T O P
sunshinelollipoops

Canada here. Some common ones I’ve heard to replace “Mississippi” are “one thousand”, “steamboat”, and “motherfucker”


tredbobek

When Im in the gym and have to count seconds I use thousands, but motherfucker might be better. Cursing gives you +10% strength


silverskull39

I am hereby adopting "one motherfucker, two motherfucker, [...]" Edit: yes, I get it, Sam Jackson. No more, pls k thx bai.


sunshinelollipoops

I hope you raise those motherfuckers well


LambiiiBwoy

I just hope they don’t come from the same mother


RolandDeepson

wow


[deleted]

I’ll raise you with chesterfield and return your manners.


ind3pend0nt

Surprise motherfucker


CollisionAttractor

heart eyes, motherfucker


Rare_Geologist_4418

French fries, motherfucker


anakinkskywalker

all rise, motherfucker 🧑‍⚖️


lameturkey

Some pies motherfucker!


elmariachigordo

Wrong size, motherfucker


throwawayRA2018148

Dead flies, Motherfucker


aggressive_celery_

Supplies, motherfucker


ChangeVampire

Twoprise motherfucker ...Threeprise motherfucker?


surfdad67

The Sam Jackson method


UberS8n

Came here for the one thousand, left with a motherfucker


More-Masterpiece-561

Definitely gonna teaxh that to my kids when I have em


visual-curve

>and “motherfucker” When Samuel L Jackson is your 1st grade teacher.


mrjake118

"Alright class, today we're going to learn about the metric system! Now, do you know what they call a quarter-pounder with cheese in France?"


Quiet_paddler

"American?"


dlarman82

Congratulations, you're stupid in 2 languages


Iree383

American't


More-Masterpiece-561

I want Samuel to be my teacher. That would be fun


OvertSpy

I dunno, didnt he hold a school at gunpoint at one time?


ohsopoor

That’s right, forgot. This is an outside of the US thread.


cottagecorefairymama

Canada too, French as 1rst language even, and in my family we either say "Mississippi" or "Hippopotame" Edit : Pretty much only in context to measure time between lightning and thunder to "determine" how close the storm is


ClamPuddingCake

I'm bilingual, and I also use "Mississippi" in English and "hippopotame" in French.


joeyl5

Petit Potame


pikime

Aussie here, all of the above plus wheel barrow


the_colonelclink

In the professional health industries, I’ve heard they prefer ‘1 crocodile, 2 crocodile…’


kanngr

1 Mississauga, 2 Mississauga


TheBloodkill

1 Saskatchewan, 2 Saskatchewan is what we always did at scouts


spongepenis

ayy


amakai

This was actually a recommended way to count distance in my online BDE course.


aydyl

Yeah, in Quebec, we're counting one "bateau" and "mille et something", I find it so interesting that we're doing the same in a different language!


Sin_Seer_Li

Un "bateau-bateau", deux "bateaux-bateaux"


sunshinelollipoops

I’m surprised with the bateau one, I wonder if there’s a historical explanation behind it because I’ve only heard older generations use the steamboat one


Rs_only

One thousand steamboat motherfuckers, two thousand steamboat motherfuckers, Three


rattlingblanketwoman

I feel like "steamboat" doesn't have the same caliber of syllables as the other choices. I guess it's all in how you say it. "Steeeeeeeeamboat." "Steambooooooooat." "Steamyboat" fits the bill!


cindoc75

Fellow Canadian here. I always do one one thousand, two one thousand, etc.


UnfilteredPerception

Would that be motherfucker or motherfuckers for numbers that are greater than one?


sunshinelollipoops

Well you don’t say Mississippis duh


Nibbler1999

People use one one thousand in Minnesota too. Though that's basically Canada I suppose


GokuTheStampede

Texan with Cajun family, and I used "one one thousand" and never heard "one Mississippi" until I was in middle school.


wayward_rivulets

Athabasca.


Shaye_Shayla

The last one just makes me wanna sing Ass backwards by mindless self indulgence now


mikramero

Germany: no. I say 21 slowly, that's 1 second. So to estimate 5 seconds I count 21 to 25. Don't know whether this is common in my country.


ter102

Yes it is that's what I learned in elementary school aswell.


HannaMajesty

Same in Dutch. Only... We do it in Dutch. :-)


Trikehard

We also do this in the Netherlands


1Mandolo1

Kann bestätigen. Also, 21 In English: twenty-one (3 syllables) In German: einundzwanzig (4 syllables and, as all German words, hard consonants in there to make it easy to enunciate)


circlebust

Also bear witness to our glorious trash system of reversing the digits. The literal translation is "oneandtwenty", and this is for all numbers 13 to 99 (and larger numbers with it as subpart). Even as a native, while processing it is no problem, simultaneously writing the numbers down while hearing is seriously difficult.


