T O P
UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 5 ○ ▼ 6 REK 1 ○ ● 2 Outs REK 2B [Larold](/u/TrickyTroy2) 0-2 / K,GO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806053?1217?1153)


TrickyTroy2

GG 1000


UmpireDevilHernandez

Johnny lines up. Pitches this to a 3-2 count. Larold stares him down. Johnny stares right back. The stare down commences. Why hasn’t Johnny pitched yet? Why are they still just staring? Stop staring. Pitch. Okay yay here it comes, ayyy batta batta batter SWING! And he whiffs! Strike 3. Game over. Highlanders win 5-1 **Swing:** 1000 **Pitch:** 488 **Diff:** 488 **Result:** K 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 5 ○ ▼ 6 REK 1 ○ ● 1 Out REK C [Ded Tanson](/u/Sickboy2212) 0-2 / PO,K[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806052?1217?3070)


sickboy2212

22


UmpireDevilHernandez

Ded keeps dead swinging at the ball. This one is for another K to bring us even closer to the end of the game **Swing:** 22 **Pitch:** 591 **Diff:** 431 **Result:** K 2 outs, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 5 ○ ▼ 6 REK 1 ○ ○ 1 Out REK SS [Thor Heyerdahl](/u/qomsday) 1-2 / 1B,DP[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806051?1217?3066)


qomsday

Can’t be too much worse than I’ve done so far 112


UmpireDevilHernandez

Thor come in now, a single and a DP to their name so far. With just 2 outs remaining, the Valks need baserunners and a single poked through the hole will get us started! **Swing:** 112 **Pitch:** 188 **Diff:** 76 **Result:** 1B 1 out, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 5 ○ ▼ 6 REK 1 ○ ○ 0 Out REK 1B [Ura Irons](/u/Ocelot_Tuga) 0-1 / GO,BB[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806050?1217?4044)


Ocelot_Tuga

123


UmpireDevilHernandez

Bottom of the 6th now and it's going to take something special from the Valks to get back in to this one. Dickshot has been great all game, and needs just 3 more outs to bring their team back to a .500 record. Johnny is off to a great start here as they first 3 strikes in quick succession and catch Ura way late on the third one to secure the swinging strikeout. **Swing:** 123 **Pitch:*** 631 **Diff:** 492 **Result:** K 1 out, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Sandy Collazo on the mound** HFX 5 ○ ▲ 6 REK 1 ● ○ 2 Outs HFX LF [Kegs Mabry](/u/kegs_is_great) 2-3 / K,1B,1B[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806049?2036?1098)


Kegs_is_Great

75


UmpireDevilHernandez

Kegs up now, on a 2 hit day, looking to get one more and drive in the 6th run for Halifax. Sandy has other ideas however, nibbling the corners with strikes that looks like balls, managing to strikeout Kegs looking. **Swing:** 75 **Pitch:** 501 **Diff:** 426 **Result:** K 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Sandy Collazo on the mound** HFX 5 ○ ▲ 6 REK 1 ● ○ 1 Out HFX SS [Kenny Kawaguchi](/u/Therealslimcampbell) 2-3 / HR,3B,K[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806048?2036?5021)


therealslimcampbell

112


UmpireDevilHernandez

Kenny man, so hot today since my Kenny K comment- oh what’s this? You’re not Kenny K Kawaguchi K? Damn sorry to hear the bad news **Swing:** 112 **Pitch:** 648 **Diff:** 464 **Result:** K 2 outs, Runner on 3rd


UmpireDevilHernandez

Pinch hitting time **Sandy Collazo on the mound** HFX 3 ● ▲ 6 REK 1 ● ○ 1 Out HFX 2B [Trevor Rose](/u/Trexxy2) 1st AB / .333[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806047?2036?8002)


Trexxy2

402


UmpireDevilHernandez

Trevor cracks this game more open than Bobby’s mum (Bobby if you see this, fight me bruhv) with a triple hit right over the center fielders head. Trevor debates running home, but the third base coach tells good dad jokes so he stays at third **Swing:** 402 **Pitch:** 424 **Diff:** 22 **Result:** 3B 1 out, Runner on 3rd


