Drunk old guy jumps the curb and face plants the road after ignoring cries to not drink and drive (r/shortlclips)

Drunk old guy jumps the curb and face plants the road after ignoring cries to not drink and drive (r/shortlclips)

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RIP grandpa. At least he died in a golf cart doing what he loved.


Being an asshole.


A gaping asshole.


***Hole in one*** >!six feet under!<


>!6 foot!< *in* ( ͡ ͡° ͜つ ͡͡° )


I've never done it underground but ok ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


A-hole in one


Flashbacks to goatse...


True story… I once was accidentally added to Spanish speaking evangelical churches email list. There were about 20 people on the list and I kept getting bombarded with email chains and replies to the chain. I asked politely to be removed from the email chain several times and my emails began to get increasingly direct. I finally sent the chain the OG goatse pic. The replies were hilarious. They thought I was a church member that had my name and similar email address and they had to figure out I wasn’t him and then disbanded the email chain all together. After a day I never received a message from them again.


Me: "OG Goatse pic? What's that?" Also me: (scrubbing my eyeballs with a stiff brush and clorox) "Why? Why did I go there?"


that's a bit of a cultural touchstone for older millennials, it's like getting rick rolled but soul wounding


Holy fuck that's apt


Damn, all of a sudden I was transported back to my school days innocently perusing the internet... until that fateful afternoon....


Your internet history lesson won't be complete until you also learn about Tubgirl.


Now go see 1 guy 1 jar.


Damn. Poor Charming-Set-7261 probably had a shit load of explaining to do.


Lemon party time


[It wouldn’t be a lemon party without…](https://youtu.be/v-bvHlb2Fe8)


I am disappointed with myself. A decade or so ago, I would have had that ASCII art at the ready. But now, alas! Sic transit gloria mundi.




RIP His name was Kirk Johnson and he passed away after an injury sustained while inserting a volleyball in his rectal cavity went septic. His giant gaping meme on an asshole will be missed and feared for years to come!


You could drive a golf cart in there.


Ok ms frizzle


She knows how to get it in.


That's the thing, often people who were like that when they were younger get worse, not better, as they age.


The entitled get entitledier


I dispute your characterization of him Evidence: "as much of a dick as he's been..." Case closed


Some say he is still there, laying face down to this very day


Is this the Villages?


Considering there is mountains in the background, no.


Looks like Palm Springs to me.


Half of suburban Florida is the Villages.


Only mountains in Florida are the landfills tho


DUI is probably why he now drives a cart


In Colorado I know you can get a dui on anything other than you're own walking feet. This includes but is not limited to horse back riding, skate boarding, razor scooters and even on skis. There was a kid who got one riding roller blades through the dorm hallways.


As a teenager my friend got a dui while driving a car. A few months later he was leaving a party and got a DUI for going home on a bicycle


I'd be so mad if I got one on a bicycle, when I was younger and lived in pheonix I used to choose to ride my bike if I knew I'd be drinking, bonus after a full night of drinking with my friends I'd have to ride ten miles home and for whatever reason I'd wake up the next day without even the slightest hangover. It was, what I assumed, a win-win but apparently I was breaking the law trying to be responsible.


If you're drunk and are in your car planning to sleep it off you HAVE to hide your keys outside of the car and claim no knowledge to where they are If a cop asks. If you have accessibility to drive while intoxicated they can still pin a dui on you. Our system is fucked. There is no rehab, it's pay us everything we say and maybe you learned your lesson. If not see you on strike 2.


Fr who would punish someone for responsibly drinking?? Like the worst they could do is kill themselves which is why the law is in place most likely


Irresponsible bike riding is dangerous on roads. If someone is drunk riding a bike in the street they can easily cause accident or hit someone on a sidewalk.


This is pretty rampant in my town. Drunk driving golf carts is a hobby of the older timers around me.


"You know back in my day we could drink and drive all we wanted and if we got caught the cops would just drive us home and tell us to sleep it off."


Uhg I hate how accurate this is. My dad is 75 and apparently they used to drink in Alberta until around closing then drive back to BC and party more. He thinks it's hilarious, and it would be if they had a sober driver.


This was still a popular pastime in the Midwest as recent as the late 90s. Minus the drinking in a bar first. Just grab a couple friends, some beers, and drive around aimlessly on the dirt roads. When I was a kid I would hand my father beers through back glass of the truck (me riding in the back) while we drove down to the lake.


