T O P
[deleted]

الحمدلله على نعمة الإسلام


Qashi-Dema

Can someone translate please


noob6524

(Alhamdullah for the blessing of Islam )im not sure it it’s fully accurate but yeah alhamdullah for Islam


Aboudi1259

Its fully accurate akhi 👍


OTRK2004

Thank god for the gift of (the belief in) Islam


monocle-_-

May Allah guide him.


RectumConscription

Ameen.


OS_Eclipse

Ameen ameen ameen عن عبد الله بن عمرو قال: قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم: رضا الله في رضا الوالد وسخط الله في سخط الوالد. "On the authority of Abdullah bin Amr, he said: The Messenger of God, peace and blessings be upon him, said: God’s pleasure is in the father’s pleasure, and God’s wrath is in the father’s anger."


naanguard

Real Talk: How would you handle this if you were in this situation?


DIOsexual_priest

I really don't know. I'd be lost.


BahadurMidfielder

Alhamdoulillah, we are taught in Islam that prevention is better than cure. We should seek refuge from these kinds of situations regularly and adhere to the Sunnah and commandments of Allah swt with vigilance. Also the story of Yunus (AS) teaches us to never give up on people because to grant hadiyah is not your job, we should warn and remind people of Allah and leave the result to the controller of the hearts. A reminder btw is a huge blessing that can be reaped even after the one reminding has passed away, children will grow and realize that death is certain for every soul so when it’s difficult focus on the blessing of advice being given and know giving it is first and foremost good for YOU. THINK how many people have come back from the brink of destruction by the grace of Allah? Remember children and wealth are a test from Allah. Pray Allah is pleased with us and makes it easy for the ummah to please him.


hash-bond

Mashallah very beautiful comment. Jazakallah Khayran


BradBrady

Pretty simple 1. Divorce the wife asap 2.Try to get daughter help. Talk to her from a place of love and offer guidance 3, If she still does the same stuff then kick her out. I’m not gonna provide for her anymore. She can have one of those dudes who use her for her body to provide for her if she wants to live that haram lifestyle. What the heck am I supposed to do at that point? I’m not gonna get punished by Allah SWT by allowing this to occur in my house Edit: May Allah SWT protect us all from a situation like this Edit: pretty simple in theory but what the heck do I know, I’m not a parent. I just know that either way I’d choose Allah SWT first


naanguard

What if she calls child protective services and lies about you after you have kicked her out?


BradBrady

Yeah that might be a tough one legally. At that point I’d do my best to handle it then kick her out once she turns 18. I’d tell her to find Allah and make dua for her. I’d tell her there’s a place for her in the house if she decides to snap out of it and want to live a halal life again. What more can someone do?


naanguard

Ya... and in this case it seems the wife is supportive of this that also means potential divorce as well.


Decent-Skin-5990

For sure divorce...like come on..what mother encourages her daughter to sleep around with so many men. That girl will regret it later down the line when she starts wondering why no good guy will love her and marry her... Plus if dude divorces wife, she might get most of the custody. To me it looks like this is also a reminder that who you marry matters a lot. Plus I think the dad is also at fault somewhere. I've read that women who sleep around a lot had something going on in there life. Daughter might have been either abused or daddy was never home nor happy with whatever she did. Untreated trauma is really bad...


Callmehenan

Good advice, but I don't think 2 will work.


[deleted]

[удалено]


angleon_xenn

I agree with you. I mean I'm not in support of atheists but taking her to therapy and talking to her may solve the problem. Usually teenagers that age tend to be rebellious and do the exact opposite of what their parents tell them. So probably take classes on how to deal with children instead of throwing your daughter out and divorcing your wife.


girlgirly

The father has the obligation of being the provider for the family. You can’t kick her out, and even less if she is a minor. I don’t know if having a haram lifestyle is enough to kick her out and stop providing for her. By the way, the post hints that she is doing sex work as a minor, making her a victim, she is probably being exploited. Would you kick her out in this situation instead of helping her? Like I don’t know, you could call the cops so at least the men who are exploiting her could get caught and go to jail. This whole post and the comments make me feel so bad about women.


BradBrady

Well I think the post is fake but I mean if there’s anything illegal going on then yeah that would be a different story


girlgirly

I know but I just find it worrying how in this hypothetical situation most men are saying that they will kick her out instead of facing their mistakes and accepting blame, saying they will stop providing for her when it’s clear that it’s their obligation as a Muslim father and they wouldn’t even try to protect their own daughter against other men and what is hinted to be prostitution of a minor. Even if it’s a fake post. Most men are describing what they would do if it’s real. And I find this extremely worrying.


