T O P

  • By -

james_dean3301

Being so "tough & dominant" that they don't know they're being such an asshat. For context, there's this guy I know who basically asserts dominance by acting tough and violent, and degrading others by making unnecessary remarks just so he'd be seen as 'cool' and such. By doing so, he thought everyone feared him (& his presence) when in fact everyone's tired of it.


vikraej

“Knowing” everything. Sure, intelligence is nice, but it’s fucking transparent when you start bullshitting just so you don’t have to admit there’s something you don’t know. Especially if I do know it.


Animator_Spaminator

I like it when someone admits they’re wrong. They say something, and let’s say I or someone else corrects them, and they say something like “really? I didn’t know that!” Or admitting they were wrong in an argument. That’s attractive


shrivvette808

My math professors must think I'm hot as fuck


yianni_

So you got the brains, but have you got the touch?


weirdo0808

Being a "nice guy".


alistofthingsIhate

Sorry about that first guy's comment having major incel vibes.


weirdo0808

I'm a girl, that's not even the worst thing that's been said to me lol but thank you friend, I know not everyone on reddit is like this. Saying nice guy is like an incantation that summons the incels.


maszah

Putting other people down, to make themselves look better. No, you are not making yourself look better. You're being a dick.


Traditional-Chapter7

Everything that tik tok eboys think makes them attractive


Wismond

*bites lip* *ruffles hair* *smirks*


ClairevoyantSlime

Cringe meter spikes through the roof every time


GameofPorcelainThron

You don't like guys who constantly and obsessively lick their lips in between words? :D


man_in_the_red

You saying you aren’t attracted to Heath Ledger’s Joker?


DuckOfDeathV

Why so sex-y?


geocentric-jujube

The one up man. Almost always dominates the conversation and one ups everyone else’s experiences and replies. Shows me you’re immature and can’t hold a conversation without the focus being on you.


superjack500

Yeah, I for one have always been great at not shifting the focus to me.


tapiocatsar

I know one of these guys at work and it’s been fun messing with him. First I told him I was picking up some Japanese lessons. He lived in Japan-he tooootally knows Japanese. Second, I divulged that I know basic Mandarin (Chinese) and wow he knows Cantonese fluently (cool one up bro but wrong language). Now I’m planning on telling him I’m learning Hebrew just to see if he lived in Israel or something. I love messing with one-up men and if you haven’t done it, try it.


zazzlekdazzle

Treating dates like an informercial for themselves.


nubsauce87

"But wait, there's more! Have sex with me within the next 90 minutes and you'll get not one, not two, but THREE extra orgasms! Be the envy of all of your friends with this limited one-time-only offer!"


Jaranon

Act now and I'll throw in an STI free of charge.


daytonakarl

A free Subaru? Okay then I'm in!


LegitimateAwardShow

BILLY MAYS HERE with an all new product that will blow your mind! The all new "Cervix Smasher 3000!" It slices, it dices, it gets the job done in 3.2 seconds! Order now!


1982throwaway1

"Vince the Shamwow guy here... [You're gonna love my nuts](https://youtu.be/_XEjI2cx2tk?t=53)"


Clemen11

The funny thing about Vince, is he actually localised for Spanish. When he did the same advert but in Spanish, he said "Mira mi huevo" which translates from Spanish slang to English as "look at my testicle"


Dani_California

Holy shit this is the best way to put it! The amount of dates I’ve been on where they haven’t asked me ONE. SINGLE. THING. about myself is unreal. 2 hours of self-involved conversation and I wonder if they’d even notice if I left.


Redacted9133

Flashing money/possessions. Nothing dries me up faster than a dude bragging about his watch or his car


Ashtrashbobash

My favorite thing to do is “brag” about my car. It’s a Toyota Yaris that is literally 15 years old and is my first car. I just like to joke about how “cool” my new car is and how it can fit up to five people if they are stacked up like Tetris. Obviously a joke tho I just think my car is funny looking and is super small.


Bitter_Theory5467

Guys and/or girls who pride themselves on being able to out drink or outsmoke everyone until they’re a blubbering mess. Or doing a bunch of drugs. They think they’re so epic but it’s honestly embarrassing when it’s a constant and people have to babysit you during a get together.


