I am a white female who grew up way below the poverty line. I hate when it is assumed my parents paid for my college because I'm white. I paid for my own college by working 3 jobs and pereverance. What you were born into doesn't define you.

I am a white female who grew up way below the poverty line. I hate when it is assumed my parents paid for my college because I'm white. I paid for my own college by working 3 jobs and pereverance. What you were born into doesn't define you.


Hey OP. This post was removed because A) there isn’t enough info in the post, and B) this post seems a little attention seeky. As a white female who did everything on her own as well, I’m not sure why you want an award for being an adult, and especially why you feel the need to drag race into it. Try reposting with an actual story and without racebaiting.


I’m the first in my family to go to college, because of that and my family not having a lot of money I qualified for a special program at my school. It was designed to help me figure stuff out like picking out classes and financial aid. It really was just an extra support net that was helpful for me. The program was under the “Office of Minority Affairs.” I am white.


Maybe they count being poor also as a minority


Being a first generation student is also a minority.


Being poor very much is a minority in college! About half of students at selective colleges are from the top 20% income bracket, while only around 10% are from the bottom 20%. I'm not sure that's what the building is referring to, though.


Imagine thinking that the poor were a minority instead of the rich. "If there is hope, it lies in the Proles..."


Props for the Orwell reference.


Educated i see


Sociologically speaking, it is definitely accurate to treat the poor as an oppressed minority. However I think the terms could be changed as they are misleading and lead a lot of poor whites to oppose things that are actually in their own best interest. Personal opinion time: maybe we could replace “minority” with “oppressed” or “vulnerable populations?” Because the mentally ill and the disabled also fall under this umbrella. Edit: LGBT groups fall into this category as well.


I think first in your family is way more important than being poor. Also being a female and a first, I’m happy she got in!!!!!


Thank you! It was a huge deal to my family. I remember when I got my acceptance letter my Mom just wanted to hold it. I asked her why and she said “because I’ve never seen or touched an acceptance letter before.” I’ll never forget that. I ended up going to law school as well. I forget sometimes that it’s a very big deal to them.


I actually had that as well. I’m Appalachian so they helped me out. I’m also the first person to go to college in my family! So yay us!


I was considered Appalachian at the college I was going to go to... ended up going to a different college. Looking back, though, I could have used the extra support. I just didn't know it at the time.


That’s awesome! 😊


I'm the first to graduate high school. My counselor was convinced that I should join a building union, since my dad worked in the building trades. I was in the top 5% of graduates in my high school, but all she could see was "white trash"


Couldn’t educate the white trash outta me, dawg. If you were born into poverty, the same people that turned up their noses at you when you were a kid will continue to do so after you become even more successful than them. Fuck em lol.




If you're a woman, that may play a role too. Women are also part of the Affirmative Action in the US.


Amen. If I followed the path I was born into, I would be a chain-smoking, drug-addicted, narcissistic, high school dropout with a serious case of learned helplessness. I am so glad that I had the will power to resist my environment, and go off to make something of myself (no matter how meager). But on the other hand, just because people like you and me were able to do it, doesn't mean that others do not need help. I wouldn't wish my experiences on anyone.


White female here. Also paid my way through school. Left the house at 16. When I was in university a professors teaching assistant got mad because I was using a laptop to take notes while she was speaking. She said, “just because your parents buy your University and buy you laptops doesn’t mean you shouldn’t show respect and listen.” Nearly half the class walked right out (I actually stayed and kept typing away) and I spoke to the professor later about the issue. It was so fucking rude. Edit: spelling


Did the professor respond with more rudeness?


Yup. He apologised and she was never allowed to lecture again in his class. She sucked but it said more about her than us.


I fucking hate assholes like that. Like get with the times. People don’t carry around notebooks anymore OK they take voicenotes or type it out. Fucking deal with it. It’s way easier to organize that way anyway. I can look up a key word and pull up everything in my notes that deal with that subject. And if I throw something away it’s actually not thrown away for a few weeks. It sits in a little bin and I can still get it back. How is this not a superior system?


WTF. Jumping to conclusions much? She’s a total bitch sorry she did that in front of all your classmates. I hate it when professors or whatever ban laptop use. I NEED it to write notes because the 3+ hr lectures leave my hands cramping for days damn


Jeez I would have called her out on her racist BS right there.


It’s literally just rich versus poor and it saddens me that some people can’t look past the barrier of fucking melanin or political affiliations and discover how similar our struggles are.


Amen to this


I hate it when non Asians assume Asians are all rich and smart. Many Asians aren't rich or smart. AT ALL. In New York, for example, the poorest people are Asians. But these statistics are never mentioned or brought up. People just assume all Asians are rich and have tutors and all these great resources when most Asian kids with good grades in good schools actually come from low income families.


I’m white and an immigrant. It’s all cultural. Would come home from school, do my hw properly knowing full well my mom would check over my homework when she came home from work and the explain what I did wrong and make me rewrite it correctly. I believe Asian (and other immigrant) parents do the same and this helps kids excel in school. Having parental support and involvement is important. Of course this didn’t stop the labeling in school that I was white therefore must be from a rich family that wears their shoes inside the house...


> Of course this didn’t stop the labeling in school that I was white therefore must be from a rich family that wears their shoes inside the house... do some white people actually do this? Even the legit millionaires ive met dont do that. what the fuck


Beats me. Its pretty prominent on TV


Many things are common on TV that don't happen in real life. Like all phone calls, and just showing up to someone's house and them actually being there.


I grew up in a very white area, about 2/3 of my friends left shoes on. Drove me crazy.


I'm white/middle class and I take my shoes off, as does my son when he visits, but my husband doesn't.


My mom always yelled at me if i didnt take my shoes off. Im white


We don't. I don't know anyone who does.