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Sandy Collazo on the mound** HFX 3 ● ▲ 6 REK 1 ● ○ 1 Out HFX 2B [Bill Stokes](/u/diepie316) 1-3 / 1B,GO,GO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806047?2036?7019)


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Sandy Collazo on the mound** HFX 3 ● ▲ 6 REK 1 ○ ● 0 Out HFX DH [Kilometers Straw](/u/NarwhalHorn) 0-2 / DP,K[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806046?2036?7033)


NarwhalHorn

534


UmpireDevilHernandez

Kilometers Straw now, looking out and seeing 2 of his team mates on the bases and a bug ol' donut in the outs column. They swing at a 2-2 slider and manage to poke it off the end of the bat, it's sharply hit and eats up the shortstop! The runners both make it safely to the next base along but Thor manages to recover in time to make the throw to first and record the out. **Swing:** 534 **Pitch:** 744 **Diff:** 210 **Result:** GORA 1 out, Runners on 2nd and 3rd


UmpireDevilHernandez

NEW PITCHER ALERT!!!! **Sandy Collazo on the mound** HFX 3 ○ ▲ 6 REK 1 ○ ● 0 Out HFX CF [Reese Worthington](/u/lakers4life1214) 0-2 / K,FO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806045?2036?4007)


lakers4life1214

222


UmpireDevilHernandez

Reese Worthington steps up now, Halifax anxious to get some insurance runs on the board and Joe Pidgeon looks angsty at first... Reese swings and makes contact, Joe's off to the races toward second base! The ball is heading toward to the third base side and Jack Alpha dives.....gloves it but can't squeeze and the ball falls to the ground underneath their body! Joe is at second now as Reese goes all out to reach first... Alpha recovers, grabs the ball, fakes to second to hold Joe there but they won't have a play on Worthington! Everybody's safe! **Swing:** 222 **Pitch:** 92 **Diff:** 130 **Result:** 1B 0 outs, Runners on 1st and 2nd


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 3 ○ ▲ 6 REK 1 ○ ○ 0 Out HFX RF [Joe Pidgeon](/u/AnAngryPidgeon) 1-1 / 1B,BB[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806044?3089?6011)


AnAngryPidgeon

Give a home run here so Johnny Dickshot can go home for Christmas Swing: 300


UmpireDevilHernandez

HO! HO! WHO do you think I am, Santa Claus?! I don't do requests! You'll have a base hit and you'll be happy with it! **Swing:** 300 **Pitch:** 221 **Diff:** 79 **Result:** 1B 0 outs, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 3 ○ ▼ 5 REK 1 ○ ○ 2 Outs REK CF [Homer Knocker](/u/CableCubed) 0-2 / GO,FO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806043?1217?6010)


CableCubed

GO FO deez nuts Swing 578


UmpireDevilHernandez

No thank you. I'll watch as Johnny Dickshot GO FO POwns you this game. **Swing:** 578 **Pitch:** 342 **Diff:** 236 **Result:** PO 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 3 ○ ▼ 5 REK 1 ○ ○ 1 Out REK DH [Trogdor Fhqwhgads](/u/dahdscear) 0-1 / FO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806042?1217?4040)


Dahdscear

Dickshot!? More like Shotdick. 800 level burn


UmpireDevilHernandez

Fhqwhgads!? More like Asdgfvnfo. 408 level return burn. **Swing:** 800 **Pitch:** 208 **Diff:** 408 **Result:** K 2 outs, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 3 ○ ▼ 5 REK 1 ○ ○ 0 Out REK 3B [Jack Alpha](/u/androidsen) 1-1 / HR[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806041?1217?2057)


androidsen

419


UmpireDevilHernandez

Jack Alpha, the home run hero earlier in the game up now, looking to repeat. Jack puts a good swing on this changeup and the ball has some power behind it, soaring through the air into the outfield! But the Highlanders defense is perfectly positioned, Joe Pidgeon reads it excellently, takes 3 steps in and makes the grab. **Swing:** 419 **Pitch:** 213 **Diff:** 206 **Result:** FO 1 out, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 3 ○ ▲ 5 REK 1 ○ ● 2 Outs HFX 1B [King Kruul](/u/Druidicdwarf) 0-2 / K,FO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806040?3089?4000)


Druidicdwarf

Hi there! Can I have a 392 please? Ty for ping and have a great day.