WickedDick_oftheWest

I used to be this guy! Then I realized the reason I could drink more than all of my friends was because I was 310 lbs, drank on a fairly regular basis, and would drink for the sole purpose of getting hammered. Shit’s stupid. Make a joke and laugh with your friends instead of making yourself a joke they’re laughing at


Glasswall1

Over-confidence or the need to show off


AndringRasew

*Famous last words: "Hey guys! Look what I can do!!"*👍


Silentcrypt

I can’t read or hear that phrase without thinking of Stuart from Mad TV. Funniest shit ever.


iWasChris

*flails incoherently*


renperez87

1. A high tolerance for alcohol as a personality trait. 2. Refusal to be emotional or into things that are “feminine”


lockdownhype

Bragging about having money


InternetKidsAreMean

My love will take you around the world, but my bank account won't get us past the airport.


TheyCallMeHacked

That's the advantage of owning a pilot's license. (I wish)


dcux

You need a lot of money to 1. Get the license 2. Rent the plane 3. Pay for fuel 4. Pay landing fees


thetheaterimp

Yeah, I don't think people realize it takes about $10k and a lot of time to get a private pilot's license. And then it's like $200+ an hour to rent a plane.


anonomotopoeia

For anyone who has teenagers interested in flying, there is an awesome program out there called Civil Air Patrol (CAP). It's an Air Force auxiliary program for kids 12 and up. My son flew his first plane at 13, though not take off or landing. He didn't stick with it more than a couple of years, but they offer opportunities to get a glider then a pilot's license while focusing on aviation and rocketry. It's amazing for those kids with a passion for that stuff! While my son didn't stay in it definitely guided his career choices later in life.


RogueDeku

Nice. I'm broke af


RockStar25

I don’t even have a vagina and I’m moist.


RogueDeku

Mission failed successfully


send_wholesome_nudes

I can feel my attractiveness rising already


RogueDeku

Confused stonks📈📈


Akwa_Rayna

My pot dealer was at my house one time. Goofy kid. Healthy, tall, thin, fit, sporty type dude. Not very smart... My sister was there and his idea to try and get her attention was to count all of his money in front of her,a couple grand in cash. She said later that as soon as he started counting his money he stopped being attractive because she could tell what he was doing lol.


triggerhappy899

Probably didn't help he had all ones


Artistic-Society8046

Expressing the need to be violent without any real cause or hint that they enjoy being violent. It just outright frightens me being anywhere need people that do that.


LoquatiousDigimon

Being overly macho


Zosimoto

Are you SLANDERING the late, great, Macho Man RANDY SAVAGE?!


Boschala

Truly, the cream of the crop.


ilene_cecelia

Allllllways rises to the top.


cannibalzombies

On balance, off balance, doesn't matter


m_sporkboy

He’s obviously the exact right amount of macho, almost by definition.


borgcubecubed

Arrogance


arthursadultdiaper

One up manship


Prestigious-Wrap2376

Two up manship


GTmakesthepaingoaway

Being overly aggressive with other people. Like, you are out at a club with him and he is ready to pick fights with anyone who (he thinks) looks at him or me wrong. I think it makes them feel macho but it's a huge turn off for me. It's happened a few times, and the last time I just turned around and took a car home. EDIT: Woah thank you for the awards, those are the first bar one I've ever had, so I guess I have something to thank those douchebags for after all! Also, sorry for the bad phrasing about the car, I did not steal one but I've been laughing my head off at all the comments making fun of me for it!


wathappentothetatato

Had a guy tell me that if he ever met my guy friends he would stare directly in their eyes to show dominance. How about you never meet them actually


Maddcapp

Did you laugh your ass off at him and say that’s the lamest thing I’ve ever heard?


opensandshuts

Bet he tries to break people's hands when doing handshakes, too. I always sort of laugh to myself when another guy overpowers their handshake. I think, "okay, this guy is very insecure, noted."


MyHamburgerLovesMe

No. She peed on him.


Sapling_Animation

To assert her dominance


[deleted]

[удалено]


Macabren

Joke's on him - to men who aren't emotionally ignorant, that would look like a respectful attempt to connect with your guy friends.


