T O P
Machetegun_

I love how Seattle fans dwarf every other clubs supporters in this thread, even the two sides who played in this game lol


Cold_Fog

Makes me think there's really not much going on in Seattle.


DaneldorTaureran

normally it rains gently here, yesterday it was raining hard as fuck. got drenched at the match


Machetegun_

Small club mentality indeed


Cold_Fog

Not what I meant, but go on.


ItsDefDamule

This is worst than the 2019 season. That’s saying something


Whole_Bench_2972

Does anyone have a link to all of the songs that were played during this game?


wisdomsword

Should upload the highlight to Pornhub.


kermitthebeast

Woah woah woah, still not as bad as Brazil


n3verender

This was a fun match to be at the park for!


Vladimir_Putins_Cock

Yeah that was awesome! [There was a nice little pile of log pieces](https://imgur.com/a/V8I4PT0)


silk35

Welcome to the club!


kermitthebeast

I don't know why they're down voting you. Seven goals is a Portland record for a single game. Same as Seattle


goatvaro_goatrata

Everything is about seattle 🙄


kermitthebeast

Good job Portland, that was a wild game


Medala_

This is not a thread of honor


TMOP_Halloween

[MLS Communications:](https://twitter.com/MLS_PR/status/1525694165862031360?s=20&t=IjsVrsgMPEC2A_dMLYPcFw) Behind goals from five different players tonight, the Portland Timbers set a club record with seven goals scored, including a pair of braces from Sebastián Blanco and Nathan Fogaça. The Timbers have scored at least six goals on four separate occasions since the start of the 2020 season. LETS GOOO


LAFCPEREZ

WTF HAPPENED HERE


runnerd6

Uhh I can explain


YbstagYaj

There is too much. Let me sum up.


qu33gqu3g

More goals in this game than in all our other home games combined lol


peacefinder

And our goal difference on the season is all the way up to… zero. ¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯


Skeptical_Yoshi

So does the season start now?


lifeisacamino

Works for me


cloudedsky

What can I say, I like watching the ball go into the goal. This was very entertaining!


AlloysiusMendenhall

This was fun. I enjoyed it. We should do it again sometime.


Vladimir_Putins_Cock

Could you imagine doing this to Seattle?


ChurchillDownz

I did not. :(


theshate

If it helps peter get fired I'm all for it. Gg timbers


SteveBartmanIncident

Really? That's like firing Phil Jackson because Michael Jordan got hurt.


TraptNSuit

Who is Jordan here for you and please show me when that guy got a trophy


tcalvin93

Hard disagree


AlloysiusMendenhall

What the fuck is your coach doing? Actively sabotaging the team?


BoomaMasta

I saw [a tweet joking that he's starting Shelton to intentionally tank the team to prove a point.](https://twitter.com/downthebyline/status/1525696459877896193?t=_T_-JLXF79SPl0l9V6E69g&s=19)


tcalvin93

He’s stubborn and thinks it’s 2013. Playing 35 year olds far too many minutes. He’s also our GM so he only signs his guys. Our academy is shit. It’s not looking good.


SonAskani

Even after the Dallas game, I decided to skip watching tonight. Decision definitely justified. What an embarrassment.


SteveBartmanIncident

Seba's English has really come a long way pretty quickly.


strikefromdistance

Was just thinking the same thing!


SteveBartmanIncident

The clean Th on "think", the use of "of course" and "deserve" in the flow of easy speech. You can really tell he's worked very hard at it


TMOP_Halloween

YOU CAN FALSELY CALL IT A BASEBALL FIELD AFTER THIS CUZ THAT WAS A BASEBALL SCORE - 7 -2 MFS


AlphaLevelFall

Back to civic stadium’s roots


Hailfire9

Football? A TD, PAT, and Safety? I mean, I guess...


AlphaLevelFall

Fair enough, I was thinking of the beavers, but that too.


KejsarePDX

The Oregon State Beavers football team? They played there too a few times between 1926 and 1933.


AlphaLevelFall

I had meant the Portland Beavers baseball team, I forgot about OSU. They played there different times through the stadiums history most recently being in the 80’s


chzformymac

No love for the Portland Rockies?


Skeptical_Yoshi

Or the Mavricks?


