T O P
  • By -

killbillthereforme

Inspect the sheets thoroughly


Raptoracct

Last time I was in a hotel, I didn’t do this and by the time I got into bed at midnight I started freaking out because thought I felt bugs crawling on me. Turned on the light, inspected the sheets. Nope. Pubes and crumbs. Too tired to find a new hotel, I went downstairs and asked for a clean set of sheets, remade the bed, and slept like shit. Was gonna shower but the bathroom made me feel like I’d end up dirtier. I still don’t like ya Indiana. Edit: tfw you get 1k+ upvotes on your alt reddit account 😅🤦🏻‍♀️


Locha6

Unrelated to the sheets but stayed in a motel in Colorado with two friends who were brothers … we showed up late as hell just looking for a place to crash while on a road trip…. First thing: the woman at the desk saw three of us and said “we only got two bed rooms” we said “oh well that’s ok these two are brothers and can sleep in the same bed, no big deal.” She then asked “smoking or non?” We said “smoking please” as the two of them were smokers. She THEN said “we only got three bed rooms for smokers.” We were perplexed as she had literally JUST said they only had two bed rooms but we just said “great! We’ll take it.” The room was typical for a motel but cleaner than we expected. Quite nice to be honest …. We all slept well but the next day I went to take a shower and to my surprise the shower did not work… you could only take a bath. I thought “oh well a bath sounds kind of nice anyways.” Only to realize that the thing to close the tub off so you could fill it did not work either … I had to take the weirdest bath I’ve ever taken … just splashing water onto myself sitting in a tub that wouldn’t fill, with a shower that wouldn’t turn on … Still couldn’t be TOO upset as we were expecting it to be a hell hole and it turned into a pretty decent room with a shitty tub lol.


Castlefree43

It sounds weird but you can always just plug the drain with toilet paper or tissues. It would probably be best to use a wash cloth or hand towel if it doesn't have a grate over the drain preventing the paper from getting into the pipes.


Swimming-Ad5561

Fill up the sink with ice and beers


charizard_72

As a former housekeeper at a resort hotel, I’m dying inside at some of you savages.


Spaghetti-Bruv

Absolutely. As a current housekeeper some of these comments drive me insane.


Dirges2984

Check the sheets for bugs.


MaritimeOliver

The absolute FIRST thing I do is leave my luggage at the door and check under the fitted sheets for bed bugs. I had a former coworker bring them home from a hotel, cost him a FORTUNE too get rid of them.


MyPostHas

UNDER the fitted sheets? I’m not well versed in checking for bed bugs but should you actually strip the entire bed to check?


E404_User_Not_Found

Lift all the sheets down to the mattress. Then check the opposite side of the mattress. If you don’t see bugs you might see little bloodstains from previously bitten guests. If the hotel believes they removed all the bed bugs and could salvage the mattress they might just flip it over. If the bed frame is wooden, you’ll also want to check in the crevasses in the wood, any holes, and around the joints. It seems over the top, and I’m sure most people would rather not stress over it and trust the hotel. I don’t blame those people, tbh. Your chance of actually getting bed bugs is super rare and any hotel that cares about staying in business take them _very seriously_. That said, if you are the unfortunate one to get them your wallet, and sanity, will thank you for checking before bringing them home. Tip: if you do find bed bugs alert the hotel and ask for your luggage to be sanitized even if you only spent a few minutes in the room. It only takes one to spread. Hotels will have “hot boxes” they place your stuff in that heats up to a temperature that will kill off all the bugs. Source: worked in a 700 room destination hotel for 6 years.


Paulpaps

I'll never not upvote info for bed bug spotting. I had them years ago for around 6 months, got them from a friends house which was infested, probably after his bro came back from slumming it in Cambodia. They are EVIL litlle bastards that get into your fucking head. Anytime I get an itchy ankle I panic and have to search my bed, they really do a number on you. I can even remember the unique earthy smell they have when you kill one. Tbh, after that all other insects I stopped hating as much. House Flies are annoying, but rare and only an annoyance, not full on psychological warfare that bed bugs are.


