Well we cant really help you out if we don’t know what she’s asking you to do. Most things, and I emphasize most, are halal with your spouse. The big two exceptions being anal intercourse and intercourse during menstruation. What is your wife asking?
EDIT: the reason we asked is because you said you “think” some things she wants are questionable. Don’t just assume. If you don’t want to tell us that’s 100% fine. Just do your own research.
Exactly, we can't give proper advice without proper information.
It's like saying you want to eat some food when you're not sure whether it's halal, but refuse to say what the food is. Or visit a doctor because something hurts, but not say what body part, etc.
💯 OPs edit is so unnecessary
>Both of us were virgins however she is much more open to "experiment" in the bedroom
So what you were both virgins? What does that have to do with anything
> Some of the things she wants I think might be questionable and other things are outright haram
It's not about what you think. Don't assume and go figure out what's halal and haram, and go from there
I don't really know what you'd like from redditors since you've not specified anything.
There are a number of things that are haram, but pretty much most things are permissible.
Here are things that are definitely haram:
- anal sex
- sex during her menstruation
- using/watching pornography during sex
- using faeces or urine as part of sex
- advertising your sex life with others/including others
- consuming the fluid post-ejaculation
Things that are debated/disliked:
- talking to each other using derogatory words and insults
- oral sex (depends on the opinion you take).
- anything that disgraces or hurts a person e.g. BDSM
I'm sure there's more but I can't recall.
The best thing really is to talk to your partner. It may be that she wants something that's permissible to her but it doesn't match the opinion you take. If there is anything you're worried will lead to haram, you both need to sit down and set your boundaries before you are intimate again. This conversation must happen *outside* the bedroom. Make sure you both know and understand these limits, have a safe word if necessary and you both must respect these discussions. If it's broken, that's a huge violation of trust. If at any time you've tried something and change your mind, sit down again and talk it through. Safe, healthy and happy intimacy starts long before the bedroom.
One thing I will say though, assuming she may cheat because you can't or don't want to do all the things she wants, and bc she has a high libido, is messed up. It's a shame your mind would jump to that thought.
Interesting, I’m of the opinion that counts oral sex is foreplay. I’m not sure what BDSM is.
Using ropes, handcuffs, tying up etc. No ones getting hurt,nothing derogatory. At best like the person said its debated.
Bro that’s so weird wth
Nothing wrong with it. Its not haram and if a couple is both interested then so be it.
Edit: someone without the flair commented if it's violence. I don't know what I can or can't say without pushing it because this is a muslim sub. But no bdsm is not violent doesn't/shouldn't hurt. I mean there are forms where pain is involved but even then it is tolerable and not hurting.
As long as both people are into it there’s nothing wrong with it.
From how you describe it your wife has no issue committing sin so it's very possible she'll cheat on you. All you can do is guide her to only seek out what's halal in all aspects of life.