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Murphthegurth

The queens actually off on a secret island riding jet skis with Elvis and Mr Blobby.


CarterD27

Then watching a live Tupac and Biggie Smalls concert and moonwalking with Michael Jackson in the evening


Orange-Murderer

Topping it off with a comedy set from Sean Lock and Robin Williams.


pauly13771377

And taking LSD with Jim Morrison.


itsfeckingfreezing

A weekend at Lizzie’s


ClydeinLimbo

[🎶Blobby Blobby Blobby🎶](https://youtu.be/h37KQu64RY4)


FatLegTed

With Jimmy Savile as DJ at the after dinner disco.


jdidisjdjdjdjd

The royals did love him, unfortunately.


Freddies_Mercury

Wasn't just the royals. A particular favourite of Thatcher too...


sheet_eater47

Schrödinger's Queen


TheLeviathong

No, she's definitely dead


BabyBringMeToast

You can’t know that unless you open the box. Go on. I double dog dare you.


Incitatus_For_Office

Apparently, some guy tried that.


hendidjdnsjjf

Don’t leave us hanging, was she dead or alive


BabyBringMeToast

Yes.


Bekenel

Much like Elvis, the Queen is not dead, she just went home.


AgentOrangutan

I read somewhere it's a lead lined coffin, which slows or prevents decomposition


mothzilla

Partly true. It's mostly to stop her getting out.


Ciaobellabee

She’s actually not dead, Charles just finally got bored of waiting and shut her in a coffin


E420CDI

[*I don't want to go on the cart!*](https://youtu.be/Jdf5EXo6I68)


DazzleLove

I’m getting better!


98raider

No, you’re not, you’ll be stone dead in a minute!


HullIsNotThatBad

I feel happy, I feel happy!


ghostlight1969

I can’t take ‘im like that, it’s against regulations!


BatmanLink

Now I'm imagining that bit from Absolutely Fabulous - where Jennifer Saunders is covered in nicotine patches and keeps slapping them on Julia Sawalha saying 'wasp sweetie ' And thinking of the King shoving all sorts under the lid. Coffin 101


Bravo1781

Well, it’s been a week so she’s probably dead by now 🤷🏻‍♀️


HolyFuckFuckThis

Bold of you to assume the Queen is mortal


texanarob

As cruel as it is to bury someone alive/lock them in a coffin, it would be even crueler to lock them in a coffin with extra oxygen, food and water.


mustbeanerror

there was this case.... [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kidnapping\_of\_Colleen\_Stan](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kidnapping_of_Colleen_Stan) 😨


BellendicusMax

That is not dead which can eternal lie and with strange aeons even death may die. I want to see stakes. Garlic. Holy water. The works.


Lunakitty93

I feel so bad for how funny I found this comment


Ciaobellabee

I feel slightly bad for writing it, but it’s just what popped into my head!


BatmanLink

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I love the Queen, but that *is* funny, can't lie about that. In all seriousness though, I think that, ever since his family started dying, it seemed to hit him that he would lose his mother - before you lose people, you can know it, but not really get it, if you know what I mean. Then he seemed to realise that he can still express an opinion since he wasn't King yet, and THEN he got to marry the love of his life. He really settled down in so many ways, and now, he's got the straight jacket. I actually felt really bad for him a few days ago - just looking totally devastated - he may be 73, but it's like Cilla Black said - you're never ready to be an orphan. Someone else said it won't be long before it's his turn for this particular beautiful and terrible circus - not their exact words - and I agree with that. He's a softer generation than his parents, I think ten years or so, and then William will be on the throne. I know a lot of people are saying, Queen gone, time to Republic again, but whether they like King Charles or not, there's a LOT of support for William and Katherine. Interesting times ahead methinks!


BellendicusMax

I think he danced around his bedroom wearing just the crown shouting it's mine now bitch. She crown blocked him for years.


Crossertosser

Them godzilla lizard radiation beams need locking up tight.


ehsteve23

i thought that was the pure silver spikes lining the inside


megabot13

I've just choked reading this 😂😂😂 you're going to hell


DaughterOfNone

Also stops Superman from seeing her


Diggerinthedark

It's more that they've probably replaced her blood with embalming fluid then dunked her in the stuff again for good measure.


screeRCT

I believe this is true, its so the coffin can be kept above ground like a few of the previous monarchs.


miffedmonster

Yeah if they hadn't done this, she'd be honking already


NoAct77

Dont they already pump you full of chemicals to stop you from rotting so fast?


