T O P
belowaveragegpa

The old add an inch rule. All guys know about it.


shekeypoo

That means I'm 2 inches big


belowaveragegpa

Welcome to the club big dogg! U should receive ur welcome kit in the mail in the next 4-6 business days


gdubh

You mean 5-7 business days.


askmeifigafbish

Don't you mean 7-9 business days?


keepcookinkobe

6-9 business days if you really lucky.


Electronic_Extreme13

6-9 weeks if you order off the tv ad


Jewmangroup9000

But there's a 20% discount in it for you


agent-119

Must be a wish order. You get a pineapple pen and not the electric car.


nuadusp

it's cold okay, give me a break


neophanweb

2-4 weeks.


[deleted]

when they say 4-6 business days, these guys mean 4 business days. no nonsense.


Darth_Yeet_

DON'T OPEN IT, IT'S A PIPE BOMB


Grumpy_Owl_

Damn what do you need that firehose for, is your girl's pussy on fire goddamn, stay humble


Jimmy_Twotone

11.5 woman inches... everyone knows the man inches are on the other side... that's a 28" monster pizza.


friggintodd

Gotta measure from the underside.


veedubfreak

Shrinkage is a real thing. It's probably the same bullshit burger places do "Weight before cooking", where your 1/4 pound burg turns into an 1/8 oz burg because they use super fatty meat.


Fraxcat

No, it's not. Literally the dough balls for different size pizzas come in all the same weight and shape. The difference between the marketed size and this guy's pie? The idiot line worker that doesn't know how to slap out a dough ball. That's it. The difference in any toppings or sauce there might be is extremely marginal at best, and frankly well within the variance you'd normally see just from two different people making it in the first place. One follows the guide and the other doesn't, makes a huge difference sometimes when noobs will give you double what the store says you're supposed to have lol. The fucking cheese....I shit you not....they have an "auto-cheeser" that has a hopper on it, and is designed to dispense just enough to evenly cover the thing. Whether or not it's actually being used or if these guys are still throwing the cheese by hand.....who knows. It's a pain in the ass to clean that thing. There's so much natural variance from people just doing shit differently that even if a pizza place was trying to screw people over by fooling them with less toppings than before.....their food cost would still be exactly the same with the same lazy people they hire that won't follow the guide. Source: me, a delivery driver for Domino's for 6 years in the past.


yeahthatslifedarling

Thanks for the laugh Domino's pizza are pretty good, it is still worth it. If you don't want it there...


jacktat2

“It was 12 inches before we cooked it”


floswamp

I’m a guy and that looks like 12 inch to me!


Donghoon

The Subway tactic


Rukban_Tourist

Maybe it's cold?


Junoviant

Customers hate this one dirty trick !


420sebass420

I work at pizza place. Dough is unpredictable and shrinks in the oven sometimes


luchajefe

Yeah this is a nothing thing.


CantFixReddit

AcTuAlLy, the dough's not unpredictable the amount of orders a store receives at any given time is, which just makes it difficult to get the temperature of every dough perfect before baking. In any case, the weight of the pizza is the same either way and thats what matters. If anything OP should be more concerned about it being potentially undercooked


Key-Regular674

No. You're way overthinking it. Ex pizza kitchen manager here. When we stretch the dough it to the edge of the pizza disc it then shrinks when cooked a bit. Pizza disc is 12 inches so we cant go 13 and let it shrink to 12. Simple stuff


CantFixReddit

First it'll depend on the place. I've worked where you're supposed to overstretch the pizza wider than the tray, they call it overhang. The disc is however many inches but it's not floating in the oven the dough can hang over the sides then shrink. The one thing that is consistent is temperature/proofing of the dough affecting *how much* it shrinks. Worked at papa johns for 4.5 years driver/makeline/manager and a family-owned New York style pizza joint for a year. The latter made their own dough though so there were a lot more variables to account for


Key-Regular674

No. It simply is due to a 12 inch pizza disc. If it were 13 it would be fine. You cannot stretch it past the disc. Temperature is always the same.


doyouevenforkliftbro

Was it in the pool recently?


