T O P
schuter1

Conversations about dicks hardly ever come out good.


CitrusFresh

Very hard topic, for sure.


GoonieMcfly19

You have to get a head of these situations


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Ninjalion2000

Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself.


Not-AdoIf-HitIer

And other times the problems not very hard at all


peepeebrigade

Once in a while, you just gotta suck it up though


KwokAndBirdLTD

You guys are being too soft. It's hardly like talking about dick size will lead to any major disfunction in the relationship


echo_vasc-sono_333

I agree, communication is how we erect solutions to the problem.


ianthrax

Sometimes its not our problem to solve. Someone should really let the gf that this is her load to bear, and if she isn't happy with his size, let him know. You would think she would want to get it off. Her chest.


crimson_chin_401

It can be a lot to swallow


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GaryBBenson

yeah that's a good point. I always envision people on reddit as full grown adults but this could very well be a 17 year old and that makes a hell of a lot more sense


[deleted]

Nah she's 21 lol.


onetwothree4ourfive

That *is* young, my guy.


Illustrious-Ad-5902

Still a little young tbh


random_boss

Eh under 25 it’s all the same naïveté


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cheekabowwow

Wisdom comes from seeing the consequences of your mistakes, not getting a free pass.


Repulsive-Positive30

Definitely one of those things you don’t say out loud but I see what she was trying to get across. It’s just not something worth getting across. She could have left it at, I will be happy with your dick forever. From, an extremely petite person casually dating someone with a huge dick. I hate it lol. Anals a terrifying thought with him. Rough sex (my preference) is painful. And I can’t have sex quite as often as I’d like. She meant well but very stupid of her to say it like that. Edit: to be clear, I’ve had my cervix bruised a few times by a “boyfriend dick” and no it’s not something I’m eager to relive.


Sonic_Uth

>It’s just not something worth getting across This exactly. Being able to make this realization is a hallmark of maturity, and was the first thing to tip off how young they are.


[deleted]

“He’d be lacking in a one night stand or fwb” that’s a put down , no way around it. She’s saying he couldn’t satisfy another woman unless it was long term. She would be disappointed if she had a one night stand with a guy his size. How are people missing that. She’s trying to neg him .


Peeka789

Unless hes willing to be a boyfriend his dick is too small to satisfy her. That's what she is saying. How fucked.


Zealousideal_Pool_65

Yeah definite negging. She’s trying to drop little digs at his ego to make him think he has to stay with her, or nobody else will want him. She may be laying the groundwork for cheating in future. To the person saying it’s overly fragile to think that way, not at all. I’m bulletproof to that childish shit — recognising someone’s shitty tactics doesn’t mean getting upset by them.


neverinamillionyr

Rephrased, she’s saying “you better have one hell of a personality (bank account, etc) because you don’t have much dick.” She’s very superficial and is quite likely to cheat on you to fulfill her big dick fantasies.


ayochaser17

Yea definitely meant well but shoulda kept it to her self. Not sure if this is the best or worst back handed compliment I’ve ever seen lol


Pain_Choice

I don’t have a dick and that hurt my feelings


CountVonGrouch

I’m not the OP and reading this made me insecure.


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Aden1970

Unless he asked about her about the extraordinary size of her v*rg*na!!! Which a gentleman would never bring up.


solidsalmon

A gentleman knows there are alternatives.


Atheist_PhD_Engineer

lol like the Curb episode when Jeff's ex said he had a small dick and when Larry brings it up to him he goes "no no, big vagina, HUGE vagina"


Bigturk420

Best fucking episode ever! When he’s walking around throwing his hands around mimicking a huge vagina? Classic shit!


[deleted]

There is a weirdly prevalent attitude that it’s OK to talk about or comment upon or even joke about a guys dick size but it’s completely taboo to make any reference to a woman vagina size or tightness.


genius-baby

I think it’s common knowledge that women vary in that department but the sexism comes in when people love to claim that the vagina stretches over time and especially aFtEr MoRe PaRtNeRs


TheNanaDook

> sexism comes in when people love to claim that the vagina stretches over time and especially aFtEr MoRe PaRtNeRs But no sexism in dick size?