DozyDrake

Na that's to keep her from coming back to life


achillea4

That coffin must have been dragged around the country for years just in case she carked it.


YouNeedAnne

How would that work?


AgentOrangutan

Oh, because it's completely air tight, so no moisture can enter or escape


Mirhanda

Anaerobic bacteria don't need air. Corpses begin to putrefy almost immediately after death. She's probably becoming a puddle as we speak.


xcameleonx

I don't think it's empty, Noel Edmunds will show up on Monday to reveal it was the 1p box the whole time.


Aele1410

10 days does seem like a long time to wait for burial. It must basically be a freezer if she is in there


Mordvark

Embalming is a helluva drug.


neilmac1210

It's unknown whether she was embalmed or not. Some royals are, some aren't, it's their choice.


VeedleDee

I'd be genuinely surprised if she wasn't embalmed - especially if there were family viewings afterwards, even people who die peacefully tend to look pretty odd as the muscles relax. I don't know for sure of course but I expect the catafalque will have refrigeration underneath to help slow decomposition as well. AFAIK lead lined coffins are a requirement in the UK if you're being interred in a crypt though, since regular coffins aren't suitable. Interestingly through history most monarchies have made use of some kind of embalming techniques even before formaldehyde- the Austrian Imperial family is the one that comes to mind. They really took it to a new level though.


size_matters_not

Not a bad idea - William the conqueror burst when they tried to stuff his body into his tomb. Filled the church with a rancid smell. They don’t do royal funerals like they used to.


AFCBatmouth

Not only are they embalmed as you say, but Royalty are kept in Lead-lined coffins. It is a royal tradition, dating back centuries, for coffins to be lined with lead. This is because lead coffins can preserve the body for up to a year – important due to the way Royal Family members are typically buried.


VeedleDee

Indeed! The lead lining goes back before formaldehyde embalming was in use because man, no one wants to experience a busted coffin. Imagine Westminster Abbey being full of exploding corpses. I think in some countries if a mausoleum is being used, the lead coffin isn't required anymore because modern coffins can be designed to allow the gases to escape in a safe way (along with ventilation of crypts etc) but occasionally, if something hasnt been done properly, you can come across a mausoleum which has bust open. Ask A Mortician on YouTube has a cool video on it.


owzleee

If she’s not embalmed then that’s basically a box of soup at this point.


DazzleLove

Lenin knows.


AFCBatmouth

Also a lead lined coffin. Its a Royal tradition and it dramatically slows the decomposing phase.


Marvinleadshot

Bernard Cribbins was buried on Wednesday, he died in **July**!


DaughterOfNone

Aw shit, you just reminded me that Bernard Cribbins died


jabez_killingworth

"Right," said Fred, "Both of us together One each end and steady as we go." Tried to shift it, couldn't even lift it We was getting nowhere And so we had a cuppa tea


MichaelRennie

Noooooooooo I didn’t know this :( Aw now I’m really sad.


ValdemarAloeus

Yes, but was he in a bowler hat?


wozza365

Vladimir Lenin has been in a box in the Red Square for decades. If they can make that work (although there's definitely not much of him left underneath) then they can make her last 10 days. I would say 10 days is probably within the upper limits for standard services anyway?


aabbcc28

The lead lining is preventing/delaying decomposing.


StevieG63

How does that work then?


elmo298

The undead can't escape lead lined coffins, it's quite common actually surprised you didn't know


GregorF92

Like Godzilla, royals are radioactive lizards. The decomposition is a result of the radiation leaving their bodies, so the lead prevents that happening. Serious answer: Prevents moisture and air getting in, and keeps it airtight. Think of it like a big plastic tub.


ItchyKnowledge

She's basically in tupperware.


TurbulentExpression5

Stop it, you're making me hungry.


valkyre09

Mmmm regal soup


StevieG63

So they hermetically seal the unembalmed body in lead. Genuinely interested here.


[deleted]

I read a thingy (don't know how true it is) saying she was embalmed and then hermetically sealed.