1Mandolo1

Eh, still better than the French with their four twenty ten nine (4x20+10+9=99) :p


Ceesv23

We in the Netherlands do this aswell


ejcrotty

"ein und zwanzig", "zwei und zwanzig" - "und zwanzig" is so close in time to "one thousand"


Remarkable_Ferret416

Same in Slovak 1,21,2,21,3,21....


Ytrog

Same in The Netherlands 😊


shaky_shrimp

In the UK we say 'elephant'. Or at least that's what I was taught at primary school.


[deleted]

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Bagelman263

How do you say Mississippi for it to be the wrong length?


snootyfungus

In UK English it would be pronounced 'Mississippiinnitgovna', just a bit too long to mark a second.


squidfood

If I learned anything about Worcestershire, they'd pronounce it "Mippi"


Bored-Fish00

We've also got Gloucestershire and Leicestershire too. It's just so we can win at scrabble.


oftenDubious

I hope you’re all able to get your boocestershire shots.


charley_warlzz

Lmaoo that one made me laugh


lmqr

I think it's about rhythym more than length, I wonder how the 'beat' of the elephant one goes


JustAnotherHyrum

> I think it's about rhythym more than length Tell my wife I said hello.


dontdobuttstuff

I say it like “Missipi” because I say it really fast


dwdwdan

For me the I between the s’s disappears slightly, not quite to missippi but the s sound doesn’t quite stop I don’t think


delorf

I am curious too. Mississippi has four syllables while elephant only has three.


audigex

Many (not all) Brits will tend to compress the second I, the one between the S’s It’s still there, but we *almost* say miss-sippi with the middle I being closer to a brief pause or glottal stop, which cuts the length down to being similar to a 3 syllable word because the last syllable (pi) is already short compared to miss, sis, and sipp, even when Americans say it


badfox3d

We use "éléphant" in France too, for once we agree on something my UK friend


audigex

You still put those funny little squiggles around the e’s though, so we least we have *something* to argue about \**shakes fist in the general direction of Calais*\*


PooperOfMoons

In UK I was taught "monkey on a stick" (really!)


FreeSeaweed9875

Piccadilly gang


[deleted]

[удалено]


seanyseanerson

Everyone I know here uses Mississipi. But I'm oretty keen on switching to motherfucker instead.


enkei_8493

One......... Tw...oooooo.....tt..thh..thrree


ImThatTrip

I hate the fact that I understood this lol


ThankeeSai

Chomp


d0gbait

How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie roll center of a Tootsie pop? **The world may never know.**


[deleted]

I hope this is solved in a few years when Universal Pictures, plum out of ideas, buys the rights to those ads and launches a cinematic universe. The Tootsieverse will finally answer where Mr. Owl got his degree and how Mr. Turtle lost his teeth. Gonna be rad.


ibasi_zmiata

...three and a half


JackHyper

In denmark we say one box of beer


OtherworldDk

1 kasseøl, 2 kasserøl, 3 kasserøl ... hvor er det egentligt... meget dansk


GRDavies75

In the Netherlands we use counting from 21 and up. The way we pronounce numbers tends to be long and off course using it to be indicative for time we pronounce it elaboratively (21 = Een-en-twintig, up to 26 - zes-en-twintig - they comprise of 4 syllables) emphasis on the 'en' part which in normal speech isn't the case.


ter102

Ah it's the same in german!


D-Beyond

german here, we do EXACTLY the same. shouldn't be too much of a surprise tho


forchanman

Same for us Afrikaans folks in south africa


Noonnee69

Czech same


neuaufreddit

Austria too


Dotura

No, one thousand and one, one thousand and two...


ProjectDemigod

Interesting, I generally go for Mississippi but I learned a slight variation on this where you always say "[number] one thousand": One one thousand, two one thousand, three one thousand... Never heard it your way


Dotura

Its an old way of counting but many older folks still use it. They say eighth and seventy instead of seventy eight. I never used this rule of counting until my driver's license but was tough it as a way to judge 3 second of distance to the car ahead.


llilaq

In Dutch we still say our numbers in that old order as well. I wonder when it got outdated in English and if we could change it too. One-and-twenty is just so silly,


Dotura

In Norway the new counting method came into official use on the 1. Of July 1951.


Noone_UKnow

Russian native speaker here. No, we definitely don’t say Mississippi, lol. I was taught to say “one second, two seconds, three seconds…” at a specific rate. The words for ‘one’, ‘two’, ‘three’, etc. and ‘sekunda’ (second) take a bit longer to say than they do in English.


pelmasaurio

1 irkutsk 2 irkutsk...