FallenInHoops

I lived in a house with an infestation after rmy roommates brought the back from NYC. That was in 2009 and I *still* militantly check the mattress every time I change the sheets. I also found ONE shortly after I moved into my current apartment. Chances are my ex or I picked it up on the subway, or it came from our old neighbours who'd had them. I spotted it making its way across the couch cushions and captured it with scotch tape as proof. Luckily my super took it very seriously and merced the damn place to hell within 48 hours. I've seen neither hide nor hair (nor blood spot) in nearly two years, but that shit definitely re-upped my anxiety.


Chaty100

My college house had an infestation that was fucking horrible. I spent SO much time removing them and not sleeping in my own bed because of them. They really fucked up my head while I was dealing with them. Same as you, I found 3 on a pillow after I moved back into my parents house. Immediately bagged and threw the pillow away and called an exterminater. He examined EVERYTHING, no sign of them. I got so damn lucky that those were the only ones. Been bed bug free ever since but I have nightmares. Evil little fuckers.


FallenInHoops

I had the same thing happen with there being no sign of them anywhere else in my current place when the inspector came. I'm still very, very glad I caught the one I found though, who knows if it would have laid eggs already. I did have an absolute panic when I found *something* I couldn't identify that was the same shape, but itty bitty, and I ended up tossing my couch because of it. I thought they were babies. My poor ex came home from work to find me manicly bagging couch cushions and demanding he help me remove it immediately. It turns out they were something called clover mites, which smoosh red, not helping at all with the panic at the time. I like to think I'm usually pretty reasonable and considered in my actions, but anything related to bed bugs just tosses that out the window.


appathepupper

Yeah my parents house had a really bad infestation right after I graduated university. I was studying for my board exams, my parents were visiting family in Europe (my mom had already been gone a month, my dad had left I think maybe a week prior). Since they were gone, I was sleeping in the big bed. I slept in there two nights. The second night my bf woke me up (or maybe I woke him up?) And I screamed bloody murder. It was like a horror movie. They were ALL over the sheets. I cried. We both tore off all our clothes and the sheets in the middle of the night and took a super long scalding shower. Slept on the leather couch(tried to sleep). I didn't have time to decontaminate or do anything to treat them aside from the sheets since I had my exams. They were still there in the morning. They were in all the crevices of that bed and the mattess. Still have no idea where they got it, or how it got so bad without my parents getting any bites, and also changing the sheets regularly. I still have flashbacks to that terrible night. It was over a year before I was comfortable in my parents house. I meticulously check any hotel room. I also spot check my own bed every once in a while, and I invest in a bedbug matress protector. Once you experience this shit it really fucks with you.


kingpinkatya

Your parents were being bit. They just didn't have an allergic reaction. Thats how the population grew so big.


Paulpaps

Oh god, if I saw just one I'd have assumed that meant more. I hope we never see any of them again!


FallenInHoops

Knock every available piece of wood! May your sleep never be interrupted by the demon bugs again.


sgp1986

Plus they're so smug, everything's a joke to a bed bug


SnooBananas7856

There's that smudgeness.


bejammn001

It really is psychological bro. They're basically harmless and don't spread disease... But good God they can make you go mental. Remember to flip up seams on mattresses to see if they're under.


Shanman150

I had them during my masters program, it's intense. Every movement of your leg hairs has you thinking it's a bedbug, you wake up in the middle of the night panicking that you felt one, and you can't even regularly sleep on your couch or something because *they will move to get you*. When I had bedbugs, I would sleep on my couch once a week to give my mind a break, but the rest of the time I'd have to sleep in a known infested bed. Fortunately I'm pretty sure I only had a few, since I only caught one every 10 days or so. Worst part is that when you're finished spraying, bugbombing, toasting your clothes and everything, the only way to know if you got them all is to wait to see if one comes back. You can't have guests over, either, which sucks.