The_only_F

This mentality is why the girl is acting like this. The father is doing everything he can to prevent his daughter from getting into trouble but the girl is refusing to listen. At this point tell me what the father can possibly do.


girlgirly

Let’s read the post, he himself says that because his parent were conservative he decided to give his daughter too much freedom and that’s why she ended up like this. Instead of I don’t know, calling the cops when a man older than him is sleeping with his underage daughter? I mean I know my father would probably kill the man if I was in that situation. He could also divorce the wife, he could document everything the daughter is doing and get proof of how the mother is encouraging it. He would probably get full custody. But no, he plays the victim and makes it about him. He literally did nothing to protect his daughter. And the reason why the daughter is like this is because of him. If you can’t see that, then yes, I hope you never have daughters.


Feisty_Wolverine_319

Whether your right or wrong, don't hope one has no daughters , we all learn from mistakes of what we say , not saying hes wrong but even if he is , we don't say if we hope he has daughters or not ,


girlgirly

Yes but at the time you may learn the mistake maybe you already ruined your daughter. We are talking about a human being.


The_only_F

The daughter is like this because she made these choices, it is not because of him. The father grew up in a conservative household most likely following strict rules so he did not want his daughter growing up in that kind of environment and wanted his daughter to have some freedom, this is apart of the fathers mercy but he would soon realise doing this would be a mistake. The fathers only mistake was being too nice but now he is trying to change all this and has attempted to do so by repeatedly advising her and cutting off her allowances. None of these actions seem to be working. As for reporting to the police, the father most likely wants to keep his family intact and does not want to cut ties with his wife and daughter, calling the police might escalate the situation and make things a lot worse. The father is definitely the victim in this story and if you cannot see that the daughter is selfish and spoilt then your children could end up in this situation and you would make one bad parent.


girlgirly

What did he try to change? Nothing. He is playing the victim online while doing nothin. You clearly hate women or at least have a bias against them. You all love to talk about how women should be traditional and wear this or that but completely ignore how as a man you must be the protector and provider. And when you fail to fulfill your Islamic obligations you play the victim. I hope you never have daughters honestly.


BradBrady

Yeah in that case it’s different, for me I was talking more about once she turns 18


girlgirly

So you would just simply sit around and let other men prostitute and exploit your daughter (who is a victim of sex trafficking) and kick her out once she turns 18. And yes, in most countries you’re allowed to do so legally. But that doesn’t change the fact that Islamic law says you should be by he provider.


BradBrady

Idk what the Islamic ruling on that is if the kid is above and age and acts in a haram way so I can’t fully answer what the ruling is but yes that is what I would do if I’ve exhausted every other effort.


girlgirly

So you’re admitting you would just sit around and let your daughter be exploited around in sex traffic. I hope you never have daughters.


BradBrady

That is not what I said at all and inshallah I do have a daughter. Again the post is fake either way and it’s such a hypothetical scenario that it’s hard to even give a straight forward answer. What kind of dad would I be to be ok with my daughter being exploited?? No dad would ever be ok with that


ChickenMoSalah

Man I need to get off this subreddit. Comments like this one make my blood pressure quadruple.


throwingtinystills

?? Why. Providing for your minor daughter is responsibility of the father He would be accountable for disowning and the situation he contributed to in raising her. If she is literally sleeping with men olde than 18 and advising is not stopping it then the bare minimum the dad should do is call the cops. It’s illegal anyways with age of consent laws but I agree with the assessment that it sounds like something worse is going on. Even in a promiscuous society, this is beyond “normal”. The dad should do everything he can to protect her. Not kick her out and leave her to the wolves, astaghfirullah.


Feisty_Wolverine_319

Which comment


LifeBeginsAt20

Whatever he does, she'll be the victim. The Law will be on her side


Opposite_Two_784

This guy outright says he wishes he never had the kid / never got married. Kids and teens can sense these sort of hatred and might act out *because* they feel they were never wanted. I don’t believe divorce is necessary if their relationship is somehow still okay, but it doesn’t seem like a happy relationship. if I was OP, I would get a divorce from my wife and I would ask my daughter honestly: who do you want to be in the custody of? your mother, or me? Having a one-parent family isn’t ideal, but if they’re disagreeing on such fundamental issues like how to raise their daughter, it might be better for the daughter to have just one set of clearly-defined rules (to avoid “mom said it was ok” situations)


Grayhawk845

American here raising (trying to) his daughter as a Muslim (she's 10) it's a constant fight. I feel like I'm peeing in the wind sometimes. While she's a good girl, she wants to be like the other girls. She wants to dress like she's 20. I'm fighting but damnit it's hard. She has access to wayyyyy more information than I did as a kid. There's not a lot of Muslims around me. I work 2 jobs and I'm going back to school in the spring. She is being raised by TikTok and YouTube. I buy her hijabs and whatever she asks for....but I am fighting against her "friends" that spend way more time with her than I do. If she became this person that the guy speaks about... I'd probably die inside everyday.


couscous_

> There's not a lot of Muslims around me Try to move to a town with more Muslims brother. You need a community around you and have her have good friends.


