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Southern-Squash9645

I once invited someone I was chatting with for a while to my place, we connected pretty well online and I wanted to have sex. Before the date I took a shower, did my nails, my hair, my makeup and cleaned my place, light a candle and put it on the table. He arrived wearing dirty clothes, smelled like he didn't take a shower in a week, had long dirty nails and awful breath. I never saw him again, neither had sex with him that day, and I felt so offended I actually told him that's the reason I'm not in the mood.


dearthofkindness

I read so many comments before yours that talked about ball washing that I first read yours as, "took a shower, did my balls, my hair, my makeup-" And thought, 'a man who wears makeup? Confident, interesting, I wonder what kind? Cover-up?'


Southern-Squash9645

Lol you actually made me laugh:p


funkepitome

Good. They should know. No more coddling grown-ass men.


apathetic-taco

A-fucking-MEN!!!


blondrizzl

NOPE!


strawberry_nivea

I had to go back to dating after being married for a decade, and all of the time I hooked up with guys (I'm female) I receive bed compliment on my smell and cleanliness. I asked if really some girls just show up unshowered? I was told that yes it happens a lot. So both sides apparently don't think it's essential to shower before being naked with someone.


GrassCandle

Bad hygiene absolutely goes both ways. There is nothing more deflating than realizing your partner reeks below the belt as you’re ready to go down. Do I stop? Do I tell her? How do I pivot to a different form of intimacy after being down here for just 10 seconds? It’s one thing if you spend the entire day with your partner and are aware that neither of you have had the chance to freshen up, but it’s an entire different thing when you meet them in the evening when there was ample time to get ready. If it was the first intimate experience, there most likely will not be a second. I feel like I take it personally because I would never allow a partner to go down on me if I haven’t had the chance to clean up. It just feels like they don’t care about me when it happens.


Odin_Christ_

But wouldn't you be embarrassed to show up to a sex date smelling like vinegar ass and fish???


WelshRugbyLock

Fish and Chips ?


Sirnando138

Man. I scrub my balls every single day in case my wife gets in the mood. Sometimes twice in the summertime! Maybe that’s one of the reasons we’re still married. Edit: haha. What? For the record, I wash my balls for ME as well!


slovakgnocchi

Just today I've heard about something gross. A woman was complaining that her husband doesn't wipe and he sprinkles his shit crumbs from his cheeks on the bed. She doesn't see when but ends up laying in them. Oh man, thanks for the normal people like you who know what hygiene is.


benrsmith77

I used to work with a young women who was newly living with her boyfriend. I forget how but conversation got round to boxer shorts. She complained about skid marks and made a comment suggesting it's just a thing that everyone has. I must have looked horrified as she said "Oh come on you must have them..." I replied that no I don't. Mainly because I am not 4 years old and have the ability to wipe my arse properly. She must have had some rank boyfriends.


Tiddleywinkz69

I've been told by an "old school man's man" that skid marks are a rite of passage for men. Blech I was like thank fuck I'm gay then


ComradeTrump666

Bidet is your best friend. If I just wipe, I just feel sticky and icky specially during hot humid summer.


SeraphiJade

Bidet is a godsend for a lot of reasons. I suffer from frozen shoulder and when it flared up it would make the simple act of wiping your ass a challenge and I could never get completely clean before we got ours. Now all I need to do is blot up the water afterwards. I wish that I could see them in US public bathrooms more often for that reason.


lovelypeeps

Large water bottle does the same. Arabic culture considers it atrocious to not wash after pooping. They also must rinse the head of there penis after peeing. They also sit down to pee even men because it splashes back when standing


[deleted]

“Shit crumbs” god I’m gonna puke


ItzBoogieMan

Dried shit crumbs lmfao


ThePeoplesAmp

i think that’s be dried dingleberries


ajhart86

Dingleraisins


Extension-Call2855

i wish i could unread this


bearsongs

OK I just have to say that this is the most cursed shit I've ever read but it did make me laugh for way longer than it should've. Holy shit, wow.


dedoubt

>sprinkles his shit crumbs JFC. First time I found out someone I was with didn't clean their ass after shitting, I'd be out the door. On that note, bidets are magical and everyone should use them.


fierce_history

There is no curse in Elvish, Entish, or the tongues of Men for this treachery."


kiwichick286

Why doesn't he wipe? Can you imagine...oh my god I'm feeling nauseous


angryfluttershy

Oh God no. No, no, no, no! (´ж`ς)


34Heartstach

Same man. I don't always shave down there but my crotch is a must-wash after I work out or before bed each night. I can't imagine not doing that and then being mad when someone doesn't want their face all over it. Edit: PSA - Washing your butt has no effect on your sexual orientation and vice versa. Also, from some of the comments I've gotten, more of you need to wash your private, sweaty parts more often.


emikokasumi

this is how I feel, but I'm a woman lmao. I don't want anyone touching me unless I'm clean


austinmiles

Not to mention just drops of pee, Poop molecules, etc. there’s a lot of general unpleasantness happening in one area during a normal day. I think I’m going to go take a shower.