YesAmAThrowaway

It delays it a bit, yeah. Also prevents nasty smells from getting out.


Beagly-boo

There are ways to preserve body. Freezing is one. What about smoking?


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BellendicusMax

Burning. Burning also works on the undead.


ehsteve23

hasn’t philip been on ice since last year because they need to be buried together? or is that just a rumour?


IndigoPlum

They're shifting him from one room of St George's Chapel vaults to another.


NineFiftyFive

I thought this from the beginning. While the whole country was watching that line of cars leave Balmoral, nobody was watching that nondescript Hertz rental van that left an hour later.


ZS1G

Nobody was watching a unmarked van just drive out with a jeep escorting it either. Seemed a bit suspicious to me I can’t lie.


ZS1G

No idea what it was for or anything but all I know is that private ambulances or whatever don’t usually get possible military guard.


fsutrill

Could have been embalming waste that they didn’t want people to take it and try to sell on eBay.


TheLaudMoac

Please, she's the Queen for fuck's sake. Facebook marketplace at least.


NerdBlender

“Is this still available”


Togodooders

I see no reason why she wouldn’t be in there. What I don’t get is why people are queuing for hours when the tomb will be there in public view for a millennia.


PoliticalShrapnel

Is it actually going to be public? Is that confirmed?


Davegeekdaddy

I thought it's a private tomb?


[deleted]

Actually not, she's being buried on her private estate in the family tomb.


Incitatus_For_Office

Certainly not the Willennium anymore.


Mirhanda

Millennia is plural, I think you mean "for a millennium".


Odysseus_is_Ulysses

Or “for Millenia?”


silnt

Or instead, simply let “a” = [0, ∞)


GrugnarTheReader

There is no body, she became one with the force.


maestrojv

I agree, makes no sense to risk the real thing considering there have already been nutters make a lunge, and allows for the real family to mourn properly. I reckon it's a Cullinan Diamond situation, lizzie was probably driven down to London separately and tucked away in private.


EB2B

> lizzie was probably driven down to London separately Weekend at Bernie's style


Orange-Murderer

*weekend at Lizzie's.


[deleted]

But what are they going to do to a body in a lead lined casket which is sealed? And the fact the fella was pounced on within seconds sort of shows there isn't a risk because noone can get to the coffin for any length of time. Unless I am really missing something here?


OobleCaboodle

They also have snipers on the roofs all around and a rather large military protection force.


maestrojv

Okay, this is a way waaay out there scenario, but something they no doubt had to plan for along with umpteen other things. A bomb attack or similar maybe? Nobody wants to see bits of scorched monarch amongst the wreckage.


HighlandsBen

Ooh, yes, are those the real Crown jewels on top of the coffin? That's a far more interesting question IMHO.


SongsOfDragons

IKR, those are some of the most fabulous individual gems known, and some with a butt-ton of history to them. Even if that was a fake, it's a good fake and probably worth a lot of money in and of itself.


ADIRed2

> risk the real thing Risk what exactly? Somebody lunging at a sealed coffin, or somebody lunging at a sealed empty coffin, makes no difference.


turkeypants

I think that makes the most sense. It just seems prudent. Why risk it if people wouldn't know the difference? The whole thing is realistically for the symbolism anyway. It's just about emotions and giving people that sense of connection and closure. An empty box does that just as well, yet with no complications involving either body storage failures or protest incidents.


squiddlumckinnon

I reckon she’s just gonna walk in with the rest of the queue at some point and say it’s all been a prank


Fattydog

My father wasn’t buried for 2.5 weeks. It’s not unheard of at all. They transport bodies all the time, and used to do so before air and train travel, by using lead-lined caskets. Bodies don’t turn into suppurating, seeping messes within a couple of days. It takes a while.


chiefgareth

I thought this from the beginning. I can't imagine she's actually in there. Not worth the risk.


Chef_Fats

Risk of what? I’m sure it won’t kill her.


chiefgareth

Risk of someone getting to it and knocking it over I guess. Absolutely tiny chance of that happening, but if it did and she was in it...well it wouldn't be great.


aeropagitica

The coffin has been under constant guard by both the Police and the Armed Services since Balmoral. No one unauthorised will be allowed through the layers of security. The Lying In State may be ceremonial but the security is real.


terrynutkinsfinger

It's lined with lead, it's not a wobbly vase.