ShowerHairArtist

I've told my hubby he is the perfect size for me. The end. No need to qualify that statement in any way whatsoever.


jakeo10

There was literally no reason to say what she did unless she fully intended to shame her boyfriend and to make him feel insecure and like utter shit. That and it says a lot more about her than it does about her BF tbh. Maybe it's time for a GF who loves you in every way, unconditionally. If you love someone you should never make them feel insecure, less than or like shit on purpose. Besides the occasional argument where people often say things they don't mean, to say something like OP GF did in normal calm conversation is a red flag tbh. "You can't un-ring a bell" as they say.


Dismal-Grass1313

I'm not the replier, but reading your comment made me second guess myself


cownd

Agreed. Not having such a discussion at all. You could call that a cursed conversation.


gray_2shades

I am a dick, and it hurt my feelings too.


Claytonius21

But are you a boyfriend dick?


justgossiping

No he's the wife's boyfriend's dick.


gray_2shades

Less than that even


ChineseChaiTea

Same here, I'm a woman and that stung...


dontbedumbbro

Damn bro.


vflavglsvahflvov

Ikr thats messed up.


ChaosSigil

This shit messed *me* up. Op. Ive been told the same thing...in different words...and, i don't want to be a downer but...i found out she messed on me with a few dudes. So. Idk im not trying to put thoughts into your head but, that's how it was for me. I'm only sharing my experience with a similar comment made about my size. Which was, "...you're a *grower*, not a *show-er*..." It was almost humiliating to hear this. I have always been self-conscious about my size, and this was breaking to my self-esteem. She obviously was trying to sound like she was complimenting me, but it certainly did not feel like it. And I believe this is the same situation for OP. Minus the cheating part. And i sincerely hope that OP's gf is not cheating on him. With all my heart, i really do. Edit: since so many people have taken a gander on this comment, I thought I should correct spelling and add some things.


expired_soy_milk

Shit man, I know you said messed in past tense but I hope you're ok now


trezenx

I don't know man, can you even recover from that? I think that shit would be in the back of my mind forever, with each new girl. Hell, I'm going to abandon this thread because it already starts growing on me


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goldenbugreaction

Man, I get what you’re saying, but folks gotta be careful about THAT too. Like… it’s less about opening up to one person, but opening up to the *world.* It’s full of beauty out there and we can’t be so afraid that we sacrifice one for the other. Maybe a better way to put it: people need to **also** be open to the *possibility of threats and danger,* just like anything else. Learning how to drive a car and learning to spot Narcissistic Abuse are kinda the same, and equally important... You gotta learn what the signs are telling you. Edit: grammar


minegen88

\- Does this dress look good on me babe? \- I would say u look like a "girlfriend" \- whaddaya mean? \- Well u know, i dont want guys to hit on you all the time and give you too much attention so that looks perfect! \*facepalm\*


DeadLikeYou

No, this is more like \- Does this dress look good on me babe? \- No, your pudgyness doesnt fit the dress. Its good for girlfriend material, but I have been with thinner women and those thin hips werent as easy to grip. But thats okay, because thats girlfriend fat, and I like that about you. Yea, its that big of an oof.


dang2543

I feel like this is the comment of a sane man. Now, let's look at the rest of Reddit Edit: thanks for the silver, kind stranger


Jag0089

How old are you all? Sounds like something someone in their early 20s would say...


[deleted]

Both 21. So you're right!


Jag0089

Lol not excusing her behavior, but I think as you get older and you’re in more serious relationships comments like this don’t get said. Seems like it was her weird way of letting you know she’s satisfied, but totally get why you would be bothered by it. I think just keep your eye out for any backhanded comments like this in the future, but I would try to let the wave of discomfort pass


montanacutie62

I agree. Seriously, you don’t know jack shit at 21. Try not to let it bother you.


debo16

21 year old me would have freaked out and overanalyzed like OP is doing. 30 year old me, says yeeeeeeaaaah perfect dick. It’s all perspective. She was maybe a bit crass, but she’s 21 also. 21 year olds are still pretty much morons.