Sweet_Taurus0728

Really though. It's just basic consideration to bathe before fucking. *Especially* if you know head will likely be involved. Her husband's a dick. And a smelly one at that.


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TofuttiKlein-ein-ein

I loudly proclaim, “I AM GOING TO SHOWER NOW!”


bellazezinho1

Good for you! My friend works at a waxing place. She tells me histories of customer’s privates smelling so bad, that it is hard to get her job done. she does wear a mask, but it doesn’t help much. Sometimes she has to walk out of the room for few minutes to get fresh air. The spa owner has even installed a special air/ventilation system.


Massive_veiny_clit

Drs and nurses put drops of things like peppermint oil in their masks to help deal with bad smells, maybe that’ll help her?


bellazezinho1

I will share it with her. Thanks.


youtubecommercial

Double mask with a strip of vicks between the two near the nose


Snyz

Who cares enough about appearances and hygiene to do body waxing, but can't bother to shower? Some people's priorities are seriously and truly baffling


missgork

That is so fuckin nasty...props to your friend for being able to do the job. I have trouble using public bathrooms because I hate the smell of the unwashed cooch crotch rot that is in there sometimes. It makes me nauseous, like dry heaving nauseous. I could never do that kind of job. Maybe she could give me some tips so I don't dry heave. And who in the world doesn't wash up, I mean really wash up, before going to an appointment to get oneself waxed? I bet those people don't even know that they smell like they are dying and rotting from the inside.


bellazezinho1

I think most people can’t “smell “ themselves. They think they don’t smell.


petewentz-from-mcr

That is so confusing to me! Like if I go take a piss I will notice if I am sweaty, I couldn’t not. Like I notice when my deodorant is failing me too. How can people not smell that? I mean I have a tendency to put soapy water on a paper towel and try to not have my leg armpit smell sweaty when I can’t shower which is probably more than you can expect from people, but just not being able to smell it?? Like you go to take a piss and it’s out. How can you not notice if you smell sweaty.


AlohaWorld18

Thanks in behalf of wives around the globe


KittyGrewAMoustache

And wives whose faces are around the globes.


D13s3ll

Do people not wash their balls?


Linubidix

I think the more uncommon thing is to not wash your foreskin. I assume, or hope, that washing your balls is an automatic response when you're under the water. If I'm having a lightning quick shower, then I'm basically scrubbing my armpits, balls and ass. They're the essentials.


Platzycho

I wash my gens every Day and I'm single as FUCK. I Just like to keep myself clean


Xcution_Unknown

I try my best to not stink and I'm not in any relationship... Edit: you guys are upvoting this comment too much, cut it out. I consider not smelling like shit and not thrusting my dirty junk in people's faces a common courtesy, AND WILL NOT ACCEPT APPRECIATION FOR HAVING COMMON DECENCY!


cherryblossomzz

Haha, my bf is the same way. He often can 'sense' that I'm gonna give him head and will wash up in anticipation, which is nice.


drewcifervi

Hell yeah. I bet your dick smells good, bro.


green_seb

Smells of success.


Nordrian

I mean even if I wasn’t married, I washed my junk fully every day because… hygiene? I mean … yeah…


LydiaAuguste

Facts, the amount of comments saying about how sex is their motivator to be clean, and not for own self hygiene is alarming lol


Defiantly_Resilient

Lol i was thinking this same thing! But really, whatever gets you in the shower works lol I've had this issue. Where we were getting busy and things were not....fresh. I ended up gagging and unable to finish. At which point I was like, do whatever you gotta do but I'm out. I gave it the old college try lol fuck that


Nordrian

Yeah… I mean, the penis isn’t the only part that stinks! Everything needs a daily wash!


Barlukyplay

lmao i wash my balls every single day and i dont even have gf. i just like when my body is clean


Competitive_Classic9

That’s probably the main reason. It’s the little things.


Nothingistreux

Wow I thought I was the only one. Unexpected fellatio, the best kind!


