By - ComesandGoes31
That's sad to watch. I think as independent as we believe Janelle is, she still wants to be able to rely on Kody, especially as she gets older. She doesn't seem to want romance or need a ton of attention so much as she wants confirmation of security and companionship.
Christine was lacking a lot in her marriage, but that doesn't mean Janelle was unhappy with her own arrangement... I do think she truly considers Kody her best friend, but things are changing. And that can be scary.
She definitely would like the security and friendship. But now he's not trying to help her at all. He just wants to be babied bc he's hurt by Christine leaving. Janelle isn't the babying type
But he does not provide security or friendship. He’s reckless and self serving, in all ways.
Does she really think Kody will help her as she ages? And be company?
I think he gave her enough support and companionship for a long time. Since the move to Flagstaff, he's basically given up. All she's asking for his minimal involvement to return, and he seems unable or unwilling to do it. At times it seems like he is expecting more than what worked for them before. Like he expects every relationship to be like his and Robyn's. And that isn't what Janelle needs or wants...
He's annoyed that he even has to level her trailer.
Can Kody change who he is, fundamentally? I think that’s your (or at least Janelle’s) answer. (One can become a narcissist, but can anyone undo that? 😕) He has become cordial with Meri, but he still doesn’t go out of his way to see her or be a friend).
He doles out *just enough* to keep her $$ in the relationship while keeping *her* out of it.
I have been told that someone with NPD cannot change. If they get therapy and desire to make changes, they can change, but never fully, it will always be a struggle against their personally disorder.
Yes. Exactly. My mom never changed. In her final year, she had a couple rare moments where she apparently wanted to know why she was the way she was, and if she was “being punished”. But she never took the time to say sorry… and in the end, she could never change. It just wasn’t possible.
You’re spot on. Personality disorders are considered some of the hardest to treat because rather than being a chemical imbalance, they are disorders of who we are, how we think, and are commonly associated with how someone is raised (but not always). There’s no reason to think that with therapy (DBT is in particular good for personality disorders) people can’t develop some insight into their behaviors as well as ways of dealing with their emotions in more healthy ways. But their “baseline” will always be disordered.
This scares me, I was recently diagnosed with BPD and I wanna unlearn my toxic/bad behaviors but I’m scared I won’t ever be able to
There’s some controversy over BPD- if it’s truly a personality disorder or if it’s actually complex PTSD.
The fact that you recognize problematic behaviors and have a desire to change them puts you ahead of the game already. Self-awareness can be difficult!
Thank you you’re certainly right!!
Yeah good luck on your journey! And when you're wondering if you're really making progress, think how much better of you are than Kody Brown lol
Don’t be scared. It’s just a personality - we all have them. What you have, my friend, is the power of an answer with a diagnosis and clearly the desire to live a happy life. That’s half the battle sometimes.
My psychiatrist said wanting to get better is the first step in getting better, it just scares me because my mom (who was my abuser in a lot of situations) also had BPD so it scares me
You can & I wish you all the best.
Go back and read what you read. “I wanna unlearn
My toxic/bad behaviors”
My dear-that is the hardest step. You are understanding you have things that you need help
Changing and you want to change them.
You. Will. Overcome
Right? Would he travel with her and see their kids? No, of course not. Will he help her finically? I think he’s proven his worth (or lack of) in that area. Will he be there for her? 🤔 my bet is no… once Savanna is out Janelle will be gone because she no longer has a child’s relationship with their dad to protect.
Man one can only hope!
I mean, I’m pretty sure her mom became Kodys dad’s ‘favorite’ wife, so maybe she assumed if they could marry later in life and be close (that) she had an even better chance also sharing children and decades with him?
I’m not sure what she or her mom were thinking, neither were raised in this world, they both willingly/willfully chose something that appears to be the antithesis of how they see themselves.
When she had covid that was a sneak peek for her of what he will do as she ages.
That's what I keep thinking about. What's going to happen when these women have a major surgery? Or a serious illness?
Her standards for the marriage are pretty minimal in terms of what most people want/expect.
She doesn't want romance and flowers, she wants support and companionship. You'd think Kody would be OK with this (he was in the past, for a long time, it's not like this is a new standard put forth by Janelle), but now he thinks every relationship should be like his and Robyn's.
It's pretty ridiculous he can't just take Janelle's hand and say "I want to get through this with you". I honestly can't even tell what his end game is. I can't tell if he wants it to work, or if he's just ready to throw in the towel.
I cant tell what he wants either...but I do think robyn and her kids takes up enough of his bandwidth to where he just doesnt have energy for another woman.
I dont know if he is trying to kick her out in that scene bc to me it looks like he just really wants to eat his food and is distracted by it.