As someone who went to a specialized high-school in NYC, the way this idea was publicly accepted got me so mad. “Oh a school is 75% Asian? The entrance exam must be racist, and / or people must be getting an unfair advantage due to socioeconomic status.” That is absolute bs. All of my classmates worked their asses off to be there, and a large portion were low income / first generation Americans, whose families were just scraping by. They succeeded on their hard work and merit, despite these challenges.


Yea - what gets me is when someone like Mayor DeBlasio’s son says the test is racist and admissions should include “soft” considerations. The effect of this would be a privileged Mayor’s son who didn’t score high enough would get the leg up because he is a minority and has a well-rounded resume with internships and extra-circulars hooked up by dad’s connections and money over first generation poor immigrants who study hard to score higher on the exam but whose family don’t have the luxury or means to get their kids into sports, internships, etc. Heck - my parents were immigrants who knew nothing of these “soft” considerations - how the hell would I even have known or gone about getting internships and extra-circulars as a middle school kid without parental guidance to pad a high school admissions resume. That actually disadvantages poor families with less educated/aware/affluent parents when you make “soft” considerations a criteria for 11-13yr olds. Getting into those specialized high schools is literally the only way these first generation kids can make something of themselves - unlike the Mayor’s son. Race does not equate to social economic status.


Amen. People get almost all of their privilege from how wealthy their parents are. Ethnicity is not-even-close secondary.


College acceptance IS racist. Asian students with much higher qualifications gets passed on for literally any other ethnicity with lower qualifications. I’ve seen this happen and many people question why “so-and-so” with a 4.5 GPA, 1950 SAT score, and years of volunteering didn’t get into (insert not-even-that-prestigious college here) while “so-and-so” with a 3.5 GPA, 1400 SAT score, and participation in one club in high school got in.


and they're openly racist about it too. I guess it's socially acceptable to be racist against Asians 🤷🏻‍♂️


There's a term for that called "model minority" and it's just racist as assuming negative stereotypes


asians arent acknowledged to be poor because it hurts the naratives. i fucking hate it.


Model minority myth, Asians are the best off minority, everyone should aim to be like them (that isn’t white). It’s horrible.


I see your model minority myth and raise you The model minority myth...myth


When people say Asian, most people ignore countries not named China, Japan, Korea, or India. Those Asians in the US tend to be significantly less wealthy than their Chinese/Indian counterparts but face the same uphill battle in terms of admission to those asians who are more well off.


Damn I never thought of this.


Identity politics is the modern societal cancer.


Agree. I don't know how we went backwards. I feel like at some point we all understood we were individuals with individual experiences and now we are going backwards into groups/mobs and generalizing groups of people


It’s cause everyone started being loud about the differences and problems. Not saying problems shouldn’t be talked about but it made everyone a victim. The extremists had to separate the victims into categories by how bad their oppression or lack thereof is. The less oppression you have the less say you have. It’s societal revenge. Revenge is going backwards because you’re doing what was done to you in the past, basically repeating history.


It's assuming we can KNOW a disadvantage from something that's simply a PROXY for a disadvantage. To say you know anything about my struggles because you know my gender and race, is refuted as soon as you know my ACTUAL struggles... which typically don't fall into the 2 or 3 little boxes, that the 'woke' brigade seem to care about.


I couldn't agree more, White identity politics is incredibly devastating to the nation and their communities: > 71% of the GDP [was produced in Biden voting](https://www.brookings.edu/blog/the-avenue/2020/11/09/biden-voting-counties-equal-70-of-americas-economy-what-does-this-mean-for-the-nations-political-economic-divide/) counties in 2019, up from 64% of the GDP being produced in HRC voting counties in 2016 and 54% in Gore voting counties in 2000. > States enacting more Liberal Policy has been linked [with people living longer](https://www.mercurynews.com/2020/08/04/liberal-policies-like-californias-keep-blue-state-residents-living-longer-study-finds/) and in dense cities with highly educated populations [people are living longer healthier lives](https://news.stanford.edu/2016/04/11/geography-income-play-roles-in-life-expectancy-new-stanford-research-shows/), even poor people. > Deaths of despair from alcoholism, opioid use, suicide, and obesity [are unevenly concentrated in rural areas](https://www.americancommunities.org/chapter/american-communities-experience-deaths-of-despair-at-uneven-rates/) leading to lower life expectancy among uneducated White men and these numbers only got worse under Trump. > The 15 states with [the highest rate of Bachelors degree attainment](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_U.S._states_and_territories_by_educational_attainment) voted for Biden. > 13/15 states with the lowest rates of Bachelors attainment voted for Trump. > 13/15 states [with the highest rates of poverty](https://en.wikipedia.org /wiki/List_of_U.S._states_and_territories_by_poverty_rate) voted for Trump in 2020. > 11/15 states with the lowest rates of poverty voted for Biden. > 13/15 states [with the lowest rates of life expectancy](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_U.S._states_and_territories_by_life_expectancy) voted for Trump. > 13/15 states with the highest rates of life expectancy (including the top 9) voted for Biden. I am fortunate to live in NYC (one of the highest life expectancies for poor people and the state has the 3rd highest life expectancy overall), but I can't imagine living in the rural uneducated White states where their ignorance and bigotry is destroying their communities. In Missouri, the voters just voted for the Affordable Care Act via referendum, and the politicians are refusing to implement it. Yet they will re vote for these politicians because they support their White identity politics. Disgusting.


You failed to consider the fact that people can criticize Identity Politics from a Left Wing perspective


Well, poor kids are just as smart as white kids, according to Biden. But he's not a racist, it's (D)ifferent when he says it, right?


nobody said it was different, unlike trump supporters just because we voted for and support biden doesn't mean we're going to dickride him. yes hes a bad person, yes hes said and done fucked up shit, but hes still a better alternative than another 4 years under trump


Yeah, that's dick riding him. Please post a racist quote from Trump, please. I have many from Joe if you need to borrow one.