Volkrisse

Wax/trim and wash. Best decision I’ve made to get more head more often


adjust_the_sails

Yeah, but do you wash in your bootie crack? That’s where the truly bad stuff hides.


Svartanatten

Sounds about right! I am alone, isolated with "my girl" beeing stuck in another country. I'm a drug addict battling mental illness, depression, panic disorders, eventual autism (5+y in que, hail socialist medicine!) and whatnot... I still keep my D clean. And it's been years since I actually got a BJ. But I thought cleaning the D was routines for any sane man. I mean even if I gotten bad BJs.... A bad BJ is still a good thing... And while I'm out of the dating game I don't get why someone would not clean their D...


PuppyButtts

THANK YOU. Extra scrub the gooch because man it stinks so easily, I feel like most guys don’t know this bc they cant actually smell it but like..damn


FastRunner-

This should be obvious....As a dude, I always makes sure to be at the top of my persoanl hygiene if I'm hoping for sex to occur. I wouldn't expect anyone to get physical with me in less I'm all showered up and clean.


StupidFatMidget

Right? I will never understand these people. I'm a gal and I don't want my man anywhere near my naughty bits, or the rest of me for that matter, if I'm not hygienic. Its respect for self and the other to put forth effort to make the whole experience more enjoyable for both parties. How do you end up married if you dont grasp this basic concept? Beats me.


Sensitive_Wheel9203

It might sound shallow, but if I’m dating someone and the first time we have sex they didn’t make any effort to be clean/hygenic, like simply showering or at least freshening up in the bathroom right before, then I lose interest almost immediately.


mixoman

I feel the same way. I think it’s a red flag. If they’re making that little effort the first time, when they should be worried about making a good first impression, why would I expect they’d start showing effort in the future? When people tell you who they are, believe them, and assume they aren’t going to appreciably change.


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petewentz-from-mcr

I don’t understand… if you wear jeans all day and do anything that involves regular movement your leg armpits are going to be sweaty. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that. I would deadass wash my shit in the goddamn sink before I’d ever consider letting someone disrobe me while I’m sweaty. I’d be mortified. Why was she not mortified????


T0astyMcT0asty

Seriously. It doesn’t mean you have to wear fancy cologne or anything, just get some decent body wash and deodorant and shower at least once a day. It’s not hard.


the_paulus

I don’t like getting physical with myself if I’m not as fresh as an Irish spring. On a more serious note I can’t climb onto my bed if I don’t shower. I get into some really filthy places so even if I simply step out to get food I feel the need to shower before going to bed.


Crunchy__Frog

It blows me away, from a number of posts I’ve now seen on Reddit, how astoundingly atrocious some dude’s junk maintenance is. Get your shit together fellas.


Bcmcdonald

I will do virtually anything my wife asks of me if it will end in me getting a blowjob. Just cleaning my junk? Pfft. Best news I’ve ever received!


[deleted]

"Honey, go wash your balls so I can suck your dick." "NO!" "Fine then."


n8loller

Lol imagine saying no to that


cherrybombdotcommie

Lmfao my ex did multiple times. It blew my mind.


wiltedletus

Right?


ItsGettinBreesy

HAHA, this is me. My lady hinted at the idea of sex but said that she had to fold laundry, load the dishwasher, and shower first. Whilst she was in the shower I folded the laundry and loaded the dishwasher. Horny men are dangerous


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ItsGettinBreesy

As long as she plays my violin, she can play me like a fiddle any day of the week!


WritPositWrit

LOL I’m sure she acted surprised too.


yeehaw1005

Acted being the operative word lmao


Bcmcdonald

Preach!


4toTwenty

i had that convo with my ex. he turned it around by saying i should tell him and let him know. i told him if he wants his dick sucked then he needs to wash it on his own accord. sometimes you just gotta tell em


not-my-proudest

I have. He even said earlier he wanted to do stuff and I said he needed to wash his duck first. He knew. So when he asked me why I wasn’t into it and I told him the smell is turning me off, I don’t know much clearer I could have been.


bennythejetrdz

His duck. Hehehehhee


Tats_and_Lace

Im imagining some poor dude, with a tub of water and a duck in the yard. Frantic and frustrated yelling "It won't wash, honey!! Its made of contempt and the water just rolls right off! "OmG I'm trying, just gimme more time!"


The-Berg-is-the-Word

QUACK QUACK MOTHERFUCKER


Jaded_Tooth8459

I try to place myself into the mindset of someone who doesn’t bathe regularly enough, or who puts not getting a BJ above a simple wash, and I just can’t do it.