KejsarePDX

I knew what you were saying. Made a joke about the missing qualifier of city/school. There were different iterations of the Portland Beavers. Pacific Coast League, Triple A, Double A Single A, and Independent for many years between 1956 and 2010 in that stadium. The number of years without a baseball team since 1926 there than with one is about to be a minority. (I counted 51 years with baseball there, versus 45 without)


TMOP_Halloween

Beavers actually playing in Providence a game in 2022 lol


AlphaLevelFall

I meant the Portland Beavers baseball team, but I don’t know how I didn’t know about the OSU game


TMOP_Halloween

Yeah they're playing Montana State there in September 2022. Should be a good game


rzle

GG SKC, really hope both our teams figure their shit out soon. So strange to see these two clubs buried in the standings. What a fun night this was for Timbers fans. Hopefully it goes a long way to boosting confidence and helping the team find form.


gecampbell

That was very entertaining


strikefromdistance

“That’s a lot of wood.” That’s what she said, Jake, that’s what she said.


TMOP_Halloween

What a fucking match LMFAO wow was that a goddamn blast! GG


Inner-Conclusion

Ok, Nathan has a great smile.


runnerd6

Him and Rasmussen... Timbers should make a dreamy calendar.


ShitJuggler

Lost in the madness but Rasmussen was great tonight.


jboarei

He was fine. Let's not throw great around. His passing wasn't good on any ball that had air under it. He was asleep on a goal.


RCTID1975

Wasn't that second goal him falling asleep?


ShitJuggler

Agree 100 percent. Young kid that needs to learn to not switch off. But on balance he was very good.


RCTID1975

Agreed. I like him and am happy to see him getting minutes


SteveBartmanIncident

Yeah. I thought he was poor defensively and okay going forward.


Hailfire9

Poor defensively? In the run of play he kept Russell shut down all night. One cross did him dirty and even that felt like a rookie, "if he's offside I don't have to play it" mistake where Russell was in fact not offside


Skeptical_Yoshi

Also like, the whole team was still kinda celebrating


peacefinder

Getting burned by Russell on the end line is practically a rite of passage


heretrythiscoffee

Yes he was!


BoomaMasta

This should be a fun post-game presser from Peter...


417SKCFAN

Here’s the fucked part. SKC 58.3% possession and 11 shots PTFC 41.7% possession and 11 shots PTFC 8 shots on target, 7 found the net


elitron

that's what happens when you're up by a few goals and you can create really high quality chances on the counter


ElectJimLahey

Good lord, that might be the most clinical performance I've ever seen


runnerd6

We scored as many goals in this game as the previous 10 (including Open Cup)


buttcabbge

Well, GG Portland.


tcalvin93

I’m tired and sad. I’m at a loss for how to describe how bad this team is. Fire Vermes


big-shotFaker

Alright Pete, who ya gonna throw under the bus tonight?


rzle

He can always borrow a page from Bob Bradley and blame the turf.


dawson33944

It’s the refs fault. But in reality. Start Tzinos and Vujnovic and get rid of Shelton and Espinoza


scorcherdarkly

Shelton, sure. Espinoza got subbed at half so I'm not sure what blame he holds for this fiasco.


theshate

Flush them.


Auen_Draco16

The ref sucked but GG's SKC.


WislaHD

Very Portland-esque to score 7 goals in a game and still no hat trick


peacefinder

50 braces, 0 hat tricks


RCTID1975

I've said this before, but that's actually a good thing. I'd rather have 5 people score goals than 1 guy score 7. I'd love to see a hat trick, but most players scoring is wonderful


petriebrews

BECAUSE GIO SUBBED THEM OUT LIKE THE COCK THAT HE IS.


AlphaLevelFall

Better to get the subs solid time than try to run it up with Seba, though I wouldn’t have minded if Fogaça stayed in


beepartz

On one hand that's true, but it was also the perfect low-stakes opportunity to get some minutes for Tega Ikoba.


gecampbell

GG Portland. SKC, not so much


shunna75

It's fucking 7-2??? HOLY SHIT.


417SKCFAN

SKC beat Montreal 7-1 in 2019 at home early, then missed the playoffs, not sure what my point is, fuck.


runnerd6

Your point is 2022 SKC is as bad as 2019 Montreal.


417SKCFAN

Pretty sure we’re worse.


amuller72

Mercy Rule should have been used at half time. I'm embarrassed to be a Sporting Kansas City fan right now. Disgraceful


heretrythiscoffee

It was 1-0 at half


Jonny_Qball

The first half was only 1-0. Shit hit the fan in the 2nd half.


amuller72

I've seen enough SKC games this year to know that once we concede a goal, it's over.