Kody is now going after Janelle and he doesn’t want to be married to her, he is doing the same thing he did to Meri and then Christine. Janelle needs to realize not only is it over but your best friend Kody is trying steal the family money!
Is end game is just Sobyn Robyn.
And he is shoving her out the door.
That last comment—“It’s not safe for me to say, ‘hey sweetheart, I’m broken-hearted from this divorce and I need you to help me heal, please’”. WHY is that not safe to say? It’s probably the ONLY thing he could say that would make Janelle feel sympathy for him! What is this “emotionally safe” bullshit and why does he keep trotting it out as an excuse for not speaking openly with ANYONE other than Robyn????
He picked up the concept of emotional safety in therapy and now he uses it as an excuse like Covid to avoid interaction with his wives. Not that it isn't a real thing but, he only brings it up when it is convenient for him.
Yeasss! I hate the way they all use these therapy buzz words when they don’t really know how they’re meant to be used!
and haven’t done the work to integrate the concepts into behavior
Yep! So sick of hearing him say it
Classic narc move
Is my ex husband….. kody?
He's learned to weaponize therapy jargon. It makes himself the victim, and also desensitizes others to the concept so when the OG wives *rightfully* claim he's "not safe", the phrase is meaningless.
Yeah my sister told me “words matter” after she learned that phrase when I asked her to wear a mask to meet my newborn. I was like uhh I don’t think you’re using that phrase right…
lol wut? Like what does she even mean using it in that context? It doesn't make sense!
No idea! It came in a text rant about how I need to decide whether I want her in my life or not. I think she thinks “words matter” means “don’t say any words to me that I don’t like or I’ll stop talking to you”…and clearly she didn’t like me asking her to wear a mask. Spoiler alert, we haven’t spoken in a year.
Woof. I'm sorry things went down that way. But you did the right thing, you can't be too careful with a newborn!
I feel like this comment is going to make me feel dumb, but don't a lot of personality disorders actually get WORSE with therapy because those individuals learn more about how to manipulate others and weaponize it? is NPD included in that? regardless I feel like Kody falls into that category, but he's not as smart as the average successful narcissist, so it's blatantly obvious and not very well deployed.
Yes, with bad therapy! And no offense, but as a psychiatrist, I could tell that Nancy was in over her head. (Of course, I wasn’t in the sessions, but from her background via Google, experience, and what was shown on TV).
I honestly thought she was a "stunt therapist."
I so agree! They needed a therapist who was a hardass, someone who would actually say, “You are not being clear. Say what you mean, don’t talk around everything”. They all used therapy-speak to avoid saying the truth. And nothing got solved.
I have wondered about this recently with a family member… just earned her masters in counseling and it really seems like she weaponizes her knowledge against people. :(
Yes, was going to say the same thing when I read the comment above
This is why therapy is usually a bad idea for narcissists
Narcissists are very skilled at weaponizing therapy jargon.
I walk a tight rope of knowing narcissists need therapy and feeling like they only use therapy as a tool to learn more insidious manipulation tactics, as we see time and time again with Kody.
Add a hearty dose of AA (12 Steps)to therapy and the narcissist becomes a human weapon of mass destruction.
I am a big proponent of AA but have seen the emotional devastation that a true narcissist can cause when they weaponize AA knowledge, spiritual connection and working the steps.
In order for any therapy to be successful you have to have some kind of empathy.
If they are truly willing, they can learn different behaviors, but they never come from the heart or become natural reactions. It’s like reprogramming a robot to behave differently. It will never feel genuine to the partner which ends up being disappointing because they are looking for real human interaction. You never get that from a narc.
Jenelle is the kind of wife he should be able to say that to. That is a form of intimacy that could hold them together but he wants no intimacy of any kind with any wife but Robyn. Jenelle is trying so hard and he is just pushing her away.
I think he feels like he's cheating on robyn if there is even the slightest form of intimacy or depth with any of the old wives. He seems kind of repulsed by them. I hope janelle gives up! He has nothing for her.
YES! Friendship, support, these are the things Janelle offers and expects in their relationship. She the exact person who he could say this to if he actually wanted to.
I think he’s convinced that he has all the things he needs in Robyn. Kody doesn’t need a ”friend” wife anymore - Robyn is his friend. He doesn’t appreciate the uniqueness of the individual. If Robyn can fill the need that Janelle used to, he just sees Janelle as superfluous. Forget their shared history and what she brought to his life, she is just no longer of use.
Let‘s not forget he also has adoring other women at Robyn’s. Aurora and Breanna have taken the place of his other wives when he needs a crowd to awe with his “specialness”. They fawn over him and fight for his attention just as his wives used to do. He’s got exactly what he needs at the house on the hill - little kids who look up to daddy, women to fight for his attention, and one man when he needs to prove he’s masculine. Everyone else in his life - including his other children - are obsolete.