Charleypieohwhy

This whole thread is making me itch


Pajamas7891

Serious question, can you rest easy after not spotting anything? My paranoia is extreme and it’s kind of ruined hotels for me. Edit: I should have specified no horror stories; looking to get better about this, not worse :/


OddEye

It's actually not just hotels. The exterminator told me that I might've caught one from the airport (I stayed with family when I was on my trip) and that it's especially common there since people are coming and going from all over. That's why whenever I'm flying, I ensure all my zippers are closed as tight as possible and then slam my luggage on the ground in the chance that any are holding on to the sides.


Sinehmatic

I'm chuckling at the image of someone violently spiking their luggage into the ground


notclientfacing

I THREW IT ON THE GROUND I DON'T WANT YOUR BEDBUGS, MAAAAAAN


yorfavoritelilrascal

I'm chuckling at the image of a bedbug holding on for dear life to the side of luggage that someone's violently spiking into the ground.


BoMbSqUAdbrigaDe

Ex exterminator here. Movie theatres are the worst. Dark, cold and tons of people to spread them around.


boatsnprose

Thanks but I hate you now.


FlamingoDingus

Eat pizza in bed naked while watching cable tv. LPT: when traveling solo, always pick a room with two beds. That way you have an eating bed and a sleeping bed. It’s the closest we’ll get to royalty, folks.


Pasqwali

Your tip is also valid when traveling with a sexual partner. One bed for clean activities, one bed for dirty activities.


Fearless-Celery

I've never known anyone besides myself to have the eating bed strategy. It is the ideal way to stay in hotels alone. Bravo.


swamikrish

Use that white hand towel as a bath mat


jeeremyclarkson

I make a trail of towels from the door to the shower if I'm anywhere near a beach. I don't like tracking sand everywhere. Also the carpet is filthy.


MisanthropeX

It *is* coarse, rough and gets everywhere.


Juno_Malone

Sounds like you don't like sand


retailmonkey

and not just the sand but the women and the children too.


orbisonitrum

In other words, the sand people?


Mikey_B

I don't think you're allowed to use that term


khinzaw

Sorry, Sandy Tatooinians. Wait.


dubblehead

Usually there’s a towel on the side of the tub or on a towel rack, specifically meant to be laid down as a shower rug. Edit: even at the cheap hotels. I traveled for work, and wasn’t given much for hotels. So I had to stretch them Pennie’s


cheezemeister_x

> Usually there’s a towel on the side of the tub It's not a towel meant to be used as a bath mat. It *is* a bath mat.


Snoo74401

The one they lay out on the tub? That is actually supposed to be used as a bath mat.


Pond-James-Pond

Throw my towels on the floor without fear of reprisal.


LadyAppleman

Tolerate a bunch of loud strangers galloping down the halls at 3 am.


Liberteer30

Awful to deal with at home..especially if you live alone.


Profound_RK800

When you hear kids running down the hall but you live alone


Stealfur

When the child knocks on your window and asks you to come out and play but you like in a 6th floor apartment without balconies.


PhilipSeymourCoffin

Tolerate sleeping in a bed where I know hundreds of men have ejaculated in.


EsIstNichtAlt

You take after your mom.


Thinkingaboutstuff2

Solid burn


fordprecept

Or sitting in a chair that hundreds have men have ejaculated in. Or touching a remote that hundreds of men have ejaculated on. Or walking across a carpet full of cum stains from hundreds of men who have ejaculated.


SteveMcQueef81

I don't typically steal my own soap


madogvelkor

I have a travel kit that has like a dozen different soaps and mini shampoos in it from hotels over the past decade. I never actually use them because every time I go somewhere they have stuff there, which I also steal.


DrinkLogical182

The cost of the soaps are included in your rate. So technically when you check out, you're paying for them.


partanimal

You can take the salt and pepper, but NOT the shakers.


garrettj100

Go home, Ross. You're drunk. On maple candy.


sheherselfandher

But I want... I want the pinecones!