UrsusHastalis

Try measuring it diagonally, like a T.V.


IronRiceBowls

It's 12 inch pre baked


loli_popping

thats what subway said as well. After they were sued, they make sure the subs are actually a foot long after its baked lol


SpaceDude752

Bread and pizza aren't comparable for this. Pizza is rolled out and tossed, so the size can fluctuate. OP is getting the correct amount of dough by weight. It's only the size is off. If they tell you 13.5 oz of dough, can you vaguely picture the size of what you're getting? Probably not. Can you vaguely picture 12"? Almost certainly.


ItsJebotar

Everyone knows OP needs the additional inch


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SpaceDude752

How do you think they measure the dough for those sizes, genius?


Frosty-Object-720

The size of the pizza equates the amount of toppings on it. Then there’s the math equation that tells us that one large is more pizza than two medium. By your logic, I could sell a 10” pizza, and say it’s 15” because it’s the same weight of dough… What if the pizza ordered was a thin crust? Do they get a larger pizza? Thick crust then equates smaller?


stoneyyay

They literally weigh the dough out per corporate standards. The weight coincides to it's diameter when rolled. A 10 inch pizza will get 9 OZ, 12 inch 11.5oz, 14 inch, 12.5 oz, 18 inch 15 oz for example. You don't use the same amount of dough for any 2 different sizes. They will use a pastry board that shows what size they need to stretch the dough to, OR, in dominos case, likely just the pan/tray. As the pizza crust rises from baking, it pulls some of the dough away from the edge, this making the once 12 inch pizza closer to 11.


SpaceDude752

1. No, you couldn't. 2. Thin crust ls are generally pre-measured and parbaked in corporate chains. 3. What? Logical fallacies abound.


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SpaceDude752

That's acknowledged in my original post. I'm guessing you've never made a pizza or bread. But by all means, continue talking out of your ass if you'd like.


BigDaddydanpri

SpaceDude is correct. Dough is premeasured to weight and then balled and proofed. Once it is ready to be baked, it is flattened to approximately the size, topped and baked. No way you can sell pizza by weight due to the differences in toppings. Therefore it HAS to be sold by size. That all said, you ordered from a chain, staffed by low paid people instead of a local owner run pizzeria and there you go....


MurderDoneRight

Yeah, also it shrinks when it's cold so maybe it just got out of the pool. Really you can't judge the size of a pizza just from one photo.


Timed-Out_DeLorean

I was in the pool!


mthomas1217

r/unexpectedSeinfeld


ParadoxN0W

r/expectedSeinfeld


mthomas1217

😂


BlackwinIV

do you measure the pizza from the top or from the balls?


samsnom

Yeah try that


InevitabilityEngine

Nah I am pretty sure this is just forced perspective photography /s


BigChungusDeAlmighty

Nah, speaking as one of most anyone who worked in fast food most of measurements are taken before cooking For example at hungry jack's (burger king in US) whopper patties are 5" and hamburger/cheeseburger are 4" which matches up if measured still frozen, but after cooking they shrink substantially


Odd_Routine4164

The fuck didjoo just say? Burger King is called Hungry Jacks in yer country? I can’t imagine their commercials. Hungry Jacks-where kids are jacked!


tonz0fun

Ya, Australia already had a restaurant called Burger King so they decided to be named after pancakes? Yes, it is that Hungry Jack that they got their name from. Unfortunately they still serve BK food.


BaaaNaaNaa

Never see anyone actually eating it, no idea how the local stores survive.


Mr-Zaxi0

I'm the reason the stores survive, I like the onion rings and find the burgers are better at hungry Jack's.


SpeakerUseful2451

Likewise although Carl Jnrs is starting to gain momentum with my taste buds. Wallet, not so much.


