By - makmark
I like this version of Belos already.
Also Imagine if the real reason Belos killed Caleb is that they disagreed on how steak should be done.
The fact people get so hateful with each other over little petty things sometimes is scary.
Human History in a nutshell.
We will cause a world war over some gold.
Petty arguments are quite a butterfly effect on there own.
I mean. Rome was founded by 2 brothers who killed the other because of Walls.
…what? Really? Rome was discovered because 2 brothers killed each other over some walls? Or was it someone named Walls?
The actual reason was because of them disagreeing on which hill to bulid Rome on.
Remus was said to insult Romulus's city and was killed for it.
Imagining them saying "weird hill to die on but ok" is funnier than it should be.
Y'know I never gave thought to which hill the metaphor originally referred to... but based on the age and region of the saying, probably one of the ones in Vietnam.
I wonder if those two were ever close to begin with. If they weren’t, it would make more sense.
Romulus literally went and organized an effort to rescue Remus from capture.
Imagine being one of the soldiers in that operation, you risk your life to save Romulus' bro, only to hear that he killed him a few years later because Remus dissed Romulus' city.
Remus wanted the walls to be closer to the tiber river for easy access to trade but Romulus wanted it to be on the Palatine hill which is far better for defense and since legend says that a lot early founders of Rome were refugees and outcast (and later they would even claim Trojans) so it would make sense to go on defense 1st
like on the one hand more trade is more power ,,,,but on the other hand despite putting the walls in the Military first position the city got still sacked by the gauls very early in its life (the gauls lived in northern Italy at the time )
that by the way lead to the survivors taking an oath to never let this happen again ,,,breeding a militarist culture which would act pragmatic in war ignoring traditions the moment they stopped working ....something Sparta did not learn ,,,and thus got irrelevant ...
and thus with this adopt and overcome mindset ...the chain reaction that led to the roman empire was born
>disagreeing on which hill to bulid Rome on
**Phil:** I totally support the decision to tear his brother apart for it, it's a completely acceptable reason
**Hooty**: I ate all my siblings when I was in the nest, hoot! Hoot!
Founded like built not like found
since we are talking Rome the Chad Cato the elder vs the virgin Cato the younger [https://www.youtube.com/clip/UgkxjjHpeKO1EkQRot-nEczvIHXWza8sT2SF](https://www.youtube.com/clip/UgkxjjHpeKO1EkQRot-nEczvIHXWza8sT2SF)
Makes human history fun, chaotic and insane at the best of times.
…and they say the subject is boring.
I think the boring part most people refer to is the non war and political parts.
And even those parts are fun if you understand how it works.
Pretty much. They just have to be framed in interesting and relevant ways.
My favorite example is HBO’s John Adams, which mostly focuses on the political side of the Revolutionary War and the early United States government. It is boring in a textbook, but riveting on-screen as issues like slavery, taxation and alliances are debated by the characters.
History needs illistrations and some good context to provide education in an entertaining way.
Wanting a steak well done is *not* a little petty thing.
Is medium tolerable?
yes, Medium Well is on thin ice. Probably too thin to hold your weight.
Welcome to the family, we have tiramisú
Agreed. Back in school I had someone tell me my parents should be "slaughtered" because how they cooked steak (well done) 😬😬 0-100 real fast
How volatile a person can be is an enigma.
I'll kill you and your whole family!
Same this version of Philip is way better
Hank Hill Belos.
Still has some hangups on Evelyn and the Isles. But loves his brother and trys to be supportive.
Except in the case of how to cook a steak.
Past golden gaurd: "huh i think i understand why you like these rare steaks uncle" *is eating undercooked chicken breast*
Belos: *sighs and pulls out knife* and you were almost perfect.
Belos' murders of Grimwalkers weren't over wiping out witches and demons, it was over how to cook steaks.
Another Past Golden Guard: *Laying motionless in bed in his room*
Belos: We had a Gas-Leak that time, the silent killer.
That boy ain't right I tell you what.
