T O P
Bubbatino

No clue. I spend all my time playing fantasy football


GloriaToo

Just dive right in.


likwidfuzion

As Adam Levitan puts it, we are all just Stat Sheet Virgins.


butth0lez

Wait is that not how you spell muffed kicks or whatever?


dshmitty

Muff is another word for pussy lmao this cracked me up


Kuntheman

I was just as baffled until I read this explanation Apparently I live under a rock because everyone else seems to get it, and there’s no way everyone here is getting it if you know what I mean


ddh85

You gotta ask [Mingey](https://youtu.be/AKIqjsG2W1k).


JexFraequin

What like a cat?


Mendelevlum

Im glad I wasnt the only one who initially thought muffed kick though lol, don’t really hear the word often enough in that context


g0dzilllla

I’ve never experienced a muff, not sure how it would affect me


itsgucci060

I’d say it’s a thing worth experiencing


Xantis281

Next mod right here!


xnachtmahrx

They can ruin your life my man


Dcarl010

Mods, leave it


roarinboar

He's gotta learn eventually right?


mrgraybit

Not in my Christian Subreddit!


Xantis281

You leave our lord and PPR savior McCaffrey out of this, good sir!


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murso74

Right in front of my salad?


Ctownkyle23

How am I supposed to explain this to my kids?


HelpfulLime3856

Prepare yourself for the *60 Year Old Virgin* Somebody's gotta fuck him eventually. Right??


HighBeta21

Butt fumbled.


parker0215

Is that the sequel?


TheIllusiveGuy

This has to go in the /r/fantasyfootball HoF alongside throwing a football in a parking lot and posting for relationship advice.


goochjp

What is this if not posting for relationship advice?


Known_Coat6257

Link to the 2nd one?


TheIllusiveGuy

https://old.reddit.com/r/fantasyfootball/comments/79vdku/am_i_24m_overreacting_or_is_this_enough_reason_to/ It's the top post of all time. The next 7 or so are either about Josh Gordon or AB.


Known_Coat6257

Amazing, thanks!


likwidfuzion

My favorite part of revisiting old threads are the names of players I haven’t seen in a while and/or players with a different value today (e.g. OP labeling his girlfriend as the “Stefon Diggs of girlfriends”)


Wembanyanna

Damn it's been 5 years already since that where the fuck has the time gone


carame1cream

Where’s the first one?


TheIllusiveGuy

https://www.reddit.com/r/fantasyfootball/comments/e11zyn/do_not_play_dak_foxborough_is_freezing_pouring/


brrduck

I only know what a Nor'Easter is because of the book "the perfect storm". Other than that book i hate everything about Massachusetts particularly the people from there.


Dashizz6357

And that post that was long and super detailed about the weather implications for a game. And everyone was just like uh, they’re playing in a dome. Lol


Caps4life77

The more you fuck around ...


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TuaTurnsdaballova

Let the boy watch.


COD_Daddy

He needs to learn


cjmh23

I’m absolutely fucking dead from this comment lmao


zirtbow

This is going to be an all time post isnt tit?


[deleted]

Nobody really knows but their power is immense


Cinephile1998

All my stupidest decisions happened because of muffs


ShockAndAwe415

Mine, too. But, there was usually a lot of liquor involved also...


Cinephile1998

Unironically I don't drink that much. Only time I regularly drank alcohol was because of a muff-haver who partied a lot


Sauce_Is_Secret

"a muff-haver" 💀


Nicetrybozo

Weed for me 😂🤷🏾‍♂️🤦🏾‍♂️


danrod17

I’m in the middle of planning to move across the country and this little voice in my head is telling me that it’s going to be a top 5 dumb thing I’ve ever done. I’m pretty sure it’s fine though. What could go wrong?


Cinephile1998

I almost moved to another country bro


OmnioculusConquerer

I was driving one time and I thought to myself, “hey it’s a full sun today!”


thurrmanmerman

Wow, that's rough.


lotr_ginger

OP shouldn't worry though. The fumble won't affect him until 9 months from now


Lil_oscar

Unfortunately there was a break down in the protection and it just squirted right out.


shmishshmorshin

No one knows what it means, but it’s provocative.