Kermit-Batman

35 year old me is pretty much at [this](https://imgur.com/gallery/8QDSB) point with my dick. It's mostly a, you're doing your best buddy type thing.


saibot0_

Risky click


Toaster_621

I was afraid i was about to see a dick pic


Kermit-Batman

Haha I like to think I'd warn first! Ain't nobody got time for unsolicited dick pics!


tobi117

>you're doing your best buddy type thing. r/SuddenlyGay


zangor

I'm glad the OH you dog and guy is still alive. Its such a great image.


weatherseed

There are, as far as I'm concerned, three stages in every person's life. Under 21: Young, dumb and ugly. Over 60: Old, dumb and ugly. What's the 39 years in between the two? Dumb and ugly.


whatobamaisntblack

Am 21, can confirm


AndrewWaldron

30 yr old me recognized 20 yr old me didn't know shit. 40 yr old me recognized 30 year old me didn't know shit. Now I recognize I don't know nothing about nothing and neither does anyone else. We're all just talking out our asses and making it up as we go and hope no one else realizes we're full of the same shit and uncertainty as everyone else.


pillowwow

Kids are stupid man. When I was 21, told my girlfriend she had a little muffin top when she asked about some jeans. I thought she wanted to know. We say some stupid. Stupid. Stupid things some times.


Petsweaters

You both learned that day


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[deleted]

Would have hurt more if you said his dick seemed shorter.


AngusVanhookHinson

Similar story with a good ending: Walking through the store one day, my girlfriend picks up a pair of brown slacks, looked in the fly for a size tag, assessing whether she wants to try them on. I glanced - *glanced* -- over and said what came to mind: "those are going to make your ass look enormous". She was mad-not-mad, and we had a playful fight there in the store about "you said my ass is huge", and "no, I said those slacks will *make your ass look* huge. Those are not the same things". It really was playful and light hearted. She put them back, we finished our shopping, and left. Fast forward a week or so later and she's in a foul mood. She had been out to run some errands, and when she came back she was doing the little things - being aggressive with the dishes, being short with me, that kind of thing. So I asked her what's up. She hung her head and very sheepishly said "I tried on those slacks... you were right. They made my ass look huge". Oh, reader. *How I did laugh*. Not in a malicious way, of course. But it culminated in such a way as to look like it had been written for a sitcom. I explained to her why I was laughing so hard, and she finally understood, and we both laughed. We're still laughing about it 17 years later. We got married, and she's a pretty cool gal. She doesn't wear brown slacks, though.


Schfiftyfiv3

This is the perfect type of relationship in my opinion. Gotta be able to call it like you see it, and laugh about life.


[deleted]

Somewhere between 20 and 30 the don’t ask don’t tell policy takes effect


Fuckthesouth666

It honestly does sound like she was trying to compliment you/let you know she likes you and 21’d the hell out of it. Plus technique is way more important than size according to almost every woman I’ve talked to. If you really want to bolster your confidence though, study the Way of the Dancing Tongue. Nothing more satisfying in the world than leaving your lady in a fucking puddle


[deleted]

Even at 21 I don't remember anyone saying anything like this to me. It's super harsh even for someone that age!


sunshinehaze

Pretty sure this is from a show called too hot to handle


Shuuuuup

Holy shit. So now all of this buzz is from a stupid show she saw. But most of us don't know that so we'll take her more serious lol


truth_sentinell

Like exactly the same or just the boyfriend dick phrase?


jowick2815

The phrase and concept. I think it's episode 1 or 2 of season 1. Said by a dude called harry.


Chuffer19

That’s def where she got it from lol


Yashabird

Was “boyfriend dick” framed in any way positively in the show? It seems like theoretically it could be…if you discounted every single person in this thread’s reaction to the phrase…


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Yashabird

Haha ok makes sense


Timid_Adventurer

That show is so creepy and gross. At first I laughed along with it, like “ha ha yeah these people are a mess” but I’ve realized that no, they’re just rather shallow attractive twenty-somethings who enjoy sex. Meanwhile the show is very much “we say what you can do with your body” and “we will create such intense social stigma against doing what you want to do” in the name of preserving some people’s take on what ‘appropriate’ sexuality is. Just because it’s on a nice island doesn’t mean it’s not a televised re-education camp for people’s sexuality.


demonicbullet

Hear me out, the whole thing is scripted.


