T O P

Here's a Beaver carrying a carrot and a head of lettuce back to his home.

Here's a Beaver carrying a carrot and a head of lettuce back to his home.

LingonberryTop8942

Looking at the cameraman like "dude, are you gonna give me a hand here it just watch?"


ryan101

He's going to be sore as fuck tomorrow, but he got some serious gains today.


IHateSuspect

I know, I’m like “Help him!!”


ERtech23

Let somebody touch that carrot and see if they keep all their fingers. Idk a beaver’s temperament but id definitely mind my business with those chompers.


purplehendrix22

People have died from beaver bites, their teeth are basically daggers, they’re very high in iron which makes them orange, and they can bite very deep


ERtech23

Pretty much what I thought, but didn’t want to be an armchair zoologist or something.


Aeolian_Leaf

Pffft, what is reddit for if not pretending to be an expert in things you know nothing about?


SuperGameTheory

Hey, I'll have you know I have a bachelors in things I know nothing about.


binglelemon

I did my own research!


kapawolf

Um, reddit specialist here and I can explain wrong you are in an opinionated monolog while also pushing my point of view in multiple one-sided questions that you may answer one of and I'll explain how your wrong.


HolyForkingBrit

I try to only weigh in on stuffs I know about. Like I just added commentary on when poot poots roll up your front butt. I suppose I incorrectly thought others also only weighed in when they were actually knowledgeable on the subject at hand. Tsk, tsk to me.


halZ82666

Excuse me but what did I just read?


jadedfalcons

I think it was "I try to only weigh in on stuffs I know about. Like I just added commentary on when poot poots roll up your front butt. I suppose I incorrectly thought others also only weighed in when they were actually knowledgeable on the subject at hand. Tsk, tsk to me."


Diazepampoovey

I don't know why reading it the second time was so much better


jedininjashark

Happy cake day!


sockwall

Air follows the path of least resistance. If you're sitting just right and the cheeks are squished together(causing the usual path to be blocked off), the toots roll to the front.


MegannMedusa

I don’t know why you’re passing up the opportunity to say “front farts” over and over again but this is my first conversation about them too, so


hopbel

"Don't bother wild animals" is pretty common sense though


Aeolian_Leaf

Again, you're not understanding reddit, where you can't just assume common sense is present.


sushi_cw

According to my MS in Redditilogy, it's actually just a mycology forum that got waaaaaay out of hand.


DontForgetSquirrels

"Aww why not help teh little floffer!" *bites 3 fingers off* "Aww my fongers is a snack to him!"


CrackinBones204

Reminds me of Flanders swaddling the gremlin “aww isn’t that cute, he’s trying to claw my eyes out”


randomusername_815

Yep. I'm no beaverologist but any attempt to help him is gonna come off like you're trying to steal it. He's happy as anything lugging this jackpot haul.


NotaVogon

Beaverologist sounds like a term some guy would have on his t-shirt while trying to pick up women in a bar with cheesy one liners. Lmao


randomusername_815

"You like beaverologists girl? 'Coz DAM!"


NotaVogon

Lol! We need a thread of cheesy one liners. Esp since I'm trying to distract myself from th impending hurricane.


Even_Serve7918

Beaver? I hardly know her. I’m not a beaver but I can definitely fill your dam. I’m not a zoologist but I know a nice beaver when I see one. I’ll think of more later.


NotaVogon

Beaver? You brought her! Pure gold! Thank you! Storm just made landfall and we are stressing. This is very much an awesome distraction.


Myzyri

Beavers are mean ass pricks! Source: Crazy aunt is mountain lady and always warns to stay away from beavers because they’re mean as shit. She says she’d rather deal with a bear than a pissed off beaver (and she’s dealt with both - she’s fucking crazy, but she’s one serious bad ass bitch).


hisokas_fat_ass

More aunt stories please


CatConrad420

Yes I’d like to know more about crazy mountain aunt.


ERtech23

Then I will definitely take her word for it.


charredsound

I’d like a bad ass mountain chick apprenticeship with your aunt. She sounds lovely 😌


Pochez

I'd follow him and buy a ton of carrots.


clipboardpencil3

I'd put that little buddy on my shoulder, adjust the carrot so he can use it as a pointer, and carry him and his lettuce home. might even stop off somewhere and get him those fire logs outside circle k so he can add another floor to his house. then we would proceed on an he would point the way with his carrot in mouth.


jakester77777

That's just righteous!!!! 😂


didSomebodySayAbba

This is obviously cabbage


lunarmodule

He wouldn't be trying so hard if there wasn't nutritional value.


MinionMD

Me too!