I think that for Kody “loyalty” is huge. If you’re not loyal to him, then he doesn’t feel “safe” with you.
Meri showed she wasn’t loyal with the cat fishing incident. Boom. She’s no longer safe.
Christine showed she wasn’t loyal with her response to his one house plans. Boom. Not safe.
Then COVID was his ultimate loyalty test. Janelle failed, Robyn passed. So now Janelle isn’t safe.
Now Kody realizes 3/4 of his wives/exes aren’t loyal and therefore aren’t safe. He’s mad as hell, because he bought into this religion where men are literal gods and women take their word as religious dogma, but now he’s realizing that that’s not the situation he’s in. Maybe it never was or maybe his wives changed. But the grounding principal that he thought anchored his life no longer exists and he is a little lost child. Only Robyn gives him the security of feeling like everything is how he thinks it should be. Therefore only Robyn is “safe.”
Loyalty or obedience? Because those are different things.
I don’t think Kody gets the distinction. I agree with you though.
☝️Yes. He doesn’t see any distinction between the two. If you’re loyal, then you’re obedient.
The thing he failed to realize that when he made his "submissive" women be headships for years they became strong, independent women who realized they did not need a man to tell them what to do.
I also wonder how much impact the show had. They started it to show the world what a (supposedly) functional polygamous marriage looks like. The problem is that when they opened that window into their family it went both ways. The wives became exposed to more ideas. They got questions from producers and interviews “why did you do and say X?” They were likely things they’d never taken time to think about before and just accepted that that’s how it was done. They started seeing people tell them on social media that they were getting a bum deal and shouldn’t stand for it.
If everything happened in their lives (marriage to Robyn, separate houses in Vegas, etc), but they just didn’t have the show filming and airing it, I wonder if the wives would have actually became as strong as they did. I know you can’t really separate them (eg would they have moved without the show? Married Robyn without it?). But it’s an interesting thought experiment in whether it was the actual actions of Kody or the exposure that came from becoming national figures that contributed more to the wives’ increased independence.
He never really has understood words, he uses them inappropriately many times.
Yes! Not Emotionally safe = not respected = not communicating = > not obeying every command from King Kody
By saying that, didn't he just say it?
But he says it on camera, in a talking head, rather than to Janelle.
Because he’s trying to excuse what he said on film when he later does the talking head.
Omg wonder if this will be his out during any hard questions at the tell-all
Oh I see, but Janelle will see it now.
I think he says these things after the fact so that he can kind of cover his ass and make out that there’s a genuine reason for his behaviour, when in fact, he’s just the worst person ever.
I agree. He acts as if we haven't seen how unjust he's been treating his three wives for the benefit of one and her children.
Yeah, but a year and a half later so not super helpful if you are trying to "reset the relationship" in August/September of 2021.
Exactly. His broken-man comment routine doesn’t air til over a year has passed, so it’s beyond useless.
Hopefully to little to late, but I doubt it.
I could see her still loving him, that's hard to undo, but she seems to Like him. That just blows my mind.
The pussy never says what he means to anyones face.
I hope Kody keeps swallowing that red pill and finds himself alone and angry at the end of it all. Truely what he deserves.
yeah and kody's feelings have been super mysterious to everyone because he never expresses anything, so there's no way for janelle to know that he's unhappy. especially since he was so calm and level-headed during their family meeting. /s
And sometimes it doesn't feel 'safe'. It feels vulnerable to say you're hurting. But you have to get over your fear and open up anyways. If the other person then responds unempathetic, than you have a case. But until he tries it's not Janelles fault that he is feeling vulnerable. He seems to have picked up Robyns anxiety. Can't deal with feeling vulnerable and than acts like that's someone else's fault. He and Roby are really very alike and isolating themselves this way.
The way they use the word safe makes me want to smack the tv
My heart hurts for janelle. She accepts as little as possible, asks for basically nothing. She just wants consistency and to know he won’t quit. She wants to know his promises mean something like coyote pass and their marriage. She’s clinging for any piece of hope he can give her and he just destroys it as every turn but at the same time won’t pull the plug. He wants her on the line like meri, waiting for the day he will need them without giving anything in return.
Janelle, you can have a low maintenance relationship with someone who truly loves you and who you love. You don’t even have to live together. Regardless you deserve better and I hope you find your freedom. A friend doesn’t financially abuse you and scapegoat you constantly. Kody is not worth your friendship
Our marriage is fundamentally wrong, we need to fix this, we need to communica—- hold that thought! My food is here and I can’t eat it cold.
I hope it's a Rice Krispies Turkey!
Watching Kody's interview segments is like watching an exhausted toddler cycle between hysterical crying and hysterical laughing while they try to fight being put to bed. He literally doesn't even make sense from sentence to sentence. It's WILD.
This is so eerily accurate….
