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Legitimate-Data9169

Same kids whos abo is working long hours at factories, taxi etc both weekends and normal days, are hating him because he does not have enough time over


zombie_kiler_42

Generalizing anything is hard difficult and wrong. But living in the motherland let me offer my perspective I have met some of the best dads everz going out of thier way not only providing but making time for thier child (be it boy or girl) I have seen (and is related to ) fathers that have no idea whats going on with thier kids, they dumped on a wife/sister/family member only to call here and there and ask if they are okay. I have seen fathers that work their ass out but aren't the type to make the idealized quality time for thier kids, usually because they are trying thier best just to be a provider and its all that they have ever known, also these fathers will occasionally be called to discipline the child. I have seen fathers simple become a sperm-donar to 7 or so kids and then simply bounce. Yes bounce whatever the differences between the parents no parent should have the entire burden of the child if the other is still alive and well. Now my personal opinion is that the reason we talk about this more with the father is because its more often than not, the sensitive years of growth are usually taken care by the mother, its more common between the sexes for the father to abandon the child than it is the mother, and its the same across multiple cultures, the African American dad gone for cigarettes trope or the African Father who simply leaves is something ppl have echoed because it has actually happened, How common is it idk, but you can tell specially the bar is so low that when you hear of single somali mother whose man is MIA, ppl will be like that *caruurteeda haysata* to simply console the fact that she married a dead beat, but when the father is the one raising the child *ma sha Allah waa aabe wanagsan......oo mu guursado* or something of the sort. So point i am trying to make, is yes bad somali fathers exist, also good somali fathers exist..... trying to generalize human behavior is never fulfilling, qnd always pointless and leads to horrible disagreements, precisely because everyone falls to certain category...


Houston-13

It’s ungrateful Gen Z kids that keep spreading that idea


beninhana

Mixed Habeshi here , it’s a similar thing in our community and in many other ethnic groups in ethiopia . I feel since we all have transitioned from the traditional value systems of our ancestors we don’t have the level of traditional reverence for our fathers due to modernization and enjoying a loving and attentive mom then a hardline dad who disciplines us. Me I appreciate the ass whoopings from my father it made me not become an entitled asshole like a lot of Habeshi diaspora but I wish my dad had time to teach me a lot of guy things that I had to learn on my own ( like shooting guns , hunting etc) .


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beninhana

Like I’m Habeshi but my family is retarded mix if I go back I probably have every ethnic group 😂


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[deleted]

Why are you getting angry at him?


boomstickkid

Oh didn't realize that's how it came off. Thats what my friends and I call mixed people. Ethiopians especially are mostly all mixed with amhara/oromo/gurage/sidamo/tigray, etc. Huge mutts but I actually love Ethiopians despite my hate for the state.


active-tumourtroll1

Its thank to a combo of those who just up and left and those that spend most of their days in coffee shops. Those 2 groups along with others basically doing jack shit at home and influences from western femenism has all added together to form a large enough cohort who have a negative view of the men in our society and instead of disproving them with hard work. We have people just shitting on them as if that's going to magically transform them(i.e. those complaining about the failures of the men in our community).


RiskyyyRondo

Nah if you drive by the Somali market in my town, all you'll see is Somali dads drinking shaax and playing ladoo or just chatting, all day every day. Obviously there's a lot of good dads too tho


Expensive_Flamingo44

I don't agree with the slander however the question is how many deadbeats mom have you seen? Even when the dad works most Hooyos are still working as the dad income is never enough. Most somali moms work. They work part time cook, clean and try to teach their children something when they can. What a mom does and dad does cannot be ever compared. This is why the mom is said 3 times and the dad is said once.


ugc_12n

They think the wife has to do all the work it’s dumb mindset some non West fathers have but we also have a lots of great somali fathers who work their ass of for their family but u will always see the negative more then the positive


Crylec

Don't know about y'all, but when you got a dad who managed to get his family to the US and worked 3 jobs and made time for his kids. It be reasonable to call him a hero.


mastermanifestorsss

I think they genuinely believe that their role is solely to provide & that’s it. Also, maybe they find it difficult to get along with their wives. Thirdly, maybe they had a lot of responsibility when they were younger & did the dad role without having kids so when they do have kids they’re kind of tired of it. These are some of my reasonings.