CupcakesAreMiniCakes

Many homeless shelters accept donations of travel toiletries Edit: thanks for the award!


AdderallForLunch

I set up a donation program for all of our old towels, sheets and any food/toiletries we can't use. They go to homeless/DV shelters. Its kinda cool. since we're a luxury resort we have to toss anything that doesn't look basically new. They get some good shit lol


madogvelkor

Good idea, thanks!


grannybubbles

It's not stealing, they're yours when you pay for the room. Unless maybe you're wandering into random hotel rooms and taking soap...


leftfootnofoot

or taking handfuls from cleaning carts...


WinstonChurchillin

Use all the towels.


Fantastic-Ad-3299

Makes sense. They’re all washed after your stay anyway, so why not use them all?


AllisonWunderlund

Eat in bed


SpeckleLippedTrout

Yup especially if I have 2 queen beds- one for eating one for sleeping. So luxurious. Also, stack all the pillows around me like a fort for sleeping.


mellowyfellowy

Never thought of eating on the sex bed. Woah


WestleyThe

Lol yeah that’s what I was thinking. There’s the sex bed and then the bed we use


lhalstead1113

Nobody to sex with so I have an eating bed


ebimbib

The eating bed is for pounding off as well.


LazyLinuxAdmin

Worry that someone peed in: 1. The coffee maker 2. The Iron 3. The Bed 4. The Refigerator 5. ... I have trust issues


burn-it-all-

I just assume someone jerked off in the coffee maker. Now I'll also assume someone peed in it too. Thanks. One time pretty recently I had to get up too early to get lobby coffee so I made the jerk off room coffee. Fuck that. Never again. All I could imagine was cum floating in my cup. I started dry heaving and threw it out. Blech!


BillOfArimathea

Maybe nobody peed in it, but the coffee maker is universally disgusting. Try running just regular water through it once before brewing coffee - I usually find it barfs out a lot of dust, dead bug parts, other particulate funstuff.


jrrfolkien

That's flavoring


NotLegitMustQuit

I shouldn't read this thread. I'm a hotel manager.


Advanced_Union6240

What are some horror stories from bad clients you've encountered?


Ac1dfreak

/r/TalesFromTheFrontDesk


NotLegitMustQuit

There are a bunch. I've had a few different people with schizophrenia stay that do some crazy things. These include ripping cables out of the wall and claiming people are outside their 4th floor window staring at them. I've had all sorts of drugs and drug related items left in the rooms. I've had a regular guest leave a cock ring and ask me to hang onto it until he returns. So much fun stuff.


[deleted]

My wife works front desk at a hotel. They’ve found Dildos, Guns and all sorts of strange shit. That you wouldn’t think people would just forget.


fatimus_prime

I’m a Security Manager for three Hotel/Casinos in Las Vegas. The things we’ve picked up as lost & found are wild.


du_hund_du

To be fair, those can be quite expensive, esp if they're good quality.


Wisc_Bacon

I felt horrible losing my $45 ring, but fuck calling the hotel to save it.


ThatITguy2015

My advice? Wash the curtains. People are animals.


NotLegitMustQuit

Fortunately, we use roller shades. But still great advice.


featureenvy

Watch TV. I don't have cable at home so sometimes I'll flip on cartoon network and just watch it the whole time while doing other stuff. Edit: holy shit I'm delighted so many people relate


PunkRockMakesMeSmile

Go right to the Forensic Files station


pollodustino

Forensic Files, and that awesome tree house show.


The_Muznick

I've put on Cartoon Network in a hotel room as background noise to fall asleep to, only to wake up at 5 am to Inuyasha as I go to take a leak.


crayongrrl

Watching a We Bare Bears marathon was the best part of my trip to an all inclusive in Mexico!


cxwxo

This marathon saved my honeymoon. I was sick with the stomach flu and bed bound our whole trip. Cartoon Network was the only English station. We Bare Bears brought me sanity.