UmpireDevilHernandez

You have 392, you can have this ping, but sadly, you cannot have a base today **Swing:** 392 **Pitch:** 135 **Diff:** 257 **Result:** GO 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 3 ○ ▲ 5 REK 1 ○ ○ 2 Outs HFX 3B [Phillip Dunphy](/u/zaran_peer12) 1-1 / BB,1B[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806039?3089?6019)


zaran_peer12

850


UmpireDevilHernandez

Phillip continues their day of making it to first base, let’s see if they can make it past second this time **Swing:** 850 **Pitch:** 970 **Diff:** 120 **Result:** 1B 2 outs, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 3 ○ ▲ 5 REK 1 ○ ○ 1 Out HFX C [Mike Litoris](/u/fai2k) 0-2 / K,K[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806038?3089?6016)


fai2k

888


UmpireDevilHernandez

Love the 8’s, but remove one next time **Swing:** 888 **Pitch:** 88 **Diff:** 200 **Result:** FO 2 outs, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 3 ○ ▲ 5 REK 1 ○ ○ 0 Out HFX LF [Kegs Mabry](/u/kegs_is_great) 2-2 / 1B,1B[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806037?3089?1098)


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 3 ○ ▲ 5 REK 1 ○ ○ 0 Out HFX LF [Kegs Mabry](/u/kegs_is_great) 2-2 / 1B,1B[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806037?3089?1098)


Kegs_is_Great

675


UmpireDevilHernandez

Kegs, looking for their third hit of the day steps up now. 3 hits will not be in the cards though, as 3 swings and 3 misses result in a strikeout. **Swing:** 675 **Pitch:** 203 **Diff:** 472 **Result:** K 1 out, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▲ 5 REK 1 ○ ● 0 Out HFX SS [Kenny Kawaguchi](/u/Therealslimcampbell) 1-2 / 3B,K[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806036?3089?5021)


therealslimcampbell

98


UmpireDevilHernandez

Kenny Kawaguchi steps up now with a runner on first base and nobody out in the top of the 5th inning of this tie game. A triple & a strikeout so far today they've had a good game and they're looking to make it even better. Meanwhile Joey Wheeler is looking in for the signs. Just the 1 run conceded so far, the pitcher has done a good job of keeping their team in it. Looks like they've seen the sign they like, they nod, stand and here's the pitch... A fastball, but Joey grunts as it leaves the hand, did they twinge something there?! Kenny swings...CRACK!!! Oh my goodness! That ball is high! That ball is deep! That ball is GONE!!!! A zero doubter, zero differ, allllll the way back in the 5th deck! **Swing:** 98 **Pitch:** 98 **Diff:** 0 **Result:** HR 0 outs, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▲ 5 REK 1 ○ ○ 0 Out HFX 2B [Bill Stokes](/u/diepie316) 0-2 / GO,GO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806035?3089?7019)


diepie316

999


UmpireDevilHernandez

Bill Stokes up now, hoping to stoke the flames of this game which has been smoldering so far. A jam shot hit just above the hands won't do it though as this one rolls toward Larold but oh no! It seems the second baseman is paying the price for their unhygienic activities at the plate and they slip over and miss the ball completely! Stokes ends up with a leadoff single! **Swing:** 999 **Pitch:** 861 **Diff:** 138 **Result:** 1B 0 outs, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 1 ● ▼ 4 REK 1 ○ ● 2 Outs REK LF [Isaac Snowbender](/u/mvh1015) 0-1 / GO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806034?1217?3079)


mvh1015

Paulie (paulie my gm, not the fake paulie on their team) is mediocre. 666


UmpireDevilHernandez

Many people are saying this. **Swing:** 666 **Pitch:** 422 **Diff:** 244 **Result:** GO 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▼ 4 REK 1 ○ ● 2 Outs REK RF [Crypto Zoology](/u/mile114) 1-1 / 2B[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806033?1217?2056)


