A friend died from cancer some 15 years ago. He had the absolute blackest of humour and when he was in the hospice and getting worse he decided to throw a farewell party. When he woke up the next morning he said "Damn it, now I'm feeling better!" While these were not his actual last words, he did die later that day.
I spent the last three days of my best friend's life sitting with him. Someone had to drink the whiskey. My best friend served in the Marine Corps with me. We had many adventures. At one point I told him "I always thought I'd die first." He said, "Well, go ahead!"
Or just to quote famous folks:
Richard Faynman when dying off Lung cancer. His last words were: "Dying is boring!"
Famous cardiologist (forgot his name), his last words were spoken when he was looking at his EKG line go flat he said: "Hmm, it stopped!"
My grandad called the night before he died to say he wasn’t feeling so well.
Never heard him complain once before that in my life. He’d been very unwell for around ten years before that.
I’m not sure but my grandad had some pretty good last words, before he went into a coma and never woke up he said his last words to my uncle and those words were and I shit you not “scratch my balls”
Exorcizamus te,
omnis immundus spiritus
omnis satanica potestas,
omnis incursio infernalis adversarii,
omnis legio,
omnis congregatio et secta diabolica.
Might as well get those demons out.
I just wanna let my elder bro know that even tho I act mean to him I love him.
Edit: Thanks for all your good thoughts.... I was kinda embarrassed to tell him if anyone can relate cuz we never been clingy to each other.... So I just bought Hershey's chocolate for him(since he like them) when I went to the shop and he said thanks :)
I met a customer once who told me that when his mom was about to pass in her hospital bed, she kind of stared off into space for awhile, looked at her son and said, “Mark, would you like to know what it’s like on the other side?” and then smiled, and passed on. That always chilled me in a really sublime, beautiful way. Something like that.
When my grandpa died, we all knew he was dying. He had a stroke and could no longer talk clearly, but that didn't stop him from trying. I was visiting him in hospice and I had to leave to get to work. The last words he said to me was that he loved me, and I told him that I loved him so much right back. I had intended to come back after work, but he died that afternoon.
My granny died about a year after my grandpa. She had gotten sick (really bad UTI) and we were pretty worried about her. She started feeling better and one evening, she was just SO cheerful and happy and she was just thrilled to be able to socialize. We (she lived with my parents, so me and my husband, and my parents) sat around in her bedroom and just chatted, had dinner, watched a movie, and then left when she was ready to call it a night and go to bed. She told me she loved me, and I told her I loved her, we said "sugar, sugar" in unison, laughed together and then I left (my family says sugar-sugar when we are too far (distance) from each other or if we're sick and don't want to hug/kiss. We also say it AS we are hugging or kissing hello/goodbye, it's just a term of endearment I guess). She died that night, in her sleep.
I'm SO blessed that the last words they heard from me and that I heard from them were expressions of affection. I miss them both so much.
“I wish I’d watched more tv”
My dad used to say when I was a kid and obsessed with cartoons “nobody ever died saying they wish they’d watched more tv”.
Im petty as all hell
“I can see, Remi! He‘s waiting for me! Good boy.”
My dog is still alive but I will realistically outlive him. I really hope those are my *true* last words.
“To those who have wronged me, I forgive you.”
You aren’t aware that any conversation could be your last, and I don’t want anyone to feel guilt about doing me wrong just because they procrastinated on an apology.
Hopefully I will have a son, daughter, or wife with me and I can just leave them on a treasure hunt that doesn’t exist. Maybe even a scheme to make them find a treasure chest that’s just a picture of my old wrinkly butt. And my last words will be the first hint of probably only 2 or 3. I don’t want it to be that hard or take very long to figure out, but I want them to think it’s something important
Edit: spelling
I don't know but as a joke it would be funny if I got like a song stuck in their heads since it can't be stuck in mine since I'm going to be dead. Like "where did you come from...*wheeze* cotton eye joe...?"
A friend died from cancer some 15 years ago. He had the absolute blackest of humour and when he was in the hospice and getting worse he decided to throw a farewell party. When he woke up the next morning he said "Damn it, now I'm feeling better!" While these were not his actual last words, he did die later that day.
Metal.
Bless his heart and rip
People a lot of times feel and look better right before they die. Many times someone unresponsive will wake up and talk soon before passing.
I spent the last three days of my best friend's life sitting with him. Someone had to drink the whiskey. My best friend served in the Marine Corps with me. We had many adventures. At one point I told him "I always thought I'd die first." He said, "Well, go ahead!"
“Dying? Ha! That’s the last thing I’ll do!”
followed by "now check this out"
"Now dig on this." - Bully Maguire
Bruh that’s awesome
“I feel remarkably unwell.”
Remarkably
marked
oh hi mark!
"Feeling of impending doom" is actually taken very serious as a nurse.