Belos: Hello Luz Noceda. My name is Belos and I sell propane and propane tools.
plot twist: it was never belos that killed caleb. it was Gordon Ramsey
ITS FUCKING DRY
I like his beard.
He pulls the beard off well.
watch out, Philip simps incoming!
And if this comic is accurate, Caleb really did deserve it.
Imagine if Caleb preferred Charcoal over Propane.
Then Belos really was in the right for killing him.
That Wittebane ain't right, I tell you what
Hank Hill as Belos would have been an interesting timeline.
Now I want a king of the hill owl house crossover
Bobby Hill beating Belos or the Collector using the "Thats my purse" Technique.
"If you don't stop talking about Wild Magic I'm gonna kick your ass!"
Luz then procedes to use the "Thats my purse technique" to defeat Belos.
Luz: "One thing you'll find about me, Belos, is that I'm not a very patient person."
Dale Gribble defeats The Collector with pocket sand!
>Well Done Steak
Agree. He was a damn heretic.
FOR THE EMEPROR!
I feel like The Watcher from Marvel's What If...? Would be thinking REALLY Belos? Over steak?
Nah it was clearly over mariokart.
Evalyn warned Caleb not to pick rainbow road u.u
Mariokart. The monopoly of video games.
I wouldn’t blame him.
Yeah, and only then finds out about the whole "witch" thing and starts planning genocide
The witch thing is a secondary reason compared to the unholyness of Caleb prefering Well done steaks.
Caleb is a crappy chef who always serves steaks well done…with ketchup.
1 inch Thick Top Sirloin Steak .. Salt and Pepper heavily … grill at 400 .. 4 Minutes total ..flip each minute to get good grill marks … let sit for 2 minutes… Down the hatch.. Gill marks Bahd
Belos. The much more aggresive and darker Hank Hill.
Yup, you simply can't have a good steak without the juicy tender middle. I used to be Well-Done guy myself before I fell to the clutches of ~~Wild Magic~~ Medium-Rare Steaks
(Also kicking myself for deleting my original comment, curse my impulsive, overly-critical, self)
To be honest.
As a non American. I never did eat steak. The only steak I eat were port steaks with alot of marinated sauce.
Also your original Comment was funny as hell.
You could've been the cool uncle. Or even the racist one we begrudgingly invite to Thanksgiving.
But no. You had to be the bird murdering genocidal uncle who we still begrudgingly invite to Thanksgiving.
Imagine if Belos was still racist and hated Evelyn. But loved his brother more. So he did not try to kill them.
Just setting for passive aggresive comments.
So a sitcom? That'd be a fic I'd enjoy reading.
Man I wish i could write or commission this AU.
Totally not adding this to my list of fic ideas…
Happy Cake Day. Angsty one....
Send me a link if you do it
Eda: I can excuse murder but I draw the line at eating Palismen.
Camila: You can excuse murder?
But he's not eating the palisman, he's eating it's *soul*
Luz: Yeah, I agree with you Eda, someone who kills Palismen are true evil.
Camila: Luz! You too?
AND HE IS NOT EVEN A REAL UNCLE
The good ending
But then Hunter wouldn’t be here and be in love with Willow. So very torn.
I mean you are kinda picking between hunter or the attempted murder of the bi.
I see your point, but who knows what it could have changed for the worst? That’s the butterfly effect for you.
I also see your point but I am only focusing on things Philip won’t do in the future
Yeah, but if it turns out like this, Lilith would have never wanted to join the Emperor’s Coven and curse Eda because the coven would’ve never existed. Eda would have never met King and Luz and… I think you can see where I’m going with this.
Assuming Eda and Lilith would come into existence in the first place. Who knows how many witch settlements would have flourished instead of being set on fire. Of how many witches would have lived, if it wasn't for Belos preaching and experimenting with coven systems.
Perhaps different witches would have met others, Eda and Lilith's parents could have met other witches instead, witches from forefathers that died from the first coven marks.