Mile114

Can ya'll chill i'm trying to bat. 900


UmpireDevilHernandez

Chill? There's a steaming pile of turd in the dugout who refuses to clean up their mess and you're asking me to chill?! Here's a single, good job. **Swing:** 900 **Pitch:** 810 **Diff:** 90 **Result:** 1B 2 outs, Runners on 1st and 2nd


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▼ 4 REK 1 ○ ● 1 Out REK 2B [Larold](/u/TrickyTroy2) 0-1 / GO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806032?1217?1153)


TrickyTroy2

Dropping a deuce on home plate currently. Will clean it up after i round these bases. 2


UmpireDevilHernandez

Round the bases?! You'll do no such thing ya dutty bwoy. You'll stay right here and clean this up and then you'll head back to the dugout in shame. **Swing:** N/A - mfer just pooped on home plate, they're out. >! 2!< **Pitch:** >!380!< **Diff:** >!378!< **Result:** >!K!< >!2 outs, Runner on 1st!<


TrickyTroy2

I aint cleaning up nothin. 💩


DaveyClarkman4Prez

Justice for Larold


UmpireDevilHernandez

I'll eject a mfer. Try me.


CableCubed

I'll eject all over the plate if you keep this up


TrickyTroy2

*walks back to dugout unphased*


CaptainSolo96

how's Georgia?


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▼ 4 REK 1 ○ ● 0 Out REK C [Ded Tanson](/u/Sickboy2212) 0-1 / K[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806031?1217?3070)


sickboy2212

355


UmpireDevilHernandez

Tanson, of the Ded variety, in the box now with a runner at first and nobody out. Dickshot looks in for the signs, nods and delivers...Danson swings and sends one high into the air but Ded got way under it and this one falls into the glove of the catcher 10 feet up the first base line. **Swing:** 355 **Pitch:** 122 **Diff:** 233 **Result:** PO 1 out, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▼ 4 REK 1 ○ ○ 0 Out REK SS [Thor Heyerdahl](/u/qomsday) 0-1 / DP[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806030?1217?3066)


qomsday

Paulie says I can’t DO this time but you just watch and see 142


UmpireDevilHernandez

Hey Paulie's right! DPing here is impossible, but good news! You can set up for one instead! **Swing:** 142 **Pitch:** 215 **Diff:** 73 **Result:** 1B 0 outs, Runner on 1st


qomsday

Supposed to be DP but I guess DO works


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▲ 4 REK 1 ○ ● 1 Out HFX DH [Kilometers Straw](/u/NarwhalHorn) 0-1 / K[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806029?3089?7033)


NarwhalHorn

207


UmpireDevilHernandez

Kilometers at the plate now with a chance to blow this game open with one swing. Best they can do is poke a grounder over to second base, a custom made double play ball and end the inning though. Doh! **Swing:** 207 **Pitch:** 700 **Diff:** 493 **Result:** DP 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▲ 4 REK 1 ○ ● 0 Out HFX CF [Reese Worthington](/u/lakers4life1214) 0-1 / FO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806028?3089?4007)


lakers4life1214

999


UmpireDevilHernandez

Reese Worthington steps in to the box now in a tie game in the 4th. A runner on first amps up the pressure, so Reese aims high and swings to the max! Unfortunately, Joey Wheeler has been consulting with a higher (lower?) power and summons a demon to help guide three pitches through the strike zone unscathed. A trip back to the dugout for Reese but there's still a runner on first and 2 outs remaining! **Swing:** 999 **Pitch:** 666 **Diff:** 333 **Result:** K 1 out, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▲ 4 REK 1 ○ ○ 0 Out HFX RF [Joe Pidgeon](/u/AnAngryPidgeon) 0-0 / BB[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806027?3089?6011)


AnAngryPidgeon

Speed… I am speed Swing: 2


UmpireDevilHernandez

The world's fastest pigeon has been observed travelling at speeds of more than 100 miles an hour which, coincidentally, is how fast you rip a liner through the infield! The world's fastest Joe Pidgeon has *not* been observed travelling at speeds of more than 100 miles per hour though, so you'll have to hold up at first as the ball is played back in quickly. **Swing:** 2 **Pitch:** 888 **Diff:** 114 **Result:** 1B 0 outs, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▼ 3 REK 1 ○ ○ 2 Outs REK 1B [Ura Irons](/u/Ocelot_Tuga) 0-0 / BB[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806026?1217?4044)