[deleted]

r/donthelpjustfilm


SeeminglySusan

why didn’t he just get a cart


5_Frog_Margin

No quarter for the slot.


spooky_ed

Wouldn't beaver-y smart to waste a quarter when he can just carry it.


yougotyolks

Lettuce just be happy he was able to provide for his family. It seems people don't carrot all about that.


vishuskitty

Punny-est punchline is always in the comments!


44285268S1

Amazing.


5_Frog_Margin

[BEAVERS DON'T HAVE POCKETS](https://youtu.be/ZKHpkVXZFZ4?t=97)


PierceJames

Get him a bagpuck


MoonlightStrolla

Also, no pants


jaxonya

Also where was daggy-waggy to help?


barbecue_invader

He'd look a lot cooler if he rodent to his lodge on a cart, though.


8__D

You don't waste the quarter lol, you get it back after you return the cart


spooky_ed

Dam, I didn't gnaw that.


nopethanksguy

Chew know now


FaiDav

Stop it you absolute criminal.


delvach

Dam them


THOMASTHEWANKENG1NE

Just wooden nickels.


5_Frog_Margin

/r/Angryupvote


Frozen5147

Not surprising, the beaver probably only had nickels. Maybe he could have exchanged them for a quarter? (for the non-Canadians, the Canadian nickel has a beaver on it)


knightress_oxhide

So I tied a carrot to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of beavers on them. Give me a quarter for five beavers you'd say. Now where were we, oh ya. The important thing was that I had a carrot on my belt, which was the style at the time.


dj_1973

Do Canadians say, “gimme 5 B’s for a quarter?”


GammaBreak

Which was the style at the time.


WeAreGray

But the carts cost $1. Next time he should bring his neighbor, the Loons.


musicgeek420

Dam it!


snotwaffle420

People pay to use carts?


TecTazz

Yes. It incentivizes them to return the cart, lock it to the next one, and the quarter pops out.


Haplophyrne_Mollis

Yes I’ve been working as a cart pusher for 3 years through college I’ve made over $2000 from Left behind quarters. Rainy and snow days are big money.


152562

A quarter we have to put a quid in and the trolley return is over a grid


Jamster_1988

A quarter? 25 cents? Fuck. In England it's a quid (£1)


WillingnessDirect285

Im canadian and sometimes forget most of north America doesn't have loonies. This confused the hell out of me for a second.


SmashBusters

This was literally me in the grocery store yesterday. I didn't even plan on getting anything in particular. I was just walking past and figured I'd stop in and see if there's anything I need or is on sale. Fast forward 20 minutes. My arms are full and I'm struggling for a good two minutes trying to get some cilantro into a produce bag. I eventually give up, set everything down, and get the cilantro in. Then I look at my forearm and notice some wicked red creases in it. Toward the middle the creases turn dark blue-black. What the fuck? I get my groceries and go to checkout, finally getting a grocery bag for everything. The blue-black crease parts were still red this morning, but they're gone now. I don't like how my body keeps doing weird shit as I get older. I wasn't even gripping the groceries that hard!


Stunning-Response-67

I've done that also. Go in for a couple things and end up with arms full instead.


JakeFixesPlanes

He’s doing the best he can, okay?


MulliganPlsThx

Was just gonna say—this is me at Trader Joe’s when I stubbornly refuse to get a cart.


Papa_bear_321

Looks so proud


geared4war

He didn't have a toonie. But he should have a bag-for-life at least


LemmingDisaster

Me carrying all the groceries inside at once because I refuse to take multiple trips


castfam09

Sounds like my husband and we live on the third floor


ILikeSugarCookies

Being on the third floor makes it more necessary to get everything on one trip. Why walk 3 *extra* flights of stairs?


Talking_Head

I saw a comment today where someone said they live in a 5-story walk-up. Fuck that. I can’t imagine moving. Pivot…pivot…pivot…pivot…PIVOT!


RiseAtlas

I once moved in to a 4 story apartment by myself, only to realise there was a elevator, when I was done... Walked right past it around 20 times.


Talking_Head

Can I pet your head?


siccoblue

Get your poor husband a couple of oversized carabiners to loop all the handles through


Shaka_Brah728

Just create an elaborate pulley system to hoist it up


castfam09

We have been thinking about this. When we had Covid at the beginning of the year, we seriously started thinking how we could do that


Mmm_Spuds

They sell cushioned one specifically for this and I'm happy to see someone else knows what they are. Take the perfectly fitting free helpful I got lol


orcusgrasshopperfog

As someone who used to live in a second floor apartment I feel 2/3 of your pain.


Darkstar1911

🤔


ILikeSugarCookies

The beaver ain’t no *two trip bitch*.