You mean the bloody fly effect.
not my headcanon personally but ok
I was super confused for 3 minutes wondering what you meant by BI x😅🤣
A soul for a soul.
The good beginning
Arguments over the right type of steak have destroyed more relationships than anyone will ever know.
"You're doing it wrong!"
"It's my food, why do you care?"
"But I'm riiiiiiight! Whaarrrgharbl!"
Ahoy ghost_warlock! Nay bad but me wasn't convinced. Give this a sail:
"You be doing it wrong!"
"'tis me grub, why d' ye care?"
"But I be riiiiiiight! Whaarrrgharbl!"
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Almost as many as the whole “pineapples on pizza” debate has.
I like mine medium rare
I like mine legendary
So u just bite the still living cow?
No, they mean that they like it with gold foil
psycho. rareis the way to go
"What if they want their stake well done?"
"We ask them politely to leave"
The actual quote is "We ask them to politely yet firmly to leave.
...Starting to have a little less sympathy for Caleb.
between this and the dad jokes, maybe Philip was right…
DAD JOKES ARE THE BEST
What do you call a cow with no legs?
*ba dum tss*
Just *chucking* those beef puns out, aren't ya?
You know what they say about good meat puns, they're a *rare medium well done*
\*slow clap\* If I had an award to give you.... I promise you that I would give it to you.
Hey now, Puns are always good. You leave them out of this.
This should be real
Same anyone who likes meat well done clearly has something wrong with them
Imagine if Caleb used Charcoal instead of Propane.
I doubt they’d have a lot of propane laying around in ye ol’ days, or laying around the boiling isles
Whale oil or equalvlents for Propane.
From the look of what they're using, I'd say it's just regular old wood.
It was a King of the Hill reference.
I'm fully aware of that, boy I tell you hwhat.
I love how we’re all just balls-deep on the theory about Eda and Evelyn being related. I mean I am too, I just like how it’s universally accepted by now
I mean to be fair they look *a lot* alike
I second that. A palisman that's nearly identical to other clawthorn palismans and has a name that lines up with every clawthorn naming styles.
[I'm sorry Caleb but you have to leave](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amKyA2PrSu4)
The right way to tell someone who likes Well done steak. Politely yet firmly.
so basically, Philip if he wasn’t racist?
Belos is channeling Hank Hill
On Hunter: That boy ain't right I tell you what.
Belos: do i look like i know what a Titan is? I just want a glyph of a god dang hotdog
Never thought I would say this but “I agree with Philip”
Caleb likes well done steak?
Guess Philip is the more reasonable brother after all.
Honestly some people just like jerky. It's a texture thing. And as long as they're paying for it, why should anyone care how they want to eat their food? I mean, some people put butter in coffee for Pete's sake! Overcooking a steak is innocent in comparison
I'm sorry, they do WHAT to their coffee?
Yea, that one shocks me too
I like well done steak so I can put it in a sandwich without soaking the bread
I don't even eat meat and I know you're supposed to toast the inside of the bread to create an insulating layer against the juices, you HEATHEN.
Philip is the barbecue general
Oh, if only....
What could’ve been…also Evelyn right? I think I might know one of your descendants.
Phillip: "Why the sudden marriage?"
Evelyn: "Let’s just say him and I had way too much fun and suffered the consequences for it."
Phillip: "What are you insinuating?"
Caleb: "Well, you’re going to be an uncle."
Phillip: "Oh, double congratulations!"
It's honestly sad how Belos was unable to overcome his hatred for witches in canon. While he internalizes it as his brother being corrupted by the Demon Realm, he knows deep down it was his fault. Yet he continues on with his crusade because if he were to acknowledge that the world changed, it would mean also accepting the guilt over murdering Caleb.
Philip did nothing wrong.
Caleb: “It’s over Philip, I have the high ground!”
Steaks couldn’t have been any lower, I guess
The alternate universe where the brothers moved to the [Colony of Rhode Island](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colony_of_Rhode_Island_and_Providence_Plantations#Sanctuary_for_religious_freedom) instead of Connecticut.