[deleted]

Are they attractive though? I think I’m too old. They just seem so broken and sad it’s hard to watch


susuchai

Not really. Some girls look like kardashian clones (ie plastic Barbie dolls; Kylie Jenner lips) and none of the guys are good looking (albeit nice physiques).


CoffinRehersal

Having had the unfortunate experience of seeing it I have a very different takeaway. The show is nothing more than a thin guise to show sexual encounters because sex sells. The people involved come off as only there to further their careers as influencers. To me the idea that a nefarious plot to re-educate and police peoples sexuality would take the form of a vapid television show that glorifies sex is laughable.


chrissssyyyy

Yup


Realistic_Rip_148

What a horrible thing to say and an even worse attempt at a recovery holy shit


james_frankie

Recovery is considerably worse


pringles_697

That's mean af, honestly. Why bring it up just to tell you that?


Htowncats

Dude ikr. My friend’s boyfriend saw a pic of her from ~10 years ago when she was 21 then asked who she was dating at the time. After that he started acting all upset and eventually said “man [10 years ago bf] got you for your hot years!” Uhhh wtf bro? What good could possibly come from saying that?!


canadian_air

*Smoooooth* r/facepalm


sadpanda___

smooth brain


Odditeee

I had a good friend who resented the HELL outta his wife for fucking another guy we knew, before they even met, because, and I quote: "She gave it up to him when she was skinny, and all I get is to fuck a fat chick." Glad that friendship (and marriage) are both over, for everyone's sake!


casual_creator

Ooof. I’ll be an honest asshole and say that I dated a girl (who I definitely thought was attractive at the time), but when I saw pics of her when she was in her early 20s, I felt a pang of envy because she was SMOKING HOT then. I felt bad about thinking that, but on the other hand, I think it’s sort of natural to think that, so long as you acknowledge people age and move on. But NEVER, EVER, *EVER* say that shit out loud.


lordp24

Your girlfriend fucked up big time my man. That’s fucking brutal


ExistentialDreadness

I feel like what she said is on the level of “you’re like a brother to me” garbage.


me_422

sounds worse than that


ExistentialDreadness

Talk about a low blow.


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ecidarrac

F


lambiechop

Holy shit. This is why in a relationship sometimes it is acceptable NOT to be honest. For fucks sake, what good can come of telling your bf you don’t like their penis size, or telling your gf her boobs are too small. COME ON. Are people that stupid? Or do they take a pleasure in mocking and making people feel ashamed of a body part they have no control over. Doesn’t even have to be a sexual body part. If it’s something they genuinely have no control over- eyes, nose size, skin color, etc. Just don’t fucking comment on it unless you’re saying something positive. And on the other side of the coin, don’t PRESSURE your partner into commenting their opinion. “Do you really, really like my boobs? Come on, I know you would be happier if they were bigger...” Don’t be asking a question that you don’t want to hear the answer to, but don’t fall for the bait. NEVER answer a question like this unless you want to sow seeds of frustration into your relationship. I swear it’s like some people genuinely are trying to get at their SOs. OP, I am so sorry your gf said such a gross and disrespectful thing to you. Does she always treat you with such disregard for your feelings? It’s time for a conversation with her. Evaluate if that’s the kind of woman you want to spend your time with. You deserve a woman who worships your dick (figure of speech), and makes you feel proud of your body. When you make love, you should feel completely comfortable and loved by the person you are with


Memsical13

Not even a year into my (now over) marriage, my husband told me he wished my boobs were bigger. It’s been over 10 years since that was said and that sentence still haunts me.


Cavaquillo

I don’t normally read through profiles but I did for you. Idk why, but I really empathize with some of your posts and hope for the best/wish you well. Life deals cruel hands, but I’m positive you, or anyone, can play them to their advantage.


waltznmatildah

I had a then ex boyfriend tell me I had pancake boobs. Still pops up every now and then to make me cringe and hate my body. *confetti*


SHIZA-GOTDANGMONELLI

My ex wife (while we were still together) told me she "expected more" due to my height. That one hurt for awhile :(


MrSteven1945

Cupcake is still cake my mans.