Talking_Head

If you are near a Harbor Freight (probably on eBay and Amazon as well.) I got a few of these on sale for $2 each. Great for grocery bags and extension cords. I can put enough grocery weight on these that I have to stop and take breaks along the way. Obviously, not rated for rock climbing. https://www.harborfreight.com/8-inch-jumbo-aluminum-hook-95327.html


CT_7

It's always 'challenge accepted'


shawster

DID HE EVER MAKE IT? WHERE IS HIS HOME? YOU CANT MAKE ME WATCH A BEAVER STRUGGLE TO CARRY LETTUCE FOR 2 MINUTES AND NOT SHOW HIM MAKING IT BACK TO HIS HOME WITH HIS LETTUCE.


pikachus_lover

RIGHT?? WHAT KIND OF JERKWAD FILMS SOMETHING LIKE THIS AND DOESN'T KEEP IT UP UNTIL THE END??


Jegator2

Yes, This!


wtfRichard1

I wanna know where they got the carrot / cabbage from lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


wtfRichard1

I will now stay awake until the end of my days as this will be added onto things I will fear. I’m trembling as we speak


paulaustin18

https://youtu.be/x2J7EPWfcdI


blake_exists

I think he did make it back to his home, a puddle


heather528x

Aww why do I feel bad for him


siccoblue

He's trying so hard 😭


Oat_milk__latte

That Linkin Park song couldn't be more true...


BagOfToenails

_I tried so hard_ _and got so far..._ _But in the end_ _It wasn't even lettuce_


itaniumonline

It’s based on beavers bringing groceries back home you know.


WowzaCannedSpam

I don’t know much about beavers BUT I do know they love a few things; food, water, mud, and sticks. I genuinely think this beaver is living his best life right here in this video lol. If anyone is a uh, beaver expert I’d love to know more!


solongandthanks4all

I really want to give him a little backpack and teach him how to use it.


Seakawn

I felt bad that they kept dropping it. It looked like a struggle. I felt worse when it fell in the (probably dirty) rain puddle. I feel like saying "poor fella," but that beaver probably doesn't give a fuck and is just happy to ultimately get where they're going. Which makes me happy. Also, if its worst struggle that day was transporting a head of lettuce, then overall it was probably a good day. It could be having a much worse struggle. Like, unmangling itself from the tires of a car that just ran over its legs, or something.


ultrablight

the beaver is going to soak it in a dirty puddle before eating it anyways


rain_wagon

His wife is making a salad and she sent him out to get a couple ingredients.


ChaosDesigned

They're making Beaver Stew he got carrots and cabbage.


Oat_milk__latte

If it makes you feel better, he probably washed it in the pond.


DiscombobulatedYak89

I promise you he does not give a flying beaver fuck if his lettuce gets dirty lol


ChaosDesigned

He's thinking the whole time. Fuck this is so hard I should just leave it. But its gunna be so good. I worked so hard to carry it this far. I can do. I can do it. This is gunna be some bomb ass stew.


hisnameisbrock

I’m just thinking about how his mammalian brain is having him forage to support his family and how that same part of the brain carried into ours 🥺


jerkmanl

Because you're assigning human pathos to an animal. Don't. The beav is living in paradise. Doesn't have to go through the hardships of winter or being killed by a predator. And it doesn't have the futility response to think that the repeated dropping of a cabbage should be as stressful as it is.


[deleted]

Don't, I'm sure he's quite happy with his score :)


Professional_Aide499

This the best day of his life 😂😂 literally too much to carry.


musclecard54

Don’t. He’s on his way to feast with his family :)


Omikets

Oopth! Dropped my lettuth. Oopth! Dropped my lettuth. Oopth! Dropped my lettuth.


HelenHerriot

I’ve had such a stressful day, and this just made me giggle so much. Love this! (Love thith!)


guitarmad1990

I’m now reading every comment like dith


anand9362

I'm weading evewy commenth wike vhis


oldswirlo

Oh dear this comment made me happy


SuppleFoxFluff

No wayth I wath going to pay 15c for a bag!


PsstDangerZone

Sounds like a tiny Mike Tyson


kosmonautinVT

You don't want to let that beaver get close to your ear, I tell you hwhat


chubbycatchaser

Hahaha!


Marzbar255558

The speed I read this lined up with the video perfectly


Asmatarar

Hahahahahahahahahaha omg thank you for the laugh!


Baby-cabbages

🏆


greentreefer

"Got these for a steal, too bad they didnt have bags to carry things though..."


ImAWizardYo

Beaver knows what's up. Eating healthy always worth the extra effort.


Talking_Head

Apparently they collect and store enough food in their winter larder to feed other rodents like muskrats. And will even share their lodge. All the while, swimming out every day to keep foraging. Amazing little guys.


