Weird being a virgin at 22?
By - Legitimate_Class6917
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Shhhht stop this don't reveal ours secret
I’m not ashamed to admit it only when the topic comes up but I still haven’t had sex yet and I’m turning 25 on the 20th. At 22, it’s uncommon but not weird; I had quite a few friends at that age who still hadn’t done it yet. Comparison is the thief of happiness.
What do you expect, it's going to become more common as people are now more insular than ever. I'm 24 almost 25 and have only been on 3 dates. I was on a coed sports team in college, I did a year long national service program. Nothing.
And yet women don't want us to ask them out in public places, depending on who you ask it could be from the park to the grocery store. Online dating is a rapacious, for-profit casino that is nothing but a waste of time.
So I've tried hobbies, I've tried volunteering, now I have to try cold approaches. It's no wonder we have so many messed up and mentally ill people in society today. We are told what we "can't" do and not given any opportunities to socialize with new groups. Meetup is filled with 30, 40 and 50 year olds. Bars and clubs don't have serious women in them. I can go on and on. Like someone said in another post, these apps do nothing but gatekeep women behind them and charge men for the ability (in many cases) to even talk to them. This isn't how my parents met.
Regardless, I still like to hold on to hope that it’ll happen someday.
It will, don't worry.
A woman doesn't need to be serious to have sex. Worry about hanging out and having fun with women. Be honest about your intentions, especially sexually. Some women will shame you and react badly. Some will respect you and be enamored by your candor. Fortune favors the bold.
From my experience, it’s hard to find the courage to be bold when going on a 100% rejection streak. It doesn’t do well for your self-esteem.
It is hard. I get it. I'm older and found myself single after a 25+ year marriage ended by my wife cheating and leaving me for him. I had negative self esteem. 5 years (and a few dry periods) later, and I'm doing great by all dating metrics. It was hard work, but now I'm reaping the rewards, just like with most endeavors in life. Do not be discouraged. Post pandemic dating is going to be full of opportunity.
This was what I discovered after getting divorced in my early 40s. Dating is so much easier than in my teens and 20s
I feel like it's probably more common than you might think. It just seems like everyone loses their virginity young because the people that haven't don't exactly advertise that they haven't yet whereas those that have do so you only ever hear the ones that have lost it talk about it
28m virgin here my lad. I wouldn't worry about it at all, just remember that you have your first time when you feel ready to do so. No earlier and no later (hopefully) so don't let anyone pressure you into it
How do you feel about being a virgin at that age? Any ups & downs?
Up until last year I've been perfectly fine with it. Just been more focused on sorting my life out since 2014 when I got medically discharged from the Army. But when the lockdowns started, I found myself thinking a lot about how I've led my life so far and it just felt like I was being hit in the face with a brick nearly everyday.
I haven't really been interested in having sex as I'd much rather do it with someone who I was in a relationship with instead of one night stands or FWB.
But because I've been single since I was 14, I am starting to worry if I'll ever get with someone and get round to doing it. Being single for this long is getting to me a lot more than being a virgin. But I've just been telling myself all these years that I'm still not ready yet despite wanting to change it.
Though I'm a female, I wish like HELL I waited. I think you're perfectly fine being a virgin. However, I have encountered so many people, Male and female that are so wrapped up in sex that they missed the very essence of relationship and getting to know people. I've met people who would like and cheat to have sex than to organically get to know someone, then move on to the next. Now I'm not saying something is wrong with that IF that's YOUR thing. But I think some people do let it blind them... like a drug. +I literally have a friend who is so blinded by it from a guy, she ignores everything he does wrong. She says his sex is like a drug that she knows she's not going to get anywhere else.
Just my opinion.
Some people will never have sex
30+ and still… so don’t worry.
no. everyone is different. everyone's life experience is different.
I’m a virgin. Mainly cause I’m waiting. I’m 23 female. Last year I dated a guy that’s not a virgin but said he was now wanting to wait. Which wasn’t true.
But you aren’t alone.
If you are a virgin cause you are waiting be sure to talk about the boundaries in the relationship , but if not , that’s good too!
29 yo virgin here. Stop worrying about this lmao
Not sure if I agree with this. If you mean don't fault yourself, I agree. If you mean don't work on it, I disagree.
100% agree with you.
I feel it's good that a person especially a male starts thinking about love/intimacy more in their 20s or else you're going to have a huge chip on your shoulder later on in life about not having the experiences which will make you feel defeated.
Just being real as Redditors tend to be too nice and unreal but in the real world a lot of women will see that as a red flag in a guy that is a virgin especially in late 20s and later in life. They want to feel satisfied and can trust you without having to teach you at that age group.
I know about it.
22 is a great age for you to start thinking about it.
If it ever comes down to it and you feel the need to get it out of the way, there's a few "ranches" about an hour outside of Vegas. I'm sure one of those lovely ladies would help. It's regulated and the ladies are tested regularly.
To be honest, yeah, it's unusually late unless you're very religious or something.
That doesn't mean you're a bad or failed person, it is what it is. Nothing wrong with being a late bloomer.