RenownedDumbass

And then be reminded why cable TV is awful and why you don't pay for it at home. So. Many. ADS.


undercoverhippie

Same, especially HGTV.


lordduzzy

A surprising amount of Diner Drive-ins and Dives for me.


houseofreturn

Best memory I have is me and my best friend watching DDD in our hotel room on New Year’s Eve, pretty damn tipsy, and then watching Guy Fieri go into the restaurant we had *just* eaten at hours earlier. It was such a trip and we got so hyped. “YOOOO THATS THE CHICKEN DISH I GOT!! GUY AND I HAVE HAD THE SAME FOOD!!!” “oMG THERES THE TABLE WE SAT AT!!”


mysextherapy

Leave dirty towels on the floor. Don’t make the bed. Take forever in the shower. Never take out the trash. You know….hooligan shit.


zippe6

Wipe the spots off of the mirror Don't leave my keys in the door I never put wet towels on the floor anymore


theassassintherapist

Enjoy the view of a foreign downtown skyline


jaywhi255

Crank up the AC and check my view are the first things I do when I set my luggage down.


Override9636

Hotel AC just hits different


Napol3onS0l0

A good nap with that crisp cool air blowing around. The gentle whir of the fan and the hum of the compressor. Kick a leg out to ensure proper temperature regulation. Blinds drawn. God damn I love a good hotel nap.


goistreddit

Walk around naked and leave the tv on in the background (I don't have cable at home)


leoliontheking

I always leave the tv on too! I guess that’s why. No cable at home for years now


Ccracked

I always leave the TV on for my cat. I work nights, and occasionally have to stay out overlong. So I leave the TV playing so Tootie isn't left in silence.


superbuttpiss

My big ole pup throws a fit in our living room and chews on stuff if we leave any lights or noise on except for the heater. Seriously. If we leave one lamp on she will scratch at the door or chew on something until we turn it off. Never had an animal like that but she is very particular about her beauty sleep. I even tuck her in. [But, I have to make sure shes asleep before I go](https://imgur.com/a/tgSLhAk)


Daikataro

You don't walk around naked at your own home? Family present I assume?


GingeAndJuice

I don't know if they consider it much of a present, but a gift is a gift, I suppose..


pineappledaddy

Turn the AC all the way up. I'm not doing that shit at home cause I pay the bills.


ludicrouspeed

It’s all about cranking up the AC and using a blanket to sleep in the middle of summer. Something I’ll never do at home.


partypartea

Now that I've had a few job upgrades and made it to my 30s I set my AC to 68. Fuck it. I've earned it.


KidFresh71

I used to stay at a downtown Four Seasons hotel 60-90 days per year, for work. Every day, like a ritual, I would collect the high end soaps, lotion, q-tips, sewing kit, and unused shampoo & conditioner. By the end of the stay, I would have a huge box of high end L’occitane toiletries, which I would donate to the local Women’s shelter.


PalmTreePhilosophy

So you're Robin Hood?


richbayliss

Nah, just Robin the Four Seasons 🤩


Layahz

Reddit people are restoring my faith in humanity today. Such a kind and slightly genius idea. A woman’s shelter can be such a depressing step through life for many and they were able to have a little bit of luxury. On another subreddit today someones dog ate a sponge and they were otw to the vet to possibly put dog down because they did not have the $$. They asked for prayers but subreddit users raised the funds to pay for over half the dogs needed surgery in just a few hours.


paola_-_

go around naked and use towels as carpets


[deleted]

Take baths. I don't have a bathtub at home.


saintofhate

First and only time my mum used a bath bomb was when we were in a hotel because we've never had a tub deep enough to do it. She loved it.


dracomundos

Actually sleep


VoDoka

I do like hotels, but there hardly is a place at which I sleep worse somehow.