You're most likely a troll but [Trump referring to Sen. Warren as 'Pocahontas'](https://youtu.be/5BycpdZ2I7s) is racist.


How about calling white supremacists very fine people? Why do you think it’s acceptable to ride Trump’s dick and act like he’s never acted like a piece of shit?


He didn't say that.


["You had very fine people, on both sides."](https://youtu.be/JmaZR8E12bs)


I never said he did, I said he was acting like it. The vast majority of his supporters think Trump is the second coming of Christ with no flaws whatsoever


Lol, you know what my favorite part is? When you tell them the exact thing he said and they always respond with "What he *meant* was..." because I guess what he says and what he means are two different things, amirite? [My point proven](https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueOffMyChest/comments/n3m632/i_am_a_white_female_who_grew_up_way_below_the/gwsg2ni/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3)


I mean if you were a black person would you prefer the candidate that supports criminal justice reform, urban renewal programs, and investigates civil rights abuses, but occasionally makes an errant statement to politicians that make directly racist remarks, while also attempting to undermine urban communities and throws full support behind the police state?


If you don't think biden has made directly racist statements, then you ain't black.


Biden and Harris have a reputation of throwing/keeping black people in jail for minor offenses lol


If you don't think biden has made directly racist statements, then you ain't black.


Is that policy?


Nice goal post shift. You claimed biden only made errant statements, contrasting with others who are "directly racist" in their remarks Now you say his racist remarks are chill because he hasn't enacted any laws explicitly based on his numerous openly racist statements


So you are saying Black people should ignore Biden's current policy and instead just focus on the words he said? You think Black people are snowflakes?


What? Why would I make broad statements about what every individual in any racial category should think or do? Any black individual can think for themself and develop their own opinion. My opinion is that Biden's rhetoric and policies convey that he doesn't give a damn about any group in particular, he just panders to whatever he thinks is popular.


> What? Why would I make broad statements about what every individual in any racial category should think or do? Any black individual can think for themself and develop their own opinion. I doubt you really listen to any Black voices at all when forming your opinions. > My opinion is that Biden's rhetoric and policies convey that he doesn't give a damn about any group in particular, he just panders to whatever he thinks is popular. Biden supports and implements popular policies that end up helping people? Oh God. What a horrible politician.


Eres un pendejo


Now I’m not saying I agree with Trump, because I don’t. And I don’t like Biden either. But this whole “the richer/ healthier/ smarter states vote for Biden” is dumb and assumes where it shouldn’t. Correlation doesn’t mean cause. It is more likely that they have seen how the other states have developed economies and urban areas beyond them, and are looking to close the gap, and what better a way than to vote the man who was saying the media (who sometimes push the whole rural area bad thing) is fake, who is also the man who wants to close borders to more people, who take the lower paying jobs that they would tend to be taken by rural Americans. Also, university education doesn’t mean you’re smarter, it means you have more money to get a degree to get a good job. Furthermore, universities are a breeding ground for liberal professors to push their agenda onto trusting millennials and gen-z zoomers (don’t “ok boomer” me I’m 15), who have to listen to what their professors say. It’s no wander that people with degrees are more left wing, it’s been drilled into them.


Oh, the irony of this post, kudos if that was on purpose


The fact that you use Wikipedia and some broken links tell me that you are not well versed in research. You also seem to very biased in said research using the trump voter to make your claims. Now I live in the good ol state of California and the governor is gonna be recalled, so you tell me how well said liberal policies are working here in this shithole. Lets not forget that affirmative action law that was almost passed; it is the most racist thing I ever seen from a state flouting itself to be "progressive". The very fact that this state requires its companies to hire certain people just for diversity sake here is stupid. You don't hire someone because of their skin, you hire them for their qualifications, how hard is that to understand? Thats just one of many stupid laws that were enacted since the start of 2021 in my state


> The fact that you use Wikipedia and some broken links tell me that you are not well versed in research. None of my links are broken. > The fact that you use Wikipedia and some broken links tell me that you are not well versed in research. The fact you dont know wikipedia is directly linking government statistics in easy to read tables show me you dont really understand data or have a valid argument. > Now I live in the good ol state of California and the governor is gonna be recalled, so you tell me how well said liberal policies are working here in this shithole. Newsom is barely paying attention to the recall, he has over 50% approval. California had a 15 billion dollar surplus last year and has the second highest life expectancy of any state. > Lets not forget that affirmative action law that was almost passed; it is the most racist thing I ever seen from a state flouting itself to be "progressive". The very fact that this state requires its companies to hire certain people just for diversity sake here is stupid. You don't hire someone because of their skin, you hire them for their qualifications, how hard is that to understand? Thats just one of many stupid laws that were enacted since the start of 2021 in my state Yup, I'd rather be living in a suicidal obese drug overdosing alcoholic shithole. Those are the real policies that help Americans.


> Yup, I'd rather be living in a suicidal obese drug overdosing alcoholic shithole. Those are the real policies that help Americans. Yeah ikr California and downtown Detroit suck :(


Weird California has the 2nd highest life expectancy of any state and ran a 15 billion dollar surplus and prior to the Pandemic Detroit was experiencing [some of the highest economic growth](https://www.detroitnews.com/story/opinion/2020/02/25/opinion-detroits-economy-grow-over-next-5-years/4834089002/) in the country. Your stereotypes are way out of date my Trumper.


Oh how convenient to assume someone is a Trumper when they challenge you on your views. Abdicates all responsibility to grapple with the idea that you might be wrong about something.