I feel like for me it’s been a combination of depression, social anxiety and just not being able to find the right person to do it with
I didn't until I was 20.
I lost my virginity to my now husband at age 26… You’ve got nothing to be ashamed of. Imo I think it’s more common than we think.
its not weird broh ppl move at their own pace which is fine no harm in tht plus some wahman think its attractive tht ur a virgin so theres tht
Hell no, Keep your Virgintity!!!! In my Madea voice!!
Nope. I didn’t go on my first date till I was a junior in college, 21. Virginity was gone soon after that date.
Not weird at all. My advice is be careful with who you sleep with because there are some crazies out there
I'm 25 and I'm a virgin as well. If it makes you feel better, I've never had my first kiss, or first date either (yeah, I'm pretty unlucky in the dating world). Maybe we win some sort of prize? 😅
Becoming more and more common. Not weird
I lost my virginity a year ago and I am 29
Also don't lose it just to lose it like I did,you'll regret it.
It's like warm apple pie
It's not. I'm 24 F, have ever been dating for only once before. And I'm a virgin.
Know what, several times in my life, I’ve looked back and considered how much trouble and heartache I could have spared myself from if I’d have just done like I was taught. To save myself for the right girl that I married. There is absolutely no shame in being a virgin. Truth be known, there are a lot of young people that wish they could be again.
OP it's not uncommon now to be a virgin. Some people lose it in their teens and some don't. There is nothing wrong with you. I'm 25 and I'm a virgin as well. Nothing weird about being a virgin past your teens.
Lol 22, it's fine. I lost at 23, you still have chance
Lol! If you feel weird being a virgin at 22, I would be an alien to you. I'm 30, a virgin and have had no relationships. There. Hope that made you feel better. 🙂
I lost mine when I was 18, and felt old too. The thing is I did it with a girl I wasn't too attracted to. Must of the times I've done it at this point of my life have not been with a girl a really really like, and never with a gf. So if a were you, I think I'd feel prolly weird but if that meant to do it with a girl I loved then to me it'd be fine.
Always do it because you love it and because you are horny with the one you love haha
How will losing your virginity will affect your life? Like for real? I'm 22, I'm virgin. Do I freak out bc of it? No...
I lost mine at 18 (22 now), seeing a guy that lost his at 20 (He also has a friend who is 23, like you has dated many girls, he is also a virgin) - it's completely normal. It's not something to rush into and it certainly isn't something to feel bad about :)
It certainly is a concern for men. Wont be able to stop thinking about it.
I can guarantee once you lose your virginity the first thought you will have is "...really? That's what all the fuss was about?"
Its way overhyped in the media and by society
Pretty sure a guy would be like "yes!!! I did it!! Wooohoooo!!!!" Kind of surprised by your reply. women choose to lose virginity because of the hype in media and society? Maybe it depends from person to person.
Every guy I've met has had the exact same reaction as me lmao
yea it is but i’m curious about almost you guys often use with condom or without condom. anyway I’ve had sex yet so 😂
Are you asking if I have sex with protection? ...Yes? It's incrediblely stupid to have unprotected sex, I thought that was well known?
Yes…Ohhh got it 😉
I don’t think it’s weird at all, but it is uncommon. My girlfriend and I are in our 40s and we are sexually adventurous. We come up with fantasies and try to fulfill them. About five months ago we crossed one off the list that I never thought would actually happen. We found a 21 year old virgin and he lost his virginity to my girlfriend. I was showing him what to do, and then he would do it. We showed him proper foreplay, what “not“ to do, and we kept it very lighthearted and fun. He was nervous at first but really had a good time. We left out some of the more intimate things like kissing. On the one hand, I feel like we gave him some great tips and dispelled some of the nervousness that he had about the idea of sex. However, there is something about losing your virginity to someone that you have feelings for that he did not get to experience. Oh he was actively looking to lose his virginity in this manner, so he was going to do it with or without us, and we made sure he had a really good time. To answer your question though, yes there are plenty of people out there like you. I can’t say that I recommend losing your virginity in the method I just described, because I can’t speak to the intentions of the person(s) you are with (you don’t want to be treated as some sex toy or novelty). I can say that many people, if not most, would say that their first time was either unpleasant or unfulfilling. Waiting until it feels “right“ is a good idea. And no, we are not available to any more virgins out there🤣
I used to be and I'm a girl absolutely normal 100% and alot of women will actually appreciate it if it's intentional
Stay a virgin and you will survive the Rapture. Then in the next version of Earth you will be given 49 wives!
Na, 26 here and I could lose it soon.
Two years ago I almost did it but she was just using me as sexual toy. That time I understood that since I still have it I want to keep it until I found some one worthy.
Now I have some one I like a lot and we are gona really slow, so, it doesn't matter if that relationship don't work and we had sex. This time whenever i think we could make it, i feel pretty happy in a way last time can't never compare.