Ocelot_Tuga

I've finally found what I was looking for A place where I can be without remorse Because I am a stranger who has found an even stranger war I've finally found what I was looking for 742


UmpireDevilHernandez

Ura Irons steps into the box, humming a tune. They take a hack at a curveball but a hit will remain a stranger to Ura as this one is sent to the shortstop, then to first for a groundout. **Swing:** 742 **Pitch:** 466 **Diff:** 276 **Result:** GO 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▼ 3 REK 1 ○ ○ 1 Out REK CF [Homer Knocker](/u/CableCubed) 0-1 / FO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806025?1217?6010)


CableCubed

Paulie bad Swing 701


UmpireDevilHernandez

Write up too short, swing too long as Homer is late to a fast ball and can only manage to roll it over to the first base side. King Kruul gathers, steps on the bag and Homer trots back to the dugout to work on his writing. **Swing:** 701 **Pitch:** 378 **Diff:** 323 **Result:** GO 2 outs, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▼ 3 REK 1 ○ ○ 0 Out REK DH [Trogdor Fhqwhgads](/u/dahdscear) 1st AB / .188[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806024?1217?4040)


Dahdscear

Rackspace can suck my balls as I burninate their servers yet again 747


UmpireDevilHernandez

I have seen some of those words before and I even know the definition of most them and yet the meaning of this sentence evades me. Good luck with burninating I guess?! At least you'll have time as you hit a lazy flyball to left that's caught for out number one. Don't play with matches! **Swing:** 747 **Pitch:** 981 **Diff:** 234 **Result:** FO 1 out, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▼ 3 REK 0 ○ ○ 0 Out REK 3B [Jack Alpha](/u/androidsen) 1st AB / .294[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806023?1217?2057)


androidsen

239


UmpireDevilHernandez

So Devil Hernandez has a story about waking up earlier than he needed to, but now he just needs a good wake up call. And what better than a GAME TYING INNING STARTING HOMERUN BY JACK! THIS BALL IS GONE *whistle noise like a bomb dropping* **Swing:** 239 **Pitch:** 231 **Diff:** 8 **Result:** HR 0 outs, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 1 ● ▲ 3 REK 0 ○ ● 2 Outs HFX 1B [King Kruul](/u/Druidicdwarf) 0-1 / FO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806022?3089?4000)


Druidicdwarf

Hello! Can I have an 858 please? Thanks for umping and have a great night!


UmpireDevilHernandez

The always polite King Kruul steps in to the box and is warmly greeted by the Umps. Of course you can have an 858 my friend, but might I suggest that a 500 might have been more to your tastes? **Swing:** 858 **Pitch:** 500 **Diff:** 358 **Result:** K 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▲ 3 REK 0 ○ ● 2 Outs HFX 3B [Phillip Dunphy](/u/zaran_peer12) 1-1 / 1B[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806021?3089?6019)


zaran_peer12

350


UmpireDevilHernandez

Phillip, congratulations on first base. You can take it. Go ahead. Don’t be shy **Swing:** 350 **Pitch:** 203 **Diff:** 147 **Result:** BB 2 outs, Runners on 1st and 2nd


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 1 ○ ▲ 3 REK 0 ○ ● 1 Out HFX C [Mike Litoris](/u/fai2k) 0-1 / K[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806020?3089?6016)


fai2k

740


UmpireDevilHernandez

Mike, watch yo jet bro watch you jet. Stop swinging at literally every pitch. That’s two K’s now **Swing:** 740 **Pitch:** 50 **Diff:** 310 **Result:** K 2 outs, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▲ 3 REK 0 ● ○ 1 Out HFX LF [Kegs Mabry](/u/kegs_is_great) 1-1 / 1B[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806019?3089?1098)