KakarotMaag

That's a cabbage.


Sutarmekeg

r/cabbagerecognition


Themlethem

Damn, hoped that was real.


iliketoupvotepuns

Is now


Lord_Cabbage_the_5th

Finally, a place where my people can prosper.


caytie82

I knew SOMEBODY in over 800 comments had to have said it.


CraniumFornication

Not my cabbages!!


wovagrovaflame

The superior round leafy vegetable


Bean_Slapper

You’re a cabbage you damn radish


KakarotMaag

I'm a carrot, my brother was the radish.


Clockwork_Kitsune

You made this gif so long that I was deeply invested and then ultimately disappointed that I'll never know if he got his produce home.


byDMP

Market days are the best.


polkjamespolk

looks more like a cabbage to me. Maybe he's planning on making some cole slaw.


Technical-Avocado233

Hehe his little waddle


_aVRageJoe_

And the *plap plap* of his feet


whatsthe20

The store charges 0.10$ a bag man, cut the guy some slack, he's helping keep plastic out of the environment.


ChaosDesigned

He didn't want it to end up in his river anyway


[deleted]

My man making a salad!!!


WeAreBeyondFucked

Looks more like cabbage soup or coleslaw


llama_AKA_BadLlama

Throw in some roots, peppa. baby, you gotta stew goin.


MindlessRationality

And thus the TRex was reincarnated once more upon the earth.


SuperDoody

As I was watching this, I was imagining a T-Rex trying to walk like that with the back leg of a triceratops in its mouth and carrying its head.


8ails

He doesn't have thumbs! Help him!!


castfam09

Kinda does. He is walking on his 2 hind feet and 2 front feet are holding lettuth lol


jmiac15

What are those animals behind him?


acs654

[Maras](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mara_\(mammal\)), maybe?


Prysorra2

"What the fuck are those ENORMOUS rabbits?"


jpritchard

Female jackalopes. You can tell they're female because they lack the antlers.


COMBATIBLE

He cant wait to get this home and see the happy look on Mrs Beavers face.


upside-down-11

I didn’t realize that their feet were so big and webbed! Looks like dinosaur feet.


Chinojo

Dam he cute! 😘


1iioiioii1

Gonna make a dam good salad.


Sololop

No u


Fun-Meringue3620

Leave it to beaver.


Talking_Head

*Leave it to Beaver* A good documentary on Amazon Prime. I watched it last night; less than an hour. I was surprised at how much weight they can actually haul around—mostly by pure perseverance. They even slug around giant mouthfuls of mud and debris to patch things up. Industrious, big rodents with iron fortified teeth surviving and thriving on nothing more than weeds and bark.


11th-plague

Healthy beaver


1Rab

I need more


insomsanity

Oregon Zoo has beavers carrying stuff all the time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AopPb3C7g4


Jumpsnake

Only. One. Trip. With. The. Groceries!


meltingdiamond

That is a cabbage, not lettuce.


kunkthewiser

Thank you!


iamTMoney22

Little man just kept dropping it. Felt bad for the homie!


Soulborg87

dude just going home from the grocery store


tdwesbo

Gone Mak a salet


Nooddlless

Help him you heartless monster!


eatmahanus

Big steppy


RawrNurse

Way way more committed to eating salad than I will ever be


theyipper

"I hella scored!"


LordBlackDragon

I'm just picturing this beaver in an apron making a stew for its family.


Far_Consideration_52

I dont get to see him make it to the water man I am sad now


phoenixember

"No Karen, I can get it all in one trip, I'm not going back out to the car."


Audio_Track_01

r/donthelpjustfilm


Talking_Head

Well, someone went to Whole Foods to buy the cabbage and carrots. And I’m guessing this little guy doesn’t carry around cash or a debit card—due to, you know, lack of pockets.


damnbruh23

He shoulda called Uber


Wicker_Khagan

I can just imagine the beaver bringing those to the beaver family all proud of themselves and like the beaver family is all happy and they eat their veggies together.


SOOOAP_

This makes me want to eat healthy. Animals use so much effort to get foods id prefer not to eat.


Bdduubb

This was me at the grocery store today for sure.


planbfailedmyparents

Help him or get out of the way!!


pikadegallito

"It's soup night, Susan."


DankVaderDan

Surprised he was allowed to have that and instead of a fat greedy ground hog eating it first


Chef_Face

i love his flipper feet


fishdrinking2

Damn, and those are the good flat head cabbages!!!


ArsonX24x

A one trip fellow of culture, I respect this


Canaricantransplant

This is me reincarnated. No fucking way am I making two trips to bring the grocery in


Glass-Membership2680

That is one health conscious beaver