T O P

What if everything you thought as a kid suddenly became reality? [Language Warning]

What if everything you thought as a kid suddenly became reality? [Language Warning]

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unexBot

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Jehuty8434

That's fucked it


slightly85

It fucks that's


TheFilthyCasual69

That's fuck it


A____S____

Fuck it! That's fucked


Dry-Ad8891

Fuck that’s it


Mr1derfull1

Oh Fuck shit!


Dry-Ad8891

Maybe I will!


BenShapirosProstate

You busy?


alphawolfffff

Yep I didn’t read the username of the person I commented on and now I’m scared


BenShapirosProstate

Then get over here and destroy this tight little bussy


The-Archangel-Michea

Let's fuck!


[deleted]

Fuck the's it's! fucks


isurewill

Is that it fucked.


TT2JZ_Chaser

Only you can prevent forest fires!


[deleted]

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[deleted]

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grizzy008

Fuck it!


LetsGetNice

Fucks that it is!


klem_kadiddlehopper

That was a pretty clever thing for the guy to do.


Terrible_Tutor

This is comedy gold


G_Viceroy

It's about time someone did it


GatekeeperTDS

The dude sounds like Hank, Bill, Dale, and Boomhauer *all at the same time*.


iseeyou_Pi

I definitely heard a hank hill


Sufficient-Bug-9112

Definitely a kids logic


Shaneblaster

My dad also told me if I don’t turn off my bedroom light when I leave my room we’d be financially ruined.


TBGshxtALL-DAY

And that’s the truth, also don’t touch the thermostat, and close that fucking door when you leave we ain’t providing AC for every body in the got damn neighborhood Billy


poop_creator

My dad used to ask me “What’s his name?” whenever I’d have the fridge open too long. Because clearly I got a pet penguin if I’m needing to use the fridge for that long. So stupid, but obviously I use that on my fiancée now.


Love_God551

Ok, so what was his name


poop_creator

If you ask my dad, he would say “Ughh, really”


Love_God551

Haha


Mreugenehkrabs1

Our penguin was named Not Me


Background-Ad124

“Mumble” Thank you for the award The name is from the movie happy feet


Love_God551

Hey that’s a great penguin name


jettrscga

God I really hope people list some good pet penguin names. I could use some new pet penguin names.


MikeMcMichaelson

Slippy.


Embarrassed-Ad-1639

Sloppy, Slappy, Swanson, Samsonite! That’s it!


solidsausage900

We were way off


Love_God551

Couldn’t we all


attackonyourmom

Pen-Pen.


Physicle_Partics

Waddles Flippy Poopcannon 200X Tux


Fogjak

TUX


CaptainSprinklefuck

Ser Waddles


ActualWhiterabbit

Mine had, "it's not a tv" and sometimes the long version of "it's not a TV, stuff is not going to change by looking at it. Close the door."


tylanol7

Your not hungry your bored go outside


orangesfwr

""You're", Dad. It's "You're"." *::backhand::*


ineedcoffeealready

Yea, im using this one. Solid dad line


KikiParker88

I actually love this! That’s hilarious!


mtflyer05

You had A/C? We only got it when I was 15, because one of our farmer friends gave us a gigantic "swamp cooler" that hooked up to our hose and dropped the whole 3br house 5°F within 15 minutes of being on.


Phearlosophy

in dry climates, swamp coolers (evaporative coolers) can be way more energy efficient and easier to maintain than refrigerated air. I live in the desert southwest, and we have a swamp cooler as our only cooler. it works great and i can easily maintain/replace any part on it.


WatifAlstottwent2UGA

My whole family thinks I'm a lunatic but the power bill is $300 a month during the summer because the damn AC runs 24/7


bassmanjn

That’s cheap here in Ireland and we have neither AC nor warmth. I don’t know what’s wrong with this country.


KikiParker88

My long lost sibling! I’m glad I found you on Reddit!!


frezor

Protip: If you turn on a cab light in a car while it's moving everyone inside will die a horrific fiery death.


farawaydread

This one still affects me.


ChristineWhy

I don’t drive and honestly I’m afraid to turn it on while my spouse drives because my parents drilled it into my head when I was a kid that they couldn’t see with it on.


buttercupcake23

Wait you saying that's not true???