Or just to quote famous folks: Richard Faynman when dying off Lung cancer. His last words were: "Dying is boring!" Famous cardiologist (forgot his name), his last words were spoken when he was looking at his EKG line go flat he said: "Hmm, it stopped!"
My grandad called the night before he died to say he wasn’t feeling so well. Never heard him complain once before that in my life. He’d been very unwell for around ten years before that.
My only regret is that I have...boneitis.
Tell my wife I said “Hello.”
What makes a man go neutral?
Lust for gold? POWER? Or were you just born with a heart full of *neutrality*?
I'm disappointed that it took this long to scroll down to this.
Don't you worry about boneitis, let _me_ worry about blank.
He was busy being an 80's guy...
I'll see you tomorrow. You won't see me, but I'll see you. \*wink\* \*dies\*
What if they just keep the body around and come by and high five you every day, who gets the last laugh then?
The cops
and the inmates who shank you for being a corpse hi-fiver
BURY ME WITH MY MONEY
I'm stealing this.
I’m not sure but my grandad had some pretty good last words, before he went into a coma and never woke up he said his last words to my uncle and those words were and I shit you not “scratch my balls”
did he?
They all did in the hope he would wake up.
That's not how the genie in the lamp works, sir.
5 minutes. You beat me on this by 5 minutes. You sir, have an excellent train of thought that I too was a passenger on.
Absolute chad
He sure was
Must have been a really good scratch if he fell into coma after it
Based and Comapilled
I mean my grandma’s last words were “my mom’s name, get me some water”
"You guys wanna see a dead body?"
GENIUS!!
Hilarious!
Brb
Online 90 years ago
Yeah I think he won’t come back. Not sure though
And now you started a new religion
What are ya gonna do, shoot me?
*shoots*
_class bell rings_
*Pumped up kicks intensifies*
"What are you gonna do? Stab me?" - Quote from man stabbed
I’ve been pissing in your coffee for thirty years!
That's strange, I've been putting my coffee in your thermos to take to work with you ..
Explains why he died of ammonia poisoning.
lol unexpected
“If only I’d copied & pasted those chain emails…”
*Grandma noooooo!*
Skadoosh
You'll also have to say it exactly like Jack Black in Kung-fu Panda
Idk why that is so funny to me but bruh hahahaha
I told you I was sick.
The man said it before me :(
Something in latin idk
Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursio infernalis adversarii, omnis legio, omnis congregatio et secta diabolica. Might as well get those demons out.
I am not a believing man but sir, this is not a time to be making new enemies.
Romanes eunt domus
People called 'Romanes', they go, the house?
It says Romans go home!
No it doesn't. What's the Latin for 'Roman,' come on!
"Romanus?"
Goes like?
"Annus"?
Vocative plural of 'annus' is...?
anni?
ROMANI ITE DOMUM
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit
e pluribus anus
Streets ahead
*Memento Mori* remember you will die
“Those were awesome enchiladas”
As you died on the toilet, ken?
I left the money in the…
Banana stand?
[удалено]
They burned down the banana stand.
big yellow joint, big yellow joint, i'll meet you down at the big yellow joint
He’s a flamer Michael.
You just made a fool out of yourself in front of T-bone
\*continues to be alive for several minutes in awkward silence\*
Kind of an excruciatingly long Deadpool farewell sort of thing.
YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!!
It wasn’t worth it
Are you okay?:/
Clear my search history
We won't let you down.
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna run around and desert you
You can't start in the middle of the song. You know the rules. And so do I.
r/unexpectedRickAstley
*loud snoring* Fuck last words, I'm dying in my sleep
If you have ever said words you have last words
“I’m going to bed”
Mine would be "I'll do it after I wake up"
"if that damn construction site starts at 5am one more time i'm gonna die"
Last words..."I don't want to go to work in the morning"
Learn this one trick employers never want you to know!
LEEROY JENKINS!!!
Oh my god he just ran in. Stick to the plan!
GOD DAMNIT, LEROY!
Game over man.
Yeah nah
Yeah nah fucken oath
nah yeah struth
The Australian way 👍
Yeah nah yeah? Nahhh
With my last breath, I curse Zoidberg!
I just wanna let my elder bro know that even tho I act mean to him I love him. Edit: Thanks for all your good thoughts.... I was kinda embarrassed to tell him if anyone can relate cuz we never been clingy to each other.... So I just bought Hershey's chocolate for him(since he like them) when I went to the shop and he said thanks :)
Tell him now.
Then die, just to make sure.
Lmao
I second, tell him now, you never know when you will no longer have the chance to tell people how you feel.
That's so wholesome I love it
Simulation completed. Logging off.
#in your face space coyote!
r/SimpsonsShitposting
person 6,819,563,934 left the simulation
We've been trying to reach you about your cars extended warranty.
“Shoot straight, you bastards. Don’t make a mess of it.”
“HOLD MY BEER, WATCH THIS!”