ParsleySalsa

I feel like as he is a grown man you should not be telling him to maintain a basic standard of hygiene. Washing all of the body and cleaning the mouth is basic. I'm willing to bet he's very childish in other areas of his life and relationships.


Akanekumo

Yup, please let know when there's something like that. I brush my teeth regularly and correctly, but my boyfriend told me I had bad breath...bought some mouthwash and it is significantly better. Sometimes even if you think you do everything right, you can have a little thing here and there. I am very grateful for him to have told me because I am very talkative and I wouldn't want people to be uncomfortable because of my breath if I talk that much.


hunnyflash

I feel kinda bad about this lol I had a FWB who had the worst breath sometimes, but it was like a bodily thing, because his semen smelled that way and his penis smelled kind of the same. It's weird because I never noticed his breath when we were just friends, and his body didn't stink, but the first time I gave him a blow job, it was kind of overwhelming when he came. Then after, I would smell his breath sometimes and it smelled just like his semen. Pretty sure it was his diet of Mountain Dew, Taco Bell, and cigarettes, but I never told him.


Akanekumo

Oof...yeah that kind of diet could definitely be the case. I learned that semen's taste and odor is defined by the diet as well. So yeah, that would be it... I do have a pretty balanced diet, so really I think I did everything good but still have a bad breath. It just is.


skydanceris

It might be stomach related like some reflux. It makes your breath really ugly.


DeadlyYellow

Medicines that cause dry mouth do as well.


EsseElLoco

The odd reminder can be fine for sure, but too many boys expect their partners to also be their mum. Might as well wash their balls for them at this rate.


wiltedletus

Yup! Mine whipped his out and it was covered with cotton underwear fuzz balls and blech. He was happy to wash it and get a blowie.


hardcoresean84

I never had a problem with that, my ex would say 'you taking our son to school today? Wash your willy when you get back'. 'Why?' 'I want to suck it' 'ok'


TenaciousTack

I had a friend that would lose his fucking mind if you told him he needed a shower. "I DO SHOWER!" As he continues to shower once or twice a month, sometimes less. Talked to one of his girlfriends who said she'd had to literally bribe him to take a shower. And here I am scrubbing my bum and balls once or twice a day/every other day. Shits wild.


Bratskin

How do people like that even get a partner?


TenaciousTack

I asked myself that question more times than I can count.


WoodyAlanDershodick

I had**** a friend like this too. I gave him TWO. long and intensive talks about his hygiene and how bad he smelled. Also, he was massive and massively overweight. He was one of these ultra rare types that didn't produce whatever kind of sweat gives your BO under your arms, and by his own admissions, after sweating his butt off at some dance party rave in the desert, realizing he didn't smell afterwards, just stopped showering, because "he didn't need to." He mentioned this casually months after the second talk. Meaning he never listened or internalized anything I said, continuing to believe he was BO free despite never showering, with a rock hard unshakeable foundation for this belief. He didn't have that underarm BO but instead just smelled like mildewed musty garbage and fucking swamp ass x 1000. It was the worse when he say up and his butt crack was exposed. I finally had to cut him off because my car would take 2 or 3 weeks to air out and not smell like an animal died in there. I ran into him recently and he had yet another fully dedicated hot young girlfriend. I don't get it. And im a woman, I really don't get it. The only thing I can come up with is that he's a total extrovert narcissist and I think people are drawn to that, because it cuts down on dealing with bad emotional baggage. When people don't take things personally, it just makes them so much easier to deal with.


trolpy

Maybe this hot girlfriend just hasnt recovered yet from coronavirus.


cosmicmew

Oof. I had covid over 6 months ago now and still can't smell :( I always make sure I'm extra clean since I can't smell lol.


greykatzen

Shockingly, almost nobody stinks at Burning Man; it must be some combination of the dryness and the alkalinity. I went one year when the playa had only barely dried out in time (was still wet half a foot down) and holy hand grenades but we all REEKED by day 3 of camp build. Thankfully, it dried out enough to kill the stench before the official gate open so I didn't have to deal with dance parties full of swamp hippies.