Lost-My-Mind-

"This guy keeps looking deep into my eyes........is he flirting with me? I mean, I've never been with a guy before......wait does Julia know? Is this their way of inviting me to a threesome? Julia keeps looking away and covering her hand over her face. She's embarassed, so she asked this guy to ask.........wow, this intense staring has been going on a while.......should I kiss him?" Meanwhile the "macho" dude is thinking "This fucker ain't braking eye contact! Oh hell naw! I'm the fucking KING of staring contests! Oh this is happening! He ain't backing down!!!! Wait......is he trying to kiss me???? Oh thats a hell of a tactic to break the stare. Well guess what! I'm gonna kiss better then you! Without breaking eye contact! I'm the alpha kisser here!!!!" And Julia is just like "Oh god, not again....."


vivvav

Gay chicken comes in many forms, it seems.


TahoeLT

Wait - first the frogs, and now the chickens? WHEN WILL IT END?


allwillbewellbuthow

Thank you for this story, I’m leaving today’s Internet on a high note!


rowshambow

> if he ever met my guy friends he would stare directly in their eyes to show dominance Fastest way for all your guy friends to immediately laugh at him.


AnarchyChick3n

Or instigate a game of homoerotic chicken


Mechanical_dog

Hope you and the car had a great night!


[deleted]

Never understood why people drink to fight. I drink to have a good time, and I maintain that mentality throughout the night. If a guy has gotten in multiple drunk fights, he’s just a dipshit that goes into the night with a fighting mentality, and the alcohol brings it out tenfold. If someone looks at me wrong at a bar, I smile and ask if they want a drink. 🤷‍♂️


ACaffeinatedWandress

Also, I’m going to assume that that drunken aggression he thinks is so sexy in a public bar will get all over me in private if I were stupid enough to date a man child who acts that way. When people tell you who they are, believe them the first time.


thoriniv

I dated a girl that wanted me to do that stuff, no ty.


Titillate_An_Ocelot

This may not be a universal experience for women, but when I match online with guys and they immediately start giving me heaps of over the top compliments about how sexy I am, it's a real turn off. It's uncomfortable to have a stranger commenting about your looks and sexualising you before you've even met or talked, even if you do find that stranger attractive.


amh8011

I was never able to actually put this weird feeling into words. Thank you! I knew it made me uncomfortable but I couldn’t figure out why.


PrincessWaffleTO

I feel like this and being too familiar too fast are my biggest turn offs. I went on a date with a guy and he hugged me way too tightly, held my hand because he loves “soft buttery skin,” made a comment about my toes, and kissed my cheek like we were lovers. 🥴🤢


quiet156

God this is so true. And the worst part is it’s often the first message, too. Over the top compliments or endearments when we’ve never spoken - they all feel so weird. I’m not that attractive, so it feels like they just send those same words to every woman on the site to see who responds. And it’s so overwhelming it feels fake and forced. I don’t understand the point.


blitzbom

Reading through this I've come to realize, I'm just ugly.


Nop_X

make 2 of us


truisluv

Women's work and man's work. I had an ex that said that and all he did was go to work and come home and sit in his recliner. On his day off he never left the recliner. So I did all the men's work and women's work and paid half the bills. This 1950's stuff don't work for me if I am paying half the bills.


howeringhouse1

You dodged a bullet by breaking up there, sounds like a pretty unreasonable person.


CCoolant

Not much of a bullet. Seems more like stepping outside from a house fire.


Lazy_Row_4489

I worked 14 hr days, my ex husband worked 8 and was laid off most of our marriage..... he pulled the women's work BS and I told him to get the fuck out..


truisluv

Good for you!


invertedrose

When they won’t let me do anything for myself. I dated a man who refused to let me open doors for myself and when we went to the store he would grab products out of my hands while I was reading the nutrition label to do it himself. It became irritating and it made me feel like he thought I was dumb.


saintsithney

Bragging about how tough and violent they are. It's not cute. It's somewhere between cringe and terrifying. Also, being confidently wrong about "What women are like" or giving compliments like "You aren't like other girls". My guy, if you hate women so much, why are you trying to get me to join you? Most women past high school mentality don't hate other women and hearing about how much you hate women doesn't make me feel safe, let alone attracted.