"roading" "booze cruise" Don't worry, it's still popular in my area of the Midwest


Big time. Throw in some weed and Metallica and you’ve got yourself an evening


Surprisingly in my small town, most people that drank, didn't smoke and vice versa


Had lots of friends that did both at parties in the 2000s. Lots of fun times were had in the Cadillac my grandparents let me borrow as my first car.


> Big time. Throw in some weed and Metallica and you’ve got yourself an evening Oh god, I can hear it from here. It's just like 1991 all over again. Eeeexit light! Eeeenter night! Nope. Nope. Nopenopenope. Nope. This is not the be-all, end-all. And imma gonna detox amongst the living. State of mind: Euphoria.


I wonder if it still is. Seems like kids now are much more responsible about this stuff. Plus, not many of the "you boys don't cause no trouble" cops. At least around my little slice of nowhere where I grew up.


Booze cruising, yes. The driver drinking as well, not so much. But taking turns driving 6 of your buddies around while they get wasted is a good ass time, even if its still technically illegal(open liquor and whatnot)


There are 11 states where open container laws don't apply. Weirdly, North Carolina, home of Brew Thru the drive thru liquor store, does have them.Personally, I understand how it could discourage drunk driving as a law, but also morally if the driver is fully sober I don't see the harm so it kind of bugs me.


As a 22 year old who goes out drinking every weekend, I would say no. I would say about 90% of people my age that I know personally drink and drive themselves or are completely fine with others doing so




Oh shit yeah. I'm surprised I'm even alive. Nothing like calling your buddy and saying "thanks for driving me home last night" and have him say "um I thought you drove ME home". The morning walk around the car routine was real, just making sure everything was where it was supposed to be. The idiocy level was off the charts.


There is no Uber or lyft is town's under 2k where I'm from.




That is scary as hell.


We used to drive around shooting fireworks at people's houses while my friend's Dad got more and more drunk. This was usually at 2-3 am. He was an adult, we were 12, so it all seemed like a grand old time!


It’s still popular here in Chicago, not just a 90s thing.


Jesus in Chicago? We were doing it about 15 years ago in bumfuck North Dakota. I can barely drive completely sober in Chicago.


My parents did this when I was growing up and I'm 26, so this was like 2008. We lived out in Buttfuck, Kansas, and they'd have a cooler in their car. They never got ripshit drunk or drove fast but still looking back, that's a yikes from me dawg My mom brought it up last year and she was like yeah we legit didn't even think about it at the time but now that I do, fucking OOF, that was NOT smart


its a popular pastime in the midwest right now lol


Also back then the legal limit was much higher. ~ 0.16 %


Holy shit I had no idea. My friend has one of those novelty breathalyzers (which, granted, might not be completely accurate), and I've used it when I'm a solid four or five drinks in, well past the point where I'd ever consider driving, and got like an 0.11. I think maybe once or twice I managed to get up to 0.16 or 0.17, but that was while we were all competing for a high score. Anyone who got busted for drunk driving back in the day must have been absolutely shittered.


Yeah we can thank MADD for the switch. The .16 was as recent as the 90’s https://kpattorney.com/why-how-08-become-legal-bac-limit/


My 60+ friend once told me how they would go on road trips and he would always have an open beer in the cup holder.


I'm 61, and it was legal to drive with an open container when I was a teenager, and the drinking age was 18 to boot. I drank and drove all the time. My old truck, El Camino, and Trans Am had bottles and cans all over the place back in the day. It became illegal in Texas in 2001. It's still legal to have an open container in a boat however, as long as you don't overdo it. I've never had a DWI/DUI, and I really don't even drink much at all any more. I feel lucky to have made it this far so I'm laying low :-)


It's one of the things that scared me and stopped me from riding motorcycles like I used to in the PNW when I moved to Texas. I used to put down 10,000 miles on a motorcycle easily in a year, riding and camping. There were still a lot of older folks that referred to Lone Star Light as "road beer" or "road soda", like my ex-girlfriend's dad, and he had no problems with driving on both sides of the road out in the hills around Canyon Lake sober or not. I could just imagine me coming around a blind turn to their house and finding him in my lane in his big old diesel Ford.


