Why are you even contemplating getting a record for this girl? Is it some masculinity thing to prove you're a real man by being a dumbass? Grow up. Call the cops to handle this. Continue to work on yourself.


nah she left you for this guy. and you really think thats gonna "win her over" or something? nah dude this isn't a Disney Movie she messed up 😂 move on. take my advice. just forget her


Bruh, what kind of disney movies do you watch? 😅


Yes you should go kick his ass really good and then while you're sitting in jail because she would testify against you and they're both laughing their ass off and he will still be beating her ass it'll all be good


Gotta get that Mulan training montage in. But also no, fuck her. She made her choice.


Damm it’s funny cuz every guy has alittle of a Disney movie in our head 😂😂😂




After reading the title: no, After reading the body of text: still no


😂😂 agreed! I was like um what? Then I got further into the text and I was like, oh I see. But why?!?😂


Fight him? No. But if you know for a fact that she is being abused, depending on where you’re located you could try and possibly report it. There is always a risk of blowback however, just don’t do something that will get you in trouble.


Well, I guess you gotta do something. However, you have to consider the consequences. If you beat him up yeah, he will just go beat her up even more. Maybe you could like idk, contact her dad or sum? Tell him what’s up? Hell appreciate it. Imagine if it was your daughter and didn’t know about it.. call her dad bro, ask if he needs help punishing him…. I don’t get people telling you to let her suffer. What a sick mindset, yeah, she’s your ex, and so what….


Could not agree more, no one deserves abuse regardless of the circumstances or what they have done, we've all done shitty things in our lives after all, however, any interference, will more than likely result in you being made out to be the bad guy, so if anything, drop an anon call to crimestoppers, or an anon text to somebody who cares about that person and will help that person get out of that situation, because getting yourself involved usually results in negativity for yourself, and after a break up, if you really still care about that person, the last thing you'll want to do is alienate yourself to that person


The general sentiment is to tell police, not let her suffer.


Please do. Get arrested. Ruin your life. That'll win her back so she can leave you again. /s




Exactly!!!!!!!!!!!! Trauma will have ppl seeing sideways.


How did you find out that her current bf is hitting her?


Yeah throw your life away and go to jail for someone that left you for a loser. Look, I get it. It’s not your problem. You aren’t her savior. And honestly she’ll probably sympathize with him and say look what my crazy ex did. Don’t do this man, waste of your life.


No, you shouldn’t fight him. You should talk to her about domestic abuse and what help is out there/how SHE can report him. You can’t report him if she’s over 18. Domestic abuse victims also are usually afraid to contact law enforcement or report their abuser.


The people saying to let her suffer are so disgusting it blows my mind. Keep an open heart and let her know you’re here for her if she needs. Feeling alone and having no one to talk to while in an abusive relationship is a pain I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. It’s so hard to leave situations like that. Y’all need to do better.


Yeah but at the same time no. Then he will beat her ass even more if he finds out she’s talking to her ex. I say don’t reach out to her at all. Coming from someone who has been in a physically abusive relationship.


Coming from someone who’s been in one as well I can understand that because my abuser threatened my guy friends as well. It’s a tricky situation all together. But the people saying she can suffer are gross


This sub is high key misogynistic. So many angry men here who just want to hear what they want to and that they did nothing wrong.


She was also abusive too though, so idk I am so lost. I am trying to be there for her but it’s hard.


>She was also abusive too though, so idk I am so lost. I am trying to be there for her but it’s hard. Sounds like karma. Stop trying to be there for someone who doesn't want you in your life. Have some self-respect please.


That wasn’t mentioned in the op, but I understand. It can be hard trying to navigate in this situation. All you can really do is observe from a far


I’ll do that thank you I don’t want ppl knowing how she treated me lol. I still care and I’ll try to be there for her.


Literally no one cares about this but you. Stop trying to act like you’re protecting her. You’re not. She does not want you and I doubt she cares how you feel.


Nah. Call the police or her friends, but keep it anonymous. You don’t wanna get involved with that. Especially when you’re the ex. There’s a lot of anger from the guy (obviously) and he’ll probably get jealous of you. Jealousy mixed with a violent person is not a good combo. That’s how some people get killed. So please contact the authorities or a friend of hers, but stay out of it


Report the abuse but also understand she made her choice to be with him. Like someone said, last thing you want is to fight him, you end up in jail and they’re both kissing in the sunset


let her dad or brother handle that she ain’t ur problem no more


These comments are concerning. As a man I understand the masculine urge to wanna throw hands, but it’s not a good idea at all. It’s also a horrible idea to turn a blind eye to it because ‘she made her choice’, or ‘she picked him over you’. Consider common decency. Inform her parents, family or the police. Don’t get physically involved, but you can help from afar


He could be lying about this shit. I seriously doubt she called to tell him this herself. He’s being a creep by trying to find shit out about her life.