Wit-wat-4

You’ve written almost the exact comment I was going to, both things.


Murka-Lurka

Thinking that any form of kindness, weakness or compassion is ‘gay’.


RockinMadRiot

Some think that kindness and compassion is a weakness, but it takes so much more strength to be selfless and live in love.


lotttiee

Even the tiniest gestures men make to show they care give me butterflies every time


FutureCastaway

As a semi-closeted man in my 20's, the amount of men I'm around who don't know I'm gay that use slurs and make gay jokes is *stunning*.


renaissancetryhard

being mean to or about women. no, i don’t think it’s funny that you just insulted the appearance of both my best friend and i. no, that did not make me want to fuck you.


snailminister

Agreed! Negging is absolute turn off. "You are not like other girls" "Finally a real woman who behaves like woman". Dude, no. Being mean about other women is not going to make us feel flattered, just angry that you think most women are negative thing.


MsMuffinstuffer

Dick pics.


Bluellan

Now, a duck pic is very welcome.


airstrike900

Even as a guy I would love a duck pic


I_am_not_the_

I hope you like it [Duck pic](https://www.reddit.com/r/duck/comments/o5kfzt/meet_henry_from_norway_my_happy_duck_with_a_sassy/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)


airstrike900

I was scared to click on it but yes I am very pleased, it's an amazing one!


Bluellan

They do make you smile.


RewolbFael

I've never understood it, like has it ever worked? Has there ever been one time a girl has opened her phone to an erect penis from a rando and thought "yes please"?


The_Amazing_Shlong

It seems pretty obvious to me that the whole thing is more akin to flashing someone on the street than trying to pick someone up. Don’t think they care about the response


TheRealPyroGothNerd

Just ask why they sent a toothpick before blocking them.


Prototype273

To clean between your teeth after a nice meal


ErwinHeisenberg

It never works to actually pick up women. I have sent dick pics under only one set of circumstances: we are actively, unambiguously sexting, and I have been asked/given permission to send one.


ImHuckTheRiverOtter

And even then, I’m sending my WIFE pictures of my dick , which she has seen THOUSAMDS of times and has explicitly asked for me to send that picture, and the little voice in my head is like “dude, dont send that that, she’s gonna hate it”.


cleverpseudonym1234

I was asked for dick pics in exactly one relationship, and even I thought the picture looked gross. It’s not a self-esteem issue; I don’t have any insecurity about how it looks in person. But that picture isn’t something l expect anyone to want to see.


hochizo

The best way to take a dick pic is to not actually show the naked dick. Get hard, grab it through your pants or boxers so you can clearly see the outline (so it's trapped between your hand and your thigh), and send that. It looks wayyy sexier like that. Source: am girl


Zebidee

a) Thanks for the tip. b) RIP your inbox.


truisluv

Once I replied WHAT IS WRONG WITH IT? They never contacted me again and I am sure I gave them a complex.


e_j_white

"Trust me, I get a LOT of dick pics, and there's DEFINITELY something wrong with yours."


SaveTheLadybugs

That is genius. “Omg why does it look like that?!?”


MsMuffinstuffer

Have you seen a doctor lately???!!! Maybe you should. Prayers be with you.


paranoid_razorblade

Don’t mind me just seeing how to be more attractive Edit: I am aware this is reddit, I know how to not be a dick to women


six_-_string

Same. So far, so good.


1throwawayor4

Being weird about things they deem are “girly”. I have a blu ray/DVD collection with hundreds of movies. I had a guy check it out for a split second and say “oh, you have “girl” movies”. I have everything from legally blonde to the fast and the furious, to every best picture winner of the last 20 years. Apparently having anything other than action movies made it “girly”. We broke up quickly


BW_Bird

> “oh, you have “girl” movies”. Was your ex-boyfriends name "Vincent Adultman" by chance?


seanreidsays

What is this, a cross over episode?


Zjoee

Like some of us don't cook because it's "girly." I love to cook. I learned how to make THE best fudge brownies this year. My wife loves that I cook haha. Edit: here's the base [recipe](https://tasty.co/recipe/the-best-fudgy-brownies) for those brownies haha


kgiaaaa

My boyfriend cooks and I bake, i find it's a system that works best because I can't cook


Iamarnav25

Best I can do is a mug cake.