You are the one who tried to bring down California with no evidence that the state is having serious problems (as compared to other states). I mean sure there is poverty and homelessness in California, but it is a big state of 39 million people. You also baselessly attacked Detroit without evidence to try and bring down Democratic policy. That means you are just as stupid as a Trump supporter.


I don't know what you are arguing, that poor white people are underprivileged?


> I am fortunate to live in NYC Nobody would have noticed. Have you more stats to underline your superiority?


My daughters guidance counselor in high school was a black man that I greatly respected. My daughter is half Japanese. When she applied for colleges, the counselor said to make sure that she puts down that she is Asian and not white on the applications for scholarships and colleges. When I asked why he said as a white person don’t expect to get any support. I did not believe this until my daughter got Accepted to college with a scholarship. They went through her Facebook profile and found out that her father was white. They immediately Dropped the scholarship. Edit so I don’t get asked again. They stated we intentionally left out information and used false information to apply for the scholarship. I sought a lawyer but living overseas found just to retain a lawyer was gonna cost me nearly $25G. Not worth it. Edit 2: This particular one required her to be of “Asian decent”. It did not specify percentage. This really upset my daughter. Instead she chose another school and FAFSA is helping a lot. The counselor did state being female is an advantage. Edit 3: Without too giving much info, the Counselor works for DoDDS. They Do a better job fighting racism than public schools. That is probably why he was so honest.


Completely agree. I am Pacific Islander technically but I grew up in America and look completely white with no detectable ethnic features, and I know barely anything about my Pacific Islander ancestors or culture and every guidance counselor told me the same thing. It’s insane that that has to happen but it does all the time. If you’re over a certain percentage ethnic then they will tell student to make sure they emphasize that.


Wow. What a shitty thing to do


How is this even legal today?


I asked the same thing.


Did they tell you they dropped her scholarship because she was white?


Yes. They stated we intentionally left out information and used false information to apply for the scholarship. I sought a lawyer but living overseas found just to retain a lawyer was gonna cost me nearly $25G. Not worth it.


I'm just a bunch of white people mixed together, nothing special. I have unsupportive parents that had me move out as soon as I turned 18. I was young and inexperienced. I tried getting into tons of colleges. I would get accepted because I had good grades, but the majority of the scholarships specified they were only for certain races. As a white person I couldn't even apply. I applied for tons of scholarships, I got nothing. And for some reason I had to write how much my parents made when I applied for government aid (I was still 17 at this point) they said my dad made too much money for me to get any support. I gave up on college.


If you are male, even less is available to you.




All of us said the same thing.


That’s disgusting. Why is America so fucking racist?


Because there’s money to be made from it...


Pause.. what?? I’m a college counselor and it’s insane to think the school did that after finding out that she was mixed. Gahh that kills me


I'm immensely creeped out by someone looking through her Facebook for scholarship verifications. That's some dystopian shit


Yeah. School counselors are also now advising students to be careful with their social media accounts as colleges are indeed looking through them. I recently found out that in TAP classes for military transitioning into the civilian world that they should be careful as employers are doing this too.


I really.. really.. really.. wish people understood how much people from middle to low income homes are pitted against each other. I wish people could understand even slightly.. how many racial stereotypes are created that just keep us divided. It’s a class war. Not a racial one. Yet.. because our skin color dictates so much of our experience through life. We can’t deny or ignore that role race plays in everything.. Even though in the end. It’s money that dictates all of it..


I worked part time for half of my college education as my parents had all of us in college at once. I got into medical school and everybody assumed I was rich. I think it is assumption of one’s ultimate place in society that drives the percerption as very few students have any degree of their own wealth. They all live with roommates in apartments, have little clothing, only have money for food, have to study a lot, work very hard, and have little free time. After a lifetime of working like this one gains some wealth, usually in middle age or beyond. Anything else communicated by other whites or people of color simply is brute ignorance. Hard work after a hard education is most people’s recipe for success. A few people come from wealth, or have wealthy parents, but most of those children are not as successful as their parents.


Intersectionality/critical race theory ignores class and serves capital's interests by dividing working class people against each other.




Fwiw, none of these things are controversial in any discussion I’ve had with any liberal about this topic. I’ve seen this weird sentiment in this thread and threads in right leaning subs that liberals think that race trumps class when it comes to success in life and that’s just blatantly untrue. I’m slightly left leaning but I went to a college where the average student was far further left than I am, everyone there that I ever talked to about this thought class was a much, much stronger indicator of success than race. The liberal view is that there is too strong of a correlation between your race and the class you end up in. This is compounded by the fact that the class you are born into is likely the class you’ll be in for your entire life, and likely the class your children and grandchildren will end up in (none of this has anything to do with race). The reason why race is an important factor is simply because it is more likely that you’ll be stuck in the lower class as a minority than as a white person, so the goal is to adjust the system so that there isn’t such a strong correlation between race and class. The real issue here is the huge difference between low and high classes, if you could fix that then you wouldn’t have to worry about race at all. But the problem there is that any attempt from the left to fix class issues is disregarded as “socialism”. Because it’s so difficult to climb the class ladder (again, regardless of race) the issue of classism is never going to just magically fix itself. Poor families are likely to stay poor for generations, while rich families are likely to stay rich for generations and will spend that time just accumulating more and more wealth which just widens that gap. I think there are some pretty obvious ways we could help adjust that huge wealth gap, but if they just keep getting shot down as “socialism” then the issue will never be fixed. Again, I’m fairly moderate, slightly left leaning. There are a *lot* of things that liberals do and say that piss me off, but this is one case where they’re right. If we really wanted to end classism (or at the very least, lessen the wealth gap just slightly) we could do it tomorrow, it’s actually not a difficult problem. But if we just want to stick to the status quo then of course people are going to try to find other small ways they can fix the issue. Currently the only way liberals have been successful in addressing the issue is by helping minorities (not just racial minorities) explicitly, even if it hurts members of majority groups who are also poor. But to be clear, every liberal I’ve ever talked to about this issue is 1000% on board for ending classism as a whole, and would very quickly stop worrying about race... they’re just waiting for conservatives to get on board.