While that certainly IS an option, this version of yourself that you've been working on shouldn't get involved with her. She chose to move on with someone who hits her. That's her mistake and although it is unfortunate and wrong that she is being hit, it doesn't concern you right now. You're above all that mess, aren't you? She can leave him at any time, even press charges if she wants. Be the new you.


Nah bro you point and laugh


Nope, you can help her and file a report or file a complaint for an investigation to start if at all possible, at best reach out to people close to her so that they support her but don't be the knight in shinning armor, not because you're not together but simply because, you don't know how that could end. With you hurt? With her taking his side (cycles of abuse are difficult to break and you'd be surprise the extent people can put up with)? The guy jumping you in the middle of the night? So no, help, in a sensible manner because you do care but take caution, don't expect anything in return either. Good luck man.


She made her choice...


She didn’t make her choice to be hit. What a stupid fucking statement. 😡


Obviously. She chose this other person and continues to do so


Yes she did. But he’s hitting her and I would say something.


Why? She obviously doesn't care about OP


Because. That’s the decent thing to do. He’s fucking hitting her. 😡


Imagine going to jail for someone that doesn't giving a shit about you


Most guys who hit women turn to jelly when you confront them. He would probably start crying. No one’s going to jail. Except him.


Nope. Not your circus, not your monkeys, anymore. If she has brothers or a father, that's their job.


Fighting is something adults don’t do


Punish him in some way without taking collateral damage. Not for her, but for everyone else. People and other women in your community will notice.


The people in this thread saying let her suffer are trash


That’s so fucjed up wtf man. “Let her suffer” what a sick mindset


Her body, her choice




I’d you’re asking / saying things like ‘should I fight my ex’s bf’ I don’t think you should be fighting your ex’s bf


>Should fight my ex’s new bf? No. >I recently found out, that her bf hits her, I was mad because I would never do that to her. I still care about her so much. Should I fight my ex’s bf? ..... Not your problem anymore, no.


No, leave her to suffer the consequences of her actions. If you truly love her, you need to allow her the chance for personal growth, which involves her choosing who is good for her and who is not.


Not your problem anymore lmao


Sorry buddy I don’t condone violence but she basically cheated on you and that is Karma for her. My ex friend goes on the same thing which led her to break up in that guy she cheated with.


nah she made her choice.let her deal with the consequences


Sorry but I have no sympathy for people who left their longest partner or even cheated on their partner to be with someone else who would abuse them later on. She deserves the consequences that she did to you. Buddy if I were you I wouldn’t give a single shit that is her fucking karma.


I dunno...do you have mad fighting skills? If so, then absolutely you should fight him, but only if it is to the death, and you have to choose your own weapon either from the Renaissance Faire swordsmith booth or a knife that you get from a mall kiosk. Extra points if the weapon has spikes on it or an etching of a dragon. Go show her what its like for a real man to prove himself to her - that will make her want you again. Its a flawless plan. /s Seriously....do you even listen to yourself? NO, thats a stupid idea. Like flat out stupid. Grow up, thats not how things work in adult land.


No. But you should speak to her about leaving him. Being in an abusive relationship can lead to devastating consequences. And No, do not use this an opportunity to win her back.


Yes 🍿


No need to fight him for her. That’s her problem and she can call the cops. If anything you dodged a bullet. Don’t waste time or energy on this person.


i would do nothing in this situation. little good could come from it. first off you get involved in a messy situation you don’t need involved in. he’s surely going to retaliate if anything is done or said to him about it. if you beat him up chances are he either comes to kill or beat you up later. if he finds out why he beats the shit out of her for it. if cops are called for it chances are he does the same thing. same case with family involved. and as for her she needs to be the one to stand up for herself. she obviously has the strength to leave and end a relationship because she did it with you. but she chooses this man, who she knows will hit her. and she probably knows you’ll take her back in a heartbeat too so she has other options and better options she isn’t pursuing.


Sorry man, you two broke up and found someone else (i.e. she wasn't interesting in going back to you). Leave it. Everyone chooses their own path with pros and cons..it is not your business anymore Keep working on yourself because a bright future its ahead


I've done that, not a good idea mate. Got a record because of that. And it's totally not worth the fuss. She moved on and so you should do as well. Trust me, it's for the better in us. Stay strong.