__NOT_A_DOG__

When they act like they throw the ball but they DO NOT throw the ball When they say NO When they send stick pics


nitz28

I will be following this user profile closely because of this solid first post. Good user.


Mr-Apollo

This is the first time I’ve seen a nonbot novelty account in a **long time**


a2starhotel

who's a good not dog?!


justputonsomemusic

“Alpha male” 🙄


DoomCircus

An unstable, early iteration of male. Needs further development and testing before public release.


noscreamsnoshouts

I want my men to be at least SP2


DoomCircus

Correct, those unstable alpha males are very insecure and require urgent security patches!


julienmhx

After coming from the shops with my friends, i always shout "who is the alpha male?" Half of them shout "me" and there's my trip without having to carry the groceries :D


pseudonymous13

I feel like this is a life hack which should be taught in schools...


epochpenors

And the new variant, ligma males


Drach88

What's a ligma.... WAIT A MINUTE....


jackfinch69

LIGMA CANDICE GOTTEM


cock_andballsman

Who the fuck is Steve Jobs?


MTDninja

deez nuts


ImperfectDivinity

“Sigma male” 😎


ChilliMayo

Sigma male grindset might be my favourite meme this year.


Catfisher4

Passive income


syfyguy64

What's funny is sigma in my state's prison system means you're a child molester or a high risk individual.


CommonCheeseFan

A sense of humor if it is not also paired with the ability to read the room.


Bellezabubs_

Bragging about wealth, expensive possessions, and blatantly using the guise of ‘kindness’ or ‘charity’ to humble-brag. Basically just making yourself sound like an asshole!


sammyjobogburr

the whole ' i wont let you do anything for yourself because thats not CHIVALROUS'. im not offended if you hold the door open, but it will almost certainly piss me off if you refuse to walk through a door that IM holding open.


LouTenant6767

Acting like an intimidating asshole to random people to appear as "tough". Ironically those same guys usually prefer to be submissive in the bedroom.


Umbran_scale

Clearly I'm doing something wrong, I'm submissive as hell, yet I'm about as intimidating as a patch of grass.


noscreamsnoshouts

Hey, don't be so hard on yourself! Patches of grass can hide spiders, or snakes or other dangerous and intimidating stuff! Like dog poo!


twasafunny

Especially in Australia


StormerSage

So what you're saying is... Be an ass if you want it in the ass :3


open_perspective

If you do the negging you get the pegging


SaveTheLadybugs

Just spit out a perfectly good sip of water reading this, so fuck you


Bobbi1206

Being arrogant and overconfident


LauraBabora325

How much they BRAAAAAG about themselves. REPEATEDLY. Like a couple comments on what their achievements are is great, but BRAGGING repeatedly about it & how they’re the best ever & “this one dude tried it but ya know, he came back telling me how much he respects me cuz I did it better” & blahblahblah, that’s such a turn off. That extreme narcissism & ego is 🤮


[deleted]

[удалено]


radicalbirb

Negging


InfernalOrgasm

What is negging?


Idiot_Savant_Tinker

Putting the other person down hoping that they will like you better. [One of my favorite XKCD comics](https://xkcd.com/1027/) mentions it.


rycbar99

Being a nice guy. Obviously I don’t mean an actual nice person - I mean the ‘you owe me sex because I’m a nice guy’.


Mrbananacompany

At first I was confused.


R3nmack

I was petrified.


loosememes

Yup, those pick me guys that try to use pity


AichSmize

You can't put NiceCoins into a GirlMachine and expect a SexReward.


IloveEnvy

Whats the exchange rate between a NiceCoin and a Stanley nickel


Aevum13

I'm a bit late but whatever. A man that takes everything seriously, of course there are places to be serious. But not everywhere. Have a little fun in life, it's to be enjoyed.


Gaiusotaku

I don’t know how it is with other guys but people always say I’m too serious. I’m literally just too shy to speak up if I don’t know you too well and making sure I don’t make a fool of myself. I’ll give short responses and wont emote too much. Once I figure out if I like you or not though, then I’m pretty much an open book.