[deleted]

I didn't really pressure her though.. she brought l penis size up. She asked me what I thought about my own size then I just flipped the question back on her.


Totalherenow

That means she wanted to let you know. I'd watch this gf for negging - small insults to wear down your confidence over time. I dated a girl like that once, super hot girl, a model. She said something similar about my size. Anyways, she was poisonous and, since I'd dated a previously emotionally manipulative and abusive girl, I saw through her games and just dumped her. The cute girl I'm married to now is worried that I'm too big every time we have sex. I laugh because, well, that information is freely available online and I know I'm just average, but it feels nice. Be careful of the slow build emotional abusers my young friend. They're out to own you by beating you down. edit: threw => through


chromaiden

The reason she brought it up was so that you would ask her what she thought and she could put it all out there. Then if it upset you she could say “well you asked!” Sounds like she’s trying to make you feel bad about yourself.


lambiechop

Yeah, I didn’t mean you specifically. Just in general, I know people will pressure their SO into saying stuff like this and then be upset with them. I have personally made this mistake so I thought I would mention it. It seems like she was the one who brought it up and pressured YOU to tell her how you felt about your size. Maybe she didn’t pressure you, but that’s still such a stupid thing of her to ask.


Darrowday

Did your girl happen to start watching To Hot To Handle on Netflix? This exactly line was used by one of the guys on the first season I believe bragging about why he’s perfect for girls. He was using it as a compliment for himself. I’m definitely not saying it was smart on the show, and he was made fun of for it, and as a grown woman I’d never say that shit out loud to my boyfriend. I’m just wondering if she kinda said it as a compliment without thinking it through.


Real_Vents

What's worse is it sounds like they're treating their justifications, which are just excuses, as if it were a matter of fact and not *really* their opinion, but it is lmao. I don't see this relationship lasting, but I hope they figure things out.


a_QuarterRicher

I would give you gold if I could....well said👏


H2Joee

I did it for you. 🙂 also because the comment warrants it.


lambiechop

Wow thank you!


juniperroach

Feels like she was dying to tell you the way she set that up. She’s the insecure one.


egg_money

Right? It really does sound that way. Not sure why she said what she said other than to be mean.


Jemanha

Chipping away the other's confidence. That's how emotional abuse starts, continues into gaslighting: 'it was a joke-> I never said that' Edit: thank you for the hug


phil_davis

The Narcissist's Prayer: That didn't happen. And if it did, it wasn't that bad. And if it was, that's not a big deal. And if it is, that's not my fault. And if it was, I didn't mean it. And if I did, *you deserved it.*


egg_money

I definitely agree! Abusive people love to test the boundaries like that to get away with a little bit more each time. Even if OP’s gf isn’t abusive, why would anyone wanna date someone who makes them feel bad and shows no remorse about it? Hope he sees this as a red flag and leaves.


Petsweaters

Or she just heard that phrase and figured she would slip it into a sentence


[deleted]

Right it kind of sounds like regurgitating something she heard on a “sex positive” podcast to sound experienced


DeadLikeYou

It reads like a cosmo article. Ya know, the ones specifically designed to make the woman reading the garbage to lose their boyfriend?


