T O P
regular6drunk7

Doesn't matter. 14 year old me wouldn't listen.


FireFighterP55

**Me:** Please listen to me. **14 year old me:** plEaSe LiStEn tO MEE!?!


[deleted]

My 14 year old self would be freaked out some creepy old dude talked to him. WTH am I going to be able to say in 4 words that would possibly be of enough impact for him to trust the advice and remember it?


IjustCameForTheDrama

"Buy Bitcoin in 2010" Considering Bitcoin didn't even exist yet, I feel like when it suddenly did exist right around the same time, I would have been freaked out enough to buy as much as I could. Only problem being that I would have probably sold way too early. But at least I still have more money now.


Mkep

“Hold bitcoin till 2020”


therealrubberduckie

Probably the most accurate comment here


Paralthia

Hug your mum back


akdsjgh

This one cut deep. :(


BonetaBelle

Yup, mine would be “go hug your mom”.


Baileybmarie

Take your health seriously. I’m 26 with a long list of health complications that stem from type 1 diabetes I was diagnosed with at age 3. I wish that I had taken better care of myself from the beginning.


spastickyle

As a parent of a T1, that ain't your responsibility at 14. That's all on your parents. The goal of a T1 parent is to manage it as best you can so your child can emulate those habits as an adult. If they didn't demonstrate proper management when your were 14, that's not your fault at all.


Dexlexic

As a T1 myself who has wonderful parents who tried ever so hard to get me to go in the right direction, you’re wrong. While some of the responsibility does most certainly fall on the caretakers of the individual, the individual also needs to put forth effort. My parents tried so very very very hard to get me to check my blood, to eat properly and to properly take care of myself as a kid and a young teen, but they couldn’t just tie me down onto a bed and forced me to do what I was supposed to. Some of it rubbed off on me and I’m doing OK-ish now (in my mid 30’s now) but I made my own decisions to treat my body like shit throughout my teens, despite constant talks and reminders from my parents whilst it was happening. I would never dream of trying to place a single iota of blame on them for the issues I’m currently dealing with. If someone tried to lecture me now and tell me my parents should have done more/better, I’d probably tear them a new one about trying to lecture someone else on a disease that they know nothing or very little about. It’s something you deal with 24/7 365 and you inevitably get run down and make mistakes. To insinuate that a parent is a failure because they let their diabetic TEENAGER get away with not completely taking 100% awesome care of themselves in what is essentially a non-stop balancing/juggling act while also having to work and provide for a family is just plain stupid. As the old adage goes “you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink” Not trying to come across as rude or aggressive, that just struck a nerve with me.


Confident-Fee-6593

This is not on you. It's on your caretakers, managing type 1 diabetes is incredibly time consuming and exhausting and is NOT the responsibility of a child. I hope you're doing well now and if your insurance will pay for it get a tandem insulin pump with a dexcom g6 cgm to get your H1C at a great level.


Davulous

Don't smoke you dumbass


SirOk5108

Same thing I would tell her


SilvaMercer

Bipolar, anxiety, adhd, go doctor. It would save me 20 years of mental health problems I didn't understand.


Unitedgamers_123

Uh oh, that’s 5 words! You have just caused a rip in the fabric of the space-time continuum!


Big_Willis_Style

“Bad head, go doctor”


LouSputhole94

I’d be really worried about my first blowjob….


Dconnolly69

"Bipolar, anxiety, adhd, go do......" "go door?" "Go door!" "Ho door!" "HODOOR!!"


lobehold

"You have mental illness"


TheSuperperforator

That’s five words…. Your younger self would just hear „bipolar, anxiety, adhd, go“ which could be very confusing xD


Spartancoolcody

They’d think you’ve cursed them as one by one the disorders become apparent.


heathers1

Hang with the nerds


Common_Protection815

Go learn to weld As soon as I realized I love welding my life just seemed to take off and I have loved it ever since


-St_Ajora-

It's like painting but with metal. What's not to love?


Accomplished_Welder3

should I pursue this random generated username?


Common_Protection815

I would suggest giving it a try at least see if you like it and you can make good money anywhere in the world


Zonerdrone

It's them, not you. Spent 30 years in a toxic family thinking I was the crazy one who needed to change.


CrazyOrNotHereICome

Ugh. I feel this. When everyone around you is a an a-hole, logic tells you YOU are the problem.


ztatiz

Seriously, the number of times my inner voice told and tells me that I’m the common denominator in all of my problems, failures, disappointments…


Troll4everxdxd

Something similar happened to me, although not as bad as the OP. It was a shitty group of middle and high school "friends" who would randomly mock, belittle, exclude and insult me just as a means to size each other up. I blamed myself for a long time for being bothered by it, for not being able to mock them back, for not being able to pretend to laugh, for not being able to stand up for myself. Looking back at it, I did the best I could, the classroom as a whole was pretty hierarchical and bullying and being on a shitty group of friends was better for you socially than being alone. But ever since I finished school and started college, I slowly but surely cut contact with them. Now I barely speak with some of them once in a while, but nothing more.