Ashtrashbobash

On the other hand a guy who can never get serious. I’m all for fun and games, proper humor and stuff is great. When we need to have a serious talk they need to be able to handle it.


what_the_a

There’s a very specific type of gym bro who may be conventionally attractive and buff, but they have no personality whatsoever. Everything revolves around their gym schedule and eating brown rice, chicken, and broccoli every single day. EDIT: lol some of y’all getting so bent out of shape. I answered the prompt, it’s just my opinion, and it’s not that serious. You don’t have to agree.


BerserkBoulderer

LIGHTWEIGHT BABAAY!!! NOTHING TO IT BUT TO DO IT!


Mouts93

YEAHHH BUDDYYY!


HotRock5

EVERYBODY WANNA BE A BODYBUILDER BUT DONT NOBODY WANT TO LIFT NO HEAVY ASS WEIGHT!!!


DreadOcean72972

YOU GOTTA EAT BIG TO GET BIG BABY, DOSENT MATTER WHAT YOU EAT, YOU GOTTA EAT


Affectionate_Fee_317

BUT ILL DO IT THO


mondomonkey

YEEAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!


jesse2h

This entire thread so perfectly recreated Coleman’s self-hype in the gym. Brings a fuckin tear to my eye lol. Brb squatting 800 for reps now.


megustarita

Ain't nuthin but a peanut!


Quinnett

SMH THESE LADIES IN THE COMMENTS SUGGESTING TALKING LIKE THIS ISN’T THE PINNACLE OF ATTRACTIVENESS


Buboi23

NOTHING BUT A PEANUT


yougay420

YEAH BUDDY


MuchoRed

"what are you doing on Valentine's day?" What day is it? "It's Friday" Chest and back. I'm kidding, of course. Everyone knows Friday is leg day


JoeyJoJo_the_first

I worked with a guy who fit this description *exactly*. Couldn't hold a conversation about anything other than the gym and diet. He had no idea about world events, technology, cars, sports, history, nothing. And the only books he read were about the gym. He had a gorgeous girlfriend and I just figured there must be a side to him that we never saw. Finally met her at a work Christmas party and she was the blandest, most blank slate of a person I'd ever met, even moreso than the guy was. She also could only hold a conversation about the gym. Gold star if you can guess where they met.


TheFinnebago

Ya know, that’s kind of a sweet story. I bet they have nice dinners together talking about gym stuff.


Soviet_Russia321

I agree. What am I gonna do, fault a stranger for finding someone he clicks with?


VectorDotZero

*lifts with.


Sonic10122

*lifts Oh come on, you know they do that gym couple thing where he bench presses her.


kenlubin

Yes, it's a sweat story.


MoreThingsInHeaven

Really uplifting.


brodorfgaggins

I felt this story in my glutes


JoeyJoJo_the_first

Exactly! Nice dinners of brown rice, steamed chicken, and broccoli.


minlove

\*steamed chicken breast FTFY


maximumrelief

I'd like simple love like that.


b1cycl3j1had

Sounds like a perfect match?


potassium3919

Nothing but the pump 💪🏼


Capricorn_Alice

Overdoing it on the cologne/aftershave. I don’t want to smell you across the room period.


Still-Contest-980

Overly protective.


uniqueusername1171

Who was over protective of you? Point em out and I’ll give them a piece of my mind.


capitanooldballs

Your comment made me laugh out loud. Thank you haha


uniqueusername1171

Lol part of me thought I was gonna get a ton of angry comments of people thinking I was serious.


Electronic-Chef-5487

oh yes! This gets romanticized so much and I really don't find it appealing at all to be told what I can/can't do, or not be trusted to make my own judgments. I hate the "I'd beat up anyone who..." stuff. First of all, no you probably wouldn't, and second of all, I wouldn't want you to.


Heart2001

Leaving every decision to me. If a man is my partner then I want his input on decisions, even if they’re just small ones like what movie to watch or what to have for dinner. Shrugging and saying “I don’t know. You decide.” all the time is not going to make me happy. It’s lazy and it makes me feel more like a guy’s mother than his partner.