Because it doesnt fit the cultural marxism narrative


I can't take anyone who uses the term "cultural marxism" unironically seriously


Yes class is 100% a factor. But we should also talk about why one race has disproportionately amount of its population in poverty. Like that may be an actually issue for those people.




Just a thought, why not just judge people by their character and treat them as individuals rather than by class OR race OR gender or any of these arbitrarily chosen markers that people get at birth and are mostly nonmaleable.


An explanation. In Canada we had residential schools which took Native children from their parents and forced them into schools miles away. In those schools many suffered sexual and physical abuse while separated from their families. If the day after this program ended you just became enlightened and treated everyone as individuals, what group of individuals do you think had a better resume and a chance at college? It is certainly great to try to treat everyone as individuals, but if you ignore why one group of people is at a disadvantage, because of historical government sponsored decisions, you are being willfully ignorant in some cases. You aren't treating them different because of their race, you are acknowledging why they might not have a level playing field. A problem specifically caused by laws and government interventions. And then, unsurprisingly, in a system where people inherit wealth from their parents and health outcomes are linked to income, the children of these disadvantaged people seem to do worse overall becomes a problem. And their children do worse. I am not saying there is a simple solution. There isn't. But it is ignorant to ignore government systems that were legal that caused these problems. This is where the systemic discussion comes into play.


Great so let’s tax the rich and regulate businesses while also addressing systemic racism.


Happens to me too. People think I can just afford expensive shit, for one the vets office where I took my pets. Looked at me crazy where I said I couldn’t pay a bunch of cash for a procedure. Damn bitches rent is expensive and it’s just me. SMH.


Doesn’t this happen to everyone, regardless of what you look like? Places that provide services or whatever just expect you to not question and cough up the money they want. It’s a making money thing by extorting customers.


Any assumption based solely on race is racist, regardless who made the assumption.


I feel you. I am older, white, male, and successful in tech, so people assume I came from privilege. I actually am the youngest of 7, dirt-poor Irish-Americans in the suburbs of Boston, on welfare, raised by my older siblings because my parents were too ill. I paid for my own college, and through dumb-luck fell into "engineering" (before there was anything called computer science) and "programmed" chipsets using ancient languages that eventually formed the basis for real computer programming, so I followed the trend. I hustled for every job, worked long hours, made lots of painful mistakes, and now am able to provide for my kids quite well. But I never fit in with the privileged crowd. HOWEVER, I do recognize that there was A LOT of privilege that was assumed onto me by others that helped me greatly in my life - presuming because I was white that I was not a criminal while driving, presuming because I was male that what I was saying was authoritative, presuming because I was white I would pay back loans, presuming because I was male I was lauded for "a strong-minded leader" rather than "being a bitch" (as a woman), etc etc etc. So, while I do not think I had any overt privilege in life, there were some definite covert privileges bestowed upon me, most of which I did not realize until later in life.


People forget about the plight of the Irish and what white trash is. “White” is a blanket term that describes numerous ethnic groups with different cultures, backgrounds, and histories.


I'm also a white girl that grew up without money. We weren't below the poverty line, but we definitely struggled. I'm the first in my family to graduate high school and college. I'm also paying for it by myself. I feel like people do tend to associate race with financial status, but the reality is that we're all extremely different and constantly changing. I'm proud of you for taking your education into your own hands!


Holy fuck reading the comments here really makes you realise how fucked the world is today god damn


I’m a 41m union guy with military background. Parents were lower middle class. I’ve got 3 sisters and a brother. I went to trade school on my own dollar. Then got myself into a union apprenticeship with the local 428 operating engineers. Got married and did the army thing. Got out and back into the union local 302 this time. My wife has been here for all 21 years being the backbone of the family. Hard work goes along ways. Good for you keep it up. The internet needs more stories like yours.


But we love these college educated racists! They know what’s best for us. Go to school! Learn how to be self righteous the proper way!


Avoid people that choose to be a victim but blame anyone other than themselves for their situation. They are not worth your energy. They will not make the world a better place.


I hate the word "privilage" because it is assumed all white people have it. But nothing makes you feel less privilaged than being poor. It seems true that the white boomers belonged to an exclusive club. Not true for millennials. I'm an older millennial and can't even be hired to start a career. Not after severall career attempts and even with a college degree. All the while I'm being told I'm privileged. That is an outdated word that I hate.


Being rich is by far the biggest privilege around, because it buys you power. It doesn’t, however, erase the minority disadvantage that’s still ingrained in our society. A college educated black person is 20% less likely to own a home than a white person who didn’t graduate high school, and homes owned by black people are instantly valued less than those owned by white people, even in predominantly white neighborhoods- these are holdovers from housing discrimination that still exist today. When rich black families sell their homes through trusts at a higher rate than white families specifically to circumvent this, it says a lot about what money buys you - the power to get around some systemic racism. Doesn’t mean it isn’t there. Studies where identical applications and resumes were sent to the same companies with John and Jose as the first name..... guess which name got 30%+ more callbacks despite identical resumes? Statistically (so by population % and not raw number comparison), Native and black men die at the hands of police 50%+ more than their white counterparts, and just look at the disproportionate incarceration rates. ALL of these things are realities minorities live with as a result of generations worth of being left behind and discriminated against. A poor black kid in a ghetto who’s had generations of male role models incarcerated is going to have to work that much harder to break through the poverty line. All of these things are a direct result of skin color. The “privilege” white folks face isn’t that we don’t struggle, or that we automatically have it better than minorities. It simply means that the struggles we DO face aren’t a result of 100+ years of institutional discrimination towards our skin color. That’s the ONLY thing “white privilege” means, and anyone who tells you otherwise doesn’t actually understand the concept.