[Why don’t you love who I am? What could’ve been.](https://youtu.be/liPu1_aPH5k)
Okay but if you think about it, all the things that happened in the series wouldn't have happened this way.. the emperor's coven wouldn't have existed, so Eda wouldn't have been cursed, she wouldn't have found the portal, and that way Luz wouldn't have come to the demon realm
Honestly would love to see a spin-off series following the story of the brothers
How dare you make Philip look reasonable-
It was all just one big misunderstanding.
Id really like a possible Phillips Backstory spinnoff or smt
Timeline where both brothers got a girl
Never thought I'd agree with Belos on something. Well-done steaks are awful.
*In spy's voice*
Hm... ill take it.
“Today ain’t your day pancakes”
Belos: "WELL DONE! HOW DARE YOU?"
The good ending.
The minotaur out of frame: Please. I have a family!!
Huh. Never thought I could.. agree with Belos..
Oh! So that's why philip killed him.Hes a monster who prefers juiceless steak
That title make me go
Glad the oversimplified artstyle was just temporary
I agree with Phillip a good steak is a juicy steak
Philip: Firm but with little give, now that’s a Medium Rare Steak
Hunter (C+E’s Son): What if somebody wants theirs Well Done uncle?
Philip: We respect their decisions, despite how heretical it maybe.
This is the only case where I'll agree with Philip. We'll done steak is truly a sin.
The “What If…” Scenario we needed.
If Philip had been a good brother...
Caleb just wanted to grill.
Plot twist, he actually dies from choking on the steak
The best timeline
Eda: "Yeah, I can tell that story is BS, dad."
Dell: "Really? That’s not how I heard it from Emperor Belos."
Gwendolyn: "Dell, I’m pretty sure Eda can tell if it’s a lie or not, right Sweet Flea?"
Lilith: "Yeah, that’s total witch-shit, Pop Pop."
Dell: "Well… I’ll be a scarred man with a high STEAK."
Eda: "Dad jokes? Really dad?"
I really was thinking that Philip was gonna do something bad! This one is so funny! And at the end.
Caleb: "We and Evelyn are getting married."
Philip: "Congrats!" 😂
Y’know what, I’m starting to think main-universe Philip made the right call; there are some choices that can *never* be forgiven...
I'm on Belos side on this one
Day fourty five of saying my reactions to realizing the new mak mark comic is out: ohhhhh
Nope, should’ve done it
Caleb's in the right, I want my meat cooked.
Such hersey must not go unpunished
I need a full au of this.
Unrelated but i had to do a double take on the steak cuz I thought those were hands.
Also this Philip is W.
I lost any respect I had for Caleb. Well done stake? Disgusting. It needs to be nice and juicy, medium rare. 😋 that is a “well done” stake
The Chad Au where he is a Chad in this universe, Hunter does not exist...
*The good ending*
The good ending xD
Phillip: *He snaps sitting on the bed, drenched in sweat.* No Caleb! *Breathing heavily, running a hand over his face. It was* ... It was just a nightmare, my God ... A nightmare ... Just a simple, stupid nightmare ...
Kikimora: *From under the covers next to Phillip.* Go back to sleep dear, in the morning you have to take the children to the Flyer Derby game ...
Phillip: *He snaps sitting on the bed, drenched in sweat and screaming. Immediately checking his side of the bed, finding it empty.* Good heavens ... A nightmare within a nightmare? *He lays down on the bed.* Thank god it's over and I'm finally awake-
The Collector: *Opening the bedroom door slightly.* Dad? I think there is a monster in my closet ...
Phillip: *Terrified scream.*
I prefer my steak cooked, not raw.
Medium rare isn't raw!
I am 110% sure I heard Belos say her name was Evalyn (Ee-vah-lyn) and not Evelyn (Eh-veh-lyn) and I will DIE on this hill.
Dang, that was not what i expected. Still loved it though.
They had us in the second third, not gonna lie