Eradicator786

Be vigilant dear brother/sister; this is your legacy. You can’t fail! InshAllah


Memeations

Give up, i cant imagin that level of stress


[deleted]

U say that now but wait until u actually have kids 😭


omgitzmo

You gotta bring ‘em up nice and early, make em watch Mohammed hoblos videos, the spicy ones 😆🤌


BeenleighCopse

Nice and early…😬🤣🤣start young and you might get through their teenage years


Playful_Art_5364

Buy a ticket overseas without anyone knowing. And start over.


[deleted]

Stop funding her trips to Europe. Kick her out the day she turns 18. Idk it’s a tough one


Queasy_Basis4269

Seen it happen before my whole eyes, dad complete SNAPPED. Didn’t listen to wife, cut daughter off, took all electronics, took all money back, slapped the daughter, and then said that she will be written out of the will unless she gets her act straight. She is much better know and graduating college (so moved past HS) this spring. So I guess that, got to sort out a lot of ugly before they can be good again.


World-Thinker

I would most likely divorce my wife and pay child support for 2 years then leave my daughters life.


ammaraud

Are you looking for an islamic answer? Being an islamic sub? 1- Start early, like 3 years old. Teach her love teach her islam. Teach her what allah likes and what allah dislikes. In Islam, the middle path to teaching is supreme. What i mean by that as a father your child should know love from you but must also wake up for fajr when your father commands it. So teach early, apply middle path. 2- have quran as part of her daily life. If quran is part of her daily life you will NEVER see this kind of behaviors in anyone. Try this out, the people who post about having committed zina in this subreddit. Ask them if they pray fives times daily and read quran (1 page) daily. 3. Perhaps as a father you failed, didnt start early and the above did happen. Then first of all make taubah. The father to make taubah because a father WILL be answerable for the child on the day of judgement. He's the shepard of flock. He is held accountable. 4. Realise that Allah guides who he wills and the best you can do is lead by example. So start being the example first. Correct your salah, quran. Etc everything. 5. If the missus realises all of the above and is willing to help in that regard and become a better person along woth you then all good. Otherwise, divorce is the only option left. 6. Make an extreme amount of dua. If the child still foes not want to do anything with islam or correction then minimize contact to only replies. Cutting someone from your life is not possible in Islam, they still have some rights on you. Like how do you even cut off a blood relation in islam? How about reverts whose parents are christians? The correct thing to do is minimize relations to them if they deliberate try to turn you away from islam. But if they are cordial to you you should respond with courtesy too.


Nugget-the-great

at this point, leave it to Allah and make dua i suppose. if you tried your best raising your daughter and she turned out like this you cant disown her and kick her out of the house


Walldoyasona

I would look at the present, and see what kind of damage control I can do because the past is the past and can't be changed. Not feel sad for myself for starters and try and welcome her back into my life, so I can at least give her advice... The only thing I can do in this situation.🤷🏽‍♂️


xHaroen

try to do everything in my power to bring the kid back to the straight path, if that doesn´t work, then it is their problem and they will be held accountable for their actions since they are an adult now according to the shariah.


[deleted]

Take them back to my parents home country to straighten them out


TheGhostOfYamato

I'd send the kid off to some military bootcamp lol


KA1378

I'd simply disown her.


[deleted]

Disown her.


Eradicator786

I wouldn’t be on that situation because I teach my kids Islam and islamic values. If my kid behaves remotely likes this, I’d take extensive measures to ensure the behaviour is corrected; with strictness, punishment, loving advice, and with accountability for actions to Allah Almighty. I would not allow it to come to this in my life; I as a Muslim will fail!


Unique_Revenue_5771

Personally i would make sure that in the early stages i have absolute control over what my child is exposed to so i could raise them with good principles. When they become teens id start backing off and give them their own sense of privacy and trust them enough to handle themselves in a halal way


mohmar2010

Disown honestly Probably divorce and take all the cash and disappear like i never existed Start a new life a new identity


arsenal356

Better call Saul and ask for what special vacuum cleaner!


naagiskadhig

Disowned.


Real_Mousse_3566

Divorce, take all the cash and dissappear. Preferably go back to my family and chill.


SandMan615

Take them back to Yemen and “oh no, the rebel groups kidnapped them and we can’t find them. Sorry us embassy”


throwingtinystills

Astaghfirullah what are you suggesting?


Dinoman106

May allah help both of them. The fact that the child can threaten his or her parents is already terrifying, especially when that one of the signs of the day of judgement coming is that the mother will birth her master.


_MiGi_0

True, Its already happening, I've already seen countless kids ordering their parents.