Kegs_is_Great

125


UmpireDevilHernandez

Kegs lines up. Oh boy oh boy this is a great position for another single isn’t it? I- wow actually a single. Dang I was trying for the announcers jinx **Swing:** 125 **Pitch:** 40 **Diff:** 85 **Result:** 1B 1 out, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▲ 3 REK 0 ○ ○ 1 Out HFX SS [Kenny Kawaguchi](/u/Therealslimcampbell) 0-1 / K[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806018?3089?5021)


therealslimcampbell

822


UmpireDevilHernandez

Kenny what is it with you and multiples of 3? 3 K’s with your name + result. 3 strikes. And now 3 bases? Damn you’ve triple tripled up in here **Swing:** 822 **Pitch:** 844 **Diff:** 22 **Result:** 3B 1 out, Runner on 3rd


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▲ 3 REK 0 ○ ○ 0 Out HFX 2B [Bill Stokes](/u/diepie316) 0-1 / GO[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806017?3089?7019)


diepie316

916


UmpireDevilHernandez

Bill Stokes this ball right back to the pitcher… who throws them out at first to continue this shutout for both sides **Swing:** 916 **Pitch:** 598 **Diff:** 318 **Result:** GO 1 out, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 0 ● ▼ 2 REK 0 ○ ○ 2 Outs REK LF [Isaac Snowbender](/u/mvh1015) 1st AB / .278[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806016?1217?3079)


[deleted]

[удалено]


UmpireDevilHernandez

And it will be going down after a soft grounder straight back to the pitcher. To the bench with you **Swing:** 872 **Pitch:** 602 **Diff:** 270 **Result:** GO 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▼ 2 REK 0 ○ ○ 2 Outs REK RF [Crypto Zoology](/u/mile114) 1st AB / .235[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806015?1217?2056)


Mile114

532


UmpireDevilHernandez

Crypto up now with 2 outs in the second inning. They take a big hack at a hanging slider and belt it hard in to the outfield! The left and centre fielders are converging but they won't make it time as this peach of a gapper reaches all the way to the wall and Crypto takes second base with a stand up double! **Swing:** 532 **Pitch:** 503 **Diff:** 29 **Result:** 2B 2 outs, Runner on 2nd


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▼ 2 REK 0 ○ ○ 1 Out REK 2B [Larold](/u/TrickyTroy2) 1st AB / .278[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806014?1217?1153)


TrickyTroy2

What the fuck even is a Highlander… 169


UmpireDevilHernandez

A Highlander is one who dwells or hails from a highland, particularly the Scottish variety. Perhaps the most famous specimen is Connor McLeod. There's a rather good documentary about his life and work, titled, somewhat unoriginally, 'Highlander' Maybe you could get back to the dugout and give it a watch, educate yourself. **Swing:** 169 **Pitch:** 835 **Diff:** 334 **Result:** GO 2 outs, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▼ 2 REK 0 ○ ○ 0 Out REK C [Ded Tanson](/u/Sickboy2212) 1st AB / .357[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806013?1217?3070)


sickboy2212

469


UmpireDevilHernandez

Ded is dead after absolutely whiffing and striking out **Swing:** 469 **Pitch:** 944 **Diff:** 475 **Result:** K 1 out, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ● ▲ 2 REK 0 ○ ● 2 Outs HFX DH [Kilometers Straw](/u/NarwhalHorn) 1st AB / .412[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806012?3089?7033)


NarwhalHorn

937


UmpireDevilHernandez

The Halifax DH steps in now, looking for a hit to drive in the first run of the game. Unfortunately, Joey's got other ideas, lobbing 3 beautiful curveballs in a row and fooling Kilo into a bad swing every time. More like Designated Striker Outer, amiright?! **Swing:** 937 **Pitch:** 400 **Diff:** 463 **Result:** K 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ● ▲ 2 REK 0 ○ ● 1 Out HFX CF [Reese Worthington](/u/lakers4life1214) 1st AB / .400[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806011?3089?4007)


lakers4life1214

622


UmpireDevilHernandez

The centre fielder, Reese Worthington, in the box now with 2 runners on and 1 out as the Highlander try to apply some pressure early on. Reese sees a pitch they like and launches this one high in to air! That Reykjavik wind is still around though and this one will hold up and get caught just in front of the warning track in left. **Swing:** 622 **Pitch:** 849 **Diff:** 227 **Result:** FO 2 outs, Runners on 1st and 2nd


