T O P
Jux_

Heyman just fell to his knees in a Walmart


JTCMuehlenkamp

And then the Walmart burned down as a result of arson.


ContinuumGuy

Who will judge?


cassatta

Yes


MegaGrimer

Hopefully the Giants.


Good-Personality5471

Aaron


kirbyfaraone

Chad Passan vs Virgin Heyman


marshmelo24

Just saw an old dude drop to his knees at Walmart. Must've been him.


LAAngelsAnaheim

Just saw a Bitmoji drop to his knees in a Walmart


lkasnu

*behind a Walmart*


sgt_dismas

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


ThugosaurusFlex_1017

*Dollar General


sboogie34

Goodbye sweet prince <3 treat him well Giants bros


RealLiveGirl

We will. We always do 😘


ahr3410

Giants showed good judgment in this signing


Superiority_Complex_

They got the better player indeed. 2021 Mitch Haniger: 39 homers, 100 RBIs. 2021 Aaron Judge: 39 homers, 98 RBIs. Pretty much a wash. Those two extra runs driven in by Mitch could make the difference though. Career homers per current testicle: Mitch, 112. Judge, 110. Mitch is more testicularly efficient. Career triples: Mitch, 10. Judge, 4. Mitch is only 299 triples away from tying Sam Crawford for most all-time. Judge is much farther back. Syllables in their last name: Mitch, 3. Judge, 1. Better value for the money with jersey sales.


unboundhobbit

Testicularly efficient is how I will measure everything in my life from now on. Thank you


[deleted]

Three syllable names are best for chants too


justin_tino

“HA-NI-G…. wait”


changealifetoday

... The category was "people you don't want to live next to"


sfan27

Aaron Judge is three syllables.


Hufflepuff_Baseball

Agree with you about the syllables thing. Players with three and four syllable surnames are a lot more fun to chant than players with one


TheOddAverage

I love the nickname “Testicularly Efficient” for Haniger.


AhLibLibLib

I love how you put Judge’s last name and not Haniger’s. Poor stat displaying smh


Superiority_Complex_

Mitch: commonly known solely by his first name. Judge: there are many Aarons.


Idaheck

You meant Meetch


ms_barkie

They’re Aaron on the side of caution with a smaller OF signing


clydefrog232

They thought about this signing over many dinners, perhaps at the 99


kvvyn

Yeah, good Judge-ment. I see what you did there


emolga587

I saw Giants and my heart sank


Bucs-and-Bucks

I thought you'd get Haniger, too


emolga587

Hopefully the Giants don't hog *all* the Christmas presents


ABlinDeafMonkey

It’d be karma for all the times Hal did that.


handlit33

Outfielder ... San Francisco Giants ... agreement ... Aaron Judge.


emolga587

The writers are really dragging out this season finale


scrapsbypap

It's OK buddy, can't win em all


scottishere

"Giants", "$43.5m"... I thought it was over. It might still be over, but I thought it was immediately over.


xRememberTheCant

Just wait……. It’s gonna happen


emolga587

I know


Monk_Philosophy

Same


jameskeg

Just watched some guy fall to his knees in a walamrt


Arthur___Dent

I am devastated. Mitch, I will always love you.


The_Throwback_King

Pouring out one last MEETCH for old times. May he send gorgeous bombs into the bay.


scottydg

He absolutely will not. Righties have only hit 30-some homers to RF in the 23 years of the park, hardly ever more than wallscrapers.


eggs-dee123

Hopefully someone will hit the glove sometime


scottydg

Also absolutely not. That is over 500 feet away and high above the field. I'd love it though.


pinesolthrowaway

No no, he’ll hit them so far he hits the bay past LF


nearest_exit_please

Heartbroken. I will be watching the Giants this coming season


Ondrikus

This one hurts. Dug up [this old meme](https://i.imgur.com/XBh7S2H.png) from 2018 for this occasion


[deleted]

https://youtu.be/x_UweKpbCss


aznsportsfan

It’s not Judge but I like this move


IInviteYouToTheParty

SF is a great place for Mitch. Gets to go home, gets paid and is not in the AL West. I wish we could’ve brought him back but I’m glad he got paid.


ilovethisforyou

Thrilled it's not the AL West. Love you Mitchell. Sorry about your testicle, but this is for the best.


clucifer

Username checks out!


ABlinDeafMonkey

Wait what happened to his testicle? Is this a Jose Alvarez situation? Lol


BobbyFuckingB

Fastball ruptured it


Ovreel

Fun fact - The mariners lead the league in ruptured testicles, historically.