Lifeissuffering1

Hahaha holy shit this ^


AberforthBrixby

This is one of those things that I'm sure a lot of people silently think, but know better not to say. The fact is, for a lot of people, we can't help but compare life experiences. That extends to our partners. Especially as you get older, your tastes and standards become defined by a long list of experiences that you either loved or hated in relation to previous partners. For some people, probably even many people, this will include physical attributes. Life isn't a romance novel. For 99.99% of people, no partner will be the absolute best everything you've ever experienced. They might be a better at communicating but worse with chores. Or they might be incredibly clean but hate cooking. And that's fine - relationships are built on compromise and learning to love people, rather than expecting them to be the best version of every quality you ever loved or were attracted to in previous partners. And it sucks to hear this if you're young, but that also extends to sexual intimacy. Once again, especially as you get older, you simply accept that most people have a dating and sexual history prior to meeting you. That history might include things that you can't or won't match up to. And again - that's fine. Society has conditioned us to put so much of our ego into our sexual performance, and as a result, sex becomes an increasingly performative task, where you focus less on mutual pleasure and intimacy, and more on looking good or coming off as talented. This is damaging to everyone, and reduces the experience to a shallow caricature of what it can actually be. So the takeaway here is that everyone has some kind of history, and you're only hurting yourself by trying to compare yourself and exceed whatever you imagine that history to contain. What that girl said was undoubtedly insensitive - there's no situation where it's appropriate to describe someone as "lacking" in that way - but what I want you to know is that you should try to avoid taking that concept personally. Whether or not the poor communication is grounds for splitting up is up to you, but try to remember that it's not your job to try and be some perfect model of human capability when it comes to your role in a relationship. Edit - there are a lot of people who are encouraging you to get even by coming back with some equally harmful comment on their body or personality. Don't do it. You'll never be better for it, and the concept of getting even in a relationships is one of the most toxic things you can double down on. Edit 2 - been seeing a lot of responses that I think misunderstand the intention of this post. OP is completely valid in feeling hurt. Again, what was said was insensitive, and I do not condone or defend it. It's not my place to pass judgement on the relationship, which is why I made no comment on whether they should stay or go. That's for them to determine. Ultimately, what I want to convey is that comments like this can be incredibly hurtful by their own nature, but also in part because of the power that we give them. We focus on the idea that we need to be better than our partner's history of partners in every way, physically, emotionally, mentally. This is unsustainable and only hurts us in the long run. You don't have to be the best in every quality that your partner appreciates. Accepting this takes back some of that power, and helps to prevent undue damage to your sense of self worth when you encounter criticisms like these. OP can't change what was said to them or how it made them feel, but they can position themself mentally in a way that may help them combat any resulting feelings of inadequacy or insecurity. This is what I meant by "not taking it personally" and "not comparing yourself"


[deleted]

I really appreciate the comment. The thing is I never compare myself to her exes or anyone else she's been with. I have never been insecure about my dick size or height or whatever. She will sometimes bring these things up unprovoked like a week ago with the penis comment. She brought up size. She's made a few comments about me being shorter than an ex. It's odd because she's great otherwise but she has some sort of comparison thing going on.


Here_Forthe_Comment

If she's bringing up these comparisons out of the blue, it means she's thinking about her ex's and comparing them to you. Thats not a good sign. Thinking about one night stands / ex's that were bigger does not sound good to just tell your partner that its better / her preference. It just sounds like someone who is thinking about other people and may cheat on you because you're not *that* preference. Imagine hearing from your girlfriend that you're good for a relationship but not a one night stand...that's not trustworthy. I think we all compare partners but if its something your current partner can't change or doesn't make a difference, you keep your mouth shut. Like other people have said, after dating someone who has made those comments and compared out of the blue, it ended with the discovery of them cheating.


Curlieqk

I agree that she's thinking about the ex's. Most people have a filter or conscience that keeps the comparison from actually coming out of their mouth. I don't think it's unusual to occasionally think about ex's (depending on the length of the relationship), but instead of saying "you're shorter than the other guys" or "your dick is smaller than the other guys" what you actually say is "I love how tall you are" or "I love your dick" or even -shocker- just "I love you"!


Here_Forthe_Comment

Exactly. If youre going to make a direct comparison, make it positive. "None of my ex's have planned a birthday party for me before! Thanks OP", or "youre the best cook I've ever dated". Its kind of weird to bring up sexual things (unless you're both okay with it) but there's no point speaking up about it if its negative.


sbenthuggin

The fact she doesn't say any of those things and instead makes comments like, "well it's perfect in the long term" makes it sound like she's trying to justify being with him rather than thinking about how much she loves those traits about him.


AberforthBrixby

I'm glad you got something out of it. I would also feel hurt in the face of those comments, make no mistake. Unsolicited comments of that nature are difficult to deal with at best, and traumatizing at worst. More than anything else, whatever you decide to do in order to move forward, I hope you find contentment and closure. Don't let your sense of self worth be damaged by this. Truly wishing you the best.