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▲ 2 REK 0 ○ ● 1 Out HFX RF [Joe Pidgeon](/u/AnAngryPidgeon) 1st AB / .333[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806010?3089?6011)


AnAngryPidgeon

I seem to attract the inning ending double plays recently so why not just hit another one? Swing: 499


UmpireDevilHernandez

Pfft, do I look like Santa Claus? A club DJ? A waiter? What I'm trying to say is, I don't take requests! Here, have a walk and get outta here! **Swing:** 499 **Pitch:** 349 **Diff:** 150 **Result:** BB 1 out, Runners on 1st and 2nd


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▲ 2 REK 0 ○ ● 0 Out HFX 1B [King Kruul](/u/Druidicdwarf) 1st AB / .000[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806009?3089?4000)


Druidicdwarf

Hello! Thank you for umping. Can I have a 7 please?


UmpireDevilHernandez

Hello King Kruul! You're welcome, it's a pretty fun thing to do. Now, with a runner on first base and nobody out Wheelers looks in for the sign, nods and delivers 3 fastballs, all up in the zone for strikes. By the third one, Kruul is timed up and sends it high and deep into the outfield! But the Reykjavik weather can be a cruel thing as the wind swirls and holds this ball inside the bounds of the fence. Homer tracks back, settles, makes a small jump and hauls this one in at the wall. **Swing:** 7 **Pitch:** 800 **Diff:** 207 **Result:** FO 1 out, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▲ 2 REK 0 ○ ○ 0 Out HFX 3B [Phillip Dunphy](/u/zaran_peer12) 1st AB / .222[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806008?3089?6019)


zaran_peer12

780


UmpireDevilHernandez

Dunphy steps up to the plate now to lead off the top of the second inning. Hoping to get something going here they take a hack at a 2-1 fastball up in the zone and make good contact! It's a low shot that skims the turf just to the left of the mound, Thor and Larold are both diving for it and oh no! It's slipped between them and the two fielders are left in a rather...*nice* tangle on the ground! Dunphy reaches first base and holds up there as the ball is collected in shallow centre field and thrown back in quickly. A lead off single for Halifax! **Swing:** 780 **Pitch:** 849 **Diff:** 69 **Result:** 1B 0 outs, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▼ 1 REK 0 ○ ● 1 Out REK SS [Thor Heyerdahl](/u/qomsday) 1st AB / .250[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806007?1217?3066)


qomsday

If I get a hit here you just got hit by the worst batter in the league 129


UmpireDevilHernandez

Congratulations!!! Your stats went up in one category! Oh you wanna know which one? Alrighty welp… your DP total has increased from 0 to 1! Now you can give an even better petition for being worst batter in the league **Swing:** 129 **Pitch:** 656 **Diff:** 473 **Result:** DP 3 outs, inning over


qomsday

Oh no


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▼ 1 REK 0 ○ ○ 1 Out REK 1B [Ura Irons](/u/Ocelot_Tuga) 1st AB / .167[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806006?1217?4044)


Ocelot_Tuga

720


UmpireDevilHernandez

After recording the first out with a flyball that looked like it might have been trouble, Johnny Dickshot uses a more cautious approach with Ura Irons at the plate. Unfortunately, the downside of nibbling is issuing a free pass here and there and Ura watches ball four sail over the top of the strike zone and takes their base on balls. **Swing:** 720 **Pitch:** 891 **Diff:** 171 **Result:** BB 1 out, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Johnny Dickshot on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▼ 1 REK 0 ○ ○ 0 Out REK CF [Homer Knocker](/u/CableCubed) 1st AB / .389[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806005?1217?6010)