WoodyAlanDershodick

Gilded you, because YES exactly this. I was shocked when he casually mentioned it as his justification. I mentioned this is another reply, but there was other stuff going on. He had an rx, or multiple rxs, for benzos and abused them to shit. So benzos specifically mess up your memory.... So the rest of us go to sleep every night and during the sleep everything we learned during the day gets baked into our longer term memory, but not if you're benzoed out to the moon! So all those talks just rolled off his back and he literally would just not absorb those lessons, those memories. At least not in any kind of emotional, conscientious sense. I mean, the reason you take drugs like that is to not deal with unpleasant realities. And it just became too much. Too many issues like that. It's kind of like those people who naturally, genetically don't feel any pain. Sounds great to the rest of us, but they also have broken bones, serious diseases, no idea of an injury or how severe it is because they can't feel that pain that should alert them and force them to deal with it. Drugs numb you to healthy anxieties, healthy feelings of disappointment, and shame... He was also most definitely a narcissist. Which I say in a neutral way. It's a plus, because it means they have this easygoing aversion to risk and aren't super hindered by what others might think or do... And they're always seeking social validation, social interaction, aren't afraid to solicit and take full advantage of help... But again.... With that courage comes recklessness, with that ease of accepting help also comes shameless using and being a parasite. He's about 40 by now and I think the fact he can't and doesn't hold a job, moved constantly, and goes thru friends and girlfriends quickly and often, says a lot. A lot of people are drawn in by the ease of interaction, but then they all get burned or burned out and overwhelmed within a short period of time.


TenaciousTack

Jesus. I just don't get it. Must have some sort of allure. Any talk I tried to have with said friend ended in him getting super heated, punching shit ect. So I kinda just took my leave. No stench quite like an Italian man who never showers.


VladPatton

THAT’S the real question…holy fuckin shit.


admoo

We haven’t seen pictures of said partner….


TenaciousTack

This dude woul pull girls left and right back in the day. He did (and pretty much still does) fit the typical emo boy esthetic.


PNWPeridot

Seriously so nasty. I'm at my parent's house for a while and need to share a bathroom with my brother. I have not seen his toothbrush/toothpaste or bath towels move ONCE in the two weeks I've been here. I swear he only uses it to take a shit or puke. He's 32.


TenaciousTack

I just don't get it. This same gent never did brush his teeth either because "it hurt" so instead he just did nothing. Not even mouth wash. Also drinks milk with sweet coffee creamer at a 1:1 ratio.


Taurol

I used to be a freak about hygiene especially when it comes to sex (I mean I still am I just don’t think it’s weird anymore it’s normal to wanna shower before sex or at least lee some baby wipes if your partner doesn’t wanna hop in the shower I can wipe my junk real quick make sure there’s no sweaty balls in her mouth) but damn when I was about 20 I was dating a girl who was 18, and I don’t think she was very sexually experienced because, well she didn’t wipe her ass that great. It was like I had to find excuses at first to be like yeah let’s shower (luckily it was summer when we first got together and here it’s HOT 100° F from may-august) and would get her back REAL SOAPY. Truthfully, I am an ass man. And it was just a bummer (no pun intended) to not be able to hit that shit doggy style without getting a whiff of straight up SHIT. So one day we went to the store, and I threw some flushable baby wipes in the cart (yes they make actually flushable wipes, they tear and degrade really easy, they’re expensive but I like my ass clean and I don’t want wipes full of crusty shit in my bathroom trash can) which was normal for me but I threw an extra one in there. She asked what I needed baby wipes for and that’s when I broke it to her, one of them was for her. She was a bit confused but I was like, wellllll sometimes uh, you know when you wash a plate that has some dried on crusty stuff? Well if you wiped it with a paper towel, not much would happen right? That’s sorta like your ass babe. Sometimes you need a little water to get clean. She was burnt and went to the car to wait for me. But once we got home she went straight upstairs and used the wipes, and afterwards she apologized for having a shitty ass the whole time. She felt really bad but I was like not mad or anything she just had never had anyone close to her hind quarters before, or I guess no one that said anything. But sometimes you just gotta tell people if their junk stinks.


serpentinepad

Bidets man. Bidets everywhere.


N_Inquisitive

This is wholesome and, despite her ignorance(which could have tanked it, if she was also immature), you *both* handled that really well and I'm glad she had you to help teach her and to be honest with her. I get that she was embarrassed but ultimately she took it well, and that's awesome - and hard when you're THAT embarrassed.


s00perlame

Good luck. Usually people with poor hygiene simply don't care. The fact someone can expect another person to touch their body while theyre dirty has always confused me. Most women are marketed products that tell us we smell and we're dirty. Me and my all girlfriends shower/brush teeth before any sexual encounters. I noticed the guys who don't care about hygiene don't care about much else either. I hope he can fix the smell problems and not become too resentfu towards youl. My ex was furious that his natural bad breath and body odor wasn't attractive even though he used to knit pick every hair on my body. Sorry you're dealing with this.