[deleted]

[удалено]


arsenal356

That’s why it’s important to raise them right, right from the get go. It’s not about this dumb liberal idea of complete freedom. It’s about giving them happiness and letting them enjoy themselves but within strict boundaries and strong discipline right from the start. Alongside teaching them morals, and why we restrict ourselves from certain things. Prevention is always better than a cure.


High5KNine

I feel sad for him


Golden_Dipper_

I feel bad for him too but I feel like he waited too long to start thinking about resolving the problem, he gave her too much time and now she's at the point where she doesn't fear him or anybody. She doesn't become like this overnight but again, she's almost at the point of no return, I don't know what I would do if I was him at this point, really sad stuff.


High5KNine

You're right, and moreover, the first right of a child is to have a mother with good moral values. That's probably his first mistake.


[deleted]

Thank you Allah for Islam. Alhamdulilah. May we raise pious children and be understanding parents and may Allah always guide us 🙏🏼


_MiGi_0

Ameen.


deniscerri

There is a reason why raising daughters properly, grants you jannah.


Fasteasfake69

I'd honestly rather have sons, raising a daughter is a thousand times tougher


_MiGi_0

I am calling it first, You gonna get downvoted in approximately 3 hours seriously tho, WHY? you get so much good deeds if you properly raise a daughter, Sons are not a cake walk either as a Son myself lol


Fasteasfake69

It would really hurt me if i find out my daughter has sex, or really just turns out to be like this girl mentioned in the thread, i think a boy would be way easier


_MiGi_0

hmm, from what you said, it seems to me like it would not hurt you if your son turns out like the girl above? Its the same for both genders, yeah girls get pregnant hence would have to go through more trouble but at the end, Zina is Zina. Doesn't matter Son or Daughter, no offence bro but your mindset is flawed.


Fasteasfake69

Yeah i would be mad too, but for me it would hurt a lot more for some reason


HORAMAN76

This hurt to read


[deleted]

This is such a nightmare of mine tbh, wonder how things like this happen.


ClimateDizzy9324

To lesser degrees this has already started getting in muslim homes as well. Talk back to parents in a rude way, doing whatever they want, always fighting etc. what happens here in that story of this father is just the advanced version of that. To a degree we muslims have been affected by liberalism as well, and i include myself in that.


heh9529

Lesser degree? My dear bro/sis, things like this happen a lot and even worse to Muslim families. 17-18 year old going to jail for robberies, owning illegal weapons, pimping, rape, gang rape, drug dealing. And their fathers mashallah at the mosque all the time. And girls are not safe from committing all sorts of things, sometimes involving selling themselves like this post seems to suggest. We are not safe from these things just because we are Muslims. Im terrified of being a parent in the west.


Kusoyaro-san

No matter how good your education is the biggest issue is peer pressure cause those kids spend the majority of their time at school with other kids and then again exposed to social media, adds, cartoons, shows all kind of stuff that fill them with all bad morals, so no matter how hard you try, kids are more exposed to the bad stuff that will affect them and you can't raise them deprived from all those nuisance or it's seen as not fulfilling yout childs need and neglecting them wish is actually the opposite, the whole society and community is corrupted, disturb and crazy, I'm so disgusted by this i don't even want kids, I'm 99% sure they will be my downfall and i don't want that responsibility above it, everywhere you see kids get worse and worse, it's a vicious circle


WhosNegan

Unfortunately this is what happens when you raise your children in such an environment. This is why I refuse to have children in a godless land.


Leather-Department71

Fact. My dream is to save up enough money in the west to retire younger back home in Pakistan and start a family there. If I can start up a halal business back home aswell to keep my family in Pak that would be great.. Of course giving back to my community aswell as I think greed and hoarding of wealth is a horrible act.


The_only_F

Pakistan is ironically even worse for women. Sexual harassment is a lot more common over there and could even be dangerous for your daughter. If you really want your daughter to grow up in a moral environment then the Gulf Arab countries are your best choice.


ChickenMoSalah

Aren't the Gulf countries pretty racist to South Asians? I've heard several incidents, I don't know if those were one-time occurrences though.


Leather-Department71

They are. My mom lived in saudi and uae during her childhood and told me her families experience. Even growing up I believe if we moved to saudi we could’ve been way more well off but the treatment of south asians just was such a big factor


[deleted]

Saudi might’ve not been the best, but Bahrain, Abu Dhabi and Dubai are actually pretty good


Leather-Department71

Idk about bahrain but uae as a whole is personally a no go. Bahrain might be nice though


Leather-Department71

I wish.. I hope by that time gulf arabs treat us pakistanis better. Then I will happily move there.