That's my neck of the woods, here around San Antonio. Speaking of Lone Star we used to buy cases of it for a few bucks each back then, we drank the hell out of it. As far as bikes go I've only had a dirt bike, a long time ago, a Honda CR250M Elsinore. I was a mad man on it, but I never took up road bikes because of the lack of protection while riding and being vulnerable to other people's screw ups. I knew I would kill myself, or get killed. Did you stick around or head back to the PNW? It sure is beautiful up that way. San Antonio is too freakin' hot, I like it colder, and would love to move, but this is where my family is, sigh.




That's so fucked. Sounds like something straight out of F is for Family.


Pretty much sums up our parent's entire generation- "It's my life, fuck everyone else."




I almost got run over at an intersection yesterday. I saw I had green light so I started crossing, and a car came around the corner and braked really hard and I felt something in my stomach and looked at the driver. All I saw was the phone she held in her hand as she used the same hand to waved an apology...


As a pedestrian/boarder/cyclist, there are so many people who whip out their phone at a light or stop sign and then put it away AFTER THEY HAVE CROSSED THE INTERSECTION. It's the most dangerous place people! I know the thought process is "Oh, Ill just use it while im stopped.... eh.... I mean, Ill just finish this text as I start driving, im going slow its okay!"


This sums up stories my dads old friends would tell me when I became a teenager. Fucking assholes the lot of them.


I remember being ten years old and a cop asking me if I knew how to drive, 'cause my dad was literally passed out behind the wheel. And you know what? I drove that big-ass Mercury Marquis right on home without any issues. Granted, I was going like 15mph, and I had a police escort ahead of me. But we made it.


Me and some friends got pulled over once with several open containers and a cooler full of beer. We were all 16-17 years old. The deputy decided our punishment was to make us pour out every beer on the side of the road and threatening to call our parents if he ever caught us again. We actually bitched to him about how unfair it was while we emptied them. The 90s were a trip. Nowadays, a DUI can straight up ruin you. Driving after a beer or two is in no way worth it anymore.


My parents told a story about getting hit (minor collision) by a drunk driver (this was 40-50 years ago) and the police officer who responded knew him (drunk driver) by name and gave him a ride home. Shit was different back then.


Yeah and not in a good way. This is the context they compare today's young people with when they call them entitled and soft.


Oh yeah, you know, just have a pot of black coffee when you're done drinking and you can stay awake while you drive.


Weird name for cocaine


... my dad using coffee as a euphemism for cocaine makes those stories make a lot more sense, actually...


An entire generation who grew up on lead paint and gasoline fumes normalized functional alcoholism and drinking and driving. Thanks fam.


I grew up in rural Northeast Louisiana, and back in the 70's, people would drive around with an ice chest full of beer, and drink and drive all day. Open container - no problem! To this day, Louisiana still has drive-thru daiquiri stores!


But at least they put a piece of tape over the straw so it's a "closed container".../s


My father ran the Sheriff off the road twice in one day, while drunk driving on the wrong side of the road. While underaged. My father was just griped out and told to stop being an idiot after the sheriff caught him the second time it happened, and that was it The 70's were a different time man, especially in small rural areas where everyone knows everyone and the population of the town is under 150 and everyone goes to the same church and highschool etc.


Shit an old friend of mine legit crashed his car, but a tow driver got there before anyone called the cops. I don't know if the tow driver was like it isn't my business or my friend sobered while waiting. Fuck DUI the love of my life was hit and her brain separated even though she looked fine. She died days later after going into a coma. My dad also died by driving drunk and the second crash killed him. When I saw what tree killed him I was like it is so small. My uncle said "Well. Trees don't move." I figured there would be damage. Both died a five minutes from home.


Everyone in my neighborhood loves to pile every single family member and pet they have on an unlit dark-colored golf cart and drive around at dusk. I live in a woodsy 'hood and we don't have many streetlights, so it's only a matter of time before one of them gets plowed into and their 4 kids under 8 years old and two dogs become a very unpleasant news story. At least the cops finally cracked down on the 8 year olds driving themselves around.


It was coming over blind hill and finding an Amish buggy in the lane that always gave me the shivers.


These golf carts give me flashbacks to central PA. I was up there for work, and made the mistake of taking a scenic drive through the central part of the state. It was then I learned that rush hour applies to the Amish as well. 5 p.m. and they were all out on the roads. Blind hills, exactly like you said.