NugMeister

What's funny (or painful) about it, is that the Mariners have 5 ruptured testicles from 4 players. Josias Mansanillo had both testicles ruptures by a Manny Ramirez line drive before picking up the ball, throwing him out, and running straight off the field for medical attention.


MCPtz

Oh no, pour two out for double rupture...


ABlinDeafMonkey

Do you have a video of the play?


MMAdfs

That's fukt up man


ABlinDeafMonkey

I want to see a man make a hell of a play while in immense pain. I watch Jomboy’s breakdown of Jose Alvarez’s testicular contusion at least once a year.


concrete_isnt_cement

I’m gonna guess the count was two balls and one strike


Seahawkanon

Beltre and ~~Salomon Torres~~ Josias Manzanillo.


1005thArmbar

Dude ruptured a testicle for us in right field a few years ago and somehow managed to stay in the game for an inning or two afterwards. I still don't understand how he managed to do that


vwmommy05

It was during an at bat, not in the field


Superiority_Complex_

Adrenaline can allow the body to do some wild things.


ericrs22

Balls of Steel


VStarffin

Ugh. This is a good signing for the Giants. I hate it.


nuberoo

Yeah it's not too bad. Need a righty bat with a bit of pop. AAV not terrible. Maybe they can help his approach to be a bit more patient


OfTheDim

His main issue is not getting hurt every other season.


Monk_Philosophy

Look, it’s not Judge. Let’s just be thankful for that right now.


VStarffin

I want them to sign Judge. Actively rooting for it.


Monk_Philosophy

I like it narratively but it scares me competitively


CubonesDeadMom

Lol shut up. We’ve had to compete against all the massive stars on the dodgers for years and have done just fine overall if you ask me. The dodgers last year was literally one of the craziest line ups ever


Monk_Philosophy

dude I had to live through EYBS... while living in the bay.


AmericanChapo

Don’t be scared. They sign Judge and they become the greatest 80 win team of all time!


kyler_

Lot of Yankees fan salt the last few days 😂 even more than usual from the worst fanbase in sports


jeremygraham86

Dude can’t stay healthy


ABlinDeafMonkey

You guys need pitching help.


yianni1229

> Signing Haniger does not take the Giants out of the running for Aaron Judge I will choose to believe it does


BenderB-Rodriguez

*you have choosen.....poorly*


InaudibleShout

will you promise to at least take me out to dinner first


BenderB-Rodriguez

I make no financial promises in this economy


87broseidon

I always repeat that Indiana Jones line when I inevitably pick the wrong Costco gas lane


_chrom_

Choosen


TheWomanIWas

Giants 👀


betheusernameyouwant

Rangers 👀


xClay2

I like it. Put him in LF and hope that Judge is in RF.


Cabrit1990

Nah. RF at Oracle is tricky. Pretty sure they’d keep Yaz there.


bicyclingdonkey

I know he can play CF but do you think he signs with the expectation of playing it full time?


Silverjackal_

Man i hope not. CF is definitely harder on the body than a corner OF spot.


CubonesDeadMom

Judge could learn to play right, he’s a good outfielder


Cabrit1990

Well, he’ll be playing RF… at Yankee Stadium! Lol can’t believe we actually got our hopes up. Bridesmaid again ffs. Did anyone even tell Judge that Captain Klay would take him around the bay?!


Pick_at_the_Stick

Where is Joc in this scenario


xClay2

Playing as the DH where he belongs.


marrab22

DH. Dude is an awful outfielder


diestache

DH lol. He wasn't exactly blowing the lid off of LF


MCPtz

We have Joc Pederson in LF/DH too...


Yuseichaaan13

Hopefully this is homecoming 1 out of 2


scrapsbypap

The signing everyone was F5ing for


lolDICKhahaCOCKS

the outfielder signing with the Giants we were all expecting


DontGiveUpTheDip

outfielder 1 of 2 down


cooljammer00

McCutchen reunion


DontGiveUpTheDip

The Return^^TM


didhestealtheraisins

Local kid 1 of 2 down.


camisada

they got their guy


_Elrond_Hubbard_

End my life At least it's not the Angels


breakfast_cats

Pretty sure that was out the window when we got Renfroe


NevermoreSEA

Giving Mitch three years is quite a choice. I'm certainly wishing him the best in San Francisco though.


Grimpig

He’ll probably still be younger than most of the team in 3 years lol.


tarallelegram

truth


cooljammer00

What are the odds his testicle explodes again?


tegurit34

About half as likely as it was the last time it happened.


ox_raider

How did this thread descend into testicle talk?


ice_scalar

Have fun with Mitch. This will happen with every thread.