WhosNegan

Inshallah 🙏


Adventurous-Ad8818

If you think the kids back home are any better these days then I have news for you 🤭


haecooba

لا حول ولا قوه الا بالله


Optimal_End_9733

First of all remember that even Prophets had bad family members, remember Nuhs ie Noahs son abandoned the message (which is worse than sleeping around) kufr is worse than a major sin! So just because you have Islam doesn't mean you won't be tested with this. Islam alhamdolillah does habe safe guards against this however which are too many to get into.


couscous_

> So just because you have Islam doesn't mean you won't be tested with this. > > This is true. At the same time, one has to do his due diligence. Choose a good wife to be a good mother for his children is one of those things. It's clear that his wife supports the actions of his daughter. I wouldn't be surprised if they're infected by the "strong independent woman" virus. You also have to do your duty by choosing good friends for your children, sending them to good schools, having a good community around them, etc. Once you do your best, it's up to God.


aroobsarakii

May we never make our parents sad like this


_MiGi_0

Inshallah, Ameen


Ok-Race-9873

His society made him as a bad father.


Ketty_leggy

“I tried to give her as much freedom as she can get”


Ok-Race-9873

Oh... I missed that sorry!


Ketty_leggy

No but this is caused by soxiety that children should have AS MUCH freedom as possible as long as it does not hurt them. Well here are the results


Real_Mousse_3566

Sounds to me like his wife didn't support him at all.


Ok-Race-9873

Ye exactly brother. Agree with you and islam.


Embarrassed_Fox97

This is a reaction to the overly strict parenting style he received. Often times we recognise a flaw and in trying to fix it we go too much in the other direction and end up creating a different, equally as serious problem. This rubber band effect happens with everything which is why it’s important to recognise your own problems and biases before you do something like having kids because you’re a 100% responsible for who they turn out to be, especially at 16.


[deleted]

I would assume the father is in the western liberal world where the society is the one that wants to children as much freedom as they want and see proper Islamic parenting as abuse. The effects of society very well went onto the father.


ElKidDelPueblo

This website will believe absolutely anything anyone else says it’s insane.


PandorasActress

It’s seems unrealistic but there are actual instances of cases like this happening, and yeah we all know this is exaggerated but it’s not too far off from the truth


surreality69420

May Allah guide them to Islam InshaAllah Ameen


strawberry000

Wallahi this is truly sad !!!!! I am reminded to leave the u.s because of this in fear of my descendants going astray..... women here are easily attainable but in a bad way and most of the time its hard to guide them coz of the deep brainwash... one can say its better for muslim men to marry as many of them, protect and guide them.. but do not bring up your child in the west where it is soo corrupted unless you live inna good community.


_Zlatan

It seems as if who ever wrote this is lying/ exaggerating. How do we know he is being truthful?


argentpurple

This has to be fake, I honestly feel that stuff like this and most of the weird over the top stories people post on reddit about being cucked and cheated on are works of fiction by people seeking attention.


LifeBeginsAt20

She has already permanently damaged her body (multiple failed pregnancies, but what about the STDs?) Unless she does a proper medical checkup and stays celibate for a few years, it is impossible, in a couple of years she'll be too far gone. It's girls like these who get trafficked, end up in the pron industry etc. The Man is also at fault for letting it get this bad. I hope things get at least better for him though, she's still 16, so it's not too late to recover, both mentally, physically, and of course, spiritually.


KerimIsStalkingU

I feel really bad for that father. may Allah guide him and grant him success


IQRA_ARIF

Alhamdullilah , we sooo blessed


dragonborn_23

May Allah make it easy on him and his family. And may He guide his daughter towards righteousness.


NonameideaonlyF

May Allah protect us from this kind of fitnah


frankestofshadows

As much I hate to say it's, this happens in our community too. It's not a problem only for non-muslims.


NotMalikjr

This is sad. May allah guide them.


Sevnthscimitar

Humanity goes in cycles. This story is so similar to that of Prophet Lut (AS) and even someone like him couldn’t stop the degeneracy of his own family. Sometimes all we can do is ask Allah swt to guide people and bring about more enlightened times. And they will come again because that’s just how the Dunya is.


blu-dit

Don’t think this is real


Acxab

Even if it isn’t, things like that do really happen…


blu-dit

Not to the degree of this but yeah unfortunately in some ways. I feel usually if this happens it’s a problem from the parents. If it isn’t at least the father can have solace that he did his responsibility as a father, although he might not feel that way.


Petrolinmyviens

Every culture and people have their rise and fall. This is happening with us too. We should learn or this will be us in some years down the road, rather than just point fingers.


Golden_Dipper_

That's true. I see so many younger muslims living in the west straying so far away from Islam and trying to imitate the actions and norms of those who don't worship the same god as us.


Cataclysm-Nerd01

This has to be fake at least. I dont believe this at all


Kalgeris

It is. It’s a karma farming story. We are to believe he didn’t call the authorities on the sex trafficked daughter?


KA1378

Why not? Unfortunately the family structure has been obliterated in western societies.


