickyouddickinit does not exist.
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I found [this post](/r/oddlyterrifying/comments/9ykfqe/inside_a_turtles_mouth/) in r/oddlyterrifying with the same content as the current post.
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you gotta see [these guys](https://www.google.com/search?q=inside+of+sea+turtle+mouth+teeth+soft&rlz=1C1CHBF_enUS924US924&sxsrf=AOaemvIXcE7Mir7QRr-a71BmLTwsK-Js_Q%3A1641017855826&ei=__HPYYTfMaarqtsP3Lyd4AU&oq=inside+of+sea+turtle+mouth+teeth+so&gs_lcp=Cgdnd3Mtd2l6EAEYAjIFCCEQoAEyBQghEKABMgUIIRCgATIFCCEQoAEyBQghEKsCOgcIABBHELADOgYIABAWEB46CAgAEBYQChAeOgUIABCGAzoICCEQFhAdEB5KBAhBGABKBAhGGABQ-QVY0Cpg9zNoAnACeACAAWGIAaUGkgECMTCYAQCgAQHIAQjAAQE&sclient=gws-wiz#kpvalbx=_D_LPYdOQMsSlqtsP-42gKA40) eat jelly fish
Huh, so since those are keratinous spines and not actual teeth, I'd imagine they're a little bit flexible and probably wouldn't poke the turtle's throat at all. That's super cool.
For generations, the Dreaming City housed one of the Awoken's most closely guarded secrets. She is known as Riven — Riven of a Thousand Voices. The last known Ahamkara. She has been Taken. And her death is your calling.
R/dontputyourdickinthat seriously
r/dontputyourdickinthat got you there man
Thank you kind sir
Got to use a lowercase “r/(subredditnamehere)”
Can I put my hand down there?
r/dontputyourhandinthere
Thank you kindly dude.
Came here just for this
Legend
Can I put someone else's dick in there?
This mans asking the real questions
Only with consent.
From the turtle?
Sure, why not?
r/dontputsomeoneelsesdickinthere
r/foundthemobileuser
R/foundthefakegordonramsey
lol
Nailed it.
r/foundthehondacivic
r/foundthehondacivic
r/putyourdickinthere* you meant?
The forbidden blowjob
I came here just to see this comment,now i can leave
No shit! Guess this means blow jobs are out of the question.
Coward
These "thorns" allow the turtle to consume large amounts of jellyfish, preventing them from slipping back out of the mouth.
Don’t the turtles get zapped by the jellyfish?
No, they're immune to their venom
Cool
Too bad Dory isn’t
😂😂🤣🤣
nice eren pfp
Thanks, I'm a hobo Eren appreciator
You're thinking of electric eels.
No he watched too much nemo
Sounds more like the Princess Bride.
It is also used so they can regurgitate the extra water swallowed without loosing their meal.
Now imagine what happens when a plastic bag is confused for jellyfish and is stuck in this poor animal
Hard or soft?
Yeeeaaahhh... I feel like it would prevent EVERYTHING from escaping again.
Came here looking for this info. Thank you.
Forbidden fleshlight
What do you mean "forbidden"? In a completely unrelated note, does anyone know how to reattach a penis? Or even know a guy?
I don't know. Ask the guy who had his dick cut off with a pair of scissors. For anyone that doesn't know that story: https://www-the--sun-com.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/www.the-sun.com/news/2454311/florida-man-cut-off-wifes-lovers-penis-with-scissors/amp/?amp_js_v=a6&_gsa=1&usqp=mq331AQKKAFQArABIIACAw%3D%3D#aoh=16410444737831&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&_tf=From%20%251%24s
That is terrifying. I assume the inspiration for predator came from this
I was getting more of a sarlacc vibe, personally.
Looks like a sarlacc from Star Wars!
Can't have live food swimming back out again!
Boba ain’t getting out of that
Geez. Reminds me of my exes vagina.
Well then sorry for your cock mate
What cock? There is no way anyone is walking away intact if you put your dick in that. Unless it's too small to reach the thorns. In that case, the small penised can fill their boots.
Dick or balls, one you must choose and one you shall lose.....
LOL
We gotta save Cortana
I'm very glad I'm not a prey for sea turtles.
Yet
It’s a leatherback turtle mouth specifically
“Turtles to avoid putting my dick in” Noted.
I'll take "Lists I didn't know I needed to make" for 500
Not gonna lie, thought this was Venom
Sauron sends his regards
Hot
I should call her
Nope!
The metal shark monster from James and the Giant Peach.
Unlocked memory
Looks like the sarlac pit from Star Wars.
Sea grinder
All Predator movie posts below here.
Looks cute
Headcrab.
Well that would hurt
I thought they had a tongue with a strong mouth not an Iron Maiden for a throat and mouth.
r/dontputyourdickinthat
I found [this post](/r/dontputyourdickinthat/comments/9lndnn/leatherback_sea_turtle/) in r/dontputyourdickinthat with the same content as the current post. --- ^(🤖 this comment was written by a bot. beep boop 🤖) ^(feel welcome to respond 'Bad bot'/'Good bot', it's useful feedback.) ^[github](https://github.com/Toldry/RedditAutoCrosspostBot) ^| ^[Rank](https://botranks.com?bot=same_post_bot)
That’s obviously the worm that ate Boba Fett.