I came around a totally blind right hand turn with a 45mph speed limit to see 2 women walking 4 dogs straight in the middle of the road walking into oncoming traffic. If someone was in the oncoming lane Id have easily nailed them.


The dumb rednecks around me put their 2/3/4 kids on one ATV without even shoes and send them out riding. Do you know what an old rusty barbwire fence does when you ride through it on an ATV? It cuts the rider's heads off. So we've had a number of beheaded kids in my area.


This happened to a classmate of mine in 6th grade. Barbwire cut his head off but caught him at the cheeks so it left his lower jaw...


Jesus Christ


Oh man... when I was a teenager I was driving a four-wheeler with a girl holding on out in the woods. The ATV's hand breaks didn't work, only the foot break, which is more of an emergency break I think. You see where this is going.. I let her drive for a bit and we were cruising along when we see a property line denoted by a steel wire rope hanging taunt between 2 trees. Well she drove us right at it, and that shit hit her right in the neck, and me behind her in the teeth. Knocked us both clean off. Honestly I don't have a clue how long we laid there before getting up. Left a WICKED bruise on her neck the next day, like somebody 2-handed choked her til she passed out. Chipped my front teeth. ATV kept going and crashed into a tree and fucked up the steering. I shudder to think if that was barbed wire instead.


god i hate SO MUCH the weird neighborhoods in certain suburbs or weird kind of remote developments where everybody in the area all has golf carts for just like... getting around their little mini-town. not because I hate the concept, but because it's always full of fucking moron kids whose parents should not be allowing them to drive around unsupervised. it's like a sense of complacency sinks in and suddenly nobody exercises any common sense.. and then you get what you described- the 8 year olds in like a swimsuit and no shoes just roving all over in golf carts, driving on sidewalks, creating dangerous road conditions for actual cars, etc...


Ours have started buying their kids golf carts for just that reason. With sound systems.


jesus christ... imagine the quantity of benzo's you'd have to be abusing to live in a neighborhood like that and not constantly be agitated about the noise from a bunch of 8-12 year olds flying around in golf carts blasting whatever horrible viral youtube video/song at max volume on their mobile sound systems. god i feel old... but that shit really IS absurd. I'm 28.




Florida suburbs checking in. It's become a huge thing in the neighborhoods around where I live in the last year. The street lights are few and far between and rarely do the golf carts have any type of reflectors on them. At first I tried to think of it as "They look like they're having fun. What harm are they doing?", now it's starting to become a little annoying


Won't somebody think of the flowers!


They are screaming out in pain!


I will make you understand the flowers’ rage.


*Poison Ivy has entered the chat*


Palm Springs? Sun City? The mountains say this ain't Florida


Looks like Palm Springs or La Quinta


Can confirm, la Quinta Cove 👍 he's leaving a liquor store btw


La Quinta Liquor, 78025 Avenida La Fonda, La Quinta, CA 92253 Confirmed using google streetview


Man that was a great lil virtual trip to SoCal. Even saw the flowers he ran over. Thanks!


Drunk old white dudes and coachella valley. Name a better duo.


The Villages and STDs.


The Villages and helping determine the direction America will go for the next four years


Old Town La Quinta. In front of stuffed pizza


Fun fact: Florida has the lowest high point of all fifty states. I've been there, you'd miss it if it didn't have signs and a monument.


Arizona man... we’re the west coast Florida. Actually I think this is California.


Great selfie smile at the end. I feel worse for the flowerbed than I do for that man.


That counts as property damage too.


Plant abuse. 🌱


The Villages.....Florida's friendliest home townnnnnn


Definitely not Florida. Looks like Arizona.


I was going to say, Florida is not known for its mountains... I'd guess Sun City or somewhere else in the west Valley.


The only mountain in Florida is Space Mountain


And Big Thunder Mountain and Expedition Everest, sir!


We also have landfills!


Back in Nov. last year when the election was going on, the street was split in two; one gent. on the trump side doing a Hitler salute and shouting 'white power!' As a Floridian, it's a "friendly" town full of swingers, lmao.


Haha the *”what a dumbass”* smile is what had me giggling. That would’ve been my reaction.