100% on point. Although I knew the second I heard it, this is the true meaning behind Black Lives Matter. Unfortunately too many people WANT to misrepresent the phrase.


glad someone said it... you don't have to be privileged ONLY in financial status you can be privileged based off the color of your skin meaning if a cop sees you they aren't gonna shoot you immediately


Speaking as a boomer, there is no exclusive club. What needs to be understood in this conversation is the role of systemic racism. White privilege doesn't necessarily mean that your life is privileged, it just means that your race isn't one of the things making life harder.


Great point that’s often misunderstood. Having one form of privilege doesn’t mean you didn’t work your ass off to get to where you are.


> White privilege doesn't necessarily mean that your life is privileged Ideally, yes. That's not the way its used if you've ever been on the receiving end of the oppression Olympics.


I think a lot of people confused privilege and personal struggle. Being white, for example, means that you're less likely to be murdered by a police officer. Do they still kill white people? Yes. Do they kill as many white people as black people? No. Privilege by no means translates to an easy life. It's just saying that a lot of the personal shit you go through, could be even more challenging as a non-white person. There's a list here of different ways that white privilege can show up: [https://convention.myacpa.org/houston2018/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/UnpackingTheKnapsack.pdf](https://convention.myacpa.org/houston2018/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/UnpackingTheKnapsack.pdf) ​ Edit: I also want to say that class privilege is SUPER real too, and plays in a lot. I feel like a lot of people on this post are people that didn't experience class privilege, which definitely systematically disadvantages you. Wouldn't you want someone with middle/upper class privilege to acknowledge the ways that they may have experience privilege over you? To me, that's all a lot of POC are asking - can we acknowledge that the way our system treats us is different?


Preach. My dad came from the swamps in the everglades and had to work from the day he turned 10 to get through college.


you were born into poverty and had to work about 5 times harder than a rich person to get a degree, so yes id say where you were born does define you.


Jesus christ, the inbreds in these comments being hella racist. Can't wait to see this on r/subredditdrama


OP is a three month old account and has two posts, both about being a white female worse off than minorities. Seems like OP likes has an agenda...


Racist people judge others based on their race. Until so called critical race theory decided the opposite was the case. But for people who know better, that’s just the latest form racism has taken.


Welcome to the new America... haha. “White passing” hispanic male here. Parents helped me when I couldn’t stretch my money anymore with rent and groceries at times but I tried not to ask. I did not have to work much but had some working stretches here and there. I tried to stretch my fed aide and scholarships as much as I could. But i “pass” as white so nah im just another privileged man. Be proud and Congrats on the hard work and be glad you accomplished it!


Same, sister. Shittheadittors are just jealous of your determination and self discipline.


Young white people: abolish racism Also young white people: let's look at everything through the lens of race; that can't be a problem, right? Let's make echo chambers to make only the sounds we agree with back at one another. Reddit, Facebook: our echo chambers are free Poor white folks: hi, I'm poor but I made it Young white people: you were always going to make it because you're white. Unfriend/hide. Phew. They didn't even mention privilege; that's the magic word we say to not get unfriended. The speaker's attributes matter more than the message, broad strokes for the win Cycle: continues ​ Their hearts are in the right place, so let's not forget that. It's still a new thing having young people thinking they're calling all the shots, so problems (that shouldn't be ignored, but are) will follow. I just wish they'd listen to critics so as to strengthen the causes they espouse, so that older folks would see the value in cooperating. Cooperation isn't the feeling you get when people give other people shit like OP gets. She's right.


I grew up poor in a mixed area with black, Asian and Latino kids. My siblings and I went to college. We got Pell grants, student loans and partial scholarships. It was not easy for us due to poverty, lack of family connections and lack of opportunities that rich white kids get. However, this does not negate racism. The poor black kids may have been eligible for other scholarships, but they also had to deal with negative stereotypes and outright racism that I did not deal with. I guess I "made it": I left the US, moved to Germany, got a nice life here. I no longer live in a slum, and I am no longer poor. But that does not justify the US system that denies poor people, especially poor POC, a living wage. Identity politics is often used as a wedge between oppressed people: gay vs. immigrants vs. ethnic minorities vs. poor white people. I'm all for examining privilege, discussing racism and homophobia and having dialogue about it, but I draw the line when it is used to divide, instead of unite.


We're on the same page here, thanks for sharing your story


I completely understand. Your hard work will pay off. I did the same and now am doing well, paid off my loans a few years ago. Hoping to be able to pay for my kids college when they go in a few years.


Same. I get the feeling that a lot of POC assume we’re all “rich”, or that we travel in the same circles as the Brett Kavanaughs of the world.




But it still doesn’t help to pay for college. Why is the solution for „cops are killing black people“, „black people get to have more scholarships than white“ where is the connection?


The idea is to get more black people college educated so that the poverty in those communities can gradually lessen. Although you're correct that doing this will do nothing to make up for the lack of systematic punishment for cops who abuse others.


Fyi - [minorities are less likely to recieve scholarships than white people](https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=134623124)


That's a bit dated, here's some figures from 2019. https://www.jbhe.com/2019/08/u-s-department-of-education-releases-new-data-on-racial-differences-in-financial-aid/


Because of financial inequities caused by years of unequal treatment still hold real life consequences for Black people today. If your great great great great grandparents were forced to work for free all of their lives, and they had nothing for your next in line ancestors to inherit, your next in line ancestors are starting off with a disadvantage. Furthermore, your ancestors are also “blacklisted”, preventing them from accessing resources, credit, or high paying jobs. Take several generations of this and your family still finds itself at a disadvantage today. That’s the inequity that programs like Affirmative Action aim to solve.