Except you just said it’s a worm and this isn’t.
No shit; I would call you Sherlock but he’s actually smart enough to realize it’s a joke and you’ll just think I’m literally identifying you as Sherlock Holmes and I didn’t want to confuse your little head.
Lol, whatever you say dude. I already knew this was a joke. Your joke just didn’t make any sense.
I’m sorry you’re too unintelligent to see the sense my joke makes but it doesn’t mean I’m unfunny, it means your stupid.
Says the one who actually sounds more stupid than me. Imagine getting upset over a joke. 🤣
Lol why would I get upset over a little shit posting troll with no life? You just want me to be upset so your calling me upset. Get therapy and quit embarrassing yourself.
The Gelgamek vagina https://youtu.be/RvGD4Jp3_4I
Wort wort wort!
Charybdis :O
Are these hard or soft ?
hard, they're backwards facing teeth to prevent prey from sliding back out
They're actually keratinous spines, so probably closer to fingernails, cat claws, or porcupine quills, giving them a little bit of flexibility. I mean it wouldn't do to have one stab through their own throat.
No thank you
Put ur PP in there
Shouldn't have a problem with any straws.
With all those teeth they must be really mad, unless they got a toothbrush.
This is why i don’t skinny dip
“Let me light up the runway with something from my personal collection”
Seems like it would constantly accidentally be biting itself… like constantly chewing vertically positioned Doritos
Ugly ass
My master Sauron the great bids thee welcome
I'd Fuck it lol
I thought this was a vaginer
Anything is a vagina, if you're brave enough.
r/Destiny
Excuse me— what the hell...?
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r/oddlyterrifying
I found [this post](/r/oddlyterrifying/comments/9ykfqe/inside_a_turtles_mouth/) in r/oddlyterrifying with the same content as the current post. --- ^(🤖 this comment was written by a bot. beep boop 🤖) ^(feel welcome to respond 'Bad bot'/'Good bot', it's useful feedback.) ^[github](https://github.com/Toldry/RedditAutoCrosspostBot) ^| ^[Rank](https://botranks.com?bot=same_post_bot)
you gotta see [these guys](https://www.google.com/search?q=inside+of+sea+turtle+mouth+teeth+soft&rlz=1C1CHBF_enUS924US924&sxsrf=AOaemvIXcE7Mir7QRr-a71BmLTwsK-Js_Q%3A1641017855826&ei=__HPYYTfMaarqtsP3Lyd4AU&oq=inside+of+sea+turtle+mouth+teeth+so&gs_lcp=Cgdnd3Mtd2l6EAEYAjIFCCEQoAEyBQghEKABMgUIIRCgATIFCCEQoAEyBQghEKsCOgcIABBHELADOgYIABAWEB46CAgAEBYQChAeOgUIABCGAzoICCEQFhAdEB5KBAhBGABKBAhGGABQ-QVY0Cpg9zNoAnACeACAAWGIAaUGkgECMTCYAQCgAQHIAQjAAQE&sclient=gws-wiz#kpvalbx=_D_LPYdOQMsSlqtsP-42gKA40) eat jelly fish
Huh, so since those are keratinous spines and not actual teeth, I'd imagine they're a little bit flexible and probably wouldn't poke the turtle's throat at all. That's super cool.
Done with the internet for today.
Mouth of Sauron
Absolutely not, have a terrible day.
Thanks you just ruined sea turtles for me
Well after seeing that I hope the tiger sharks eat them all. Edit: JK. But for real thought it
TIL to be grateful sea turtles don't eat people
For generations, the Dreaming City housed one of the Awoken's most closely guarded secrets. She is known as Riven — Riven of a Thousand Voices. The last known Ahamkara. She has been Taken. And her death is your calling.
Forbidden flesh light
Pennywise?
ello beastie
Forbidden fleshlight
Looks like horror
Okay... why? What is the evolutionary purpose of this?
I don’t like turtles anymore
But will it blend?
Kinky
r/vaginas
Forbidden Fleshlight
Reminds me of blue waffle
Seriously? This is not from Alien?
Cursed Flesh-light
Oh, look. I guess sea turtles were demons all along.
r/dontstickyourdickinit
Fleshlight Engineer: This is the way
So that's where I left the night terrors that plagued me when I was 9.
Those arent teeth tho :) they hold the jellyfish in place while expelling water
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
You’re saying that those things wouldn’t fuck up a straw? X to doubt.
R/ThanksIHateIt
"Thought I'd make you my guest, light up the runway with something from my personal collection"
Not a single tooth decay
Nightmarish
Wow. The horror.
This explains why a sea turtle will have sex for up to 24 straight hours...sure as hell aint going for oral!
And no jellyfish escaped that day, in the cavernous thorny abyss…
new bottom surgery just dropped
We're definitely not supposed to know this
My body had a visceral reaction to seeing that
And a plastic bottle takes this thing down
Reminds me of my ex gf
Did not expect that.