MortalVoiddDweller

Especially if it's an Uber at 3am


Nabber86

My dad told me every time I flushed the toilet it cost him a dollar for the water. As soon as he left the house I would go around the house flushing all the toilets.


jooes

There was a kid at my school who thought that it cost a dime every time you turn on a light switch. We were alone in a classroom one day and he just kept flicking the lights on and off in order to drive up the schools electric bill. Unrelated, but he's in jail now for trying to kill a bus driver. This has nothing to do with the story, but I feel like it's important to add it anyway.


SharkAttackOmNom

> This has nothing to do with the story [x] Doubt


Why_Did_Bodie_Die

"You don't understand. I only killed the bus driver because I knew it would cost the school more money to replace her"


themoochiest

Kid: *walks out of room with light on* Dad: “I’ll never financially recover from this.”


rompous_pompous

![gif](giphy|kC2cRqEt8o41COgjoV|downsized)


Vengefuleight

First time my wife and I lived together in an older home with central AC, we got a $400 bill in July and nearly shit ourselves. Your dad wasn’t wrong.


klem_kadiddlehopper

My adult son left lights on all over the house and I was the only one paying the electric bill. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr


WatifAlstottwent2UGA

Lights count for such a small percentage of your power anyway. Tell him to stop doing laundry ever day.


theghostofme

> Tell him to stop doing laundry ever day. Those crusty, bleach-smelling socks aren't gonna clean themselves.


ASVPcurtis

If he collected all the pennies he would have saved has the light been turned off whenever someone left the room he’d be able to buy a Ferrari. JK he’d be lucky if he could buy lunch. People like him need to smarten up.


totaltraash6773

I was expecting lava, lol


srira25

A couple of years back, some dumbass in the upstairs apartment unit forgot to close his kitchen sink faucet. It flooded his kitchen, dripped down through the floor, flooded our kitchen when we were out, dripped through our floor and flooded part of the apartment downstairs. Finally, I had to go and turn off that damn faucet because the guy was high af in his room 'next to the kitchen's and didn't even register what we were telling him.


Ya-Boi-69-420

Damn. That’s why we’re flooding. Bobby left the hose on. 😔


send-me-kitty-pics

Bobby is gon git the biggest ass whoopin when he gets back home here!


Ya-Boi-69-420

He goin clean up this whole mess with a shovel!


rayshmayshmay

Damnit u/Bobby!


TaffySebastian

​ ![gif](giphy|SHhUunfD9eSYURRoI4)


rayshmayshmay

“That boy ain’t right”


themoochiest

You beat me by 3 minutes. Have an award for being quick on the draw.


Sorry-Presentation-3

Fastest Hank in the west


Content_Half192

His propane and propane excesories are superior


Beepolai

*dangit


meatball402

Dang it bobby!


myleftnippleishard

r/bobby


erck_bill

7am and the boy ain’t right.


Shivshanks

that was legit funny.


sleepernick

I've been crying for 10 minutes straight laughing so fucking hard


[deleted]

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Crocodile_raper

Im jist curious, is your work environment stressful?


TNoStone

Lol it’s a copy pasta


dirtyfarmer

So... He just copies pasta at work. Huh weird job.


ShiningRedDwarf

oh no he cracked


TT2JZ_Chaser

oh yeah just add to the already flooded neighborhood i guess. sheesh


klem_kadiddlehopper

Are you still laughing? It's been 45 minutes.


sleepernick

Fuck yes


yojoerocknroll

man, don't invite this guy to a Bill Burr show. He might pass out.


sleepernick

100%


SueMaster7

I seriously don’t understand how people say they fucking DIE laughing for like an hour straight at a video or comment? Who the fuck does that.


Interesting_Welder27

Me. I do that.


skizzums0

This is very funny, but I wish I took a picture of my yard when my son left our unregulated hose line on for 9 days while we were out of town. It was a half foot deep, 1/3 acre of marsh. $1600 water bill that month


tabgrab23

Which belt did you use? Or maybe jumper cables?


skizzums0

Well, he was like 6, so just a closed fist.


tabgrab23

You’re babying that kid, he needs a taste of the real world (or leather)


Itsthejackeeeett

Ain't nothin wrong with that.


Dr_Daaardvark

Only $1600? I feel like in CA that’d end up being $5k or some shit.


_mach

i swear there's a much older version of this done by another person. It's funny either way of course.


OnTheEveOfWar

Yea this is absolutely hilarious.