[deleted]

Nah man that isn't at all how someone loves you acts, comparing to exes is so So so wrong, that too multiple times, leave man, I wouldn't say just on the penis comment but over all comparison, she is not someone you would be happy with in the long run


GBronz

Now here is a good complete answer! Good job.


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[deleted]

Ya its like there is only one answer to "does this dress make me look fat", say anything else and you will put insecurity in her head.


poppypoppipoppy

Wow this was touching..


Kaffy89

If you were feeling petty, you could tell her she’s gf pretty; pretty enough so that you’re not embarrassed to tell ppl y’all are dating but not petty enough to worry about other males hitting on her. But that would be stooping to her level…


[deleted]

Lol not gonna lie that's a hilarious suggestion.


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Salt_Air07

That’s not an insult though, that’s just the truth.


throwaway10984733

The best insult is the truth.


MagikSkyDaddy

stings as it cuts


[deleted]

Well, that's a very cunning way to emasculate a guy; call him adequate. Merely adequate. Nothing remarkable. Not special. No wonder the OP is devastated. She couldn't have killed him more surely if she stilleto'd him in a kidney.


NeFace

Literally. My other half hypes up every single thing about me. She makes me feel like I’m the strongest, smartest, funniest, bravest, handsomest, creativest and biggest dickest man on earth. Even shit she’s not fond of, like I’m wearing that poor fitting shirt she doesn’t really like or growing a beard, gets hyped up. **Don’t settle for people who think you’re merely adequate.**


SleepyFields

What's wrong with the name Biggus Dickus?


ms_eleventy

Not every thought needs to be spoken out loud. This is definitely one of those thoughts.


slangpueblo

Oh yikes she got a lil bit too comfortable with that comment


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Darrowday

Did your girl happen to start watching To Hot To Handle on Netflix? This exactly line was used by one of the guys on the first season I believe bragging about why he’s perfect for girls. He was using it as a compliment for himself. I’m definitely not saying it was smart on the show, and he was made fun of for it, and as a grown woman I’d never say that shit out loud to my boyfriend. I’m just wondering if she kinda said it as a compliment without thinking it through.


totalleycereal

I could totally see someone in their early 20s watching that scene and being daft enough to regurgitate that descriptor to their bf without considering the greater implications and repercussions.


MiloTheGreyhound

Perfectly average grip and depth


BoofinBart

….and finish with “but for a wife, it would be a bit lacking.”


TrancedOuTMan

>She said that it's the perfect size for a long term relationship but for a one night stand or a casual fwb it would be a bit lacking. Holy shit dude... if she really said that, that's incredibly disrespectful... What the fuck does that even mean? If you were a one night stand she'd be disappointed in your dick? Wow that's fucked up man. Your GF sounds like a total bitch to be honest.


ReverendAlSharkton

Jeeesus bro. It’s a great daily driver but on the weekends I wish I had the Porsche. I don’t see any coming back from this tbh, I would peace out for sure. That’s a really shitty thing to say and based on how the convo went it’s like she was eager to tell you.


mediaogre

There truly is a car metaphor for everything.


mene3381

Car metaphors are like cars. You’ve got trucks, SUVs, vans, sports cars, sedans, compacts, etc. Whatever your need, there’s a car for that.


BMXTKD

Tell her now you have an ex boyfriend dick.


skizim80

Next time she asks or insecure about her weight tell her she's perfect girlfriend weight. See how that goes down.


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SpentFourRacks

Dude is out for blood lmao


WeightliftinElephant

Why would anyone say something like this.. thats messed up. Seems like she deliberately said this to bother you? Not sure why youd say something like this, especially if you are satisfied. And if youre not satisfied, its not something you can change so again..why say it


Heshboii

That’s fucked up


edwardcantordean

I don't understand why she would say anything about your size one way or the other. She sounds like she isn't very grown up. I realize she's 21, so I suppose that makes sense. When I've had partners who are not super well endowed I never said anything like that. It's tacky and rude. She could have told you she liked your size without qualifying it. Or she could have shut up.