MonkeyBrain551

its because australia is a conspiracy and burger king is in on it! australia is a cover up from the chinese fishing industry to disinsentivice non-chinese fishing operations from entering rich chinese claimed fishing grounds. the truth is out there! think about it, have you ever *met* someone from australia? case closed. /s


Eichelwoods

You’re joking, but in reality this is not perfectly circular pizza. This a hand made pizza that some part time teenager probably made. It is going to have some statistical variance from a perfect 12” circle. It’s going to be slightly elliptical and shrink from baking. Measuring the diameter at multiple points would likely result in different diameters.


estebanxz

Seeing this kinds of comments and taking them seriously, and then slowly realizing is satire, is a journey


snowpuppy13

Or try realizing that some foods shrink as they cook. It’s the gluten in the crust that makes it shrink. It’s the same amount of food it started with.


Autumnsprings

Serious question, does that mean gluten free pizzas wouldn't shrink or would shrink less?


snowpuppy13

Yes! A gluten free pizza typically shrinks less. The funny thing is that most foods shrink when you cook them. For example, think about what a hamburger looks like before and after cooking. Then there are some foods that actually get bigger, like some types of bread. Pizza dough is usually made from a flour with a high gluten content. This provides the necessary stretch & strength of a pizza crust, and contributes to the chew of it as well. Then there are pizzas like DiGiorno’s or Freshetta that have a different type of crust that rises as it’s cooked, and is more ‘bread-like’.


theoneburger

it's a 12" class pizza


[deleted]

It was 12'' before it got baked


Anxious_Jellyfish216

Kind of like lumber, its 4x4 but it really is 3.5x3.5 after milling or treating.


Never_Dan

And how I’m 5’9” with boots on.


Anxious_Jellyfish216

Exactly.....wait?


BickDuttkiss

well, lumber is also better quality so it doesnt need to be 4x4 anymore to have the same structural integrity.


Bradys_Art

I was 12'' before I was circumcised


burtfinkelstein123

Sure and Subway has 12 inch "footlong"sandwiches


myco_magic

They actually had a lawsuit over this


Spottyhickory63

“Footlong” is just the name of the product, and not a measurement of the food the legal defence


[deleted]

Damn, I use that legal defense myself all the time.


Magnaflux_88

Underrated selfburn.


Calestah

If it's a self burn to admit you do not, in fact, possess a 12" penis then I need skin grafts immediately


shitonmycockandballs

Thou’rt unfit even to graft.


reverb137

I’m pretty sure that it turned out they were actually 12” long, but I’m going to have to check Edit: According to the source I found they are generally at least 12” however when they are not it is by less than 1/4” and it is generally caused by natural variability since all loaves are made with “exactly” the same amount of dough that comes frozen before it is thawed, allowed to rise and then baked. Bear in mind that this was found on Forbes so may not actually be accurate however I am too tired to search any more at this time. [here is the link for any who may be interested in reading](https://www.forbes.com/sites/ericgoldman/2016/02/29/why-the-subway-footlong-lawsuits-fell-short/)


ClassyKM

Usually it's caused by employee error. Pulling it out of the proofer too soon or not stretching the dough before inserting it into the proofer. I know I had some major mess ups working there!


Ok_Spell_4165

And yet all of their displays at the time showed a tape measure measuring the sandwich... However their actual defense was that the majority of their sandwiches were actually 12 inches, however despite the loaves containing exact weights pre-baking in the baking process some were a little shorter than others. The entire lawsuit was just a cash grab by the lawyers anyway which is why the settlement was thrown out. It provided almost nothing for the class yet gave a half million in fees to the lawyers.


burtfinkelstein123

Thank you for sharing this information! It's fascinating on a legal level


Increasingly_Anxious

Fun fact… from an ex “sandwich artist” the bread came frozen, we thawed over night. In the morning we prepped it to go into the proofer to rise. Before putting it in the proofer we had to make sure each stick was set out to rest 20 minutes and then stretched properly. Basically pulling it to be the proper 12 inch size. However due to them being ice cold they would tend to shrink back up, or the employees flat out skipped these steps to save time. Frankly we had no time to dick with bread, and prep, opening duties and customers in less than 2 hours… alone… before rush. So they came frozen and were “short” and then baked and shrank more. If the bread resting, stretching, proofing, and baking steps were followed the sandwich would have been 12 “


Whitechapel726

Thank you for your service. Probably good you had no time to dick with bread. I usually prefer my sandwiches to not have a dick in em. Usually.