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Jackel1994

This one made my stomach unhappy. As a man, this is something i would literally die from embarrassment with. I cant fucking imagine letting your bits be that gross. If i cant take care of my own dick and balls, what else in my life is a trainwreck too?


KerbehKlobbah

I agree, how can people deal with being that dirty all day? I would be super embarrassed about being smelly, professionals have standards.


jjellison319

Ugh gross. If it makes the entire room stink, it is not normal at all. I have had plenty of men and if I can smell their dick across the room, that is a NOPE from me. Hopefully your boyfriend takes the advice and steps up his cleaning.


forevermoef

You're dating an unhygienic toddler.


legocitiez

My kid is a toddler. He does not stink, despite refusing baths for the last couple of nights. He gets one more choice night and then it's "do you want a blue towel or a grey towel for your bath." Bc I have *some* standards, despite wanting him to have choices and a say.


VladPatton

Lemme confirm it for ya….it’s not normal. Lol


Cat_Toucher

> normal penis smell It may be normal for him, in that that's how his dick smells the majority of the time, but "normal" or "natural" is not necessarily synonymous with "okay." Or "something you should put up with."


hollowdinosaurs

Is this person your sugar daddy? If not, why the hell are you with them?


kiwichick286

I mean, how can you bring yourself to sleep with him if he smells this bad? Maybe a friend of his could tell him he stinks, but really he should be listening to you...why would you lie about something like that?


sarcasticscottie

And hes still your boyfriend 🤯


Astro_Lord

God why do you people continue to date guys like this. As a lesbian I just don’t understand how the bar is so low


jasmine_tea_

ikr?


Stamen_Pics

As a bisexual women I have no clue either. All the men ive been with either wash themselves like an adult or we don't do anything. And yes I've walked away from sexual encounters because they smelled. Women are always easier to date in my opinion.


serpentinepad

Jesus christ why are you with this person?


FBI-AGENT-013

You wanna know what the normal penis smell is? Nothing. That sounds really gross and personally I wouldn't be able to do it


KerbehKlobbah

Eh, that's not entirely true, penises do have an inherent smell even if you wash consistently, but 1: It doesn't smell like something died, and 2: It's only noticable if you are specifically looking for it.


sexytime_w_bread

Sweet baby Jesus girl get some self respect! I mean, at least you save money not having to buy cheese right? Excuse me while I vomit.


nonstopfailtrain

Totally agree, hygiene is important. That's why I shower every month.


lemonwackyhello

Whether you need it or not eh


Billy1138

My hygiene is poor because I'm too much of a mentally exhausted wreck to try to do anything about it or even motivate myself to hop into a shower every day. But at least I know I have that stank and wouldn't expect someone to go down on me while I do.


kasharox

Hey just wanted to say I understand this. Just now climbing out of a month long depression cave. My first I might add. It sucks and I hope you feel better soon.


hooferboof

I used to be accquainted with some crust punks. The topic came up one time and one said "id rather find a girl that gnasty than take a shower". Diffrent strokes i guess.


BlondeAmbitioND

I have NEVER met a man with bad hygiene who is good in bed. This is for sure grounds for getting dumped from my perspective.


UnusualRegularity

I used to have pretty bad breath. If your teeth are fine, its so easy to lose the smell. Mouthwash and floss. Also could try some water pulling. Some study actually found that using water for pulling is as effective or even more so than using coconut oil. After this routine I can say with confidence that after sleeping my breath is actually fine. Not sure if this rant contributed any.


kiwichick286

What is water pulling?


PeanutsLament

How I invision this: Husband: *thrusts smelly gentials into wife's face* why wouldn't you want this gift? It's PERFECT. Wife: It smells, but not as bad as your breath.


not-my-proudest

Oh man there’s so much truth to this it hurts


strawberry_nivea

My ex had bad breath, it was so bad I covered my face with a blanket during the night if he was facing me. He just didn't brush his teeth even when I asked. I was happy when he would drink whiskey because it made him smell good. Also he was a bad kisser so double whammy for making out. I thought I hated kissing until we broke up and I started dating again.


Stg_885rk

Why did you date this person if he had poor hygiene and was bad at kissing?


strawberry_nivea

We actually got married young and stayed married for ten years, didn't know better. It might be the same with OP.


desertdungarees

Help me out, here. Why does it smell so awful? Has it always smelled this bad? How was it before marriage? How long has the smell been bad? Share some details so we can ACTUALLY wrap our brains around what the fuck is happening, if that's cool with you.


PeanutsLament

Hopefully it at least gave you a good chuckle!