RVelts

I’ve read that the human body takes a night or two to “trust” a new location and allow you as deep of a sleep as at “home”. So if you often change hotels every few nights or go on short trips, this can happen. Apparently people who travel a lot will often stay at the same hotel and request the same room type every time so this doesn’t affect them. Likely a “your mileage may vary” thing.


MrChilliBean

This is probably why I always disliked sleepovers as a kid. I loved the "over" part, but hated the "sleep" part. We'd hang out all night, play games, watch movies, just have a great time. Then my friend would fall asleep and I would just lie there awake, tossing and turning, never able to get comfortable. Never got the hype behind sleepovers.


senorstupid

The hype was because after you woke up you would just keep the party going till you got picked up. Its also fun to stay at other kids houses especially when your friends families had nicer houses/rooms/basements to hang out in.


charmorris4236

And better snacks


pm_me_ur_th0ng_gurl

You're did it wrong. You're not supposed to sleep at sleepovers.


seanofkelley

Jump on the bed. I am 40 years old and I launch myself onto every bed at every hotel room I stay at.


malicestar

When he walked into his first hotel room, I told my 3 year old "the first rule of hotels is, you are allowed to jump on the bed" One of the brightest smiles I've ever seen


kingofbadhabits

My mom told me the exact same thing once. 30 seconds later I broke the light hanging from the ceiling with my head. I was not allowed to jump on the beds anymore.


KittySucks69

I had a friend who got a severe concussion when he was 6, by jumping on a hotel bed, losing his balance, and hitting his head on the night table. On the first day of a 4-day vacation. Guess who got blamed for fucking up their time at the beach?


GayAlienFarmer

Somebody's parents never read 5 Little Monkeys.


mule_trane

I tell my 2 boys that they can jump on the beds for 10 minutes and that's it. I start the timer on my phone and watch them go crazy. I even encourage them to keep going if they're getting tired before the alarm sounds. It gets it out of their system and tires them out before we go to the pool


[deleted]

I was looking for this one. It’s the best feeling. Dude I’m 51 and I do that! Granted it’s followed by a quick inventory to see what muscle I probably just pulled and then of course a nap. But still…


weirdcabbage

That's the spirit, my man


ValkyrieVirtuoso

Not me but guests when I worked the front desk at an extended stay hotel. I’ve seen a hotel room quite literally trashed. There was trash ALL OVER that room; the floor was covered, somehow it was hanging on walls, etc. The manager wanted us to see how bad it was so we walked over to the room. The looks on the faces of the housekeepers having to clean it were total and utter despair. I’ll never forget them. So yeah, maybe don’t be a dick in your hotel room because ultimately it’s highly underpaid housekeepers, who tend to be the sweetest ladies by the way, have to clean up after you. Just a thought.


Koffeepotx

I used to be a stewardess on a cheap cruise ship (a cleaning job, mostly). Sometimes we would have guests who came on board mainly to binge drink the cheap alcohol we sell in the taxfree shop and just get weird and wasted. When on cabin cleaning duty I had a list of rooms to clean and another list where I was supposed to just change the towels, take out the trash and otherwise freshen up their cabins. One cabin on the tidy-up-list was WRECKED. Absolutely disgusting. There was beer and soda cans everywhere, food leftovers on the floor and table, used snuff everywhere (very popular tobacco product in Scandinavia), and there were sticky pools of beer and soda on the carpet floor, the walls and even the fucking ceiling. The bathroom was covered in hair and vomit. I had to call my manager who took out all their luggage, kicked the guests off the ship with a fine. Took me forever to clean (remember it was on the tidy-up-list, so it was only supposed to take a couple of minutes). Although this was my worst experience with a guest cabin, it was in no way an uncommon experience to see cabins literally trashed like that. Of course, I also had lovely guests who made my job a great place to be. But yeah I agree, please be nice to the staff Edit: wow thanks for the award! I'm new to Reddit so this almost made me cry lol, I need a hobby apparently


matike

Write “get out” with a thin layer of soap on the mirror in the bathroom, so when the next person uses the shower and it fogs up they think there’s a poltergeist in there with them.


flashmedallion

I *like* this. I think I'd go with 'NOT ALONE'


Incman

"LOOKING GOOD :)"


mpete98

NICE COCK


DogadonsLavapool

Ya see, this one would trip me up because it seems positive and creepy at the same time


SanibelMan

"WE KNOW WHAT YOU DID"


Ralph--Hinkley

HELP ME Edit: Written backwards.