Cultural-Divide-2649

He has had a few different injuries but most of them flukey for sure . Last year though he did sprain his ankle . He rolls his ankle over every spin almost in an extreme way I’ve watched him do it for years so I was interested when last year he hurt his ankle . Not sure if that affected his swing after he came back or not tbh just an observation


tuckedfexas

I hope he has all the success in the world, but honestly I'm quite surprised he was able to get more than 2 years and at $15mil is way above what I thought his market would be.


Bank_It

Going to miss Haniger. Dude never could stay healthy with such freak injuries but was such a nice bat in the lineup.


downtothecellar

You’re not ‘Ron


Alex021402

I like this


DASmetal

You guys got a great player in Mitch. Yes, I know, injuries, but truly a fantastic guy for the time he's been with us and a great leader. We will definitely miss him.


Yuseichaaan13

Haniger - Yaz - Judge sounds pretty solid. Make it happen Farhan


counterbarrier

What happens to Joc? Is he gonna dh


zackappal

yes the plan is for Joc to DH


eggs-dee123

Given we had to see Joc play LF last year, yeah. DH


scrapsbypap

Thankfully, yes.


ABlinDeafMonkey

Yeah make it happen Farhan. Have Posey be at the next meeting with Judge.


CubonesDeadMom

Posey is actual ownership now so he’s probably been involved


Yuseichaaan13

This is a 100% reach for sure but hoping meeting Brady last night has an influence of some sort as well.


[deleted]

So now we got our Ace from Rocklin, a slugger from Mountain View, and now we wait for a certain guy from Linden...


Sexy_Tax_Man

Nice, I love it. Haniger is a stud as long as he’s on the field. If we don’t get Judge then Haniger and Nimmo would be a great consolation prize.


mxdSirty

TURN THAT STOVE UP


EskettiMySpaghetti

Well this is not the Giants OF signing I expected tonight


Victorystar0

:(


majorBotHead

NOOOOOOOO


leroywhat

I;m so sad


lookvideo1111

pain.


liteshadow4

If our top signing this free agency period is Mitch Haniger I'm gonna fucking lose it.


Victorystar0

The disrespect!


duckraul2

we have aaron judge at home


jeremygraham86

Shit man. At least y’all actually signing FAs😮‍💨


C-Hash

His name ain't Signer Jerry!


jeremygraham86

Haha…too true. The most frustrating thing is we don’t get better.


kingescher

seattle fan here. we love this guy. really sad to see him go. there are moments where he is the best hitter in the game. had a so-so year last year, will be curious how he does and if he can lay off low and away breaking pitches and control the zone a little more. gonna miss him a lot though.


CubonesDeadMom

Is he basically joc pederson


kingescher

im an AL guy so dont know joc super well but to us he’s just meeetch and is a great dude and a natural hitter.


dcarsonturner

Good luck in San Francisco! We’ll miss you in Seattle


Rakuen

Mitch Haniger who had the same WAR as belli in 1/3rd the games last year is getting significantly less AAV. What a world


KlaysToaster

This is a cheap contract?


robmcolonna123

Not really. He’s only played a full season twice, and is coming off a down year when he was injured and missed over 100 games. When he’s on top of his game he’s great, but he misses a lot of time and is also 32 now


[deleted]

That's a good deal if he even just plays 2 years


robmcolonna123

He’s averaged 106 games per season and is only getting older. Playing full seasons two out of those 3 years is honestly a big if in my opinion. And value wise, his amazing 2018 season really skews everything. Without that season he’s averaged 2.7 WAR per 162 games. Not bad by any means, but if you figure he plays 100 games per season, that’s only 1.6 WAR produced. That’s 4.8 WAR across the contract, and $43.5 brings an expected 5.4 WAR. And I think I’m being generous giving him 300 games across the contract seeing how 3 of the 5 seasons since his rookie year he didnt hit 100 games, and two of them he didnt even hit 65. This is a contract that absolutely needs him to stay healthy and play a lot. At his pace, assuming no decline (in ages 32-34) he needs to play 325 games. Realistically, he probably will begin to regress in the final year. Say he averages 2.3 WAR/162 across these 3 years, he’ll need to play 380 games (about 127/season). Maybe he does, maybe he doesn’t, but that’s a definitely not a cheap contract when you look at what you’re getting. At its best it’s right in line with what you’re paying for. At its worst it’s a big overpay for a guy on the IL


RougeAlexander

Most of his injuries are fluky shit like losing a nut. He could easily end up playing 130+/season if he doesn't have bad luck.