SteveHarveysFace

I dunno, but I'd suspect Jimmy Garoppolo leads the league in them


FadedTony

Did you see him in that suit? Master of Muffets


Jamies_awesome_rack

Just don't pull those strings.


sophrosynos

Thought it was Gardner Minshew.


johnsonandjohnson7

This is Reddit. No one knows


OptimusGrime707

You know, when you, like, you grab a woman's breast and it's... and you feel it and... it feels like a bag of sand when you're touching it.


boahyeah

Wait, are you a virgin?


misaliase1

This is Reddit.


MasterPong

No, this is Patrick.


boahyeah

Actually, THIS IS SPARTA!!!!


OmnioculusConquerer

I just got a little messy


oldhoekoo

you've never been to r/muff ?


I_HATE_GOLD_

Zach Wilson is the #1 QB in my points per muff league. I’d try to see if you can send a package deal.


complete_your_task

For starting QBs sure. But Gardner Minshew actually has the highest muff % in the league when you look at it as a hole.


Dakar-A

Worth considering that Jimmy G's Muff DVOA is miles ahead of those two and statistically he's much more likely to land in the muff on a given week.


browndude10

>package deal.


notfromsoftemployee

Milf muff must score triple.


Quackerbarrels

This should be fun to watch


parker0215

Tbh it's a dark horse for most-upvoted post all-time on this sub lol. Only thing holding it down is he dropped it at the worst possible time, late night EST


pumperthruster

Nothing can beat the guy accidentally posting about relationship advice


thomasmurray1

The weather report on US bank stadium post was also a historic r/FF moment.


parker0215

I remember the line from that post that essentially said "every time this player has scored 2 TDs, he's followed it up with another 2 TD game", which implies a never-ending chain of 2 TD games stretching into infinity lol [Think this one gets overlooked too] (https://www.reddit.com/r/fantasyfootball/comments/di0tr0/what_are_some_things_you_do_while_waiting_for)


colonelforbin91

Hilarious that the link in your post is still completely relevant, three years later.


BorneFree

Price of the brick goin up is up there as well


IAmTheWaller67

The guy who correctly predicted the rise of Latavius Murray out of thin air was a fun one.


parker0215

Yeah, that post should be in the Library of Congress lol


DawgBro

The replies that actually give proper relationship advice in fantasy football terms are great.


LeftHandedFapper

Better than in the relationship subs


Jaazeps

Even a lot of the joke replies were better than the legit advice in the relationship subs


edub1783

Whoa can you link it?


parker0215

You can just sort by top posts all time lol I hope you like Josh Gordon and AB


pumperthruster

https://www.reddit.com/r/fantasyfootball/comments/79vdku/am_i_24m_overreacting_or_is_this_enough_reason_to/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf


oldhoekoo

got damn I've been here for five years also thank you for this


Dustin_Echoes_UNSC

Dropped it at the worst possible time? So... He "muffed" it?


oldhoekoo

no new posts till tomorrow. we need everybody to see this in the morning


sophrosynos

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


alcashmoney

You should ask your parents about that.


SirPotterOfHogwarts

Nobody knows, but it's provocative


Scope003

It really gets the people goin’


MWM031089

You see son, when a man loves a woman


EvilSporkOfDeath

Can't keep his mind on nothing else.


Economy_Price_5295

He'd trade the world For the good thing he's found


nilgiri

Not in my league. No trades ever. No buy highs, no sell lows.


Noviante

Thought this was r/relationshipadvice for a minute there


SafariFlapsInBack

The highest rated post of all time here was accidental relationship advice.


LooseBoysenberry7

I am intimately familiar with how muffs work, just ask your mom


Drey5000

Zach Wilson?


HyruleJedi

Not to defend him or anything but no way this is his ACCOUNTability talking


dorf5222

Zach Wilson avgs 2.77” per play so this dudes mom better hope he knows his way around a muff dive


itsgucci060

It’s never awkward asking your mom how muffs work. OP should go ahead


Deathwishrok

Muffed punts aren't forced fumbles so I don't think they would get a point unless the defense recovered it


Caliguy331

Something tells me you’ll be the only person to actually answer this question 😂


Levitlame

Thank you for answering the question.