Same! The guy I dated last year was using me. He told me he was waiting but made it clear he wanted sex. (Was always telling me he was horny or goes home and does it himself after we spend time together etc ) He claims that he never wanted to do it with me ( he was talking to my friend but he didn’t know who he was talking to)
Waiting to do it with someone who you find special is important!
There’s no weird there’s only you. Do it your way on your time. It’s yummy though. Don’t wait too long. 😂
Gotta work on it you don’t want to be 30 and still a virgin even though 22 is a little up there
hit up /r/virgin your kind
It ain't weird.
Most people like that don’t have any social skills or they’re afraid their peepee is too small. Doesn’t seem like you don’t have social skills since you’ve dated in the past… what’s the issue here?
There are a thousands reasons other than not having social skills. Being busy with other stuff and so on.
Oh yes. Must have been dying under the weight of your 12 hour shifts as a doctor at 17 years old. So busy, ya couldn’t go play mini golf on a Saturday!
There are definitely different circumstances. Some people are really busy with college, or work, or both, or traveling, or never felt like it, or who knows how many things. So yep, disagreed. (Though, a portion of them may be anyhow)
25afab here. The only thing I find odd is comparing yourself to others. I didn't lose mine until I was 20 & honestly wish I hadn't then but the past is the past. Finding someone who you have a deep enough connection with OR who you have electric chemistry with (or both of course) to take that leap with is what matters, not when ya do it.
Most of my friends were early bloomers so I can't say I know anyone in your shoes, but 🤷🏻♀️ I wouldn't say it's weird, especially with how dating is in this age.
Does a handjob count as losing my virginity?
Didn't lose my virginity til I was 24. That was 5 years ago.
Since then has it changed you?
Honestly, yes. Alot has changed about me the last 5 years. I'm a better person for sure.
lil bit. I'm 22 and have been with 70 women. mastered the cold approach as a highschooler
I'm 23 and a virgin, but haven't had any girlfriend's, mostly because I have trouble talking to girls
It is not weird at all!! In fact, it shows that you never forced yourself to do something you weren’t ready to do. Most teens do it because of hormones or peer pressure, not because it’s the right time. I lost mine after high school, and I wish I would have held off till I was much older. I wish I would have put more importance on it. Everyone is on their own timeline, don’t compare yourself to what you assume others are doing.
Same currently 22 about to be 23 in October and still a virgin, shit sucks man.
Don't worry I lost at 26, so no it's not weird ^^ and will happen when it's the right time ^^
Personally, I think it would only be "weird" to people who put way too much weight on sex to begin with.
If you don't feel ready or haven't met someone you want to have sex with yet that's totally fine.
Even if you [hypothetically] never do, remember that it's not a factor for success or happiness, plenty of people manage to have successful lives without ever having sex.
Sex seems to always mean something different to different people (and it can change throughout their lives) whether it's to be "macho", an act of love, procreation, liberation or freedom, just for fun/thrill/pleasure or it may not be all that important to them.
I guess if you feel it necessary try to figure out what sex means to you right now. If it's not a priority for you right now and you're okay with that, there's no shame in it no matter what people say.
There is no shame. I was 24 when i lost mine. It was on impulse. Something that just happened. Most people goes around like its a game, some wait till they find someone special. I will say, in my teens, it wasnt an urge. I didnt go on a quest to lose my virginity. Technically i was an overweight nerd and loser in my teens. some are just late bloomers. But i will say this. I did have great relationships with most of my girlfriends i did have. Here i am sounding like a big loser, so be it, but im old fashioned.
im still virgin and honestly i dont care what people think to be fair i have major trust issues form past relationships so i don't see me losing it anytime soon
Don’t be ashamed. Time will come. I’m 19 & I’ve had girlfriends in the past but no sex yet. I feel like I will end up dying virgin but I don’t wanna think that way. Both of us will get pussy🤝
bruh, lost my virginity pretty easily
I think the statistics today are that people are single virgins longer/later. People aren’t getting married, aren’t in relationships, aren’t having casual sex like they used to.
Its not really weird. I lost mine at 21 and have only been with 2 people since. Don't feel embarrassed. We all move at different speeds.
Imo, this is a very personal thing. It's something you can only answer for yourself. If I were to still be a virgin at 22 I'd be mortified but, that's because I'VE placed such significance on it. I made it my one and only goal to lose my virginity once I turned 18, and I did. I felt like if I didn't get it out of the way it would keep eating away at my conscious and I would always be nervous about it. My first time was a one-night stand and I have no regrets. I prefer it that way because their opinion of my first time is never gonna matter. That first time prepared me for more meaningful relationships later down the road.
What's weird are people who lose their virginity because they have to. Good for you.
Lmfao, my boy; you just got out of the heliosphere you got time ⏲️
Not weird. Don't give it up to be like everyone else. At least you have less chance of an std.
Dude I'm a sex addict (19F). Trust me, age has nothing to do with anything. Be it is sex or having a date. Yeah off course, just because it's not common according to ideal society's standard, it does affect you a little in some way or the other. But Chill, there's nothing to worry about. Just take your time. Everyone has their own pace of doing everything which is okay.