Solid-Caterpillar643

Some subways have rulers on standby for the certain customers who would ask to have it measured.


AccordingMarketing90

that's what i was going to come on here to say, it's not like you ordered a 12" and it's measuring 9", did you want them to measure after baking and somehow add the inch back on so it was 12" after baking? (which is sure it says somewhere in commercials and on website i'm fine print that the sizes are before baking since it would be kind of difficult to get them to bake exactly to size) damn people on reddit just looking for stupid reasons to bitch


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myco_magic

It's not the size, it's how you eat it 😏


NotAsSmartAsIWish

Dough may shrink for various reasons after stretching. It may have been on the cool side, for example, or at the early part of the proof time, or slightly over- or underworked. The dough is measured and separated by weight, then stretched by hand. It's the same amount of dough and toppings as a 12 inch, though. In other words, you got the proper amount of food, it just looks smaller.


activelyresting

I went swimming! The water was cold!


i_am_mai_1981

There was significant shrinkage!


activelyresting

Like a frightened turtle!


Ice-cold-D

Tell me you work for a major food/bev without telling me you work for a major food bev…. Or other conglomerate


Material-Bunch

Started as 12...before it got baked!!


Bezulba

And before it got cut, half taken out and the rest shoved together...


Sir_Chonkerton

Ya gotta measure corner to corner


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ChymChymX

And all the way to the edge of the grease.


shekeypoo

Wrap your measurement tape around the edge.


ChucklingChuckNorris

I don't know how accurate that tape measure is. We really need a banana for scale.


ProfitHonest9859

How many bald eagles or school buses is that?


GoldElectric

less than 9000


i_am_mai_1981

🍌


OrangeBlade

Thank you but how could we possibly measure an emoji banana without an emoji ruler


i_am_mai_1981

📏


jetstreamwilly

🍕


shekeypoo

Or you can use my pp, it's 12 inches long


blind_roomba

r/bananaforscale


AtomicXE

Is this how women feel?


juicysox

Yup. When you tell us your dick size, we will have our tape measurer ready before sex to see if your capp’in


ScynnX

To see if my capp is in what...?


Fancy_Chip_5620

It's made by hand... expect varience


Stumpy-Wumpy

Yeah, I work at a pizza place with 11" pizzas and we use a press to stretch out the dough, they're perfect every time


Yukinoinu

Food shrinks when you cook it you dingdong. This is why mickydicks says Quarter pounder 1/4\* \*4 ounces before cooking.


AbilityResponsible16

Gonna be honest with you chief.. I don't see how this is infuriating lol


Xx_Rick_Rolled_xX

Yea, it’s just off by 1 inch. And other comments say it’s was 12 inches before it was baked, it’s not like they ordered a 12 inch and got a 8 inch


avidpenguinwatcher

Tbf, off by one inch is a 16% reduction in pizza.