RuMoirin

Don't you get UTis from his dirty dick? Girl why is he your husband again?


raughtweiller622

My ex gf and I used to be addicted to heroin, and we were both prostituting. She would literally go a week without a shower, even after fucking multiple men on “dates”, and then be confused when I wouldn’t want to eat her out lmao. Finally, I told her why, and she called me an asshole, threw a gallon of iced tea at me, and put my PlayStation in the shower.


Chingparr

She didn't want to take a shower, but figured your Playstation needed one. She sounds like an odd one.


TryingDrying

Maybe she thought it would help make showering fun?


speedmankelly

Damn if her clients didn’t care about her hygiene she wasn’t charging enough


raughtweiller622

Yeah, we were heroin addicts. So we basically took any “dates” we could get. I got more money than she did, actually, because I was predominantly catering to upper middle class, middle aged gay men on Grindr, and she was catering to desperate, impotent men on backpage.


noslab

That’s enough internet for today.. WHAT. THE. FUCK.


Pipboy4111

Jesus. That's really rough. One of my friends was a prostitute for a while but hygiene was still always a top priority for her. And her money wasnt going towards anything better than heroin at the time


Sir-xer21

is uhhh, she ok?


Serathik

How did you end up marrying someone before having these conversations???


not-my-proudest

He stopped showering as often when he started working from home.


Serathik

Ah OK so it's like a new development in the relationship. That's a tough call but you're right to speak out.


Glennjamin72

Honestly… bad hygiene is SUCH a deal breaker for me… there’s no way in hell I would have made it down the aisle with someone like that.


dumbass-dragonborn

Damnnnn. Even after I’ve spent an hour scrubbing my body, shaving *everywhere*, and then scrubbing again, I still worry I smell off… I cannot imagine actually smelling horrid and still expecting sex, and then getting PISSED and having a full on tantrum after I’ve been told I smell. I would ask him if he would eat food that’s been in a bra all day during hot, humid, summer weather. No? How about a carrot that’s been in someone’s TAINT all day?! I’m so sorry he’s like this. I hope he gets some legitimate help and uses the shower.


Keepmovinbee

I'm a very blunt person and both my spouse and I suffer from depression. I will always tell him if he smells. Good for you.


not-my-proudest

We both have depression and we have told each other we need to improve our hygiene but god forbid I say something when he wants sex


wiltedletus

It’s not a man’s world any longer. If he wants sex, cleaning up is not too must to ask!


kiwichick286

Well its quid pro quo - if he wants the sex, then he needs to wash. No wash, no sexy time.


[deleted]

A more adult statement might help. Try telling him, “your breath smells like you were sucking your own stank dick”.


Centrist808

JFC- tell him to go suck a smelly dick and see what that's like. What a child!!!


Aadrei

This is the correct answer


valley_G

My husband is well prepared to hear me bitch if he refuses to bathe. Idc what you've got going on, there's nothing in this world that makes it ok to smell like dick cheese. Nothing.


ALikeSupreme

How do these dudes even have wives? Like, if he's well prepared then this was an issue and the only thing keeping him in line is having to deal with fallout from you? That's pathetic on multiple levels.


yeehaw1005

My girlfriend told me my breath smelled and I bought a waterpik flosser and mouthwash. I don’t understand how people hear their woman has a turn off that is easily remedied and they just get upset instead of fixing the simple issue


lynny_lynn

My husband has always washed his junk at least twice a day so he can maintain that fresh feeling. And it's nice that I don't have the overwhelming aroma of balls in my face when I go down on him. I personally won't let him go anywhere near me if I am not fresh. Together 20 years.


BlueFireFlySunset

Same thing. Together 10 years. Hygiene matters, it seems like a self respect thing as well as a you want to respect your partner achievement. Cheers.


itsokay3400

I literally offered my bf a bj last night and he said "I've been at your house for 2 days, I honestly would like to shower first" and I love him


TheAlGler

I am honest with my wife, and she is honest with me. If either one of us tries to go down, we will stop each other if shit isn't fresh. I thought this was part of any healthy relationship, and I am sorry this is a chore for you.


spoilerkaiyadies

Good on you because I dated someone that started to stink down there when he started playing sports again, and it gave me such a bad uti and yeast infection combo that landed me in the hospital and we were told it’s because he gave it to me after he confessed he didn’t know he had to wash down there. He was in his thirties fml. So if he smells consistently down there chances are he’s got an ongoing fungal infection that can make the both of you super sick. I broke up with him within a year after that and moved tf out. Sounds like ur boy might also have a bunch of cavities uaaghh


ericisatwork

your husband sounds immature as hell. if my wife said “hey this is turning me off because your balls smell!” i’d likely laugh, apologize, and then go take a shower. the last thing i’d do is storm off and sleep on he couch. your husband needs to grow up.