Odd-Wheel

These replies make me want to leave Reddit. Like, it’s not even one of those “accidentally posted an innocent question in a sex subreddit” posts. Literally everyone here is just giggling at the word muff and *trying* to make clever quips referencing vaginas.


bmf09598

Somebody made some jokes. Time to leave Reddit because I can't handle them


BlackJpow

Why would anyone come to this subreddit to have fun? This is Fantasy Football! It is a serious matter!!


MorningNapalm

HOW DARE YOU BRING PUNS INTO MY MAKE BELIEVE SPORT!


crazycroat16

Damn bro, why do you wanna see conversation muffled


Ongo_Gablogian

This website just might not be for you.


Accomplished-Tone971

...or maybe yall are just the future of the cringe sub content. 420 69 hahaha nice bro!


DaJared

Theoretically yes. However most apps, like sleeper, consider all fumbles “forced fumbles”. I did a stupid amount of research on this one night before the season.


DoctorJunkenstein

A muff is not classified as a fumble at all. No possession was established.


DaJared

Oh, you know what, that's correct. My mistake. If possession is established then what I said above applies.


murso74

Stop punting muffs please


thisonesforharambe

Sit down son, we need to have a discussion.


[deleted]

Dive into em


ohmanilovethissong

You don't get any points but you tell all your friends that you did. If they're good friends they'll pretend to believe you.


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Pdxfunjunkie

I've heard some players are awarded extra points for muff diving, but that is too advanced for me.


DAB12AC

I quickly read the title and thought “you know, that’s a good question. Does it count as a fumble?” And then I saw all the awards the post got and said “wait a minute…”


davidsbeast1

Muff cabbage


ShockAndAwe415

Agree, but, then again, I've never been to Jersey.


hpdodo84

It's just... it's just a Jersey thing


Bengalblaine

Nice muff


OnlyHereForPKGo

If I knew, I wouldn’t be single.


GrizzlyIsland22

According to South Park, slap the titties around a bit, then stick it in 'er and pee


locksmith25

Your lineup needs to be meatier if it's getting ruined by a single muff


andywebster23

You’d be surprised how powerful a single muff can be


FlankSteakerson

Rumor has it storks are involved


blizzacane85

Uncle Junior’s in the muff


isuzurodeo

Nephew.


ASTRUNSKY

I too would like to know if my team not only gets credit for the muff but also for muff diving.


Holymuffdiver9

Finally, it's my time to shine.


Drey5000

Russell Wilson?


-PM_ME_A_SECRET-

No chance Russ calls it a muff. You just know he calls it a love flower or lady garden.


unverified_email

🤢 Thanks buddy.


queefIatina

Hardest I’ve laughed in a minute ngl


Via590

Big muff.


NinoZachetti

Super fuzz...


Salty_Simmer_Sauce

Excuse me?


cjmh23

You just made me spit out my water laughing


4321readysetgo

You stick it in and out and in and out and in and out. And then you repeat. And repeat and repeat. Don’t fumble in the end zone.


ShockAndAwe415

Or celebrate too early...


Caliguy331

Definitely don’t do anything to get called for unsportsmanlike conduct. Taunting is fair game though


B_Fee

And then he smells the end zone again, he's out scoring touchdowns. Then he's back to the locker room for some more full penetration. Smells end zone. Back to the locker room, full penetration. Touchdowns. Penetration. Touchdowns. Full penetration. Touchdowns. Penetration. And this goes on and on and back and forth for 60 or so minutes until the game just sort of ends.


JexFraequin

Oh fuck I’m gonna fucking fumble.


apocalypse31

As always, depends on your league. In deeper leagues, scoring can work totally different, making D more important to hold. The most important part in game, though, is good coverage. You really can't afford a momentum shift late in the game as defense gets worn and running it up the middle in the C gap becomes easier, especially in inclement conditions.


DoctorJunkenstein

No league will count a muff as a fumble.


Cinephile1998

I'm just commenting so I can find myself in a year when this is the most upvoted post all time


Duderino619

Muffs had their heyday in the 80s. You were born too late, son.


c0dizzl3

No one knows what it means, but it’s provocative… it gets the people going!


countcraig

*Sir, this is a Wendy's*


thomasmurray1

Are we really not doing phrasing anymore?