Aurora_Albright

Don’t marry J—— A———-


Dos_Manitos

I'd be impressed if they could marry Jane Austen.


BubbhaJebus

Don't marry Jack Ass.


ATrayYou

Now I’m curious if you redacted this for the comment or if you’d leave it deliberately ambiguous for your 14yo self


Background_Egg1364

Stand up for yourself


Previous_Ad7725

Great advice


yergonnalikeme

DON'T FUCK IT UP You only have one life to live


Sam-Gunn

That would wreck me. Future me travels back in time and simply says "don't fuck it up". No specifics, nothing to help me figure out what I fucked up, etc.


yergonnalikeme

Ok Np Addendum, BUY AMAZON STOCK YUP Reason You'll be wealthy


IsopodBeginning6337

Call CPS on dad


altf4tsp

I wish I could have also said that


555Cats555

I hope your okay now...


ArcadianPilot

I hope that you and yours are safe and you have support. I know you did everything you could with the knowledge and power available to you at the time.


Empty_Owl1108

Daaamn, you ok now?


filetemyoung

"Stop being a dick." Reason: I was a dick as a kid. Didn't realize how much of a dick I was until later.


AceHeister

Your 14 y.o. self:lmao make me


xenophon57

They said four words but never said you couldn't kick that lil bitches ass


Pewpipoopoo

I made a substitute teacher who was trying to do her best cry and run out of the classroom in 9th grade. I wish I could go back and punch my young self in the face.


badtiming220

Fuck, I did the same in high school. I didn't even mean to, I thought we were just messing around. I hit a nerve without meaning to.


EHnter

I’m pretty sure many people have told you that, I doubt past you would listen to anyone.


filetemyoung

Oh, people definitely did. And yeah, I didn't listen. Ideally I'd also explain the benefits of not being a dick, but that's the best I could think of with a 4 word limit.


[deleted]

“you’re depressed, im sorry”


CrockyCroc

“Please take a shower” I had really bad hygiene issues.


Bragior

Oh yeah. In the same line, I would have said, "Go wash your face". I took showers often, but I often avoided washing my face in the morning, or even in the shower because I didn't like soap getting into my face. That didn't end well for me. Alternatively, "Brush your teeth often".


ryumxxn

You'll be alright, word. I was having suicidal thoughts at that age and before, and although I lost my dad at 15, there also came better times, right now ten years later I'm doing so much better, I'm glad I'm still here


goshdammitfromimgur

I am also glad you are still here.


DumbDayCamp

I'd just show up in some prosthetic scars and wounds, maybe an eye patch and crutches. Just tell them not to do something innocent like "Don't eat the grapes" or something. Make em think grapes ruined our life.


IsekaiedHoe

Giving yourself a trauma that never existed lmaoo


IsekaiedHoe

It gives the whole definition of "hating yourself" To the next level


SkrogedScourge

Wake up in a padded room in the future.


Pewpipoopoo

Self troll, nice.


SpicyDuckNugget

Buy Bitcoin learn coding


InsightfulDare

A better one would be “Sell Bitcoin (£)xxxxxx” It conveys that you need to buy Bitcoin now and continue to do so up until it reaches a certain value and which point you sell the whole lot.


JackSaysHello

Very hard to find a number that can fit into four words. I think something like "hold bitcoin six years" is best


derfischerx123

Works in German. Verkauf Bitcoin bei Dreiundsechszigtausend


throwaway16748w9191

You can just smack enough words together in german that you can tell him your life story tbh


Todd-The-Wraith

Yeah German is cheating. You can turn an entire paragraph into a single word.


InsightfulDare

Doesn’t need to be specific.. like “sell bitcoin Ten thousand”.. number depending on your own currency and the closest thousand under the all time high price.


scrumpx

Bitcoin reaches sixty thousand


how-puhqueliar

bitcoin sell OCT 21


jonovan

Bought Bitcoin 1/31/2009, sold 10/21/2009.


how-puhqueliar

see, i felt cheeky for writing '21' as a single word, but you just went whole-hog with it, huh? ETA: i didn't read the dates right, i thought you were doing another '4 words' type post with the valley and peak dates lmao


Dumb_Dick_Sandwich

Ok sold on October 21st!