PoliticalShrapnel

Redditor is imagining a tom and jerry episode.


psycho-mouse

What would be worse, if somebody knocked it over and the dead queen comes rolling out, or somebody knocks it over and it’s empty. I’d wager the latter would cause absolute uproar. People queueing for 30 hours to see an empty coffin.


ADIRed2

Again, sealed. Lead lined. Empty or her in there, nothing is going to come rolling out or the lid pop off showing it's empty.


Diggerinthedark

> knocking it over The coffin that took like 6-8 pall bearers to carry in? Good luck.


megabot13

I bet you I'm clumsy enough to knock it over.....


Bau5_Sau5

You mean like this ? https://www.reddit.com/r/ThatsInsane/comments/xg91hu/police_tackle_man_who_tried_to_rush_towards_queen/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf


YouNeedAnne

That's why they have the blokes with swords and that.


UtopiaFrenzy

Tbh, earlier when the bloke lunged at it those fellows with the swords didn’t move an inch.


ADIRed2

> but if it did and she was in it It weighs a ton and is not going anywhere. But if by some chance it did, it's sealed. Empty or not, visually it's going to look exactly the same, she's not going to be falling out.


Murphyitsnotyou

Risk of some lunatic setting off an explosive and her coffin being blown across the room. Thousand of people have been through there. It's not unimaginable to think a terrorist could get in easily. They just wouldn't risk it so common folk can see her actual coffin.


Isgortio

You'd think people would be able to spot someone being super shifty in a queue for 14 hours, trying to avoid putting their bag down in a certain way or brushing against anything so they don't accidentally explode part of the way through the queue. Is there any sort of bag search or body scanning security as you get nearer the venue?


HermitBee

Apparently there's airport style security and you're only allowed a small bag in the hall. I doubt anyone's getting through with any quantity of explosives.


Chef_Fats

She’s already dead. If she isn’t in the coffin and that’s exposed, it’ll do far more damage than the explosion would.


PoliticalShrapnel

>terrorist could get in easily. Bless your silly little heart. There are metal detectors outside and airport esque security. Terrorists aren't 'easily' getting in. All entrances are heavily guarded.


ValdemarAloeus

Would be really bad press if it turned out she wasn't there. If they really _had_ to not have her in the coffin you'd imagine they'd at least put her in the really solid plinth. Or you know, surround it with guards or something.


WalkingCloud

The idea that they would risk enormous public backlash at a time of transition, and amongst their biggest supporters, for literally zero gain is absolutely ridiculous. It wouldn't pass one planning meeting, I would be astounded if they were stupid enough for her not to be in there.


Redsoldiergreen

Schrodingers Queen


nekrovulpes

She isn't dead, she just went home.


canarinhoputasso

Best MIB quote


E420CDI

The last suit you'll ever wear


J03130

Even if she's there, why are people queueing up literally 24 hours to walk past a corpse


Lanky-Amphibian1554

Interesting to me that a lot of people think there’s no body in there but are queuing up anyway. I thought people were quite (and this is my unkind way of putting it, ignore my crappy personal opinions) sentimentally attached to venerating dead bodies, but it seems people don’t care as much as I thought. Of course whether or not the body is in the coffin or not, the Queen isn’t really there and you can’t actually visit her. But people want to do it either way. My assumption is that the body is in the coffin because… why not, they have centuries of experience in storing bodies in crypts. Someone said what if terrorists kidnap the body. Imagine taking that ransom call. Give us £BIGNUM or we’ll withhold something you don’t want. Like… okay? No no that’s fine, you keep it.


HmmSinkSo

Don't complain, it makes brilliant TV. Apparently 24 hours isn't long enough to either decide what to do when you arrive at the coffin or practice, I tuned in for a few seconds yesterday and saw a woman curtsy, cross herself and then bow. Also a fair few young women trying a curtsy out and then giggling/smiling awkwardly because they rightly feel quite foolish, then remembering where they are and trying to stop smiling.


manwithanopinion

Nobody told us what is the right thing to do so people just do what they think is right.


Murphyitsnotyou

One of those "were jumping in the air together" pics and a couple of selfies for the gram


sharabi_bandar

Interestingly, you're not allowed selfies with the coffin.


jtothemofudging

I saw a woman cross herself, make a prayer gesture, then pop a peace sign as she walked off.