Sure. There’s a lot on the shoulders of those people, but I still don’t think that this is a reason to give them more advantages than poor white people, to make up for it


If you’re poor and struggling, and you have a chance at your dreams coming true, but you just need a little help, wouldn’t you take it? We all need help sometimes. There’s poor white people that need and deserve help too. There are also scholarship programs available to them (although it’s never enough tbh). It would be great if people could just get the education they wanted without having to worry about paying for it. But that’s not how things are right now. The reality is that different challenges happen depending on several factors, and being Black is one of them. Being poor is also one of them. If you’re poor and Black, that’s two challenges. It’s hard getting through life being poor, but extra challenging when people assume the worst of you. Ideally, wouldn’t it be great if education weren’t profitable so that everyone could attend without an insane amount of sacrifice?


This is what you don’t seem to be grasping - when systems of racism still exist to this day that disadvantages black and brown people, giving them extra scholarship opportunities isn’t “extra”, it’s helping create equality. Equal doesn’t mean you get less, it means you get equal. A black kid gets more scholarship opportunities, but his white counterparts are 30%+ more likely to have parents who own a home, and even if both families own homes, the white home will be valued at an average of 20% higher than the black home, leading to a greater advantage for the white kid. Shit like scholarships, really, is a band-aid attempt at creating equality, when the deeper issues need to be fixed before true equality can exist. Unfortunately many of these things are so deeply ingrained in ways most people - black and white - don’t even realize exist (like housing inequality, like what I was just talking about), so how do you even begin to fix problems most people don’t know are there?


>This is what you don’t seem to be grasping - when systems of racism still exist to this day that disadvantages black and brown people, giving them extra scholarship opportunities isn’t “extra”, it’s helping create equality. Equal doesn’t mean you get less, it means you get equal. A black kid gets more scholarship opportunities, but his white counterparts are 30%+ more likely to have parents who own a home, and even if both families own homes, the white home will be valued at an average of 20% higher than the black home, leading to a greater advantage for the white kid. What you're talking about is equality on a broad scale. It is absolutely not equality for individuals, it is not fair that poor white kids are not offered the same opportunities as poor black kids simply because there are more non-poor white kids. It is not equality or equity, it is as you said a band-aid, and it's a temporary solution which exacerbates the problem. The averages don't matter to the individuals.


People seem to forget that equality means nothing if a group of people are already at a disadvantage. It’s all about equity. Here’s a good analogy. Imagine a scale. The right side has 2 apples and the left has 5. Obviously the left side of the scale is going to be lower than the right because there is more weight pulling it down. If you say “we will be adding apples to both sides of the scale every day. In the name of equality each side of the scale gets the same number of apples a day”. Yes, the amount of apples being given are the same, but the left side of the scale is still going to be heavier than the right. However, if you say “we will be adding apples to both sides of the scale everyday. In the name of *equity* every day the left side of the scale will be given one more apple than the right *until both sides weigh the same*. After both sides of the scale weigh the same and are even, then we will add the same amount of apples to the scale everyday”. TLDR; Equality doesn’t work if a group starts off at a disadvantage. Yes, there are now more opportunities being created that target minorities, first gen kids, and poor kids, but we must do this to even the playing field before we can talk about equality.


Yeah.. that’s stereotyping/racism for yah. No one race can truly be gone of it.


This should be obvious and its sad that it isn't for most people. And am I the only one who thinks it sounds kinda racist to assume blacks or any other race than white are all poor?


My family isn't well off, but they do just fine, so everyone assumes they paid for my college. Nope. Not a dime. I moved 900 miles away and supported myself with 2 jobs and paid for school out of pocket. I didn't qualify for loans because they went off my parents income too. They literally laughed at me in the financial aid office when I handed them my application. I was under 26, so I could potentially have their healthy insurance and be claimed as a dependent. I was told to get emancipated. At 19. Screw everyone's misconceptions. You know how hard you worked. Their opinions don't matter.


Also white (guy though) and born into poverty, thankfully scholarships helped a lot and I only needed a part time job to pay for my first year of college (I’m a freshman), also thankfully my parents are no longer in poverty (my family is finally moving into middle class as of last year I believe).


Thats called racism


I had to join the army to pay for mine but people still assume my dad pays for my nomad lifestyle. There’s no way I’m just that good with people and that confident I can move around the country as I please.


I would say the year/decade you were born certainly impacts the decision tree of opportunities you were afforded. Very different to be a young adult in the 2000s vs the 1960s.


Same, I hate that shit. I served 4 years for a chance at college.


I keep seeing rich vs poor, what about middle class? Middle class kids usually don't qualify for aide so have to take on enormous debt.


I was poor growing up and am a POC. Have been told many times that I am only successful because I am a POC. Engineering college, computer programming. That college must have been free (not true), the standards are lower for you (not true). Have a job because quotas (not true). Its all so ridiculous in your case and mine.


Mods in here remove everything- opine on every comment . Is there a better subreddit we could go to where MODs don’t exercise useless authority?


You sound pretty bitter about your "bf" getting into college with a acholarship... and racist.


It shocks me to learn when my friends whose rents paid for college don't know what FAFSA is


Same here but I am male. Not only did we not have money but then I had an alcoholic father who drained what little money we did have. I had to struggle and fight to make it through college and it’s just assumed it was given to me because I am a white male and I have privilege.