DryMingeGetsMeWet

I've watched it 3 times. It's fucking hilarious. I'm gonna save it and hope I come across it one day when I'm depressed and contemplating suicide. It will save my life.


Top-This

Finding humor while experiencing one of the most fucked up situations in your life - priceless.


aceforest

Yeah surely he's much better than I am for having a good sense of humor in such a shitty situation.


missy_sunshine

he is


eye_booger

You’d be surprised how easily humor can sometimes come in crises. I think it speaks to the adaptability of the human spirit.


Scary_Pace6463

What do you mean 'humor' this isnt a joke, that godamn Bobby left the hose on and flooded the whole neighbourhood and you're find it funny /s


WillElMagnifico

For everything else - there's your nearest shelter.


RamblingVoicemail

He's done what he can - he turned the spigot off. What's left is to laugh about it


COL_PRIME_TIME

At least his living section is above the water by the looks of it!


kelsobjammin

Fucking Bobby.


telastruct

Went full Boomhauer at the end there.


Bumbleclat

Never go full boomhauer


satyrday12

Can he go 7/8 boomhauer?


Hank_Holt

Yes, but you can't go 5/7 Boomhauer.


GroceryScanner

Yeah, nobody is perfect


agoatonstilts

Even with rice?


AnonymousSmartie

Dang ol' Hank dang tellin' the truth bout that boy Bobby not being right, tell you he don't know how to housesit dang ol' left the damn spigot on for no got dang reason, dang ol' floodin' all o' Arlen.


WildSmokingBuick

can anyone sell me on KotH? never watched it, liked a couple of jokes (phoenix being a monument to man's arrogance) being from Germany I'd have to go out of my way to watch it though, and imdb got it at only 7.3 points


Oneg122

It is a a satire of American life that is like 3 levels deep and yet also one of the most funny (and simple) adult animated shows.


bluebeambaby

I once heard someone say that KOTH was the last mainstream show that both conservatives and liberals appreciate because it satires "both sides" in a way that reveals how much in common we all have in our day to day lives. I think it's pretty true, the people of Arlen are some of the most human characters I've ever seen in an otherwise silly sitcom.


russiabot1776

It manages to satirize without disrespecting the satirized.


Not_a_beluga

It's one of those shows that takes a few episodes to start growing on you. Definitely a fantastic show though.


Dustinktf

That boy ain’t right


bkline18

he is flawed


_tugguh_

He is not correct


MonKeePuzzle

just glad he said spigot and not the all to common spicket


telastruct

Or the less common... Sillcock.


EntMe

whatever floats your boat. No kink shaming here.


musashi_88

Unless kinkshaming is your thing. You dirty dirty boy.


[deleted]

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FunkMasterE

what about hose, bib?


qthis

*too


EjaculateEvacuator

Glad to see a fellow Arkansan hillbilly makin’ his way to the top. But the video cut short - cousin’s about to go find a apple switch.


NiteTiger

That would make this a tragedy instead of a comedy.


[deleted]

Oh no, we got sent to the willow tree, where the true instruments of torture lie. Get a small one, cuts and welts. Get a big one, well you're just a damn idiot.


AvengingCoyote

What happened to the good ole days when you got whipped with orange Hot Wheels tracks? Adding a touch of physcological abuse by being beat with your own toy. 🤌


[deleted]

They didn't have them yet when I was a kid, but my wife had that misfortune. I'd rather have a switch.


cadninja82

I don't care who ya are, that's funny right there.


visaul77

Nice little reference right there


BaconStrpz

I'm sorry but if you need a language warning so you don't click on quality content then get off the internet.


LivnLegndNeedsEggs

FUCK YEAH


onometre

what employer is actually OK with you spending time on reddit anyway lol


broccoli_meister

Who are you talking to? OP put that in because NsFw gets more clicks.


BillyWasFramed

This would be NSFW in some places. Whether someone should be on the internet at work is another argument altogether. Suffice it to say, if someone had a video with this language playing on their lunch break, there would be pearl clutching in some work environments.


jjusmc3531

God dammit Bobby


Upinmybuttt

am I the only one who loves when americans talk like that?


bahgheera

Am American, talk like what?


Upinmybuttt

like with a southern accent. I think there are quite a few people out there (maybe mostly non americans) who really like that.


yes_him_Gary

All else aside, it is a fun accent to listen to (saying as someone from small town North Carolina).