Cataclysm-Nerd01

Good point. But reading through theres just so mucb that suprised me


purplecurtain16

If this is real that sucks. But honestly I don't believe this is real. The story doesn't check out. What parent doesn't call the police when they find an obviously adult man with their minor child? How did CPS not already take this girl out of that household which allows her to be taken advantage of by adult men? How did the school not involve CPS when this minor began soliciting teachers with sex? This just reeks of fake.


DIOsexual_priest

I bet the comments of that post are going to be full of "let her do what she want! Stop being backwards" retardation


[deleted]

No they are not like that https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/comments/wwkblo/its_painful_being_a_father_in_this_day_and_age/ people want to do good and stop evil.


Embarrassed_Fox97

It’s easier to believe the “other” is a caricature as opposed to actually engaging honestly. People that make comments like that just want to believe it is a certain way because it reinforces some belief they have, and as long as that’s the case it doesn’t matter if reality backs it up or not.


man-i-hate-eggs

They yearn for unbounded freedom, and once it backfires they take a step back and see the damage and regret it. May allah guide them and us all.


DIOsexual_priest

This brings a smile to my face


BradBrady

Alhumdililah that’s so refreshing 🙏🏻


arsenal356

What do you mean, freely committing zina is a personal right, you shouldn’t have to care about the consequences and you’re oppressive and backwards if you disagree!!! /s


girlgirly

Honestly this isn’t the society problem but rather that he doesn’t know how to educate his daughter and instead wants to play the victim. The problem is also his wife who encourages this attitude. Instead of giving ultimatums to his wife and trying to educate or discipline his own daughter he is playing the victim. People don’t realise that being a father is a full time job and extremely difficult. You should truly think about it. At least the person admits his own mistakes. “I tried to give her as much freedom as she can get” and that was the mistake. It’s really common. People who grew up with liberal parents tend to be strict with their kids. People who grow up with strict parents tend to give too much freedom to their kids. That’s the problem when you have kids before you get over your daddy or mommy issues. You’re constantly comparing how you’re treating your kids to how your parents treated you. Instead of doing what’s better for the child.


Embarrassed_Fox97

Most sane comment in this thread, coincidentally also one of the least upvoted. A Lot of us don’t actually care about analysing the why or understanding the contrasting details of the situation, we’d rather just use this type of content as fuel to reinforce the idea that everything western is bad. I suppose the fact that we are Muslims only takes us so far and at the end of the day this is still Reddit where people will primarily engage in reactionary analysis of complex situations irrespective of the subreddit you’re in.


mermaidmd

Honestly, I pray to Allah that if I’m gonna have kids like this I’d rather not have kids at all. I dunno if it’s a sin to think this way…


Areeba_19

Idc about living in developed counteies lol Alhamdolillah developing countries and small towns are much better Alhamdolillah for being born in the east. Lol We neither have zina, feminism, red pill, etc. We at peace.


drywitforbrains

This sounds like some word porn lthat some man wrote about an imaginary daughter. I do not believe that this is real.


mcotter12

This is so fake. Incels drive themselves into a state of psychotic dissociation that they fuel with LARPs like this


Takver_

Exactly - she's 16 apparently, but has been pregnant multiple times? Has flown to Europe alone with friends multiple times? It sounds incredibly fake. Earns more than her dad (who is rich enough to send her on trips to Europe) through illicit means?


Kalgeris

Thank you. You are telling me he didn’t call the authorities on his sex trafficked daughter?


ThanosMyBananos

Whether it's real or fake, similar stuff to this happens, it has gone so backwards that disciplining your kids, not letting them date, stay out with friends late, drink ect will make you abuse/strict/controlling parent according to others.


Kalgeris

Yeah, he failed her. He can blame society all he wants. But he failed her. This feels fake also. But I won’t delve


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SleepingBlackberry

A child who acts out like this was likely sexually abused young and she probably needed therapy sooner... Before I converted I was the same as her but my parents didn't care


Sorrowshowls

Alhamdullilah, nice to hear you are better, may Allah always have us all on His straight path. Jazzakallah Khair!


Sawallin

The post is 100% fake.


PandorasActress

Look I don’t wanna be a downer but this does happen in some Muslim countries, well I can’t speak for all but it does happen in Saudi ofc not to this extent but yeah I think we’re gonna reach this stage pretty soon, it kinda become inevitable but I pray to god I die before the day islam truly degenerates


Fataha22

Nah, that not only happen at godless society Come here to my country, you must be surprise


cuddlyFeline867

Alhamdilillah for Islam..Every single day reddit makes me grateful for living in a Muslim country. I can't imagine raising kids in that sort of degeneracy.


