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I have a friend who made a collage of all the unsolicited dickpics, she would then add the new picture to the collage and send it to the man saying "welcome to the hive"


This is amazing! What a wonderfully creative idea.


Why would you wanna look at that many unwanted dicks though… multiple times 💀


As a wise man once said "Wear the dick pics like armor, and they can never be used to hurt you."


What are you gonna do? Punch your own dick?!


I'm sure she would get desensitized to it at some point


We are the Dick Pic Collage Society. Open your phone and surrender your dick pics. We will add your (laughable) biological distinctiveness to our collage. Your dick pic will adapt to service us. Resistance is futile.


Act really concerned by replying with a hyperlink to webmd of an STI.


I tell you h-what...that is genius!


Circle a random part that would look unnatural and point it out saying something is wrong with their dick.


*O* that looks like cancer


I had to have a mole removed from my dick, last time I’m fucking one of those.


I think I just wet myself!


Or just say. " Could you send it again?" "I can't see anything" (Repeat)


"Looks like a penis. Only smaller."


"I'll need a higher resolution file for the needed zoom level"


"Verizon has detected a potentially pornographic image sent to an underage user account. Sender information will automatically be forwarded to local authorities for assessment. Verizon appreciates your feedback on our beta features. Please visit Verizon.com/survey to let us know how we're doing."


Glad this is the top comment because it seems wild that it's so easy to just virtually flash people without consequence.


Seriously. Also, any guys who send these unsolicited want to explain why? Just the thrill of knowing a woman looked at your dick? Is it bc you’re hoping for the small chance that she’s actually into it? Or something else? I’m just a guy who’s never sent an unsolicited dick pic.


I wonder if it’s some kind of perverted “I like to think about how shocked they are” type of thing. Because predators who flash in public get off on shocking people. So maybe it’s the same with these guys.


It's one sided sexting. They're hoping to get naked pics back. Guys that send dick pics unsolicited are like the naked man on HIMYM. They do it because sometimes it works. Either that or they've been in a sexting relationship in the past and don't know how to communicate their feelings of lust outside of sending a dick pic. There aren't enough consequences for sending nudes unsolicited, so they keep doing it.


Lmao I might use this Edit: Wow, thank you so much for 2.5k upvotes. This is the most I’ve ever had


Put that text in special characters and there we go.


I used to ask if they were alright or why it looked like that. “Oh my gosh are you okay??” “Why does it look like that?” Stopped a lot of them real fast. And yes, it’s mean, but they showed me their dick without consent so all politeness was gone at that point.


There is no response too mean for unsolicited dick picks imho


“Forwarding this to your mom, does she prefer text or email?” Immediately followed with: “Nevermind, I’ll just do both.”


Absolutely love that lmao


"Forwarding this to my doctor, I'll let you know what they say." Then an unspecified amount of time later: "doctor just got back to me, says it just looks like a case of creepy asshole syndrome"


"doctor says it looks like a penis, only smaller."


You know it's illegal for a grown man to hold a baby's penis right?


"The dr asked why you're late hitting puberty"


"He needs you in his office urgently."


Can you please send me a picture of your drivers license next to it? The doctor called the cops on me for child porn. He said no healthy adult should have one that small.


...10 minutes later "how did I forget about Facebook messenger? I'm so silly. I'll shoot it over to her there too"


Save the pic, so when another one sends you a dickpic you can respond by sending one back and say "you make me so hard too"


I haven't seen a smurfs house for years Or im reporting you for sharing child pornography Both work really well


The second one has so many implications and insults in one. Well done


"Are you okay?? Get inside where it's warmer!"


“You need to see a doctor immediately, are you okay??”


"Wow, you are *so brave* to carry on like that, what an inspiration. Stay strong, little fighter!"


"Omg why does it look like that? Bro go see a doctor"


This is basically the answer I give whenever someone asks this question here on reddit. But I modify it slightly for more impact. Something on the lines of: "something doesn't look right. I'm sending the pic to my aunt who's a nurse" And then like 15 minutes later "she says you should get it checked out asap" And then don't respond or elaborate.


“My friend Darryl wants to know if he can call you”


I love this, or like, “omg- I have the best person to set you up with! Her cervix has a low ceiling, so she has really hard time finding partners— most guys get frustrated because they can’t get past the tip”.