I relate to this. I’m also a white woman from a poor rural community. I worked my first job at the age of 15 doing manual labor in a field. Never had a bank account until I was 18, which was the same time I was figuring out college. I didn’t understand anything at all about finances and I took out a ton of student loans. I didn’t understand the difference between a grant and a loan, and while I got grants, I still needed loans to cover the difference/pay for books, etc. I have always been a straight-A student and a hard worker but the financial hardships I’ve faced have always been a huge setback. There was never a time during school when I didn’t have to work at least one job, usually more than one. I understand that I have privileges that others don’t, but sometimes my disadvantages seem invisible to others. I feel like white middle class people often assume I am “one of them” whereas I see them as very different from me. We did not have the same life experiences. Sometimes my mannerisms give me away, but I’ve learned how to fake it to blend in with these people. I have a master’s degree and now work in higher education but I still feel like an outsider in a way that’s hard to describe.


> Sometimes my mannerisms give me away, but I’ve learned how to fake it to blend in with these people. This is so underrated! I came up poor and white, and it showed. There were so many things that middle class kids understood, things they said, common experiences. I was swimming upstream just to fit in with my fellow retail workers while I worked my way through college. Don't even get started on knowing how to dress or present myself.


I worked my way through college and so did my father who grew up impoverished. I've never encountered anyone who assumed otherwise. Maybe it's the crowd you hang out with or maybe you're projecting your own insecurities onto others.




fr XD also what's with all the "i am white" in this comment section.


For way too many people born into poverty and disadvantage, their birth circumstances *do* define them.


I hear you, I'm in a similar boat. One thing that helped me was the quote "white privilege does not mean your life wasn't hard, it just means your skin colour wasn't one of the things making it hard". Like, yeah, I am a white girl and I've never had to suffer any form of racism. And still, I lived below the poverty line, my physical and mental health is garbage, and I'm working hard to pay for college.


It’s just a bunch of worthless examples of humans attributing everything to whiteness so they don’t have to put in the effort.


It's almost as if focusing on identity rather than economic class is really stupid


Well there’s no such thing as white privilege, so if anybody tells you that, they really don’t deserve your company or consideration.


BuT wHaT aBoUt YoUr PrIviLeGe! /s


I've never met anyone who thought someone was getting their college paid for because they're white. It's most likely not your race and just the way you present yourself and come off that makes people think you didn't pay for college yourself. Also, if you're upset about that insignificant assumption that is not negative in the slightest then it shows how you have a truly privileged life. Having your parents pay for college is a privilege, I'm also a white female and I wish my father could've paid for my college but he couldn't and nobody ever assumed he did. I know I'll get downvoted to hell for this but it's crazy how much people will convince themselves that they're oppressed to push a victim narrative.


I agree, in the modern world it’s well known that all types of people are below and above the poverty line. Victim complex much?


There is class privilege (money) and 2 parent household privilege. There is no white privilege.


To say there’s no white privilege at all is a real dumb statement as there absolutely is however I do believe it gets credit for a lot of things that are other privileges such as socioeconomic privilege. If rich people decided it was time to enslave folks again, you bet there’d be plenty of poor whites and Latinos in the mix with poor black people.


can you give an example of white priviledge please


I'd say just go look at how people like Kyle Rittenhouse were treated vs people like George Floyd But yeah it's because he's.... an apartment dwelling likely not even middle class person that he gets all those privileges.


[Being less likely to be discriminated against when it comes to hiring due to your name sounding white](https://www.nber.org/papers/w9873)


Similar story and it drives me insane when I hear the “I didn’t get the opportunity”. No... you didn’t make the opportunity.


You are white so you must be privileged. BLM mindset lol


People who use the term "White Privilege" are racist or very stupid - probably both




I may be missing your point but... she never said she didn’t have white privilege. She said she hated when folks assumed her parents paid for shit she worked for. You say it’s harder being a poc, and I believe you. I’ve had it way easier than many, and harder than some. That her journey has difficulties in no way means yours doesn’t. Two things can be different and worthwhile at the same time. From outside, it looks to me like the US could really do with more access to free higher education for anyone who needs it. It looks like the US ( and Australia) could really do with a change in the way many races are dealt with. There is unfairness in place at the moment that needs to be rectified. Change has been happening, things are better now than in the 1800’s. The speed of change needs to increase, and we still have a long way to go, but we can get there as allies. I’m not meaning to attack you, I’m suggesting you seem angry at someone who hasn’t minimised your struggle. She’s just venting about her own. That said, if I’ve misunderstood what you’re saying, or gotten the tone wrong ( which I do irl and more online) I would like to hear how.


No one says every individual white person has privilege. The argument is as a class of people you will more likely be treated better than a minority. This is such a non argument


Actually, many people saying that white=privilage. I once called into NPR one day because there was an author saying exactly that.


I think the problem is that there's a bit of a split in what *exactly* white privilege means to some people. To some, it means that they believe that no white person can struggle in poverty like many black/latino/etc. Do. To others, it just means that they don't face the unique disadvantages of being non-white in a white dominated society. It's kinda like the "defund the police" thing. Some meant it as just taking away funding, while others meant it as *reallocate* funding to mental health services. The problem is, as you can see from this subreddit, quite a few white americans feel offended at (what can be percieved as) being told that just because they're white, they've never struggled in life, ever.


I'm a white female and no one has ever assumed this about me. Edited to add the ignorance of this thread is astounding


Damn, we had no idea miss everybody was among us


It's not just "white = rich", it's mainly about who has a better chance at upward mobility, due to or lack thereof, systemic differences in how people are treated due to their skin tone. Basically, what was difficult for you, would be twice as hard for a similarly placed African American woman. (Note: still not a suggestion ar impossibility) I mean I agree with you to a degree, that what you were born into "shouldn't" define you; but that just isnt the case for millions of Americans.