Idk if this counts but my sister is an istp. We either barely text or we'll spam to annoying the shit out of each other. Shes generally uninterested in doing anything. If we do have a planned hangout, its most likely shopping for useless things and gossiping. Im pretty sure her affection is more like "i hate you" kinda way. She is so bad at texting and answering calls. If she didnt want to be friends with you, she would just say so in the non-nicest way possible. Its also can be quite hard to hang out with them, almost everything is boring. Cafe? Boring. Cinemas? Boring. Picnic? Boring. It needs to be entertaining for someone with a short attention span. But also, if they dont know you well enough, they wont go to great lengths to see you. Too much effort. My advice? What youve got is good right now. They care enough to message after a month of not answering. It means something. My prediction is that something will come up and theyll just drag you along Edit: I didnt read your whole post. DROP. THEM. Why have you been doing this to yourself for 6 YEARS?? Ignore everything I said, it doesnt count if they dont even care about you. Seems like they get bored easily, ignore you and decide they want to be entertained again. In the nicest way possible, please stop being a doormat. Thats like our weakest point


I've never been close to ISTPs so I absolutely don't know what's happening. Have you tried asking the ISTP sub ?


Eh idk how that would go. Considering the amount of relationship posts that sub get daily, I can imagine how tiring it gets from them.


Ah Fe parent worrying about their comfort 😆. You have nothing to lose posting there, the worst would be your post being ignored.


Lol true


I have an ISTP friend who lives far away from me. We studied together at middle school, and in the end he had to move out with his family. 3 or 4 years later, short after I entered university, he replied a status I posted at whatsapp and we've been chatting sometimes ever since, watching movies/series together in call, and things like that. For reference I'm on my fourth year at university, so we've been talking again for three years. Sometimes we go months without talking but we try to do things together (online) at vacation and talk about the new things in our life every now and then. Usually he's the one who texts me first. I don't know why he takes the effort to keep this friendship but I do my part too and it works. He's funny and interesting, so it's nice to be friends with him.


One of my best friends is an ISTP! Started off as college roommates and grew from there. Going like 12 years strong now.


Sounds EXACTLY like my istp cousin. Read all the texts but doesn’t respond then comes back a few weeks to months later with a random video or meme.. sigh I no longer talk about my life or ask about his as much anymore since he doesn’t say anything anyway..


my bf is istp and we started as friends (friendship of 1.5 years). i never thought we'd get close because he was like what u described. tbh they sorta just do whatever they want and don't often commit to plans too early unless it's super important. with my bf, we got close because i was often going along with his whims (eg hang out, do an activity, etc); but what made it easy was that i live very close to him. as a friend, he did really annoying things like ask me to hang out outside last minute, then 10 mins later decided it was too bright so said he's gonna take a nap instead. basically, if they get a good idea, they usually act on it quickly. sooo.... sometimes they might reach out on a whim coz they were thinking about you, then they don't carry it through because they became uninterested or distracted, or they lack the skills to carry through with it. with my bf, and another istp friend, they can be pretty passive in conversation and people things due to inferior Fe; they often don't know what to say. even if i send them funny things, they usually just chuckle to themselves and don't reciprocate the interaction because they think they don't have anything good to say. they keep a lot inside their head. and may have tendency to avoid people or keep relationships/conversations to a bare minimum so they don't need to Fe. HOWEVER, my experience is that bonding with istps often happens through shared activities and hobbies (due to their Se), and sometimes conversations but mostly if they're oriented towards figuring stuff out or sorting out some logical line of thought (with a goal towards a result). they're also quite happy just listening to you talking about yourself, while not saying anything. they don't tend to engage in lengthy, open-ended, random conversations that don't have a clear goal to be achieved. ADDITIONALLY, it helps to just be straightforward to say you're confused by a particular behaviour and ask them to explain themselves. the answer could be very simple, they might just be unaware of what they're doing or how they affect other people. due to Ti dom, they're less likely to take these confrontations personally (if you're nice but direct about it).