I think that's too obviously a joke. The goal should be to make the person embarrassed about their dick. For example: "Haha gross! Where did you find that pic? I'm sure yours is much nicer. Send me a pic of yours!"


Yeah, it should be more subtle. Like, "huh. I've never seen one like this before." or "Is it supposed to look like that?" or "Did something like, happen to it...?"


Or, a bigger dick pic back at him.


If he complains respond with, *"I thought we were sharing our collections?"*


This one's fresher than the others. They shrink in the freezer.


Put a Snapchat flower crown on it and send it back


Involuntary snort-laugh at this one.


Is that a child's penis? Did you actually send me child porn? I'm turning this over to the police.


This is the reply I give most of the time. Haven’t had anyone not block me yet, lol


I saw a thread on this once, she'd posted a screen grab of an online pedo reporting form. Absolutely legendary


The groupchat rates it 3/10 Edit: this is my first comment that gotten this many upvotes.


Screenshot it, send the screenshot to the perpetrator and say "look what this sad little boy just sent me" followed by "sorry, wrong person"


Response: “No, this is what they were all talking about in the group chat! 3/10 at best. No thanks” Next message: “Oops. Sorry, wrong number”


My trainer (super hot young woman) did something similar, simply typing back "5/10" to an unsolicited dick pic. The guy was quite pissed off and wrote back why she would say that. As she texted back and also told me with a shrug "eh. I've seen better, I've seen worse." Savage.


The Lion, The Witch, and the AUDACITY of this bitch. How much of a complete asshat does one have to be to not only send an unsolicited dick pic, but also feel that he is entitled to be angry when his cock is rated poorly.


Not even poorly, just average.




Recovering from flu and that is the first good laugh I've had in over a week!


Just got the flu and this almost killed me dead.


What did the comment say?


Another good one is sending a dick pic back ( had many female friends to this to people it works well from my experience) easy to get one off Google.


"Mine's bigger"


i wanted a meal not a snack


I remember back in college we were pre-gaming in one of the dorms before heading out to the party... One of my lady friends got a random dick pic from a number she didn't know. She immediately showed the whole group and we all were laughing. Then we got a great idea! We told her to "act like you are into it" and request that he send a pic of his asshole too. And the madman did it! He must've had a stand or something because he took a picture of himself, face-down ass-up on his knees on the couch, full spready of the asshole. Then we immediately sent a group selfie of all of us laughing and like "OOHHHHH!" with the whole mixed group of men and women. He went radio silent after that, probably blocked her. Twas hilarious, then we got shitfaced. Great night...


What an asshole! What a dick!


What a save!


Nice one!


This is Rocket League!


This is great. If dudes are gonna send things unsolicited they gotta realize it’s probably not staying private lol


Knowing some guys they'd probably be turned on by that for some reason lmao


Probably, and that's fair enough! Judging by the ghosting, I think the man was shamed... as he should be for unsolicited dick and asshole pics... (well, the asshole pic was solicited I suppose)


“Solicited asshole pic” 💀


I once told a guy "I'm sorry but I'm really only interested in above average sized partners", and he had a fucking meltdown. It doesn't matter how big the guy actually is, this is the only situation in which gaslighting is completely acceptable. He started typing "it's big" over and over and demanded I rate it. I asked "Do you really want to rate it?" And he responded "Rate it bitch" and when I said 2/10 he had a whole other meltdown and just starts posting his dick over and over again. When I said it was okay and that lots of women are fine with that he blocked me.


>when I said 2/10 This is a very smart rating to give it. 1/10 (or 0/10) is the lowest rating, and implies that you didn't really give it any thought. But giving it a 2 implies that you actually considered where it might rank, and found it to be near, but not quite at the bottom.


The only thing worse than being the worst, is being mediocre lol


Followed by, "would not recommend".


2.3 -2.5 Means you have a rather large sample size to compare to so its not just random chance hes small.


This is hysterical!


There's probably some metadata encoded in a picture that reveals the location taken. Be nice to scare them a bit with their location


“Definitely the smallest dick in [Random small town that this dude lives in] that I’ve seen…”


"This is easily the biggest dick pick I've seen taken from LATITUDE 54.104704, LONGITUDE-4.633462"


"Girls near you don't want to fuck you tonight!"