Doherr

Good for you! The only thing that makes me wonder.. Since you're married, how long did you wait to tell him? Why did you wait so long? My partner and I would immediately tell each other when we stink and laugh about it. Hell that's doing each other a favor, especially if we're going out, I would be pissed if she doesn't tell me I stink and let everyone else notice. Also, I wouldn't want her to go down on me if my balls smell lol


not-my-proudest

This isn’t the first time I’ve told him he smells and needs a shower, just the first time I told him while he wanted sex.


Dizzy_Eye5257

And also...nasty dick can be a reproductive health issue for you too, infections, UTI, to name a few. So basically, not only is he putting his health at risk, he’s putting yours as well, which can be way more significant


straightupgong

dude this was the exact reason i didn’t enjoy sucking my ex’s dick. it just didn’t smell good and sometimes didn’t even taste good. so when i met my bf i was like “i don’t like sucking dick” until i sucked his dick. hell now i’ll go down on him every chance i get, he loves it. there are ups to keeping your dicks clean, fellas


HeavyMetal266

I keep it clean. I hope someone someday will visit that area


the_ghost_of_a_flea

Is your husband Bam Margera by chance?


Bearsbunbun

I honestly hate when guys throw fits when the female says something men don't do basic hygiene.


psychitsmike1

Pro tip for everyone everywhere: Wash yourself every day idiot.


totallytittastic

Been there. Still dealing with it. It can be hard. My bf has had an understandably defensive attitude when I’ve told him that he smells. It’s been a slow process, he tries but isn’t consistent. I’ve literally told him I don’t want to drive in a car with him cuz his breath smells up the car…. Soooo. You gotta be persistent, if you wanna make it work. Good luck!


not-my-proudest

He wasn’t like this when we were dating. He wasn’t brushing his teeth because of an enamel issue and sensitive teeth, but he flossed and used mouthwash religiously. Mental health plays a big role in his lack of hygiene and I’ve been trying to get him to take better care of his hygiene. I used to tell him if I can smell his breath his coworkers can too and that was enough to keep him on top of it. Since he works from home now he’s given up.


Dizzy_Eye5257

Also...bad dental hygiene can lead to really bad, painful and expensive dental issues. Ask him how he would like a root canal before he hits 40? Also, dental issues can lead to really bad health issues elsewhere


amandoas_

why are you even dating someone like that????


blessednenus3r

This thread is sad as fuck. I’d never even look twice at a guy I can SMELL before I see him. Women are taught to hate our bodies and their functions and constantly maintain with overpriced products but men get a pass to not wash their ass and junk because... why exactly? Fucking stop lowering yourselves to cater to some nasty, crusty, defensive neck beard. How could you even fathom touching someone so vile?


fattydaddy__

Finally someone said it!


adimac80

I’m a big dude and if I don’t wash my junk everyday, the smell is unpleasant. I’ve lost 75 pounds this year. So it’s getting easier to wash my boys and all the undersides. I do everything in my power to not smell. I powder my balls after my shower every morning. It’s the least I can do for my wife to not have to deal with a smelly dick.


Slightly_underated

Personal hygiene should always be a top priority regardless. That's just basic self care. I am glad you told him, hopefully once he has calmed down he will start to be more caring of his own body.


Flako118st

Jesus Christ, I always shower before sex, I like to make the person going down on me to enjoy my shaft, while smelling good. I even got compliments for it. Having sex while smelling. Ugh!


NoTrickWick

I turn my wife’s bjs down regularly because I do a physical job and I feel gross before a shower.


TheWorstBestDecision

A tip for my fellow gentlemen. After your done washing your dick and balls make sure to dry that shit good. Use a hairdryer for best effect. It will completely eliminate that musk that happens from letting something wet dry. Your sexual partner will thank you. Seriously though guys wash and dry your dick and ass lol.


Illustrious_Finger

So that dude would rather argue with you about his hygiene instead of washing his sack and giving his teeth a brush? Maybe I’m not as bad as I think.


Blankrewt

Why the fuck do people deal with this shit in the first place. Not victim blaming but jesus have some self respect.


Retired2XAgent

My wife told my my armpits stunk yesterday and I was super thankful! Who wants to go around stinking and not know it? And what kind of ass gets mad when they’re notified? This is literally someone who thinks their shit don’t stink lol