CableCubed

Spoilers for a 12 year old Disney movie ahead: In Tangled (2010), at the emotional climax of the movie, Rapunzel, having her magical healing hair cut off by her newly found love Flynn Rider is left crying over the presumed death of her beloved. Singing the song she would sing to heal her false mother, Rapunzel cradles her love in her arms and a single tear falls onto his cheek. Through the powers granted by the magical flower that imbued her hair with its power, her tear is able to bring Flynn back and the two embrace as the ending of the movie plays out. This poses an interesting hypothetical: what all is Rapunzel able to do, in order to utilize her healing properties? As was seen in the movie, her hair, now cut short and devoid of its power, was the primary way of transferring the power of the flower. And as previously mentioned, a single one of her tears was able to cure a mortally wounded person. Was this due to the sheer emotional stress and intense feeling she was having at that moment that "supercharged" her tear with the healing power? I posit that ANY bodily fluid from Rapunzel could have this same effect. Flynn cuts his hand slicing open an apple? A little spit shine from Rapunzel and that cut is gone. Dont even get me started on the potential effects this could have on their marriage bed.... To lend more credibility to this theory, note that Rapunzel herself is never seriously injured in the movie. In fact, I do not believe she so much as scratches herself once. Could it be that her blood is so powerful it is literally preventing her from being damaged? Any small cut or abrasion immediately being washed away through the blood coursing through her body? If she donated blood, would the patient receiving the blood have the same powers? Granted they might not be aware of the power unless the song is sung but perhaps the blood carries that power inately? If Rapunzel is constantly singing the song to herself, could she be theoretically invincible? She could be the greatest warrior poet her kingdom has ever known! Please consider this as you go about the rest of your week. Bring it up with your coworkers and family and friends. I look forward to any insightful conversations this may prompt. Halifax wishes they were even half as contemplative over important issues as we are in here REK. Swing 69


UmpireDevilHernandez

I'll be sure to consider this new knowledge for the rest of my week. Thank god it's Friday, ya big nerd. **Swing:** 69 **Pitch:** 266 **Diff:** 197 **Result:** FO 1 out, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▲ 1 REK 0 ○ ● 2 Outs HFX C [Mike Litoris](/u/fai2k) 1st AB / .250[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806004?3089?6016)


fai2k

242


UmpireDevilHernandez

Halifax catcher Mike Litoris steps in now hoping to keep the inning going. Adopting the same patience as Kegs, they leave the bat on their shoulder for 5 pitches in a row. Unfortunately, 3 of them were strikes and Mike heads back to the dugout to grab his catcher gear as we head to the bottom of the inning. **Swing:** 242 **Pitch:** 800 **Diff:** 442 **Result:** K 3 outs, inning over


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▲ 1 REK 0 ○ ○ 2 Outs HFX LF [Kegs Mabry](/u/kegs_is_great) 1st AB / .273[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806003?3089?1098)


Kegs_is_Great

450


UmpireDevilHernandez

Kegs steps up now with 2 outs in the top of the 1st. Trying to get something going early they wait for the right pitch and when a 2-2 curveball crosses the plate in a hittable spot Kegs doesn't hesitate to poke it through the hole for a base hit! **Swing:** 450 **Pitch:** 548 **Diff:** 98 **Result:** 1B 2 outs, Runner on 1st


UmpireDevilHernandez

**Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▲ 1 REK 0 ○ ○ 1 Out HFX SS [Kenny Kawaguchi](/u/Therealslimcampbell) 1st AB / .154[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806002?3089?5021)


therealslimcampbell

380


UmpireDevilHernandez

I was going to make a joke about Kenny Kawaguchi striking out, like I had typed it all up. Along with the 420 joke. But my better judgement went, “Hey Devil Hernandez, let’s not say something really bad” and I’m glad I listened to it **Swing:** 380 **Pitch:** 960 **Diff:** 420 **Result:** K 2 outs, Bases Empty


UmpireDevilHernandez

Let's this party started! **Joey Wheeler on the mound** HFX 0 ○ ▲ 1 REK 0 ○ ○ 0 Out HFX 2B [Bill Stokes](/u/diepie316) 1st AB / .500[.](https://playbarcode/8080680806001?3089?7019)


diepie316

711


UmpireDevilHernandez

Bill has a dead even .500 Avg. I wonder how this is gonna end up. A: Walk. B: A hit. C: A better hit. *Jeopardy noise* Did you say… G for groundout? Then you’re correct! **Swing:** 711 **Pitch:** 435 **Diff:** 276 **Result:** GO 1 out, Bases Empty


CableCubed

I choose D for Ligma Balls