Well this made me want a whole different show. Celebrity Therapy. We sit it on a “Celebrity” group anger management therapy session and you just turn them lose and the first one who can make a coherent point gets to leave the session for the day.
First season cast
God I can’t stand the Herschel walker commercials
I live in Georgia and just voted Warnock. I was supposed to mail in vote but “mailing irregularities” made that impossible
Yay!! Thanks for voting against that psycho!
I voted for Warnock on Tuesday!
If my husband asked me to help him heal his heartbreak from another woman, I would help him with a 2X4 to the face I made special out of one of his peeled logs.
I finally understand why Kody keeps hauling logs away from Robyn.
Lol, same girl, same!!!
I feel like Janelle needs better friends, if her concept of a best friend is Kody.
Also, him more concerned about his food getting cold than what his wife was expressing says a lot.
He was backed into a corner and couldn’t talk himself out of it
I couldn’t believe that he didn’t even say that back to her. Like, not even, “you’re my best friend too, but o feel like we’re just friends and not a couple any more”. There’s just….he gives *nothing*.
She’s not in love with him anymore. She said so. She feels ‘affection’ (her words) ‘not love’ (also her words). She’s beginning the process of uncoupling. She’s doing it very differently than Christine, but she’s doing it.
THIS!!!!!!! I couldn't believe I had to scroll so far to find a mention of the biggest deal in that clip- the fact that Janelle is starting to realize (and openly admit) that she doesn't love him anymore.
Yep, this is it right here. This phase can last years (projecting from my own experience lol) and I feel like her saying she doesn't throw in the towel is also a last hurrah trying to convinced herself she can make it work.
If he continues to put no effort and if she continues to process the uncoupling she will reach a point where it will become clear. By that time, the grieving process will become emotional, but her analytical side will have arrived to a conclusion. She seemed to be have a very good grasp. Just that statement about not loving him that way says a lot.
Will she simply accept the situation or want more for herself, we will have to see.
First off, how can you be broken hearted when you have stated many, many, many, may times you neither loved or even like Christine.
Secondly, yes Janelle you do walk away from marriage, because you did it when you divorced Meri’s brother.
How is Kody her best friend when he can’t even treat her with respect? I don’t think she understands fully what friendship is.
Kody isn't sad because his wife who he loves left him, he is "sad" because he is a narcissist and Christine leaving bruised his ego
A couple of times he let the true sentiment — anger — slip out, but he framed it as “when the anger passes, I’ll be totally broken-hearted.” Bitch, no. You will go from actively angry to bitter with occasional flare-ups of rage for the rest of your chaotic, self-centered, meaningless life.
He just said to say they were close would be and overstatement, and THATS her best friend???? These people are NEVER on the same page lol.
That was odd, “to say we’re close is an overstatement” but then wants her to help heal his broken heart? Make sense kody!
Right, and its just weird overall not to be close to your own spouse, I swear these people are so weird. Like I have a best friend (female) and my husband has a best friend (male), however there is no one in the world that we are closer to than each other, we are number one in each other's lives.
This is Kody speak for “choose me over Christine”
It seems like he’s trying to figure out how to say, don’t ask anything from me, but don’t leave either, because I’ve just been left by one wife.. He seems like he’s trying to convince her to admit that they never had a “real” marriage. Anything to keep from being the bad guy who also doesn’t want to be a husband.
Very sad that he's been her only friend for all these years. I don't even think she and Christine were good friends until recently. Christine probably didn't confide in her about kody until recently and even if she tried, janelle wouldn't want to be involved. Now she sees she can be friends with Christine, but up until recently she basically just had kody.. Her kids probably helped her see Christine's pov imo
I basically made this statement above. I hope that in her true friendship with Christine she will see she doesn’t need kody, he’s not a friend.
Yes, and I think her kids are her friends now too. Hopefully she makes some outside friends although I'm sure it's not easy after having your life on tv for 12 years. Plus she's an intravert. But yes, kody is only friends with those who can do something for him
Kody didn’t want any of them to be close. I’m certain they were terrified to confide in each other because Kody encouraged ratting each other out. He needed to be the center of each of their universes and probably told each of them that the others were always talking shit about them.
When he saw Janelle and Christine getting closer, he hijacked that with the one house deal. C and J had a bit of a falling out during that and I’m sure it was orchestrated by Kody.
I hope through her genuine friendship with christine and seeing functional relationships amongst her kids and their partners, that she will have a better understanding as to what friendship and loyalty is. I can tell janelle has a good heart and it shouldn’t be wasted on kody.
Ahhhh yes… Janelle needs to heal his broken heart from another wife that left him… that seems fair.
