T O P

Husband has no romance

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Communicate.


bobadat

Half of this sub's issues can be resolved if the spouse just openly and effectively communicates.


Regular_Stay_1002

Have you asked him to do this with you? Have you told him that this is what you would like more of? I would suggest starting there if not.


sincosis

Walikum Salam wr, The most important aspect is communication, I would advise sharing what you feel like with him and perhaps also share all the sunnahs of the Holy Prophet PBUH. May Allah swt make things easier for you. JazakAllah khairan.


funiduni

What he said. Remember to approach the topic in a soft manner, like you’re advising him. It maybe from his background, maybe it’s not something his parents did or saw much of as he grew up.


nhuda001

The key is communication. To initiate, you can try: send him a steamy text, use your body language, dress up to his liking, take control (like step up n cuddle first or something), foreplay first so he gets it lol, setup your date, or join him while he is showering. You can also have him take some vitamins (zinc, l-arginine, vitamin b-3 for energy, magnesium to get in the mood). I hope this helps ❤️


sebastian_schutze

Do wives like taking showers together or is it varies from woman to woman ?


Ohheywhatehoh

I'd say it varies.


sebastian_schutze

Thats what i thought maybe they are shy. May Allah bless me with one thats likes. :D


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lossisoverrated

Do you know its in the authentic ahadith that the prophet ﷺ and aisha r.a bathed from the same vessel? So u can say its even sunnah and a way to encourage love between couples. Think twice before calling someone weirdo


helloandhehe123

There are thousands of authentic Hadiths that this individual could observe and ask Allah swt for…but this is what they just chose? On a public platform furthermore? Let’s have some shame and not misuse the beautiful Sunnah to justify such crass ideals on this app!


2022-1493-002

You need to talk to him and ask him to do these things. You can't expect someone who has never been married or been in a relationship suddenly to know how to behave or act towards their spouse. Half the posts here boil down to really just that point. You can't expect something you don't ask or communicate for and where they have 0 experience. You go from avoiding the opposite gender to suddenly married. But you don't suddenly also learn how to treat each other. And no spouse can read minds. Make your intentions and wants clear.


Ohheywhatehoh

Girl, same. Some men just aren't that... good at romance? Idk if they just not realize what their wife needs in a relationship or if they become complacent... but TELL HIM what you'd like. I know it's not ideal, because then you think... well, it should come from him he should know me by now... and yeah. He should? But it's not always that easy for them to show that soft side of themselves. I planned a whole date night with my husband and left our child with my parents for a few hours.. I actually had to tell him to put his phone away, I didn't want to compete with his phone. He got a little pissy but did it.


Agentflask

Really sorry tbh Yeah I agree some man don’t understand romance


1bn_Ahm3d786

Why are you asking strangers on the net? We're not your husband, talk to him about this please Insha Allah. Marriage can only last if you communicate


opinionmus_throwaway

I think she has talked to him but it would help us in the community understand how much or how the communication was phrased from OP to help.


1bn_Ahm3d786

If we assume she has, then maybe the OP needs to make it clear that her husband is denying her affection which isn't good in marriage. Perhaps he has other ways of showing love/affection, it might not be touch. Might be one of the other love languages. Allahu a'lam. May Allah make.it easy for her aameen


Friendly_Mountain360

Sister, I think you need to understand what exactly is his preferred love language. Take the time to consider the things that he actually does do before considering the things he doesn't.


SpiritedLemonTreee

The intention behind learning love languages is so that you can speak the language of your spouse, to your spouse. But you’re right talking about this book will be a good way for OP to bring it up so they can shift gears of communication and understand eachother


Unique-Cry-8758

Communication is important. Say what you feel, there people who truly love you but don’t know how to show affection so inform him.


ark_zero_one

Ask him to initiate , talk to him about your needs/attention. For now try to initiate by yourself in different ways.


opinionmus_throwaway

You don't have kids yet right? He isn't holding back cause he wants to set a "good example." Do you have issues with him reciprocating when you hug or kiss him or are you concerned he doesn't initiate the small things?


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opinionmus_throwaway

I didn't mean it like that. Let me edit it. Look at my post history and you'll see I'm a victim of this issue as well.


skinniks

I'll delete my comment.


opinionmus_throwaway

I would have left it up. I tripped you caught me and we need to hold each other accountable for when we're perpetuating incorrect ideas or practices.


traveller1976

Tell him your needs honestly. You have rights upon each other. Post's like this are full of good advice. https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=2408895906029613&id=1416983561887524


Inevitable_Knee_5071

Communication is important in a relationship. Communicate to him about your love language.


Traumatizedhuman_

Do a love language test and ask him to do it. Explain the concept behind the love language concept and referring to the results this would be your priorities in feeling loved.


away_from_work

Can i explain to sisters that men are not mind readers. We are not emotional radars, or able to pick up heat signals. If you feel a certain way Tell Us. Men are pretty dim witted sometimes especially because if you are practising you've never socialised or communicated with a female outside the family. It doesn't me you are devoid of learning or understanding what a women's needs are, but you need to communicate that to us clearly.


Lovedove25

Try watching romantic movies together.. and also to communicate. It might help . Goodluck