I am devastated and heart broken. And I can’t stop my tears. I say am fine , I say I am strong but I can feel my heart melt inside me.
By - Creative_Raise1894
I'm sorry for your loss 🥺 My first transfer failed as well. Even with a guarded heart and trying to manage expectations, nothing can prepare you for the sadness 😪
I’m so so sorry. TW: success. I had 3 egg retrieval and all resulted in 0 embryos. We ended up using donor eggs that we PGT tested. First transfer resulted in a chemical pregnancy. It was one of the worst times of my life. Second transfer was 1.5-2 months later and resulted in my 6mo old boy. No one can prepare you for the ups and downs of IVF. It’s mentally and emotionally exhausting. Grieve, allow yourself to be upset- because it is so so upsetting and unfair. Then once “better” (I use that term very loosely) come up with a game plan. Ask your RE questions - why she thinks it failed, does she recommend additional testing, can we go straight into another transfer, etc. I wish you luck ❤️
I am so sorry you are going through this . I had a failed FET about a month ago and I still feel broken . I knew going in this may be an outcome but it hit me like a ton of bricks when it happened . This is hard , sending hugs and just know you are not alone - all your feelings are valid
I‘m so sorry! I felt exactly the same way and I was devastated when 3 IVFs failed. What helped me and what I try to keep in my mind is the [embryo math](https://youtu.be/qQ_M1RX966g). I hope it helps you too to gain a different perspective. As others mentioned unfortunately it’s common to have a few tries before you succeed.
My first FET transfer also failed, with my best embryo. The emotional roller coaster is so hard to prepare for. I thought I would be ok but really struggled when it happened. I went into this process thinking it would just “work” because i has no known health issues and it was a great embryo, but there’s a lot that we can’t control. You’re not alone.
My first transfer with the best embryo, 5AA, failed. I was shocked after all the hype and thinking that IVF just works. It takes time to adjust your protocol and see what's going on. Nothing you did was wrong. I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry 🫂 I just got a BFN for my first tranfer this morning too. I don't know why, but I always had this confidence that we would beat the odds and our first transfer would work. I appreciate everyone commenting here as it's helping process the failed expectations ❤️
When I did my first IUI I was SO confident that it would 100% happen from my first try. When that test was negative I was devastated. I decided to go the IVF route that day.
But the thing is, IVF is still not 100%. And it sucks and it hurts, because you’re spending all this money and you’re putting yourself and your body through so much. It’s hard to reconcile that it might be for nothing. Surely if you spend money on something, you get something back, right? It’s difficult to understand that in our case, we might not get anything.
It’s so difficult to be positive and realistic at the same time. To me that’s been the hardest part of this journey.
OP, I’m sorry your first transfer failed. This journey is so difficult and it’s so hard to give encouragement. Because the cold truth is that a lot of us will never have that positive test. But we have strength. And that has to be enough.
Same, but this is the first cycle that ended in embryos for me. I have 3 more on ice and I’m trying to be optimistic for three more chances 🖤 Also, I plan on getting shit-faced. 🤷♀️
Oh no I am so sorry…. Out 1st transfer just failed too. 😭 It devastated me because it was our only AB grade embryo… and I have been so down. The ups and downs…
…. we will be planning a mock trial next to help figure out where it went wrong. Hang in there.
Im sorry to hear 😔have a good cry and do what you need to do. Don't ignore what's happened but maybr try and find some things to distract you (reading/diy/film) so that you can let your emotions have a rest here and there.
I found out yesterday that the transfer of our only embryo failed. This was my first cycle. Im distracting myself by putting in a plan for next steps. Got some new vitamins and have a follow up appt booked with clinic. I've sucked a lot of the emotion 😔ut of the process and am almost treating it like a work project 😅 not sure if that's the healthy way as I'm sure theirs some grief building up but it's working for me for now.
I wish you all the best!!!
Been there. It’s so hard. Just know you’re not alone, and you’re still one step closer to your baby ❤️
My first FET failed as well. Just found out last week. It's so devastating. Just letting you know that youre not alone. ❤️
I am so sorry. But you are not alone. I just failed my first transfer too. I know exactly what u feel. Sending hugs!
Mine did as well. I’m really feeling it today. Sending hugs. ❤️
Sending so much love, I am sorry
I’m sorry. My first ever IVF cycle was canceled for poor response then my first transfer from our second cycle failed. It’s heartbreaking when you put so much into this process and things don’t go your way. You’re not alone!
So sorry. On average it takes a couple of cycles to have success. I went into my first having watched and read so many stories of first time Success I just knew I’d have the same. It sucks big time.
I am sorry this is hard. I am going to start my first soon! Hugs
Sending hugs and love your way. My first transfer failed as well and I had never known a pain like that. So sorry you have to experience this.
Oh sweetheart I wish I could take your pain away. My first transfer ended in miscarriage. Just did my 2nd and I’m still not over losing the first. You never get “over it”.
My first transfer failed too and I had a really hard time for months afterwards. Sending you so much peace and healing ❤️🩹
Your grief is so understandable and normal. Take care of yourself and try to give yourself lots of grace and compassion as you work through the disappointment.
Failed cycles are so hard. Sending you strength and peace ❤️
My heart breaks for you, I’m so sorry. I just recently had my first embryo transfer as well. It’s all just so terrifying. I know it won’t help in the moment, but remember that you WILL be okay. You WILL overcome this. And you are never, ever alone. Big hugs❤️