Thecrimsongiant

It was 1-0 at half…


amuller72

With this team, that's all it needed to be.


Thecrimsongiant

Y’all will find your way back, I imagine seeing SKC mid to top of the field by the end of the year.


amuller72

I wish I had your confidence. I think this is the beginning of a long and painful rebuild.


darthvenom

We back


childishbambiino

Gg Portland


ShitJuggler

Timber Joey ran out of gas.


______-_----_---___-

Fourteen logs


strikefromdistance

14?


______-_----_---___-

Isn't it one for the team and one for the player?


strikefromdistance

One slice per goal and then usually a slice for a clean sheet.


______-_----_---___-

Oh weird, I'm not sure why I'm remembering it wrong. Maybe it was an Outdoor School thing...Lol


tateand99

If SKC was playing literally any team other than Portland I’d be very happy right now


fallingbehind

Sorry to see you unhappy 😂


Jonny_Qball

Chainsaw guy is going to need a fresh log at this rate


KejsarePDX

Usually do go through more than one log a season.


Dangerous--D

I think the C in SKC stands for Cincinnati, which is why they are so bad this season. And because there can be only one bad Cincinnati in the league per season, the other Cincinnati is doing great.


417SKCFAN

And somehow (4 fewer games played) Seattle is still below us.


Dangerous--D

If we don't win at least 1 of our next 2, that's when I'll start to worry. As long as we pick our form up pronto, we still have a reasonable shot at starting the playoffs at home. It'll be interesting to see the team try to succeed without JP, though, I'm far more worried about that than our lack of points. He has been our most important player since he set foot in Seattle.


417SKCFAN

I’m sure Seattle will, but weird shit kept happening to SKC after an even shorter CCL run in 19, injuries and fixture congestion were brutal and they never caught up.


Dangerous--D

Yeah I'm not ruling out that possibility, but we're in good enough shape at this point that I don't think we'll end up quite that bad.


gecampbell

🤔


FountainCityFC

LOL


Dangerous--D

I just don't think it is coincidence that you guys stole their form from previous seasons, there are larger forces at work.


gottahavemyPOPPs

Wouldn’t be surprised if we also lose 4/5-0 to Colorado Wednesday


BoomaMasta

At this point, it's a definite possibility.


peacefinder

Okay, if I ever had imagined scoring 7 in one game, I certainly would not have imagined putting 7 past Tim fuckin’ Melia


theshate

Well this is a nice comment and gave me some solice. Gg. Maybe in a few years we can be competitive again...


Pale-Calligrapher974

To be fair though to tim, none of the 7 goals have been his fault really. Maybe the 6th one he maybe could’ve saved but it was a hard shot


elitron

Nah he got hung out to dry. Not on him at all


peacefinder

That’s the only way it could ever have happened


rzle

Timber Joey really earning his paycheck tonight.


RipCityRevival

Melia on suicide watch


asaharyev

more like homicide none that i saw were on him, i'm sure he's mad as hell at his back line


tcalvin93

Same


TMOP_Halloween

I CANT BELIEVE IT SOMEONE FROM OUR SUBREDDIT PUT A CURSE ON KANSAS CITY AND THEN WE SCORED 7 GOALS AGAINST THEM ???? WTFFFF


rzle

It took me way too long to figure out what the hell that post was. When I clicked on it I half expected it to be some weird tweet SKC had put out to try to troll us.


UnlikelyDoughnut1506

Magic is real!


asaharyev

lol, i went to the bathroom and grabbed a beer and missed two more


ShitJuggler

You store your beer in the bathroom?


petriebrews

That's the best spot to hide your cheese from the wife!


asaharyev

yeah, why, where do you keep yours?


petriebrews

Lmao I'm so sorry skc fans. You were right. I was wrong. You are smart. I am dumb. You are good looking. I am not attractive.


gottahavemyPOPPs

Thank god someone said it


big-shotFaker

Ok. As long as you're willing to admit it.


WislaHD

Ouff. Was here, watching this.


Dangerous--D

Damn, Portland now has scored more goals in a game than we have at Providence Park :'(


scuac

It's a challenge I tell ya


danhig

go away


Dangerous--D

Only if you promise to visit


big-shotFaker

We've only scored 10 on the season I think.