BananaScroller

Just saw a woman cross herself, then blow a kiss, this is a fascinating watch


drunkgirl14

I saw this woman do the same on TV but I thought it was a rock on sign 🤘


PunctualZombie

A little bit of curiosity, a dash of wanting to pay respect, and a healthy dollop of slight madness.


zippysausage

With a side helping of social vanity.


Essexal

My ma went up yesterday, dropped her off at the station at 2pm, she walked in the door at 6:15am this morning. My grandads ashes were scattered down in Cornwall last year. It would have taken less time to drive all the way down there and back, but if I’d suggested doing that a few weekends ago just to pay our respects(to someone we actually knew and who loved us on a personal level) I’d have been looked at as a mad man. I get it tho, there won’t ever be another thing so constant for 70 years in todays times. We kinda saying goodbye to a bit of man kind in a way.


jimmytruelove

The same reason we have funerals.. and have done so since the beginning of the human race. For closure and to pay respects


J03130

I guess I must be the weird one then cos to me lining up that long for a stranger who didn't know or care about you is just stupidity.


pixm

I'm more surprised they didn't put a perspex screen up or something. We must have a few banging about after the last few years. Just seems logical, either she's there and an extra layer of protection would help, or it's empty and a secret needs to avoid being found out. Seems obvious to me but I guess there's something about not using barriers in the rulebook?


SoreLoserOfDumbtown

>We must have a few banging about after the last few years I’m sure Charles would approve of the recycling…? 🤣


GONA_B_L8

I said that from the very start when she apparently made the round in Scotland. “The coffin is empty” and she was already in London from the very start. There are too many nutters in the world to expose the dead queen to on a daily basis and there is no chance the monarchy would take the risk.


Mordvark

Living monarchs do it all the time.


VardaElentari86

What would happen though? She's already dead, she's literally guarded round the clock and it's a sturdy box. Why have the hassle of NOT having her in there?


dangerdee92

But the living members of the Royal family have been making public appearances daily since she died. So you think the monarchy is happy taking the risks of the living members being exposed daily but for some reason wouldn't want to take the same risk with a corpse ?


cmzraxsn

I'm honestly surprised the corpse isn't on display tbh


stvbles

I was shocked when I was younger when one of the Pope's was out for everyone to see, I think it was Pope John Paul II.


cmzraxsn

If you're my age or younger he's the only one who's died in your lifetime, that was like 15 years ago and he was Pope for about 40-50 years before that. Ratzinger is still alive and Francis ~~is relatively young~~ is my grandma's age at 85. I genuinely thought he was 20 years younger. Still, he's in good health, he's not on the way out.


queenpaigethecoolx

We don't do open caskets over here


cmzraxsn

Yeah but i thought the royals would have their own weird quirks.


queenpaigethecoolx

Nope. The last thing the royal family would want is pictures of her dead body all over the papers and social media


jen_17

Like a real Madame Tussaud’s?


h00dman

It's a lead lined coffin literally surrounded by armed guards. It may very well be empty but the only reason behind that possibility is that we can't see inside it and prove otherwise. This is the most boring conspiracy ever lol.


Suspicious-mole-hair

Either way whatever. "They knew some whackjob would need to check and mangle it up so they kept it safe somewhere else" Alternatively "Corpse is in box where corpse belongs". There's no story other than the story. The stakes are self-propelled.


Sharpax

Schrödinger's queen! :D


Ratiocinor

Genuinely baffled by the people who believe she's not in there Do people not know what embalming is? Humans have been dealing with death for literally millennia. And we didn't even have fancy refrigeration back then we still coped. Even regular old Auntie Mabel will go days between dying and the eventual funeral, we know how to deal with and preserve bodies. And this is the Queen we're talking about, people have already explained all about the special sealed lead-lined coffin and whatnot > "But security concerns!" Wtf is someone gonna do? Run up and stab her to death? Steal the coffin? What are you scared of? The crown jewels, Charles, and the other royals who will all stand guard are far more valuable and they will all be there for real while the general public files past. Or are those facsimiles too?


Pharazonian

yep... ​ personally i think she's gone with the rest of the lizard people to return to her home in the stars


Stidda

Give me, sugar in water !


ivycatz

MORE.