Absolutely not. You can let her loved ones know and see if they can offer her resources. Don’t catch a charge over it.


Did you see her being hit? Do you know this to be an irrefutable fact? That’d be my first question. Even if that was the case, terrible as it is to hit a women, no you probably shouldn’t fight your ex girlfriends boyfriend. Fighting is usually the wrong answer, especially when you have time to contemplate. When I was young, my girlfriend got punched at a party she was at. I was pissed and went to confront the guy. I ended up getting stabbed in the leg and gang beat, hospitalized. No serious injuries. Point is I could have been killed. Someone was blindly stabbing at me. Over his friend hitting a girl. It’s just not worth it man, the drama and potential for catastrophe. Maybe reach out to your ex girlfriend and offer support. Find another way to help her.


You got anger issues🦭


I don’t want to sound harsh, you might not like my answer, is nope that’s her problem she the one that hurt you right? That’s what she gets for hurting you, karma has an interesting way of taking its course. I don’t condone domestic violence, I look at it as a wake up call. Is not worth it fighting another dude over a female is senseless, what you need to do is continue working on yourself, growth is power. The best revenge is to live well


Fight for her back if you love her and think shes worth it. But this is a tough one. Im sorry bro


he's gonna beat your ass. stay in your lane.


She is her own person and has to make her own decisions. She also already made a decision and that was to keep you out of her life. Don’t make a mistake by ignoring her wishes. If she asks you, then you can totally make decision then. But until then, best to stay away.


NO. Just NO. I’m not trying to be mean but let her face the consequence of her actions and you my lad, just stay out of trouble and get your life together.


Report him to the police. Tell her friends if you need to..then Step aside..heal...and keep it moving


My ex told me not to talk to anyone while she was away in rehab. Then she came out of rehab with a new boyfriend. I wanted to get revenge so bad. I could not understand why she could so easily discard the one who stood by her side through everything. Then I found out he has been making poor choices through the grapevine. I witnessed him flirting with other girls, too. I love my ex with all my being. Does it hurt me to see someone do that to her? Absolutely. BUT! She made this choice. This person is the one she picked between the two of us. I could do crazy off the wall stuff in an act of passion. But what will that accomplish? Think it through until the end. You’d not only harm another human being, but you could catch charges and ruin your reputation. Is the anger justified? Absolutely. Yet she is an adult and she is actively choosing this relationship with this guy. You can’t save her. You can’t win her back by hurting the one she cares about now. At the end of the day, you’d only hurt yourself even worse and stunt your progress. Don’t run on emotion. It’ll drive you into a wall.


Nah. She chose to leave you to get her ass beat therefore let her get her ass beat.


I'd call the cops, but I'd also probably laugh at her because the way she left me like I never even mattered hurt to much.


Justice by own hand never ends well, if you want to do something, call the cops, but don't put yourself in unnecessary trouble


Her loss and her decision. Want to be the bigger man? Stay out of it. I get you care and I respect you for that. If you really care that much about her then consider reporting it. Going there and childishly fighting this dude makes you no better than him. Look I get it, it would hurt me if I still loved my ex and she was getting hit. But doing what you described never has the positive outcome you’re imagining. And she will most likely suffer even more.


The universe will work in your favour, Tables turn.


No you shouldn’t. I know you’re hurting right now but that hurt will go away. Fighting someone can effect the rest of your life, even after the hurt is gone. Idk how old she is, but maybe reach out to her family. The authorities can’t do anything if she’s an adult and denies the abuse to them. Unfortunately, adults can “choose” to be in a bad situation, even if everyone around them knows it’s unsafe. But do not ruin your future over an ex. I promise it’s not worth it.


Long answer: nope Short answer: no I feel like a hypocrite saying this but you have to move on, you’ve learned your lesson, she left you and now she’s with someone else, regardless of how you feel that should be an indication that she didn’t really love you because you don’t simply move on that quickly from someone, fighting her new boyfriend will only be a dangerous waste of your time, I know it hurts but there’s nothing you can do or should do, let her be happy man, focus more on yourself and you’ll start to slowly let go


Shes not your problem anymore. Sticking your nose in places they don't belong is a good way to get a broken nose. Do like the other person said - call the cops make a report and move on.


Nah bro, she left you. Let her save herself.


Are you 12?


Mind your business. Karma got her


Nah she got her Karma, she’s a grown woman. She can leave the new guy or call authorities if she needs to.