Lostcause75

I agree if anything it’s considerate they are making sure you eat a little less so you are spared by some calories, in all seriousness I don’t really get how one person actually pulls a tape measure to check their food to me that’s the infuriating part


kmj420

They aren't eating any less though. All the dough balls are the same weight. This one shrunk up or didn't get stretched properly


winter203

Its done by weight the crust is thicker than it should be.


jewmoney808

Ah yes the classic douche move. I’ve seen this done for subway sandwiches. This is something a Kevin/Karen would bust out


Shadrach_Jones

I buy the cheap Tony's pizzas and add toppings. They were 2 for 6.00 at Albertsons here in New Mexico


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swiftfastjudgement

I hate getting skimped on food. There’s a local quick service restaurant I frequent once a week. I get the same thing every time, and I know when they’re being super conservative with the protein. So on those weeks I ask for double protein and a lot of the times it comes back as a normal portion, so I don’t tell the cash register to add the $3. I take the law into my own hands.


iamSossy

You have no idea how many bacon and egg sandwiches I ordered in university that secretly had double bacon. I should probably feel bad, but the campus cafeterias were always overpriced and I wasn’t the one who designed the separated ordering and paying systems..


Serbay55

The people behind the counter making the pizza dough aren't machines I guess.


HolyVeggie

This happens all the time and is completely normal. Your pizza dough is preweighed so you get the same amount of pizza. Only thing that may have a little less is the toppings due to the smaller surface but even that could be the same for big chains


Feeling_Glonky69

Before cooking ya fking numbnuts Next you’re gonna pull out a scale for you 8oz steak at Applebees, big ballah


ise86

It was in thr pool!


jellyroll8675

Did you try measuring from the base?


Hollow_Hubris

As someone who used to work at these places, you get the same amount of dough regardless. It isn't measured on "size", it's measured by weight and marketed on it's size because it's easier to visualise. It's the same amount of pizza/toppings.


Ok_Turnover_1235

In other news, 250g steaks weigh less after you cook it


purl__clutcher

Lucky. It wouldn't have fit in the box if it was.


samsnom

All the more proof this was intentional


aeughfish

Every inch counts.


Flaky-Roll-4900

I ordered an 8oz filet!


LeGJOaT69966996

Obviously they ate an inch, weigh your steak next time too at the restaurant 😆


jeansnotTIMMYortommy

Shrinks in the oven due to loss of moisture it started out slightly bigger than 12


Mike-the-gay

“I swear it was twelve inches when I put it in”


randyzive

Maybe your tape measure is wrong. Whip out your dick and ensure your tape is printed correctly.


MerelYael

But the pizza looks like it still has such a nice personality


Fabulous-Mood-4118

How is this different from what every men does when you ask him about his Johnson??


Equivalent-Ranger-10

12 inch grease stain tho. Lol


BusyPaleontologist27

The dough do tend to shrink up while cooking. It likely started as a 12 in


jimyjami

Bozos. Smaller diameter, less sauce & toppings. They’re smart enough to know how to get 12” pizza, cooked. They’re banking on BuTiTsHrInKs. Cattle. And yeah, Big Corporate knows that every quarter ounce saved x millions = Ferrari graduation gifts for their entitled chilluns.


Typ0r8r

You the subway foot long guy trying to milk it again, aren't you?


tobgro100

I'd call that a good 14" maybe even 15" if you ask me:)


Pleasant-Garbage-351

As a guy that works at dominoes… L. We do not care enough to make sure each pizza is perfect especially on a Friday or Saturday. Just be thankful there are no holes in it. Sometimes we take an inch or give an inch and sometimes we fuck up all together thus is the way of the pizza boy. Speaking of which it’s July 4th : (


Coexi

I work at dominos. Your getting the same amount of dough either way it just didn't get stretched out quite enough. We stretch out the dough by hand btw which makes it a process that is prone to human error


Gator242

Better not weigh a Quarter Pounder then; they use the weight before cooking. Something tells me the 12” is the size before baking.


Marzipan1344

I used to work at dominos, they shrink when baked and are hand done so odds of it being exactly 12” are slim


flogger_bogger

Things shrink when you heat them bro. Same goes for pottery in the kiln & and clothing in the dryer


Cultural_Parfait7866

12 inch pre bake and dough shrinks. Common sense.


Cracktower

Wow Petty much?


Yaboiturtleboi

r/mildlyinfuriating users when the pizza is -1% shorter then they expected ”This pizza is a little smaller, now gimme upvotes and karma.”