*Goes to bed and dies in sleep
I met a customer once who told me that when his mom was about to pass in her hospital bed, she kind of stared off into space for awhile, looked at her son and said, “Mark, would you like to know what it’s like on the other side?” and then smiled, and passed on. That always chilled me in a really sublime, beautiful way. Something like that.
You can hear the angels screaming: ‘we have someone who’s about to blab. Shut down all systems NOW. THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!
#2319! #WE HAVE A 2319!
I love you. Goodnight.
Get off my oxygen tu......
Finally!
i’d want to tell my family to get an ouija board so we can talk here and there
This comment needs to be further up! It would be So Fun to mess with people and watch them freak lol!
Bet you $20 I can hold my breath longer than you
Unfulfilled life: "Not like this", fulfilled life: "Let's do this!"
Who will the world revolve around now?
Rosebud
I told you I had Ligma
I left everything to the cats.
“I did it all for the…nookie.” *eyes roll back*
“Don’t- eat- the clam chowder, at the toyota december to remember event”
I love you
When my grandpa died, we all knew he was dying. He had a stroke and could no longer talk clearly, but that didn't stop him from trying. I was visiting him in hospice and I had to leave to get to work. The last words he said to me was that he loved me, and I told him that I loved him so much right back. I had intended to come back after work, but he died that afternoon. My granny died about a year after my grandpa. She had gotten sick (really bad UTI) and we were pretty worried about her. She started feeling better and one evening, she was just SO cheerful and happy and she was just thrilled to be able to socialize. We (she lived with my parents, so me and my husband, and my parents) sat around in her bedroom and just chatted, had dinner, watched a movie, and then left when she was ready to call it a night and go to bed. She told me she loved me, and I told her I loved her, we said "sugar, sugar" in unison, laughed together and then I left (my family says sugar-sugar when we are too far (distance) from each other or if we're sick and don't want to hug/kiss. We also say it AS we are hugging or kissing hello/goodbye, it's just a term of endearment I guess). She died that night, in her sleep. I'm SO blessed that the last words they heard from me and that I heard from them were expressions of affection. I miss them both so much.
Hold my beer
When I die, I want to die like my grandfather, who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
Fucking hell - I remember my dad telling that joke in the 1970s 😅🤣
My dad tells me this too, never gets old
Just like the kids in the car
You monster
See, I'm not a monster, I'm just ahead of the curve.
In the 1700s that joke was a carriage.
"I love you too." *It means I won't be all alone when I die like I fear*.
*dies from acid hallucinations making you think you can fly into arms of god
If I died and the Christian God existed, I wouldn't be meeting him - rather his much tanner counterpart.
Greek orthodox god?
“I wish I’d watched more tv” My dad used to say when I was a kid and obsessed with cartoons “nobody ever died saying they wish they’d watched more tv”. Im petty as all hell
Remember! Reality's an illusion, the universe is a hologram, buy gold! Byeeee!
Thomas Jefferson SURVIVES!!!
I shall return.
“I can see, Remi! He‘s waiting for me! Good boy.” My dog is still alive but I will realistically outlive him. I really hope those are my *true* last words.
I'll be back
Put the cookie down now
Uwu
I know I’m borderline an idiot because whenever I see “uwu” in my head I hear “ooh wuh oo”
(starts hearing video killed the radio star)
That was cool
Please turn off that beeping and put on some music.
I'm pretty fucking far from ok
Squeal like a pig boy
living is gay
"Last person alive is gay" \*dies\*
Fuck this shit I'm out.
That was all so amazing. Thank you. I love you.
“To those who have wronged me, I forgive you.” You aren’t aware that any conversation could be your last, and I don’t want anyone to feel guilt about doing me wrong just because they procrastinated on an apology.
It seems a bit laggy..
Runs Dead
SHIT I FORGOT TO DELETE BROWSER HISTORY
Hopefully I will have a son, daughter, or wife with me and I can just leave them on a treasure hunt that doesn’t exist. Maybe even a scheme to make them find a treasure chest that’s just a picture of my old wrinkly butt. And my last words will be the first hint of probably only 2 or 3. I don’t want it to be that hard or take very long to figure out, but I want them to think it’s something important Edit: spelling
Tell the Devil I am coming for him.
I just cut my finger on that edge
I have three billion dollars. It’s hidden at..
"You were always my greatest love and greatest achievement."
I choose death by snu snu
It’s been real
"Finally"
Goo-goo gaa-gaa. It's a callback.
Ah fuck, I can't believe you've done this.
'Tis but a scratch.
Oh no grab the wheel!
Long Live The King
“I shouldn’t of ate that chicken nugget off the floor”
Desember 4rd
"Ayo I think I left the oven on"
I don't know but as a joke it would be funny if I got like a song stuck in their heads since it can't be stuck in mine since I'm going to be dead. Like "where did you come from...*wheeze* cotton eye joe...?"