[deleted]

[удалено]


FLBaisa

You seem to basically live in the set of Schitts Creek


zlllakamii

well i don’t usually have to fight with an electronic key card for 20 minutes at my house


AdamOnePlus

Swim in an indoor pool. I refuse to go to a hotel without an indoor pool. I love the stink of chlorine filling the room. Associated with some really great memories.


[deleted]

[удалено]


graydingo77

Fuck my wife


SuchBrightness

Why not at home though?


andi00

Probably because of kids or the stress and doldrums of daily life... Speaking from my own experience.


giga

This guy dads


housemuncher

Eat a club sandwich. How can something be so ordinary but so elaborate at the same time? And so universal on every room service menu in the world?


theredditforwork

How do you feel about frilly toothpicks?


Dahaole

I'm for 'em!


sordidcandles

Look for hidden cameras. Check the peephole to make sure it hasn’t been reversed. Check the sheets closely.


[deleted]

Ever find a camera?


sordidcandles

Luckily no! Did find $400 in a Bible once though 😅 Just paranoid as a woman who travels alone, I’ve heard too many horror stories. Especially about the peepholes being flipped around.


cashformoldd

Was staying at a hotel with a friend for a weekend trip once and he found a crisp $100 bill in our room’s Bible. Now I always check whenever I get a hotel.


sordidcandles

Yes yes yes! Always check the Bibles and drawers folks 🤠


koi88

Who puts money in a hotel bible?


sordidcandles

Good question. That’s kinda where your imagination gets to run wild. Helps you fill the alone time! My guess is paranoid elderly folks, mostly.


uhmnopenotreally

paying of the sins they comitted in said hotel room.


sordidcandles

…on second thought don’t touch the Bible money, folks


shableep

Might be a way to get people to read the Bible. Word gets around there's money in the Bible in the hotel room, you might get more people to open it up and take a look. But that might not work out in their favor depending on where you open up the bible to.


madogvelkor

Now I wonder if someone hid their cash there and forgot it or if some eccentric religious person wanted to reward someone for reading the bible....


[deleted]

[удалено]


mgt15

Fill an ice bucket with ice from a machine, then proceed to sit on the bed and eat said ice straight from said ice bucket. It’s one of my favorite parts of staying in a hotel. My sister didn’t believe me until she came into my room and saw me eating ice out of a full bucket like a goblin. I don’t know why I’m like this.


ahufs

Uhh!! You eat ice from the puke bucket?


sleepycafechick

I believe craving ice can be a symptom of iron deficiency, if you haven’t checked that


Falc0nia

I’m a fiend for ice and I’m anemic…I had no idea


EchoWolf2020

I don't think I want to stay in hotels anymore..


JordoHash710

Take 50-70min hot showers. I’ll just chill in there.


aangsty_airbender

It’s the absolute best. If I don’t leave the shower with silky smooth legs and pruney fingers, I didn’t do it right


AceSeron

They have surprisingly high water volume, feels too good man


[deleted]

[удалено]


madogvelkor

I do it behind the dumpster in back of Arbys. Though it's meth rather than cocaine and homeless guys rather than sex workers.


theglassjaw

The homeless guys would be sex workers if you would just pay them Edit: Too many of you think it's cool to talk about murdering homeless people


peon47

Look at Mr. Moneybags over here.


magicrowantree

Live out of a suitcase. I never use the dressers and only utilize the closet to hang special event clothing if that's what I'm traveling for. Order from the bar (if the hotel has one). It's nice not having to make my own drinks. My husband and I make a point to take the chance to chat with staff and get a drink since we don't go out to bars normally Ride an elevator (if there is one). Otherwise, go up a staircase


AccForTxtOlySubs

Good shower


Shoplifting_Panda

How come no one is saying. Walk in the door look around and say “this is room is nice.” Like I know you know we all do it.