Exactly! Plus janelle is just trying to survive. She doesn't have time to sit and let him sulk. She doesn't even have a house that he'll stay at while sulking. He must mean let him just sit at Robyn's and not do any planning bc he's too upset
The whole time I watch this i think "what about what your wived want? What about their needs?".
Not only does he require the wives to cater to his wants he alwmso requires them to cater to robyn. All he does is put on his gloves and help people move shit. How frustrating
I feel like the Sister Wives franchise was some type of social experiment that has the end message of it being better off to just marry one person. This is a multi-car pileup at this point and people are hurting.
TLC should try to find another plural marriage to work with. Kind of like the Real Housewives franchise. “Sister Wives - Montana”. I’d love to see Kody and Robyn’s mouths hanging open when TLC would announce that!!
Exactly. I wish the show would address the fundamental issue of - is polygamy viable for anyone???
This is actually sad. You know that “best friend” all girls had in middle school where looking back they treated you awful and told the whole school you used pads instead of tampons. Yeah that’s Janelle with her Kody is my best friend energy. Like girl he is awful, go be best friends with Christine who actually likes you.
God what a whiny, selfish little bitch Kody is
Janelle starts off with a nice dig at Christine, which is unfortunate, “I’m not someone who throws the towel in on a marriage”. That’s a little out of line but okay.
Her saying Kody is her best friend is crazy, from what we see he is a complete ass and treats her and their children like shit and that’s your best friend?!
“To say I’m close to Janelle would be an overstatement”. He has really given up completely on every wife that isn’t named Robyn.
“There’s something fundamentally wrong with us” (lunch)
“Why does she think I’m singing the breakup song?” (Talking head)
Does he really not see and understand what he says from one day to the next.
To use Kody’s own words: there’s something fundamentally wrong with Kody Brown.
Also didn’t Jenelle divorce her first husband?
Yep she divorced Meri's brother.
I always wondered if Janelle’s kids call him Uncle Adam. Just add in the creepy flavor.
Janelle and Adam lived together less than a year. So she *can* throw in the towel. Granted, it's probably a bigger deal when you've been together 30 years and have six kids together.
I didn’t read that as a dig at Christine, more like trying to say she doesn’t give up easily on marriage but they’re having problems she isn’t sure they can fix.
Agreed. She wasn't thinking about Christine when she said that. Only thinking about how she's perceived when she leaves
Me neither. And Janelle said very clearly that she doesn’t blame Christine for leaving, and that Christine worked at fixing her marriage for years and years.
Yeah, I didn’t either. She’s seen Christine try and try and try. Divorce after 27 years isn’t throwing in the towel.
Neither did I. I honestly don’t think Janelle would do that.
I really do not think her comment on throwing in the towel was a dig at Christine. On the contrary, she has repeatedly stated that Christine tried to make it work for years and years. She has been so supportive and a “dig” at Christine is directly opposed to everything Janelle has been saying/doing this season.
That being said, I’m sure she made that comment to make it clear that leaving her marriage would mean it got to the point where it was absolutely intolerable for her—it’s not something she’d do on whim, based on one disagreement, etc. I think that comment implies that she is going to leave Kody and she wants it be known that it had to be really, really bad for her to have done so.
He really is erasing history now
I don’t think Kody thinks about what he has said or will say, he expects everyone to believe the shit that comes out of his mouth he says he is the victim and nothing is his fault so believe that because he is said so. It’s laughable, we all saw him and his actions but Kody still expects us to just listen to what he says. Kody left his wives the minute he married Robyn, for many years now he pretended to care about his other marriages because he needed the show to keep going and that is what he is concerned with now, Christine leaving is threatening the TLC money because we see polygamy is not what he is living. I can’t believe how fast he is now going after Janelle but Kody has to set up his excuses for why it’s not working with Janelle so it’s not his fault.
Yeah I really think he saw he could have no real marriage with Meri and she would accept it and not leave therefore she is required to put money into the family pot, which we all know he and Robyn controls. So now I really think he is trying to do the same with Christine and Janelle. You could see how shocked and angry he was when Christine didn’t go along with it like Meri did. I wonder if Janelle will be willing to be just another Meri in this family of Kody and Robyn’s….
He had to run the conversation by Robyn and then react on the talking head.
When she said I’m not someone who throws the towel in on a marriage my first thought was you are because you did with your first marriage. Then she goes on to tell him he is her best friend while he is telling the world they are not even close. It seems to be a thing with this family that each wife has a completely different conception of their marriage to Kody than he has. They really need to hear what this jerk says about them in his talking heads.
They have no concept that for most people, it’s a little weird to have six kids with someone you don’t feel close to. I get that polygamy is basically marriages of convenience but they don’t seem to realize this can seem icky. Yet another reason many do not care for the idea of polygamy.
I don't know if the dig was intentional. I don't think Janelle thinks that Christine threw in the towel. I bet she thinks Christine tried to make it work.