ItzDp

THIS IS A JOKE. MY FRIEND JUST KEEPS LIVE BETTING GOALS AND WON ALMOST A GRAND. IT JUST WONT STOP WTF


twat_cools

Almost took the under 4.5 goals on my parley 🥹


ItzDp

I took clean sheet for the timbers, lol. thats definitely worse though


rzle

MLS After Dark >>>>>>>>>> Pac 12 After Dark.


fallingbehind

Great game for us , but what the fuck is wrong with VanRankin? He’s such a good defender but we can’t afford to put him on the pitch. Gio would be out of his mind to put him out again.


elitron

Unfortunately, it was clear from the whole game apart from those 2 yellows that he is, play by play, much better than Bonilla. But then again that's not worth it if he won't stop committing the same ridiculous errors


fallingbehind

It’s so insane. He’s our best right back. Just don’t get reds. It’s crazy.


darthvenom

I appreciate that he doesn't switch off on runs to the back post or set pieces, like basically every other right back we've ever had has done Other than that... not great


radddchaddd

Trying to make up for so many games with no goals.


about831

You get a goal and you get a goal! Everyone gets a goal!!!


thelowandtobask

https://imgur.com/sFRnFrZ


PompeiiLegion

Just throwing this out there as a meme monday idea since I’ll probably forget… But can someone make a meme out of those satellite photos of the DR-Haiti border and deforestation and make a joke at our expense?


mocheeze

> DR-Haiti border [I gotchu, fam.](https://imgur.com/FQIYj6t) You get to post it since it's your brain-child. :)


PompeiiLegion

You’re a gentleman and a scholar.


TMOP_Halloween

7 GOALS 7 GOALS THATS OUR MLS RECORD!!


childishbambiino

Wow has 7 ever got past Melia? I think that’s a first for sure


CreeperDude17

Nut


big-shotFaker

7 more nails in Peter Vermeses coffin.


PlebBot69

That coffin is far from being buried:/


Squirrels_Gone_Wild

Can we move up our game against skc?


Slinger17

LET IT RAIN LET IT POUR


PDXGinger

LET THE PORTLAND TIMBERS SCORE


AlphaLevelFall

Na na na na na na na na na


murty_the_bearded

Hahah what a crazy game, top to bottom


Inner-Conclusion

This might get Vermes fired.


gottahavemyPOPPs

We could lose the rest of the games and he wouldn’t get fired.


BoomaMasta

It won't. We'll have not win between now and our next Open Cup match - which we'll also have to lose - before it's even discussed.


miguisystem

Nope, he has the full backing of the Cauldron and Front Office. Cauldron honchos won't let you say anything negative about him.


PlebBot69

Not as long has he has his "two DPs are injured" excuse


FountainCityFC

Doubt it.


ShitJuggler

Well, fuck me. Seven goals is impressive and I don’t care who you are.


sc4l4r

SE7EN


murty_the_bearded

What’s on the box?


WEHAVEBETTERBBQ

[https://i.imgur.com/mJms970.gif](https://i.imgur.com/mJms970.gif)


UnlikelyDoughnut1506

!!!


Hailfire9

Just lay him *down*, Santi


gecampbell

Fuck me, that was beautiful


ElectJimLahey

7!!! HOW IS THIS HAPPENING


xB_A_Mx

WE DID ITTT!!!!!


Auen_Draco16

Club record, let's go!


ciphershort

WOOOOOOOOOOW


heretrythiscoffee

Holy fuck! 7 goals!! Glad to see Moreno finally get one.


about831

A new club record ⚡️💫👑


CheapAssistance

This shit is just too funny lmao


big-shotFaker

It's sad because it was inevitable. Will anything change?


strikefromdistance

SEVEN GOALS


overscore_

GG Portland. I hope to one day visit Providence Park because it looks and sounds fantastic.


Auen_Draco16

Get out of the way ref


tcalvin93

Yikes, guys. We fuckin STINK


rzle

Loria is one of those players who arrived in Portland as a highly touted youngster and it just hasn't really worked out. Not saying he's been a Conechney level failure, far from it, but he hasn't exactly lit the world on fire. Happy for him to get the goal.


RCTID1975

He's just not getting minutes, and I think it's a crime. Him and Moreno bossed RSL in the WCF, and I think Loria should've started MLS cup with Blanco a late sub


petriebrews

Loria is so off and on though, and I'm not sure that changes with consistent minutes.


sounders1974

Two more and we can break out the "8-2 be them" jokes