Start slow. Build up a dialogue and method. Learn how she communicates and how you communicate. Everyone loves a good fantasy of strict rules and collars and chastity. But if you just go right into the deepend its the little things that get lost. Epectations arent always clear rules need refining tasks or requests adjusted not everyone can express themselves in a way suited to the situation.
Take her normal daily routine. What does she do. Adjust it imrpove it and solidify it. Ie waking uo/washing cleaning brushing teeth making breakfast. Clarify and set rules. This is a healthy direct way to take control and to work on communicating failures or successes. Then start slow dont go right into intense stuff esp if your both new. If its easier to lie then it is to do a task then its likely to be done and so you want to work up to it. And build that trust and decorum. On top of a daily routine id suggest weekly tasks or controls these would be harder have expressed expectations and punishments amd be about growth and moving in the directionnyou both want to see. Be that like physical training or verbal or reinforcing the dynamic. Ect.
Start slow with easy daily tasks and a couple of simple rituals. What you will find interesting is that their obedience will come easier than your own vigilance if you make it too burdensome. If you don't keep up your end it will send a message to the sub that it's not important, and by extension neither are they. It takes work on your part to be the structure that they crave.
We started with things she did every day, and I would simply inspect and approve her efforts with significant praise, or correction when she would slack.
With regard to ritual we started a simple requirement that her first and last words each day is "Good Morning Master" and "Good Night Sweet Dreams Master". Most of the day we don't use honorifics, except in high protocol, but this was a simple, and specifically timed thing that could be easily enforced.
Talk to her about if it's something she wants in scene or in life in general. Having daily rules and rituals sounds really hot, but it's not for everyone and can get annoying when life gets in the way, or you're just having a bad day.
Especially at first, I'd have a safeword or a way to call pause if you decide to do life rules.
Personally, I'd start with in scene obedience training, maybe have her learn and practice a few poses, or a "proper" (whatever you both decide that means) way to undress after you give her the signal. Small things like that. Especially if she's looking for something a little more hands on, this would be a good place to start.
Also, it would be good to discuss if you haven't already what type of obedience training she's looking for. Slave/formal/pet/DDLG all have different approaches and could be less fun if you try to train her for something she's not as interested in.
Easy thing to do is record a voice track " you are mine and mine alone" etc etc so like a 5-10 min repeating track you can add stuff where "who is your master" and if she doesn't say your name she gets a whip, etc nothing hotter than having a girl imobilized listening to your voice blindfolded as she's says your name. Sensory dep play as well with noise cancelling headphones.
start slow and keep everything rules achievable and enforceable. don't try rolling out a whole boarding school list of rules and immediately expect compliance, it doesn't work that way.
keep the rules meaningful for either you or your partner, arbitrary rules get eye rolls and are quickly forgotten, undermining the process.
start with 1-3 rules, try it for a month, then talk about what's working, what's not and what adjustments are needed. add / remove / adjust as necessary.
Start slow. Build up a dialogue and method. Learn how she communicates and how you communicate. Everyone loves a good fantasy of strict rules and collars and chastity. But if you just go right into the deepend its the little things that get lost. Epectations arent always clear rules need refining tasks or requests adjusted not everyone can express themselves in a way suited to the situation. Take her normal daily routine. What does she do. Adjust it imrpove it and solidify it. Ie waking uo/washing cleaning brushing teeth making breakfast. Clarify and set rules. This is a healthy direct way to take control and to work on communicating failures or successes. Then start slow dont go right into intense stuff esp if your both new. If its easier to lie then it is to do a task then its likely to be done and so you want to work up to it. And build that trust and decorum. On top of a daily routine id suggest weekly tasks or controls these would be harder have expressed expectations and punishments amd be about growth and moving in the directionnyou both want to see. Be that like physical training or verbal or reinforcing the dynamic. Ect.
Thank you your words are very helpful and I appreciate your response
Wow that’s so good !
Start slow with easy daily tasks and a couple of simple rituals. What you will find interesting is that their obedience will come easier than your own vigilance if you make it too burdensome. If you don't keep up your end it will send a message to the sub that it's not important, and by extension neither are they. It takes work on your part to be the structure that they crave. We started with things she did every day, and I would simply inspect and approve her efforts with significant praise, or correction when she would slack. With regard to ritual we started a simple requirement that her first and last words each day is "Good Morning Master" and "Good Night Sweet Dreams Master". Most of the day we don't use honorifics, except in high protocol, but this was a simple, and specifically timed thing that could be easily enforced.
Talk to her about if it's something she wants in scene or in life in general. Having daily rules and rituals sounds really hot, but it's not for everyone and can get annoying when life gets in the way, or you're just having a bad day. Especially at first, I'd have a safeword or a way to call pause if you decide to do life rules. Personally, I'd start with in scene obedience training, maybe have her learn and practice a few poses, or a "proper" (whatever you both decide that means) way to undress after you give her the signal. Small things like that. Especially if she's looking for something a little more hands on, this would be a good place to start. Also, it would be good to discuss if you haven't already what type of obedience training she's looking for. Slave/formal/pet/DDLG all have different approaches and could be less fun if you try to train her for something she's not as interested in.
Easy thing to do is record a voice track " you are mine and mine alone" etc etc so like a 5-10 min repeating track you can add stuff where "who is your master" and if she doesn't say your name she gets a whip, etc nothing hotter than having a girl imobilized listening to your voice blindfolded as she's says your name. Sensory dep play as well with noise cancelling headphones.
Sounds like way too much work.
start slow and keep everything rules achievable and enforceable. don't try rolling out a whole boarding school list of rules and immediately expect compliance, it doesn't work that way. keep the rules meaningful for either you or your partner, arbitrary rules get eye rolls and are quickly forgotten, undermining the process. start with 1-3 rules, try it for a month, then talk about what's working, what's not and what adjustments are needed. add / remove / adjust as necessary.