LifeStill

send em my way, I have a mild southern accent


LostJC

As someone who grew up in the south, it's like a red flag to me. I automatically assume someone's dumber if they have a southern accent. It's not fair, but it's what my environment taught me.


[deleted]

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Babblerabla

Georgian here, and I've started using my accent after years of hiding it because honestly it's the best accent in the country. People do think I'm dumber, but it's just fun saying something low key competent, progressive, or intellectual and blow their expectations out of the water.


[deleted]

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Babblerabla

Let us also remember that "y'all" is becoming one of the best ways to greet an ambiguous group of people!


Andre_3Million

Global warming? Nah Global Bobby.


another-donut

bobby is responsible for millions of deaths across the globe do to immense amount of flooding and weather changes due to global bobby


marcjz94

Waiting to see Butters dressed up as Professor Chaos


HitMePat

SIMPSONS DID IT


Nesquigs

He finally fucking did it


Alathiel

Last winter, Bobby left the refrigerator door open and the next morning there was 6 inches of snow outside. Kid never learns.


useles-converter-bot

6 inches is the length of approximately 0.67 'Wooden Rice Paddle Versatile Serving Spoons' laid lengthwise.


Ravenclaw_14

**[dramatic zooming in intensifies]**


FreeZedrIedpiZzaPie

Why is nobody mentioning his lack of shoes walking into that shit...?


BangBangPing5Dolla

Well la de da look a this fancy fuck having shoes. Bet you even grew up in a house richie rich.


LoboDaTerra

I’m saying. Flood water is often toxic and dangerous


littlemisskind

Yes. As someone who grew up in an area that floods I did have a mild panic attack. People seem to think just because it’s rural it’s fine but I can promise you no matter where it is flood waters are dangerous and you should not enter them if avoidable. Definitely worth ruining a pair of shoes for Edit: HE WALKS PAST GUMBOOTS!


Benjilehibou

Naked feets better.


huhIguess

...Are you saying he should've worn socks into the pond? Cause that's the sort of shit that gets you in trouble round these parts...


Phweak

His lack of shoes....? Like, his lack of shoes going *into* the water?


GoldFishPony

Yeah, if I’m stepping into water I’d rather be barefoot than get my feet soaked *and* ruin a pair of shoes.


IcelandicCartBoy

This ain’t a swimming pool though that’s flood water 🤨


BangBangPing5Dolla

Most spigots are potable water he should be fine.


ayallahz123

not even lying this was a genuine nightmare i had when i was 8-10 ​ i was in a garden behind a house i think my grandma said to fill up a bucket with the hose? i think its called so i turn it to the right and it starts filling but like its filling FAST so i go to turn it off i turn it to the left it stars filling it up FASTER and i scream HOW DO İ TURN THİS OFF my grandma says just turn it the other way around (by this point the place was pretty flooded) so i do that and you guessed it it starts filling up EVEN FASTER to the point whare the entire world is in water and i drown my main language aint english so i did not know what to call a few things sorry bout that and i don't remember the dream exactly becuse it was like 4 years ago


MisterDonkey

Did you wake up to wet sheets? Because this sounds like a pee dream where I would definitely be waking up to a soaked bed.


GRIMLOX367

Well that’s a bit of an issue.


aschapm

Is this anyone else’s thumbnail? Most unexpected posts get ruined for me because I see the reveal before I open them. https://i.imgur.com/6wotloi.jpg


AltDesign

I love all these running faucets during a flood jokes. The original was the best but these other ones are still pretty funny.


luks0na

u/savevideo


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dog_in_a_wheelchair

lol like an episode of Ed, Edd, and Eddy


honorablecoward

He's a better person than I am for having a good sense of humor in such a shitty situation.


Friscis

This is the original concept and a much funnier video https://v.redd.it/hwlxj3mj98q31


CreepingBeauty99

I mean, there are billions of people in the world. There's no such thing as an original idea. Quite possible that the dude making this video never saw this earlier one


hugglesthemerciless

what is it with reddit thumbnails and giving the joke away


MartianGuard

Hated that camera work


Interesting_Pea_5382

So, all he needs to do is to find the plug and pull it so it’ll drain 😧😮😲🥱


_yosoybeezel

😂


everythingisgoo

Goddangit


subpar30

Hahaha, brilliant


conconbar93

*FUCK*


GobiBall

Son!


BigWillis93

Dammit Bobby now the whole yards gonna turn to quicksand


AliceP00per

Water bill go brrrrrrrr