Babbles-82

Don’t buy bitcoin. They were free in the early days, just run the program on any crappy computer.


qqqxfk

You mean mining?


old_righty

For the cost of a pc with a decent video card, early days you probably could have bought thousands or tens of thousands of btc.


sopunny

If you got in on the ground floor, you could mine with a cpu


avelak

Hell, there were faucets that just gave you like 5 per day


jminc420

With buy bitcoin also hold them in the wallet is well.


serabatsur

Take care of yourself.


snegluf

You have autism, whee (I say whee as I disappear)


loki_dd

Way to freak your younger self out. You'll think you were visited by the autism fairy.


PixelOrange

I was mindlessly scrolling through these comments and thinking "oh yeah, this one or that one is smart" and then I see your comment. It took a minute to formulate the visual in my head of a kid being like "what the fuck, why did a fairy just give me autism?" Thanks for the laugh.


mustermm

I also had the Asutism but never really discover that on time.


reddandy26

They're called panick attacks


snegluf

This one right here


xfalinex

I was told that exact same thing by my therapist just recently, used to think the feeling was just a normal adrenaline rush that people get


reddandy26

Took me a while to figure them out. I've had them under control (mostly) for the past few years but talking about it in therapy I figured out I've had them since I was a kid, earliest I remember is age 6 or so... I also thought they were normal.


xfalinex

Exact same situation here; I described how I’d get an ‘adrenaline rush’ in certain situations and they said ‘That’s a panic attack, not an adrenaline rush.’ And I just went ‘Oh.’ The moment of realisation hits like a truck. When you think back to all the times they happened and how it was actually a trauma response… yeah. It’s good that we know now and can gain better control over the situation when we begin to feel one coming. I’m glad to hear you have yours mostly under control :) that’s great progress


NoAnybody7232

Same idea, but "It's called Sleep Paralysis." or "Learn to manage ADHD" Neither would help because I grew up in the deep south where they didn't believe that mental health issues existed.


BasicLibertarian

Actin funny? That’s a paddlin. Questioning the system? That’s a paddlin.


Odd-Turnip-2019

Paddlin the school canoe? Ooh you'd better believe that's a paddlin


HippopotamusGlow

You are not fat.


Mediocre_Advisor3416

Me believing I was fat led me to gain so much weight. I wish I could weigh 160 again lol, I was barely chubby


abandiera

Me too!! I’d do anything to be 160 again!


AdditionalCarpet5075

Yes!! I spent so many years hearing that only to look back and realize - no. I was normally sized. But it caused so much mental harm over many many years


BigBlackNigaBallz

Save your money.. please.


CaptainCacoethes

Buy bitcoin, 60k sell


undefeated_leftover

Give up on her.


BexYouSee

Oooh username. You ok?


Solid-Table

Nah it was character building


Productive1990

Dont open that door


jbreddick22

You're smart. Aim higher.


yash_chem

you are smart. aim


brannon1987

Hi, you aim smart


Methionylth

Smart aim, you’re high.


LJack49

Leave home at 18


Woodnote_

I left home literally the day I turned 18. Packed up my car, left with only $100 and drove to Seattle. Called my parents when I got there and told them I’m never coming back. Spent the next year or so mostly homeless until I got on my feet but I kept my promise and never went back. 22 years later and it was the best decision young me ever made and I’d go through it all again.


LJack49

Wish I had your courage


[deleted]

Pre menstrual dysmorphic disorder. Lol.


ShrimpBisque

"You're autistic. Get diagnosed." Seriously, though, I would have had such a more manageable time if the people in charge of my mental health in school would have given me a proper diagnosis instead of just thinking I was an unstable pain in the ass.


Adventurous-Fig-42

I’m 29 and just figured out I’m autistic.. I hate how long I have misunderstood life with occasional breaks of clarity


lysergicDildo

Fuck drugs, brush teeth


libertyprivate

Instructions unclear, dick stuck in a bong


sellingmagic

Fuck, Drugs, Brush Teeth


Dalolfish

"Invest in Apple stock" I was 14 in the early '90s


BigBenson1994

Younger self decides to take all savings and invest in *apple sauce?*


DoubleSoupVerified

Wear a fucking condom


brannon1987

There are condoms for other uses than fucking? TIL


ATrayYou

Umm yeah, everyone has those in a drawer somewhere, they come free with your Wii


drifting_drifblim

It will be ok


aibaDD13

I believe in you


poopydoopysubway

Bulimia wasnt worth it


AdhesivenessFirm9259

It will be okay.


Particular_Towel278

You are loved man


mlachick

You're worthy of love.


Anneshirley13

This too shall pass


Kylo-The-Optimist

Pick a better major


[deleted]

Psych ward now, bitch.


Over_rated_lemon

Live, it gets better.


ninjoid

Don't date Firstname Lastname. Because my life would have been completely different and infinitely better had I never met them.


a2j89

Ask (crush’s name) out, bro (Not about to drop her name on here, she might be on here)


cruzt1845

respect


soda_cookie

Buy tech stock


flunkyclaus

Still got space for a "please", "now" or "bitch".


roobadly

#you are not gay


SomeOtherNeb

"You mean those guys on Xbox Live are wrong?"