TheFamilyJulezzz

This is an unexpectedly fascinating question


Coattail-Rider

I was just scrolling on by and came back up to it. Adopting *motherfucker* now.


pumpkins_n_mist15

In India we say tick-tick 1, tick-tick 2, etc. I don't know if everyone says it but children certainly do.


i_am_ur_dad

came here to say this! tick-tick 1, tick-tick 2, tick-tick 3, ....


kakikat

i wanna know if canadians say mississauga tbh


moleratical

I think they say Saskatchewan. Like this: "One Saskatchewan, Two Saskatchewan... Fuck, we have two Saskatchewans? Isn't one enough?" They rarely count past two when using this method.


Astralnaptime

I'm Canadian and I've always said Mississippi.


mild_thing

I've lived in Mississauga, and have never heard anyone say that.


Stef-fa-fa

Nah, I grew up saying Mississippi or one thousand.


five-dollars-off

People in Wales do 1 Llanfairpwllgwyngyll­gogery­chwyrn­drobwll­llan­tysilio­gogo­goch, 2 Llanfairpwllgwyngyll­gogery­chwyrn­drobwll­llan­tysilio­gogo­goch , 3 Llanfairpwllgwyngyll­gogery­chwyrn­drobwll­llan­tysilio­gogo­goch


Sabata11792

OP was asking about seconds, not hours.


n______c

…Mississippilessly?


ChocoCat_xo

Lol, I was looking for this comment!


schalk81

One of my favorite words in the English language!


babygirlruth

Was this place **THE SUN**?


pebblysue

r/unexpectedfriends


ladywood777

I'M AN 8.


PickUpYourFries

Aussie here, I do and some of my mates as well, suspect we picked it up watching something from Hollywood.


DuhhIshBlue

We use "1 one thousand, 2 one thousand, 3 one thousand..." too


NotUrAverageBoo

Used it as a kid in the 70’s, but I always thought it was Mrs hippy. I was late teens before I realised it was actually Mississippi. I wondered for years who she was but wasn’t game to ask, as everyone else seemed to know.


-Owlette-

I never did, growing up here. I always did "hippopotamus" or "cattle dog" as a kid.


helpitgrow

I love the two people now have mentioned “cattle dog”.


JJohnston015

Surprising. Australians have a wealth of words similar to Mississippi: Tibooburra, Innamincka, Coober Pedy, Cootamundra, etc., and probably all misspelled.


llodi

In Denmark we used to say ‘ølkasse’ which translate to beer case… This probably says something profound about the Danish society.


Annosz

Reading the comments it seems I'm the odd one but here in Hungary I heard it from multiple people. And not just in English, we even use it in Hungarian, "egy Mississippi, két Mississippi..."


[deleted]

I’ve been doing this in Australian for years, before I even knew wtf Mississippi was - apparently there’s a river there too?


kebabenthusiast03

In Poland we say sto dwadzieścia jeden, sto dwadzieścia dwa ... . It means one hundred twenty one, one hundred twenty two and so on.


jackof47trades

I grew up in the U.S. When we played football we would use “alligator” since it was easier to say.


letsbananasplit369

Im in australia and i do


laughingnome2

I'm in Aus and I say Kangaroo.


Significant-Spite-72

In Aus and I was taught cat and dog 🙂


-Owlette-

Is it possible you misheard it when you were taught that? Because my dad taught me to say "cattle dog". Or maybe I got it wrong 😅


iTookTheLastOne

Might be you or just both are common because I got cat and dog as well.


SoggyIsland8

Same here! Though I don’t use it often. I think there are probably a lot of Australian animals and names in general that could be used. Cassowary maybe?


DisturbedRanga

Did Primary in South Australia and I say Hippopotamus.


MurraMurra

Wow that brings me back, yes I also said hippopotamus!


ObviousOtter1

In Canada yes


[deleted]

Ukraine: those who watched Friends.


banana_berrie_

In South Africa: yes


JWT-80

Een aartappel, twee aartappels...


riverguava

From Orkney Snork Nie - Een Kabouter, twee kabouter (one gnome, two gnome - doesn't work that well in English)


banana_berrie_

I have forgotten the old ways


fable_27

We were taught to use 'krokodil' (crocodile) to count seconds.


A-Miniature-Cactus

I was taught one, *one thousand* two, *one thousand* three...


ComradeJohnS

this is the state trying to advertise itself as a useful time keeping function instead of the worst state in the US per the frequent “what’s the worst state” reddit polls lol


michalemabelle

If you say their name three times, they'll move up slightly in the rankings.


Snoo_84090

Only cuz Louisiana is sinking


CassCat

*West Virginia breathes a sigh of relief*


Potato_times_potato

I do. Sometimes I use hippopotamus if I'm trying to mix it up a bit.


Mr_Mango_III

How do you not break out in song?


that_star_wars_gut

I'm the hiphopapotamus, my lyrics are bottomless, I uh...um...*trails off*


omayersrule

I’m not a large water dwelling mammal, where did you get that preposterous hypothesis?