robmcolonna123

I feel like we hear that with every injury prone player. Eventually it’s just who they are, and I think 11 years into his career, that’s who he is. Looking at his minor league stats and games played, it looks like he had “bad luck” then too. Also FWIW, with what I said above I did not include the 2020 season since that was such a weird time for the world and a lot of players chose to opt out and schedule surgeries then


RougeAlexander

You've got the testical, rehabbing from that back injury, getting hit in the face and this behind the ankle one: The whole article is great, but behind a paywall so here’s the most interesting bit related to Haniger: > After the Mariners’ Mitch Haniger tested positive in mid-April, he had a fever and chills for three to four days with a slight cough and congestion. But then, as a secondary result of the virus, he got a sinus infection and experienced inner-ear pain that can cause vestibular issues.“I was having balance (issues) and dizziness for six weeks and didn’t feel back to normal till May,” Haniger said. “I sprained my ankle in my first at-bat back from the Covid IL because my equilibrium was still significantly affected. In my opinion, there’s no way I would’ve sprained my ankle if it wasn’t for Covid and the vestibular issues I got from Covid. I’ve never everted my ankle on a swing like that in my life.” > That ankle injury led to a twelve-week recovery that removed his statistics entirely from this study, yet his experience certainly seems relevant. After seeing a vestibular physical therapist, and rehabbing the ankle, Haniger finally feels 100 percent again. I think overall since they are almost all different issues he is worth the contract and has a reasonable likelihood to play more games during this next contract on average. Someone with multiple similar injuries is a much bigger concern. Example: Kyle lewis knee.


aggronStonebreak

The average value seems about fair, though personally I would have predicted some kind of option on the third year. Could see either side wanting out after two years if his value changed


NevermoreSEA

It's pretty risky when you consider how hard it's been for him to stay healthy over these past several years.


notareallobster

World series confirmed. We got our guy


CabinetChef

SF is getting a good player.


nrspinney

He’s such a Giant. Good for him.


jaykell6ix

Lol


Mjh1021

Match Haniger and Arson Judge


LEFT_FRIDGE_OPEN

Dudes only had 1 or 2 healthy seasons. Crazy money going around


FBoaz

Oh shit, didn't realize the Giants were linked to him.


scrapsbypap

Yup, he's been one of the big mid-tier signing ideas thrown around forever


FBoaz

I know I saw a number of teams interested in him, but I apparently missed the Giants among them.


tcsrwm

He grew up in Mountain View or somewhere around there. This looks like a good signing. Really hope he mashes and plays a lot for ya'll


SoggyToastTime

Santa Clara actually, I played in the same little league as him, he lived right down my street. Always excited to see him do well and super happy with this signing.


MinorThreatCJB

MID


PatientIndividual651

The Giants got their guy.


DP487

Is this that arson judge I've heard so much about


blondelebron

Hanigriffey :( I'm happy he's back home in Cali. I'm sure he will love and be loved in SF. Hani is one of the hardest working guys in baseball and always gives it his all. I'm going to miss him and his insane clutchness.


TheGhostOfSamHouston

😂 wtfffff


paddiction

Giants signing everyone this offseason


incredibad29

According to Heyman, Mitch Hanger has signed with the Giants.


StrongFefe

This is the worst thing to happen to me all day


Clarice_Ferguson

Oh, you think it’s for three years but really Mitch will be fine next year, lose his other nut in 2024 and then play again in 2025.


irelandn13

Heyooo!!


Qoppa_Guy

Haniger is a nice signing, but if Arson also goes to SF, is it more CF reps with some RF and DHing?


Tashre

Hell yeah! A team I can actually root for!


dcarsonturner

Heyman driving around San Diego desperately looking for San Francisco officials


Mossles

Seems like a decent signing


dont_yell_at_me

Wait you can sign more than one free agent? I didn’t know you could do that. Wth I’ll miss you Mitch


ReservoirGods

Fuck me, I'm gonna miss Mitch so much


dawgpack09

:( Good luck Mitch, I'll always appreciate your role in ending the drought


TheDestinedRonin17

Nice


[deleted]

That's a good deal if he even just plays 2 years


DJamB

Thanks for making good on your promise Mitch. Absolute legend.


dontthinkabtit

meetch 😢


KVirello

Giants fans: I want Aaron Judge. Farhan Zaidi: We have Aaron Judge at home. The Aaron Judge at Home: (Also Aaron Judge might be hiding in the cupboard)


CensoredForever

fuck


Im_scared_of_my_wife

Mitch daddy noooo!


ShellyDuncanFanClub

Really good pickup


muhammadtalha786

Am i the only one who doesnt want us signing judge