tough647

fatherless mfs try to cope by projecting their abo onto us than theres people with wonderful abos but like to think their dad is special always saying "except my dad" after their bullshit comment


[deleted]

A lot of fathers were horrible and left their families in poverty


Odd-Ad-572

Ik that but enough for the entire image of somali fathers to be seen as deadbeats when most of them sacrifice their lives for their families


[deleted]

Because it’s true there’s a lot who abused and left their families, mine did


Odd-Ad-572

Yeah ik and thats sad and all but most dont do that


[deleted]

I’m getting down voted for having no dad


UrAvgMali

No, youre getting downvoted because you are essentially a Parrot, repeating the same nonsense you've heard. I don't have a aaboo as well, he died during the war. I can't even remember what he looks like but you don't see me bitching about it. Every case is different and it is childish to make a generalizing statement, it makes you sound like a raging Femcel.


[deleted]

My personal experience is not parroting. Nobody believes your lies of ‘Somali fathers are the best’


UrAvgMali

lol you illiterate moron. Please quote where i said "Somali fathers are the best" don't worry I'll wait LMAOOOOOO


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[deleted]

Somali fathers are the worst, our generation will be better. Somalis want to sweep problems under the rug


[deleted]

Do you have any sources or actual proof that the majority of Somali men are deadbeat fathers? Or is this your anecdotal experience?


[deleted]

My dad and other dads left their families and I’m still getting down voted for telling the truth


[deleted]

Sorry, I did come across as rude and inconsiderate to you earlier. What father did to your family is disgraceful and disgusting. Most of the Somali kids where I grew up, lived in a 2 parent household and their fathers worked. Just because their fathers provided and didn't run off on them, doesn't make them great fathers either. Tbh, I have no idea what these men are like behind closed doors. I can only speak for my father. We had different experiences with our fathers but that doesn't discount your experiences.


happygiraffe404

Mine is good alhamdulillah, but can't lie and say that most I've seen are. They're basically missing. I'm not talking about the ones that are not there because they're busy working all the time, can't blame someone for being absent when they're absent because of work. But too many of them are spending too much time outside at the coffee shop or somewhere all day, or dividing time between 10 kids living in two different households so they're not able to even get to know each child's needs and personality properly. They don't even know which grades their kids are in. Some simply up and disappear. Meanwhile, hoyo is doing it all while sometimes working outside of the house as well. How does she manage you ask? With the help of the older kids. So the kids are being raised by hoyo and the older kids. It's not all of them, but enough of them do that to cause issues with their kids. The stereotype isn't coming out of nowhere. Denying it won't help, first step to solving a problem is recognising that the problem exists.


Isitmeamitheproblem

Mine is alright alhamdulillah, he has always been there for us and tried his best ig. But things is the mothers in our culture and outside they always work at home or than the man do. They also always spent time with their own children more however there is man out there that barley give any time to their own children. But they have time to go to coffee shops and spent so much time there. And if they woman does the same thing they people around her will her out and “crazy”.


MindOverMatter2016

We all got agendas to push, that’s one of them


[deleted]

A lot of Somali dads are fucked up but people want to hide it, it will be brought to light


Expensive_Flamingo44

Not alot come on but yes not discussed enough. Not held accountable enough. Their issues get stuffed under the carpet. Those Aabos are not punished for their neglect. Please do not generalise all Aabos many do work hard.


vivi9090

Mostly just the BLM halimo's who throw shade on Somali fathers. Never heard a single Somali man talk shit about Somali fathers anywhere. Its always the brainwashed feminist halimo's.


ImmediatePrize9477

I never understood why gen z defame and insult their fathers like I've never seen a somali father neglecting his kids meanwhile he is out here breaking his back to provide for his family. I'm not saying there aren't dad's who do neglect or don't care for their kids but they're the minority. These people are (in my opinion) trying to adopt the image some community has in America (only ever seen people from that country bashing their fathers / somali fathers).


Realistic-Art777

Because MOST Somali fathers are fucking useless and basically only a sperm donor 🤬 Edit: no not fucking reply to me if you're not gonna agree


Twuwi

Somali woman toxic


Isitmeamitheproblem

Which Somali woman broke your heart ?


Own-Ad-8837

yeah for real


Stunning_Blueberry94

They work extremely hard and keep the money to themselves.


AcrobaticCut3

Why do somali teens commit so much crime?