SpruceShrub

I spent so many years questioning only to realise I tick all the boxes except sexual attraction towards the same sex


Administrative_Fox74

Well this is close to mine. But i will tell myself i am bisexual and not a sin.


Both_Cockroach1402

Thats 7 words you now get no words


papatim

Suck dick be happy?


twinstars19_

Play school, not football


dve3413

Play the sport and try to be take some training of that sport is well.


Shirojime

Learn more skills, idiot For real ​ But for fun Death By Snu Snu


Heisenberg9919

friendships don’t last forever


Available-Camera8691

Do. Not. Try. Heroin.


TangeloBetter1094

It will get better.


I_RascaL_I

Don't take those drugs!


smokedmeatfish

Take these drugs instead!


Name-Saibuu

That cracked me up, thank you


Pioneer-Dwelling72

Stay away from Stepdad.


GrieferBeefer

I hope u are doing better now


Pioneer-Dwelling72

Most definitely! Thank you.


WhatIsThisWhiteStuff

"Look at them shoes" I'd like to imagine when he reaches the age I am now he'd come to a realization and laugh.


swaggysalamander

Don’t starve yourself dumbass


KJ_Kitsuneko

Get some education, idiot


snogweasel

Learn to use Naloxone


Schezzi

It will be okay.


10secondmessage

When sick doctor stupid!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Lobsterbib

Go to therapy now


PurpleWhatevs

Invest Netflix Tesla Amazon


Round-Captain5548

Do ALL the things!!


rhedrhover

See doctor. Get Concerta. So I'm not 43 before I can say Fuck ADD, thats why.


bernieevans

if you were 43 when you got on concerta, because that was really young age.


StupidOldAndFat

Booze isn’t the answer.


vova3379

Infact booze will chew up all the money from your wallet here.


Exotic_Ad_409

Get some help NOW


kegs444

RUN AWAY FROM HIM


how-puhqueliar

You're The Man Nowdog


Fair-Huckleberry-162

Hey man, nice butt.


LowTierStudent

Go to the gym


Bizonian

Rock on handsome dude!


TrumpedUpStupidity

Be happy. Try. Kindness.


Salt_Instruction6756

"Take a deep breath" Because life gonna get HARDER...


MrFunnyMoustache

Because this hypothetical question limits the answer to 4 words, I should try to be efficient. "Unwise" while pointing at the direction of parents room with one hand to tell young me to not think our parents give good advice or wisdom, and at the same time, point at a toy car with the other hand to indicate that car ownership is unwise. "Exercise" while pointing at my smiling face to indicate a positive outcome from starting to exercise. It may sound obvious, but younger me knew it and still didn't do it because of many bad reasons. "Invest" pointing at the computer with one hand to indicate that it would be wise to financially invest in tech companies, and at the notebooks with the other hand to indicate that it is best to invest in studies. "Move" pointing at a world map, hopefully getting other me to move to another country sooner. This way, I would be giving younger me two traps to avoid, and four positive things to do for a better life.


devlin1888

14 year old me would be confused as fuck with this haha


[deleted]

YOU EAT THAT HORSE.


[deleted]

Kathy is a whore


MissKellyBee91

Fucking Kathy!


Whole_Ad3427

Dad dies in 2002. 💔


Different-Speaker670

Uhh that changes everything. I wouldn’t wanna hear that


KissItOnTheMouth

Mom dies in 2017 I feel you. Sorry to be in the club with you.


CSMDoesNotHack

dont date over quarantine


marijjuani

“Be good to Vivian”


79Binder

Microsoft. Apple. Gold. Bitcoin.


AssAaasin

without context you will be hella confused.


dra704

If i have to pick one here then i will certainly pick the bitcoin.


kjahdhf

Study for school bitch


maracujaja

do not attempt suicid


Catzrjoy

Don't ever get married


hannamarinsgrandma

Do better in school. Or Learn how to drive. Didn’t take high school seriously at all and it sort of progressed into college for a bit and had an impact on my career trajectory that I’m still trying to correct. Had the opportunity to begin driver’s Ed when I was 14 turning 15 but didn’t see the point. So instead of my mom only spending a few hundred dollars, I ended up spending well over a thousand learning to drive at age 23 because I didn’t have anyone available who was willing to teach me or let me use their car so I had to find a driving school for adults.


Inside_Ad_8708

you're infact very gay


CarpeShine

Invest in Sanitizer….. bitch.


Content_Future_5996

Pinkman, is that you dude?


1punman_

It all works out In the end the only thing holding me back was my own fear of failure. And putting myself out there usually led to good things for me


Ramen_FSM

Punch them back.... hero 💕


Striz-zetch

Don't join that gang