So maybe she stays to spite him. It's really the only power she has in the relationship, unless she wants to do her own tell all.
I didn’t interpret that as a dig at Christine, just because Janelle acknowledged that Christine tried and struggled for many years. Christine should have left many years ago, but stuck it out for the family. I feel like Janelle is just starting to reach that point of realization that the marriage isn’t working anymore, where Christine knew for years.
This is so fucking awkward
Janelle saying she isn’t someone “who throws the towel in on a marriage”. Girl, you divorced your first husband after 10 months.
This made me snort! She freaking did. She always left the Brown family for awhile. She’s just older and more trapped. I have a lot of empathy for her but why do they all have to rewrite history SO much?
I don't really see this as "rewriting history" like Kody, Meri, and Robyn do. They completely change things they said in recent episodes, contradicting their own statements. Janelle got divorced many years ago and people can change a lot over that length of time, especially with religious influence. It's likely that she isn't who she was when she got divorced from her first person.
He literally says something is fundamentally wrong with them to Janelle but then in the confessional he says he doesn’t understand why she thinks he’s singing the break-up song. Ummm…
Seeing Janelle say that he’s her best friend and who she wants to tell everything to was sad. He had no response. She’s not Robyn, so he doesn’t care.
The writer(s) and editor(s) clearly do not watch the show. How is Janelle the third wife and Christine was the second wife?
He has just lost Christine and he is “broken hearted “. Why not learn something from that experience? Treat Jenelle better so she won’t leave. This conversation has convinced me that he wants a monogamous relationship with Robyn and is trying to get the other wives to leave. Just be honest dude!!
But then he loses the money from the show
Narcissists are great at defining and redefining reality, and can often be charming or persuasive enough to convince others. Kody no longer demonstrates whatever charm he once had but he’s still used to steering everything. Also, he’s the expert on everything and isn’t used to being challenged so that’s fun for him now that some of the fairy have wised up.
Janelle saying I'm not one to throw in the towel on a marriage is her expressing that the issues are severe if she's considering throwing in the towel. She's basically saying I don't end marriages lightly. I don't take it as a dig on Christine or a rewrite of history. I take it as expressing how bad their relationship is at this point.
Hey Janelle, your "best friend" stole all your money and gave it to his real wife. With friends like that, who needs enemies?
I'm speechless. This man keeps getting worse and worse.
He is SUCH an asshole.
Hes breaking up with her. It's as clear as day. Why can't she see it?
She wants to get her house built so she has an asset in her name. Then she’ll leave.
Well that was uncomfortable to watch. He definitely has zero romantic feelings for her. He won’t even look at her.
I think Janelle would be totally fine without the romance in their relationship. She seems to want to be valued as a partner to him, an equal. Here she is, doing EXACTLY what he publicly screamed at Christine for not doing and he shuts her right down because he doesn’t want his food to get cold. WOW.
Back when they moved to Vegas janelle even said there had been no romance in their relationship for a long time. So this isn’t new. Christine said it herself, janelle can fill her own tank. I think janelle is at the point where she feels like she was fucked over by a business partner instead of seeing it as a romantic relationship ending.
I think there’s a fundamental reason for the different actions of Janelle and Christine. Christine has rejected the Mormon religion. She no longer has faith in the idea of celestial marriage. Janelle, on the other hand, still holds fast to her Mormon faith and beliefs.
As a Catholic, I find Mormonism rather fascinating. It has all the trappings of sacred tradition with the fervor of the fundamentalist movement.
Oh good grief! He wants sympathy? Janelle was the ONLY one crying over Christine leaving! I think maybe she needs sympathy more than he does.
He needs a clue by four..
Not true. Robyn sobbed in Meri's arms in the driveway. Because Christine didn't want to work on the nonexistent relationship they had. Poor Robyn....
Janelle is smart enough to see what's coming, but she might be putting her plan into action too late for it to matter.
Christine is gone and Kody needs a new basement wife. Meri doesn't fit the bill because Kody doesn't consider them married anymore. That leaves Janelle in the crosshairs. Janelle has nothing - no home Kody wants to come to, no tender age children Kody wants to spend time with. Janelle and Kody's marriage is non-existant because of covid, housing, etc, not to mention that it was never built on love to begin with. Janelle's only friend in this family was Christine, and she just bailed. Janelle doesn't have a good relationship with Robyn either, how long can she expect Kody to overlook that with Christine gone?
Janelle can try and salvage the marriage with Kody and/or build a house so she has an asset for the future. But as we can see from this clip, Kody isn't exactly jumping at the idea of fixing things or letting her build. He sees an out and he wants to be down to 1 wife.
I see this as Janelle trying to temporarily put a band-aid on the situation until she gets her exit strategy ready, the question will be whether she can hold out long enough to execute it.