Weary_Violinist_3610

Leave the air con on as long as I’m staying there. Long showers or baths Uninterrupted masturbation session Leave my towels on the floor ( if I did that at home the missus would castrate me)


Littman-Express

Not always uninterrupted. Use the do not disturb sign, otherwise you’ll be beating it after just waking up, and housekeeping will just walk in at 10 past 10 in the morning.


GoKartBirdie

Wear shoes indoors. Ain’t no way my bare feet are touching that carpet


AnchovyZeppoles

Lol I get so grossed out by hotel floors too, even if they “look” clean. I bring flip flops for the shower (the kind with holes so the water drains out) and wear them around the room, too. Less gross if it’s a tile or hardwood floor.


d_-_o-o_-_b

Poop with the door open.


RosesSpins

Just jumping on to say that if you take any of the unused mini lotions, shampoos, conditioners, soap etc., Ronald McDonald houses, Homeless Shelters, Schools with "Caring Closets" can all use them if you want to dontae!


Necessary-Koala1840

Pretty much stay naked the entire time I’m in the room. So liberating!


[deleted]

Fuck my husband without worrying the kids will hear us. I couldn't possibly give less of a shit if strangers heard us but our kids are old enough now that it would suck for them and they're up late and early enough that it's a pain in the ass for us. Well, for me at least - it distracts me pretty badly sometimes. The last time we had a hotel room to ourselves was 2014. Honestly, I don't want much for a vacation - just a decent hotel with maybe a hot tub, a movie and take out in bed, and worry-free fucking.


pingwing

You should get a hotel for a night, or weekend, it would be a nice break and not as expensive as a full holiday.


Meltsomeice

Wear flip flops in the shower.


Druggid

I wonder how many other rules apply in both prison and hotels.


kaazir

So this was a complete mistake. About 4 or so years ago my wife and I go to Memphis to see a comedian and have some random fun for our anniversary. We get back to the hotel at the end of the night and we cuddle a bit and things start to get hot and heavy. Turns out it's that time of the month and she really wants to continue so I say OK and that I can shower or clean up after. We're going at it doggy style and at one point I slip out and with out thinking I wrap my hand around my dick to aim and reinsert. I then immediately put my hand down on the sheet as I steady myself and we continue. We finish up and I click the light on so I can clean up and there on the bed isn't just a little blood, there is a perfect bloody handprint as well as a couple other streaks. We were both mortified and didn't know what to say or do. We ended up kinda sleeping on the comforter instead of the sheets and left early. I felt sooooo bad for the hotel staff and there was a small part in the back of my mind that worried the Memphis police were going to contact me about a potential murder because of the bloody hand.


cake--96

I work at a hotel in Memphis. blood on sheets is one of the most uninteresting things we could find in a room lol since people are asking, some of the more interesting things that have been found while I was working : a butt plug in a take out container,, so many sex toys. you can't imagine how many, OUNCES of weed. so much weed, $5000 cash in an envelope, lots and lots of weapons. people really frequently put a gun in the safe in their rooms and then just forget about them. and I work right on Beale so we get so many people running around drunk/drugged up/naked. and homeless people will come in and try and get breakfast, we usually give them food but a lot of them are very ill so they can't really just stay around the guests and they'll get very upset about being told to leave. one pulled a knife out on my manager. if you ever stay in downtown Memphis please do not expect a quiet stay lol


GuitarKev

Put all the dirty sheets and towels on the bed and leave a $20 on the nightstand.


ska_robot

Play Night Crawlers


Human-Evening564

Have a bath with the water up to the lip


Don_Lozenger

Jump on the beds.


blualipa

Pay.