Hubabbb96

This fool.deserves to hate himself, true waste of space


suleman_93

The worst fear of my life is to have kids like that


PuzzleheadedWolf5777

That’s what I’ve been saying


Noiseyeyeballs

Learn what the ego is. This is illusion. Don’t let it affect you. All religion is one. Islam is the most relevant religion until the doomsday


[deleted]

One of the biggest reasons I am a good person at all is because of Islam and religion, I've always thought to myself that I find didn't flllow religion I would do everything that has messed up the modern world


BriefOk7660

true but we shouldnt look down upon a society without Islam rather we bring islam to them with dawah


Faezan

I got chills reading this bro. May Allah protect us and our loved ones ameen.


Riddu1234

Sheesh


Cobalt74

b..but muh freedum!


BlizzardyB

I am shocked by the amount of people who say 'disown'. Has Allah SWT not ordained for us not to break family ties? And how is disowning going to help the girl straighten out her life? Disowning is only going to to push her more towards this sort of life. What a horrible advice to give!


grandpaofloops

A daughter becoming a prostitute is the worst thing that can happen to any parent and should not be encouraged for them to become one. May Allah help him.


Raz0612

He seems to be a person with depth of understanding & patience but both of these qualities are being exploited sadly, while he's being forcibly manipulated. This is why setting ground rules is important even before marriage. Never have kids with the wrong person.


althea1993

It's really saddening. Really2 sad. I know that nowadays sex is really easy to have in the first place with those social medias and dating apps. Moreover, it's so easy to have access in porn through these medias. Im Asian and live in Germany and more or less this weltern culture (in the name of freedom/liberty) leads me to also lose my control. They act like animals and so do my x husband. Personally I dont know why do young generation nowadays are really 'sick' and hard to be taught about the truth and whats good actually for the society


Anon20411

That's why despite their flaws I think christian conservatives in the west are the only sane people left in the west at least they have morals and aren't afraid to conform to them.


akskinny527

I find the comments saying disown her and disappear so weird. Since when is that endorsed in Islam? 🙁 That's your kid... your utmost desire and goal would be for her to return to the Straight Path, to Allah. How would disowning and abandoning her (at 16 🤦‍♀️) accomplish that? Ya'll would CREATE a God-less society with some of your takes. Most teens experience recklessness and a desire to act upon it... it's a part of puberty. As a Muslim and as a parent, your job is to always redirect back to Allah. Also, how many of ya'll would be tooting the same horn if it was a boy? I've seen so many threads about a male struggling with alcohol or zina and the comments are so supportive. The same thread with a female struggling with hijab and the comments are all about 'lIbErAl fEmInisT'. This happens irl too... men struggling with alcohol or zina aren't shunned like a female who might be struggling with the same. I'm appalled at the obvious disparity between how Muslim males and Muslim females are treated. It's the same cultural issues propagated forward despite Islam telling us piety is all that matters. Each sin is equal on a human being... males won't be judged less harshly nor will females.


ThanosMyBananos

>Also, how many of ya'll would be tooting the same horn if it was a boy? If it was a boy sleeping around getting many girls pregnant, I think the people saying they would disown or leave would say the same thing (maybe even worse, get violent/physical with him). Though I agree we should always try and guide kids to the right path, even I have to admit there comes a time when you have to leave it up to Allah swt because they're too far gone for you to have any impact on them. Like this girl idek may Allah guide her to Islam but she straight up dips and leaves the house at times for trips and brings guys to sleep with in the house, then threatens to call cps if you try anything. I wouldn't blame anyone who would give up as a parent, and wouldn't allow her to do that in the house/leave, though I would try other options before that personally. I also agree that people who are hypocritical in they're empathy to sisters are gross, you should be kind when guiding or helping a struggling Muslim whether it's dealing with hijab or an alcohol addiction.


anisah123

Was looking for this comment thank you, a honest and human take. Was so disappointed at the pride of ‘Muslim men’ saying they’ll disown their teenage daughter and what kick her out of the house so she can learn her lesson …. By what exposing her to more harm. And let her be homeless at age 16 ? Children didn’t ask to be born in this earth, it’s your job as parents to help them through the good the bad and the ugly


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akskinny527

How do you equate "not kicking out your kid" to "you're ok with watching them commit zina everyday"? Not kicking your kid out doesn't mean you stop prpviding examples of goodness, praying, commanding your child to pray, having open dialogue with your kid about their incorrect behavior. Your personal discomfort doesn't trump the command of Allah and the Prophet (saww)... of not severing ties of kinship. Also, logically, what an idiotic move... so your kid is sinning and rather than provide a consistent example of Allah's message in your home for your sinning child to continally see and perhaps change their heart... you would say "screw you" and kick them out into the open arms of sinful people? 🙁 Yeah, that's surely going to straighten her out! The Muslim world has forgotten the ethics of deen completely... think of the Seerah and the patience of not only the Prophet (saww) but of many of the sahaba. Their patience with their parents, kids, uncles, aunts etc. Idk if you're a parent, but raising kids isn't a black and white issue nor does parenting suddenly stop when your kid hits puberty. There are so many times you WILL lose patience but your job, your responsibility as a parent is to instill Islamic values consistently. Even when you have adult children, you are STILL their parent and they will look to you many times in their life for advice/comfort/direction.