It’s unfortunate but Janelle royally fucked up her own finances. I feel like she might as well just leave with nothing, Coyote Pass is never happening.
Isn’t it odd that the lack of relationship between janelle and robyn or janelle and meri hasn’t been a point of contention for kody? It only mattered that christine didn’t love robyn.
On Janelle seeing Kody as her best friend-
We do have to remember that they moved a lot and the family was all they had a lot of the time. Every 3 days, she had a partner to talk to after the kids were asleep, to take her to dinner, to tell about her week. I think (well, we know) as the family has pulled apart she was abandoned by this partner who only shows up now and then to peel a log, and as the kids are growing and no longer the moms' primary focus 24/7, she and Christine both realized they could actually have that relationship with each other. IMO Christine and Janelle have become best friends, Janelle is still just struggling to realize that. It's hard to think of someone as your best friend and then one day realize they actually aren't anymore. Like....when did that happen? But I think she's there.
The scraps these women are willing to accept from this man….I don’t understand.
It’s not Janelle’s responsibility to ‘help you heal’ Kody. That’s on you.
Okay so back in the day (the early seasons and before Robyn too) you can see that Kody and Janelle had a good and platonic close friend relationship. He even stated he viewed Janelle as his best friend. They got along really well as friends and talked a lot. I think Janelle knew how to talk to Kody and offer sound advice even if it wasn’t always what he wanted to hear in a calm manner (vs Robyn who I think manipulates him with her “advice”).
Now since flagstaff maybe even before as the kids started leaving and once he legally married Robyn he started distancing himself from Janelle (she called that) and fully devoted himself to Robyn. Since he and Robyn don’t really work though they need TLC and MLM money. Kody is clearly trying to keep Janelle just on a string long enough so she stays to continue to support Kody and Robyn but pushing her away emotionally so that he can just be in a romantic relationship with Robyn. He did the same with Christine he just didn’t expect her to have the back bone to stand up to him, financially support herself and leave.
I also think Kody has that guy complex of treating someone really poorly (Meri and Janelle) that they eventually leave on their own so he can be the victim and act like he got left and is scorned (exactly what he did to Christine) luckily as the audience we get to see first hand how much Kody and Robyn have contradicted themselves, and manipulated everyone around them. Heck just be monogamous Kody and be happy it’s clearly what you want and stop being emotionally and financially abusive and manipulative towards your ex wives (let’s be honest they all became exes the second he got legally married to Robyn).
What the fuck is he trying to say? Why can’t he be direct?
His brain is scrambled. This is his best version of coherence.
Let's not over complicate Kody's emotions here, it's pretty simple. His ego is bruised because Christine left and is happy without him. He knows Janelle is still close with Christine, and that also hurts his ego, yet again. Robyn and Meri have proven their loyalty to him vs Christine, and he wants Janelle to do the same. He's couching it in terms of them not being close anymore, but the real issue is that he wants her to be angry and Christine and tell him how it's not his fault and Christine is just a meany head. That's all.
Janelle's independence, which had not previously bothered Kody, is now a reminder of the way Christine left him. And he doesn't want that. His desire to put her in Christine's house, this whole song and dance about patriarchy and needing to be "closer" in their relationship, all of it. It all comes down to him needing to protect his fragile ego. He knows this divorce is going to be televised, he needs Janelle on his side so that everyone can see just how *right* he is and how much Christine's leaving was a *betrayal*.
Kody's ego is hurt. That's it. End of story.
Anything that is uncomfortable or could make Kody look like the bad guy isn’t “safe” for him. He is so full of shit.
Remember when kody used to be proud of his different relationships with each wife? He was getting something unique from each one and would brag about it often.
When he says “it’s not safe enough,” he wants us to believe that the problem is with Janelle when it’s obvious that he just isn’t comfortable expressing any emotion besides anger. That doesn’t feel safe because being vulnerable is hard for everyone, always. But that’s not Janelles fault.
Kody (basically): I’m not in love with you, this marriage is broken
Also kody: I don’t understand why she’s acting like I’m doing the breakup speech.
Uhhh sir 🧐
The season is going to end with her leaving. Does anyone know when the season finale is?
I think it will end with a cliffhanger. Just one or maybe 2 more episodes
What in the sperm-shaped eyebrows is Kody eating?
I would also like to know. It looked like he picked up a chicken leg and bit the bone right off.
What’s sad here is that I bet in a lot of polygamist families, wives do end up in situations where they don’t love their husband but the do find them good friends. Maybe Janelle is aromantic and that’s why polygamy was appealing to her. Maybe she did love Kody at one point but it’s faded into platonic friendship. There’s nothing wrong with staying married to someone who’s just become a best friend. The real problem is that Kody is giving up polygamy and he’s not being overt about it. He does not want to deal with the emotional burden of anyone but Robyn. He doesn’t want to have to go see Janelle, see her kids, stay in her RV. He just doesn’t want to. He wants to be a monogamous so badly right now, and his ego/pride/childhood trauma from his dad/whatever isn’t letting him be honest with himself or his wives. And he’s a piece of shit because of it.