Normally I hate people adding themselves into things but that was just perfect


Reminded me of [the fire girl.](https://static01.nyt.com/images/2021/04/30/multimedia/30xp-meme/29xp-meme-mobileMasterAt3x-v3.jpg)


those flowers looked like they handled it ok actually lol


"Yep, same shit as always" -the flowers


"I'm too old to have self-control and common decency!"






"What's my name? Will you take me home?"


Uncle Leo? Jerry!! Hallo!!




I got his keys!!!


I got his hat!


Hey did that guy steal his wallet? I think he stole that guy's wallet.


My wallets gone!!


Great Scott!


Fun fact, in the credits and Imdb, this character’s name is “CPR Kid”


I got his teeth!


I'll get his wallet


I got his dignity


"I got his draws!" "Oooh, i got a riing!"


I got his nose.


Now we need r/idiotsincarts


It should include these, side by sides and mobility scooters. Remember the dude that went down the elevator shaft? Poster child.


I love the zoom into the poor flowers that he killed in cold blood.


The foresight in the videography is delightful


Definitely Coachella Valley! Classic Rancho Mirage behavior lol


If Billy Madison never met Veronica Von


That Veronica Vaughn is one piece of ace!


I would know from firsthand experience


No you don't




I'll turn this damn bus around....


That'll end your **precious** little field trip pretty damn quick, eh?


Mr Lahey's long lost twin brother


The shits hawks are circling again Randy. Look, they killed all the flowers!...


That's still a DUI, buddy. Plus a crash resulted and damage done to the flowers. Please tell me someone called the cops.


I'd hope someone called 911 to get an ambulance as well, old person smacking their head on the concrete might not end well. Get him his DUI and get him to the hospital.


They are calling for it in the video


Yeah it sounds like it from the audio. Sounds and looks like he's done this before too, you can briefly hear someone say something about "not getting involved again". That and the fact that one guy took the keys out and then immediately backed off and put his hands up leads me to believe dude has done this and then screamed at people for getting in his way.


Which would also explain why they just kinda let it play out. About the third time you just say "ok old man let's roll those concussion dice then I guess"


Nah dawg, call amber lamps


He leakin’


Welcome to La Quinta, California's The Villages, would you like an STD to go along with your wrecked cart?


I believe this is Palm Springs/La Quinta...pretty much The Villages of Southern California.


From Wikipedia: >La Quinta (Spanish for "the fifth") Stunning how accurate that is.


Jesus christ this is exactly my 90 year old grandfather. You can't tell him shit. He's got a golf cart and a vehicle and somehow still has a driver's license. He drinks constantly and it messes with some drugs he takes for pain and other stuff. I'm worried he's going to kill someone.


Call his doctor. Tell him about your worries. He could ask the state to revoke his license.


We have done that. South Carolina is a difficult place to revoke privileges.


I’m sorry. Maybe he’ll do what my sister did. She had metastatic breast cancer, and it metastasized to her brain and lungs. Functionally, that meant that, as it spread, she was getting less oxygen to her already compromised brain. We, and her friends, tried to get her to stop driving. She lived in AZ, where it was equally difficult. About a week before she entered, against her desire, inpatient hospice, she missed the turn to her house, and drove over railroad tracks to get there. It destroyed the underside of her car, and it couldn’t be driven. It sucks a lot when people become unsafe at doing what they are used to doing, but refuse to acknowledge that fact.


"Ah, looks like it's Xanax o'clock!"


Good camera work from Aubrey Plaza


Idk* who I love more, the guy who turn the golf cart off and threw his hands up, or the woman filming and then looking into the camera lol Edit: spelling*




\*Some drunk old guy lays on the floor\* Random stranger: :D


He needs some milk!




That look at the end: 😏


Damn that smile tho


I had to hit pause on that




Sometimes you gotta learn the hard way, and the hard way here boys and girls is face planting on concrete with a side of legal issues.


It’s nudey magazine day!


“Yep. He was also a raging asshole in high-school” ~Dale, class of ‘64


Karma kicked in after those flowers died. Let's spam f to respect the flowers. They did not even check on the flowers


One of my fears is me in 29.5 years.


The chick who put her face in looked hella cute


Straight up Aubrey Plaza camera glance there. 10/10


Bad grandpa all over again!


You don't talk them down, you get in there and take the keys if you have to before anything like that happens.