The_Amazing_Emu

It does say “mildly.”


electric_shocks

No one complains about this stuff and companies get away with it.


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tiedsoda

How do you expect them to change this lmao. They measure the 12 inches when it goes into the oven and baking causes mild shrinkage. Dough is unpredictable and measuring 12 inches before baking is quite literally how most pizzarias measure their crust.


electric_shocks

I take my time to file complaint even though some part of me worry that people will call me Karen because of it.


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electric_shocks

If people could do the math. If they let this slide once in one store, one day, how much money they would save/make? Then make it two days, 3 days, 4 stores, how about 14? It's never about one inch, it's our money we work so hard for.


Helplure

Why are you downvoted?


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electric_shocks

Because people assume it's about pizza. They don't take the time to think about it and the cycle continues.


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kiwis_in_pasta

Who brings out the ruler after ordering a pizza lmfao I can imagine OP eating that once slice and going…. Waaaaait just a minute…


[deleted]

Imagine nickel and diming junk food


East-Bluejay6891

That may seem small but if you were to draw a circle from the 12 inch mark, that's quite a bit it food


doggierescue2021

The box isn't 12".


MrsSnakeySnake

They measure in “girl inches”


International-Pipe

Its the footlong controversy all over again. Damn food chains.


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Pollutine

you ~~got~~ go into Dominos and try to roll/toss/prep dough for hundreds of pizzas a day and see how many perfect 12s you get things shrink I'd be more concerned with the missing piece or the metal shavings/dirt you just added to your toppings


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Ok_Spell_4165

Either you don't use it often, which yours does look pretty new, or you never taken apart the case to one. Mine are always filled with sawdust and metal shavings, probably a fair bit of wood glue or shellac... Whatever I have been working with lately.


Yawzheek

>Whatever I have been working with lately. Ok, one of OPs hobbies is measuring his pizzas then bitching to Reddit about an inch off a pizza.


Pollutine

what isn't on someones tape measure is the real question.


PhoKingAwesome213

Next time they should just deliver a raw pizza and let the OP bake his own.


Cyborg_sam

It's almost like food shrinks when cooked


DahBeen

It’s measured before it’s cooked and some pizzas end up shrinking when cooked


Idontevenknow162

If you ever took a science class you would know shit shrinks in ovens


just-bair

Why don’t you people just have small medium and large ?


MrFoozOG

And to think there's people that believe anything at all times... like from the news or whatever. We're all getting scammed left and right and we don't even know it.


tts420

Dude get the fuck outta here with the fucking measuring tape. What a loser, I worked customer support for a pizza ordering app and whenever we got a complaint like this we knew right away that it was some cheap ass dirt bag trying to get something for free.


Some-Faithlessness75

Seriously someone does it? Just enjoy your freakin pizza man. Or you also take a scale to the restaurant and measure all food according to menu?


The_Kitten_Stimpy

serves you right for getting whatever that is supposed to be from Dominoes. Find a goon NY style pizza place. Depending on where you are, might take visiting a few different ones until you find one that doesn't suck. \-Fucking Dominoes...[facepalm](https://imgur.com/a/Gv6ZTDD)


jikel28

You could just put pizza from dominoes and it would still belong here


Superb-Confidence-44

Be happy, that's 1 less inch of that poison in pizza disguise.


anonymous145387

They really just eyeball the crust when they make it, and I guarantee you there is an asshole manager in that particular kitchen who will scream liks a banshee at anyone who actually uses as much dough as the recipe calls for.


Squirrel_Q_Esquire

Don’t know about Domino’s, but at the pizza place I worked at, dough was done by weight not length. It might not have gotten as stretched out, but it’s the same overall amount of crust.


TheBupherNinja

It's because you aren't measuring the diagonal. /s


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TheGayestRetard69

You dont need the extra inch, fatty.


locoemotion

I wouldn’t be satisfied with 11 inches either. It’s 12 or nothing.