Stidda

Your majesty, your skin is hanging off your bones....


Mordvark

Lizard people are Atlanteans, not aliens. Duh.


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Mordvark

It floats surprisingly well, but suddenly sinks with no warning.


The_Queef_of_England

The clue's in the name, "decker" - only ships have decks and they're so advanced, they have two.


SoreLoserOfDumbtown

I don’t know how the fantastic chocolate bar fits into this thread, I just know it does.


The_Queef_of_England

You have to be Atlantean to understand, something about chocolate sinking and nougat floating.


SoreLoserOfDumbtown

Who are you so wise in the ways of science? I’m clearly out of my depth in this conversation, so I’m going to be quiet now and let the grown ups talk.


ADIRed2

I've seen so many people say this across other subs and it doesn't make any sense. What is the point of such a ruse? You'd have to have people guarding where the body actually is, and if it ever leaked she wasn't in there there would so much public anger (or worse!) for what gain? What possible reason would there be to not just have her where she is supposed to be?


dewidragons

She’s already back on Azeroth 8. Its definitely empty.


DaBi5cu1t

I thought she was from Omicron Persei 8.


Gpooley

What you say is false… Women are from Omicron Persei 7, men are from Omicron Persei 9


umbrellajump

Why doesn't Camilla, the largest of the royals, simply eat the other ones?


Ch83az

No sorry can’t get on board with this one, what would be the point? No one is going to steal the corpse, what would be the point?


jrignall1992

For me as someone who has lost someone recently, I can believe it, a body needs to be kept as cool as possible to preserve the body as long as possible. Also a lot of families (not all) will visit the body up until the burial. I went to see my son almost daily and that was in a cold room for no longer then 30 mins a day, and even then there was a chance we would be advised to stop going because of decomposition, for some families this is an important mourning period. Now why I not a fan of royals and not bothered with the situation I can sympathise with her family and what they are going through. With all that in mind I could defo see the coffin being empty so her family can mourn in peace like they deserve.


Georexi

Sorry you lost your son. That must be fucking awful.


tothecatmobile

>For me as someone who has lost someone recently, I can believe it, a body needs to be kept as cool as possible to preserve the body as long as possible. She will have been embalmed.


Ch83az

I think it’s a lead lined coffin for exactly that reason but I see your point


king_duende

So superman can't see through it?


Ch83az

They’ve thought of everything!


Mirhanda

Does lead block the stench of a rotting body?


BurgaGalti

Don't have to steal it. Just an anti-monarchist with a lighter would suffice. In risk/reward there's zero risk in an empty box. In fact, I can't think of a reason why it wouldn't be empty.


Ch83az

They’ve got enough hidden security for the sparkly hat which is 1000% more of a target. The conspiracy of an empty coffin just feels like way too much effort


hoodie92

> feels like way too much effort How is it too much effort? The logistics of this whole operation are already of an enormous scale. Having 1 extra car and 1 extra coffin is small potatoes in comparison to the hundreds of portaloos for example.


Ch83az

Risking duping thousands who’ve come to see it at a time when the monarchy need to sell a new king to a nation? Don’t get me wrong I genuinely don’t care if she’s in there or not but I def think she is


Swotboy2000

An empty box is far from zero risk. If it were discovered it would significantly damage the monarchy.


BurgaGalti

So what, an empty box would somehow be worse than "I don't sweat?". If it got discovered it was empty the world would have a right good laugh about it for a week and then we'd forget.


Merlinpig

The only scenario in which it would be discovered is one in which it being empty would be beneficial to monarchist causes. "thank God liz wasn't in there, smart planning from our genius royals"


Swotboy2000

We have a free press. It would be leaked. It would be reported. “Tens of thousands waited hours to shuffle past an empty box” would be the end of the monarchy.


tothecatmobile

She will have been embalmed, so she won't be decomposing in the coffin, the coffin itself is hefty enough to need 8 soldiers to carry it, its on a platform that will no doubt be helping keep the coffin secure, and it's surrounded by guards 24/7. The body is safe.


Murphyitsnotyou

Been saying the same. If there's even a minor chance that the body/coffin could be blown up or some other nutcase doing something crazy then they wouldn't have her laying there while thousands of people filter in. No way