Janelle, you aren’t getting a best friend for life in Kody. He’s done taking care of you. Move on.
Love Janelle but 2 things: she says she isn’t the type to throw in the towel on marriage but she did divorce Meri’s brother. Hard to believe he was a bigger jerk than Kody. Also, I’m glad she has recognized that she may not be in love with him anymore.
I think we are seeing the seeds of the final breakup. This is probably savanah’s last year in high school. I’m guessing she has a plan in place for her life once savannah goes off to college. I hope her next chapter is awesome and Kody-free
My take… stay with me here. I cannot stand browbyn and kootie, but… I think he married the og wives because he thought that’s what you do, it’s how this works, they are great, love having kids, unlimited attention for me… Then he met browbyn and actually fell in love, narc and narc heaven. He’s always had the og wives to pay his way, now let them pay OUR way and live in our McMansion with the adult kids we baby so they can never leave us!
I wish Janelle would move on and prioritize herself 😔
Kody saying it isn’t safe to ask Janelle to help him “hill” his heartbreak because of the divorce? What he really means is she won’t talk shit about Christine with him. He’s such a boob.
It is so frustrating how these people NEVER say what they mean! I’m sure Nancy was thrilled when they moved to Flagstaff. She probably had a bon fire with Kody and Meri’s file.
> “It’s almost like we’re on the cusp of this empty nest thing and it feels like we need to do a reset,” Janelle says, to which Kody replies, “I don’t know.”
This is a major thing that I don’t think Kody understands when it comes to his OG 3. Their kids are almost all (in meri’s case ALL) out of the house. It’s not unusual for a monogamous relationship to falter at that time because suddenly the kid(s) aren’t there to distract anymore. That’s why it’s so important to always nurture your relationship with your partner. At the end of the day it will be you two. Unfortunately Kody is still in little kid phase with Robyn and has used it as an excuse to neglect his other relationships, leaving those women to feel alone and neglected. But now it’s to a point where (like in Christine’s case) there is no repairing it. The damage is done. The chasm is too wide. I think he is swiftly approaching that with Jenelle too.
“I want to eat something before it gets cold. “ Yeah, that pretty much sums up Kody’s level of involvement in helping his marriage to Janelle along.
I feel like every scene of Kody for the last several episodes has been him suffering deeply because he feels too vulnerable to not only share how he's really feeling, but even to really feel what he's *really* feeling. He's understanding that anger is the emotion he's using to cover up his hurt and fear. I feel for Kody because I can see that he's going through a lot of deaths. His entire life is crumbling before his eyes at its very foundation. He built his entire life around his religion and polygamy, and with all that in question the very ground beneath his feet is crumbling. We get to watch the crisis that men go through from learning that emotions are weak and so being unable to help themselves. He doesn't know how to feel it, and he doesn't know how to express it, and he feels like he's in his own lonely prison cell.
He’s so full of shit
He said he isn't safe enough to tell her he is hurting... yet he just did in the last sentence to the camera. LOL. COME ON KODY.
That's so sad. He is all but telling her to fuck off. Run, Janelle..... get out of there. He doesn't care about you.
I think it's clear he just wants out! He does not want anyone but robyn. He wants the money from the show do he does want janelle and meri to play for the cameras.
So sick of him saying he doesnt "feel safe" with his wives 😑
It’s clear to me that he’s clumsily setting the table for rejecting Jenelle for disloyalty and shoving her out. He wants one wife and coyote pass for his new fahmalee. He needs to be hogtied and his head shaved. His noodles may be the source of his assholiness. Fact.
It doesn't even occur to Kody that Janelle may also be mourning the loss of Christine from their family. And Christine was arguably a larger presence in Janelle's life, so it's probably a greater loss for her. Kody wants compassion and validation from everyone, but refuses to give it to anyone else. So his downward spiral continues.
Janelle would be crazy to every rely on Kody. He is a taker, he will user her but never support her.
this is just sad. it does seem pretty clear that she actually likes Kody for whatever reason but I was shocked to hear her say she doesn't think it's love
I think of the recent Christine interview where she said something like, "and Janelle...who still talks to Kody..." many people picked up on it because it's an odd way to phrase a husband and wife. sounded more like they are done but still communicate with one another
he really screwed over the OG 3 once Robyn was in the picture. he was just too much of a coward to end it entirely so he instead dragged them along in unhappy relationships for another decade
I think their marriage would be fine … if he didn’t have another wife and one he favors at that. Polygamy is stupid.