Worm_Farmer

I have successfully procreated and I still don’t have a complete grasp of how muffs work and the power they have over us.


JexFraequin

Hey look at mister big time procreating over here


Worm_Farmer

Caught that humble-brag, there, didn’t you?


earthvsmatt

If you find the muff let us know


Snelly__

Idk but suddenly I don’t wanna play fantasy football anymore


I_eat_mud_

Idk do I look like a mechanic to you?


Gizzledickle

Typically a muff will get you some positives but they have been shown to lead down a negative path as well. I’d probably defer this to someone with muff experience


Fucktrump5

Giggity


Bean_Breaking_Out

You ain't seen nothin till you're down cuz a muffin  means you won't see a change in your score.


MrJusticeWargrave

Uncle June’s in the muff.


TheMuffRyders

PM me OP, I will help explain in great detail.


JZG0313

First ballot hall of fame post on this sub (To genuinely answer your question though I don’t think a muffed punt would count as a special teams forced fumble since it wasn’t actually forced by someone? A special teams forced fumble in my mind is a guy punches the ball out during the return)


Caps4life77

Contrary to popular believe, the word muff is not associated with hair at all. Instead, the word "muff" is an inoffensive, slang word for a vagina. Muffs can range from dainty and tight to floppy and roast beef colored. Some muffs smell fishy or sweaty, and others smell like skin or roses. Some muffs are hairy, others are bare, and some have razor burn or ingrown hairs. Females (and transexuals) of all ages have muffs. There are baby muffs and grandma muffs. Most muffs have a week of bleeding, unless the owner is on some sort of contraceptive (see: Depovera, Seasonal). It is also the root word for Muffdiver, Muffed, and Muffdoctor. Jan decided to go on birth control because the muffdoctor said that it would prevent pregnancy, cramping, and that weird smell coming from her muff.


Montana_Mike69

Usually you have to pay the stripper extra for muff talk.


draxlaugh

a muff counted as a fumble for a gambling parlay i had, but the key word here might be "forced" fumble


Sloth_Dream-King

Is this some sort of "birds and the bees" question?


iLerntMyLesson

Nice


Deepfriedwhale

Someday we’ll figure it out


agelessandevergreen

Bubblegum ice cream?!


WarrenAlaCarte

Weird flex, but okay.


Offone111

Muff will be running for President in 2024


itzpiiz

For me they usually catch me by surprise and ruin the mood


bunderchod

No muff is too tough


Kachow-95

Typically it only counts if the player dives into it.


asst3rblasster

you can't just blitz the muff. You have to finesse it so you can get the play off, if you're in the backfield you've gone too far


CuriousAndMysterious

Usually there are a bunch of guys trying to get on top of it


Stag328

I give muffs +6 in my league.


BreadBox36

You put em on your ears so they don't get cold.


cjmh23

Do you have any idea what you’ve done to yourself by posting this OP? Lmfao


sharinganrules

Ask Zach Wilson


Elegant_Spot_3486

I just put them around my head to keep my ears warm.


Canadoc

Are you Talking football?


Senior_Raisin5875

I've fumbled the muff a few times and now I've got 4 kids!


IFiguredUOut

Now, don't go getting soft on me this summer. You know, you're sitting around the pool all day, chasing the muff around.


RockiestRaccoon

An age old question that we've been trying to figure out for centuries...


Knee_Deep_In_Muff

I believe I can help


GrizzlyIsland22

I think if your team forces a muffin and recovers, you get points for a fumble recovery. If your team drops the ball and recovers, should be nothing happens


IWasHappyUnhappy

Let's dispell the notion that /u/Mustard_Jam doesn't know what he's doing. He knows exactly what he's doing.


itsgucci060

A forced fumble means you have to force it with physical contact. You can’t force a muff, just ask Harvey Weinstein.


Jams265775

11/22/22 is the day that r/fantasyfootball peaked, we can close the sub now


COD_Daddy

Man, maybe I know muff better than I thought. All of a sudden my wife said we have a baby on the way… so, maybe I can help?