Former_Matter49

I grew up in Ohio saying hippopotamus.


naturallyeyesblind

MISSISSIPPILESSLY??


ladywood777

"How do you count to 5?" "1,2,3..." "Damn it!"


Mr_Mango_III

In Denmark we use 'crate of beer' (translated from: kasse øl)


DickVanGlorious

I do. Australian here.


nightwica

No. Do you say *Hódmezővásárhely* to estimate one second of time? There.


Cybotage

no we count Mississippilessly.


snookerpython

I'm irish and I do. I'm pretty sure there's an episode of the Young Offenders, an Irish comedy, where Connor does CPR with the Mississipi count. I think the classic thing is 'One, one thousand, two, one thousand...' and the Mississippi thing came over here with US films and TV shows.


Oknocando

Bee Gees Staying Alive is the perfect beat/timing for CPR... and a positive message :)


wayward_rivulets

I thought British people said Picadilly...


alphanumericusername

I'm from the US and it's always seemed 50/50 whether people use Mississippi or one thousand. IDK which one I'd even use if you told me to pick one.


zeeshadowfox

British here, in school I was taught to "Potato" to estimate one second. Though it's kind of been muddled by school yard rhymes in my mind and now whenever I try to use it i find myself thinking "one potato, two potato, three potato, four (pause). Five potato, six potato, seven potato, more."


IJustWantSomeReddit

Crocodile, but Dutch Een Krokodil, Twee Krokodil, Drie Krokodil I like that it was an animal!


Oddessuss

No.


FortuneWhereThoutBe

Hippopotamus is also used if somebody can't say Mississippi


Skvora

Apparently Ohio doesn't know what or where Mississippi is via other comments.


parisian_lurker

I'm French and I've been told to do so by my driving instructor. Before that I didn't know it was a thing.


cedriceent

Nope. I guess, any 4-syllable word would do the trick. Or, you do it like me, play the postman's 10-second minigame in Majora's Mask way too many times, and become a human stopwatch.


Atari-Dude

Do y'all actually use Mississippi in your head, when counting? I remember being like 5 or 6 and having perfect 1 second timing, so the only time I've ever said it is as a joke (namely the very long-hugging man from an episode of 30 Rock). Haha


carny666

I have used it that way since a child. I am Canadian. I do recall one kid used Mississauga but we laughed at him.


barefoot-bug-lover

Here in South Africa we say One Crocodile, Two Crocodile.


The-Go-Kid

I have done ever since I saw Raising Arizona.


ForeverPapa

In Germany we say: „Einindzwanzig, zweiundzwanzig…“ (21,22,…)


why_not_bud

Not in Denmark. We use cases of beer, at least that's how I learned it as a kid. "En kasse øl, to kasser øl, tre kasser øl" etc.


PointlessTrivia

I learned it as "One Jack Robinson". My wife was taught "One rhinoceros". Both in Queensland, Australia.


HurrySubstantial4890

I do, I think it's because I watched alot of Friends


Dilettante

Here in Ontario I often hear people say Mississauga (a city here).


voltaires_bitch

Just timed it. For me motherfucker works the best. An average of 1.03 seconds. 25 trials. Mississippi an average of 1.13 seconds 25 trials.


reluctanthardworker

Anywhere that speaks English and has been exposed to aggressive cultural bombardment from US television and movies, yes.


plazebology

I can vouch that non-english countries most certainly do not do this


fletch3059

I've heard it before but i was taught to add one thousand (so, one thousand and one, one thousand and two....) at school. My 6 year old uses elephants as a spacer.


humu-_-

One thousand in sweden, but ett tusen as its in swedish


onexy_

yes ive seen people in anime do that


wehavetogobackk

I'm Turkish and I always have, we don't have such estimation thing in Turkish, not any that I know of anyways.


magicturtle102

Scotland here and I've always said one potato, two potato...


simply_gamer32

We italians say "Monte bianco 1","Monte bianco 2.... Monte Bianco is the italian name of Mont Blanque, the tallest montain in europe


Markamanic

Dutch, I use 'Small Elephant' (Olifantje)


Lejonhufvud

European here. No.


-Purrfection-

Outside of the anglosphere, no


FiveWizz

Uk here. We do. But it's not super common these days.


anto_pty

Panama, no


Decent_Bedroom_6666

Sweden here, no we don't. We say "Ettusen-1" - "Ettusen-2" aso. meaning "onethousand 1". Works perfect :)


NomandicLife

I say hippocampus.


Oknocando

We are from Massachusetts. Our family (was probably weird) counted 1Massachusetts... 2Massachusetts...


Gwanosh

What's the alternative? Counting mississipilessly? That's how you become an 8


Macr0Penis

1 gonorrhoea, 2 gonorrhoea....