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akskinny527

>I find it interesting you bring Allahs command into this, you are aware of what Allah commands to do to someone like this right?? Lashing? Stoning? What? Do you live under a khilafa established in the way of Allah? Is there a qadi who brings down some sort of punishment for you to carry out? Have you and 4 other righteous witnesses witnessd as 'a needle going into a thread' the act in consideration? Unless someone's kid is making literal pornography, i doubt shariah punishment would be applicable. >Where talking about a daughter being a literal PROSTITUTE. This is not a normal circumstance. If my child drinks, smokes, steals, I will not kick her/him out. But as soon as I find out she’s being a wh*re or my son is being playboy. I’m gonna try my best to do whatever I can up to a limit. If they still don’t fix themselves. They have to leave. If your kid turns to literal prostitution as a 'hobby' - i'm sure ine needs to glance at their own actions as a parent. The OP who made the post lamenting his situation is not innocent in this scenario... bcos like i said, people who have kids KNOW how impactful a meaningful and healthy relationship is with a child. On the flip side, a toxic relationship ruins kids as well. At the end of the day, i have faith in Allah and His Commandments... the right way will ALWAYS appeal. And if it doesn't, if my kid continues to be a POS, at least i know when i die.. i did my best as Allah commanded of me when he entrusted me with a responsibility.


alwxcanhk

Ok the story is touching but the headline is not related. I am a Muslim before you think I’m not. But… You mean to say that if there was a society where no one believes in God then families won’t have any morals and all will be doing like “what the story tells?” … I doubt very much. The story is a “single” event similar to many bad things that happen in societies where the majority supposedly believe in God. Also a Godless Society doesn’t exist actually because in most societies, people are free to believe or not believe so long they follow the laws.


Sobdo

Just because people identify with a religious label doesn't mean they actually follow the religion. Sins occur when people forget God.


alwxcanhk

Exactly.


swinging_yorker

In a godless society, morals are left to the society and the morals degrade over time. Within the last 30 years we've seen the mainstream-ing of the LGBT, the transitioning into genders (which really wouldve been considered as a mental illness just 10 years ago), and regular people doing sex work via platforms such as only fans. There are also some people - and growing in number - that are okay with sex with animals and pedophila. In Islam, the morals are set in stone. They don't degrade because they are unchanging and rigid.


alwxcanhk

First of all: Islam is a religion, not a society. A message from God with rules. Other religions such as Christianity have even more severe punishments for the same things and more. Morals existed before religions came. Gods morals are enshrined within us. Now you feel that within the last 30 years…. This and that happened. This is not true. You just know about it because of advancement in communication. Relationships (between similar sex) & prostitution existed before, during & after Islam in all societies; Godly or not. And will continue to exist till the day of judgement. There are many poems from Arabia during the Islamic Empires about the beauty of young boys and that they’re even better (for sex) then girls. Finally I don’t really know what you are trying to say. What is a Godly society? Like who? Does it exist? Are you trying to say that a Muslim country is better than … USA for example? No they’re not. Our societies (Muslim countries) are way more backward and corrupt. This is the truth. A lot of work is needed and this is way more important than trying to glorify our societies by lashing on others who are actually better than us.


padman531

He doesn't say he's atheist...


Hezha98

It doesn't matter. The father doesn't have any power. The government and the society are, his wife also.


all_you_need_is_sabr

Is this really the right sub to post this… 😑


Ty1an

not sure what this has to do with islam also just because the saudi’s corrupt version of sharia isn’t implimented doesn’t mean western society is “godless” go outside. half of western politicians are religious zealots.


TheGhostOfYamato

lmao that's the "sexual freedom" a lot of Redditors want


couscous_

This is also part of the "strong independent women" feminist drivel they keep spewing.


Bmore_legend86

Divorce her brother.


H_alcyon

It’s not him. He took a screenshot of someone else’s post.


ebonymuslima

It happens in every community muslim and non muslim. lmaooo why downvote me for stating the truth?doesn't it happen in muslim homes?are we hypocrites now?😂😂😂😂


49Billion

It totally does. I’m a psychiatric nurse and I see it with Muslims all the time. I think most people commenting here would be actually more prone to this happening to them based on their lack of empathizing with modern life stressors and influences creating a very early disconnect with the child. Personality disorders are more often than not rooted in trauma and a dysfunctional family dynamic.


dodges1010

That's why you don't marry a women with a dirty past. she won't raise your daughters right.