Substantial_Escape92

As a female, I’m damn sorry dude. I thought we all knew better by now. Sheesh


mikeg5417

Ask her which of her body parts would she be OK with you describing as "lacking" in any context?


[deleted]

Gold!


EdwardBleed

Right? You have girlfriend tits/ass - ~~good enough~~ fine for like, you know, daily sorta stuff, but yeahhh def not the tits/ass I’d want in a one night stand. Sounds kinda fucked up huh


GrandmaSlappy

Fyi I'm in the middle of a divorce with my ex husband or 16 years and I still have not told him I think his dick is too small. Because that's not a thing you do.


istvan225

You only tell a man this is if you want him to commit suicide and ruin him.


bombbodyguard

I had a long term fling in college and we both liked to take shots at each other for “fun.” She hit me with a soft pecker joke once and it’s been 15 years and I still have to remind and pep myself up from time to time on that one. Ha. You got me good, bitch! I miss that girl.


ChoiceFabulous

Why would she bring up your size in the first place? Like she was deliberately setting out to belittle you.


Forge__Thought

Sounds like she might not have... a girlfriend personality? Or communication skills. But if this is just one interaction that was like this it's not be fair to judge her based on it. Honestly not everyone has presence of mind when talking about things like this. And sometimes we all can say things without considering how they affect others. If it's bothering you this much I'd have a heart to heart and see how she takes you being open emotionally about the situation. If she handles it well, good. Work it out. If it's a dismissive situation where she blows it off or demeans it bothering you. That tells you what you need to know. But don't go in mad, communication about hurt like that needs to be balanced and respectful. Relationships are tricky. And communication is tricky. Healing takes work.


Yo0o0o0o0o0

She’s got ex girlfriend personality


pay-this-fool

She’s been reading too much Cosmopolitan. Thats the kind of shit you read about but never hear anyone actually say. Plus what kinds of dick is she talking about that requires prep and recovery? I wouldn’t be too jealous of that. You guys sound young. When you get older that stuff matters way less.


tdl432

Totally. Sounds like Ike something you would come across in one of their "quizzes".


jess_bandicoot

Yeah her whole reasoning is bullshit. Also it‘s true, when I was 20 my ex bf loved to tell me how average I was. Shit stopped as soon as I started dating more mature people.


IGuessThisIsFine91

Tell her she has a one night stand personality and dump her ass.


chevsilverradbro

Sorry buddy. Bail.


existentialbarbie

Definitely tell her it bothered u man. I’ve made jokes about “boyfriend dick” intending as a compliment, like your penis is literally the perfect size for me. It would have never occurred to me that it would cause further contemplation or like suggest anything negative. I don’t know, I’m glad I happened upon this post. Seems I needed awareness


closeddoors

I thought the same, but she apparently said it would be lacking for a one night stand... That makes no sense to me, if it's perfect it's always perfect


existentialbarbie

Agreed. My partner really is the perfect size for me, and that was true the first time we hooked up and it is still true now ;)


closeddoors

Same here, high five!


Happy-Zone-8495

I'm pretty sure that's what she meant, she just ended up overexplaining and wording it the worst possible way. If my gf told me this I'd think the clumsiness is hilarious. Or maybe she did mean to put him down, who knows, we weren't there. It's really all in the tone.


Public_Leek_7406

Bruhhhhhh


Playful_Art_5364

Yeah I’d break up with her after that. The fuck


[deleted]

Your girlfriend hurt my feelings today.


crysadaboutit

Bro gtfo, im sorry but ive been there done that with the backhanded compliments. It will progressively get worse and just keep building until you don't even know who the fuck you are anymore. Please please don't let someone like that get there claws into you, it fucks you up long after they are gone.


Sen_Brahl

She should have kept that to herself and just concentrated on the relationship.


echoes_HD

User name checks out


FoulTarnished124

I'll never understand why some women think it's fine to say stuff like this


Iliopsis

Bodyshaming is ok but only if women do it apparently. Fuck her


anthonypt123

Walk away from this one buddy because it will only get worse from this point. Any person who can talk to someone like that is actually insulting you and testing what they can do and how badly they can treat you. The problem is not what she said (which is bad) but that she’s trying to put you down and keep you there.