The best I ever had was a guy who had texted me after inquiring about a room I was renting out, and would not leave me alone and kept trying to flirt despite multiple turn downs, so finally I asked him to send face pics, then just responded “oh.” And left it and my god do insecure men melt quickly. Popsicle shit I think I still have screen caps… https://imgur.com/a/imgr4Ry/


Letting their own imagination and insecurities do all the work is so satisfying and worse than anything you could have said or done.


"Unfortunately, I am not a doctor and am not legally allowed to advise you on what to do with that embarrassing problem." Refuse to elaborate because of legal concerns.


I read some months ago that a girl here in reddit used to take their profile pictures, photoshop their face onto the head of their dick and send it back to them.


This is hilarious but ngl, as a guy I kinda want a picture with my head on the head of my penis. Sounds funny


Just post one here. It'll *still* be unwanted, and you can test out firsthand the creativity of the people.


One time this dude I talked to for one night sent me a dick pic completely unwanted, he asked for my number the same night and he started the conversation with a dick pic. my ex roommate took his number, set the picture of a middle aged man as profile picture (on WhatsApp) and texted him telling him (s)he was a truck driver from a city nearby and (s)he found his number written on the door of a toilet at a gas station. This guy freaked out and blocked her after trying to understand better the situation. We laughed so hard and I think she’s still blocked on his phone (it happened 5 years ago). Edit gave more details


Putting his phone number on men's bathroom walls sounds like a good plan.


I had a friend do this to me as a joke once…it fucking sucked


I’m sorry, I would have never done it randomly. But this guy kinda deserved it


I mean yeah that dude deserved it…I’m just saying when my friend did it to be a dick it sucked…and I knew it was him because he was with me when I got a call and burst out laughing before I even told him what happened…I made him tell me where he put the number and I went and scratched it out


Actually had this happen to me yesterday. I decided to screenshot it and then use it to make AI art and sent it back to him. He was confused and unhappy. Then I proceeded to ask if he could send more with some different backgrounds and angles so I can see what other pictures I can create. He said no, and that this is the weirdest request he has ever gotten. So I said, yeah maybe it is weird, but it’s also weird to send people pictures of your genitalia unprompted. I also asked asked if I was officially off the dick pic list and he said yes. It worked 🤷‍♀️ Speaking of, I still have the picture. I may make more art and send it to him.


I misread your handle as “Apprehensive Cock” at first and was going to say your username checks out. It probably does but not in this situation specifically :v


“He said no, and that this is the weirdest request he has ever gotten” So I was laughing from the “confused and unhappy” but that part made me cry the most tears of laughter I ever have in my whole life because you deflated the shit out of him and also confused him, you trashed his ship and set his sails upon fire… This is one of the greatest things I’ve ever read and you’re a genius for this.


Send it randomly. Tuesday night at 10pm? Sure. Friday if you happen to wake up middle of the night? Go for it. Sunday lunch time so hopefully he’s with someone else for his embarrassment to be shared with. All different AI creations.


One, two, three, four, I declare a thumb war!


Do they make ones in adult size?


Hey look, it's a cock.... *but smaller....*


I have pics of split dicks (the body mod) that I return with.


This better not awaken anything in me.


Jesus Christ


I'm a bit of a connoisseur of shock content, but these really take the cake lol


Back before Tumblr banned porn there was a whole community of people posting their extreme body mods. Definitely saw a lot of stuff I never thought was even possible. The one who had his head cut twice so it was basically a 4 piece dick was definitely something. Had a Prince Albert in all four parts and yes his urethra was just cut cleanly through and I still sometimes randomly ask myself how pissing with that even works. Must make a mess.


"and for that reason, I'm out"


Unnecessary knowledge to google




"It's like a dick but smaller!"


that gonna leave mental scar lmfao


There’s lots of replies like this one but this right takes the cake. The emojis are just too much


Man that’s brutal lol


send one back




as in Dick Chainy?


Shooting friends in the face?


Send a bigger one


A sophisticated dick. A dick with a future.


How sophisticated we talking? Put a top hat on it?


Don't forget the bow tie


A cautionary tale on this: One time a friend of mine received an unsolicited dick pic while we were hanging out with a bunch of friends and she asked us to send the guy dick pics back from her phone and then *delete the conversation with all the dick pics in it so she wouldn’t see them*. It was great, the dude got like 4 dicks back and definitely got the message. Next morning I get a handful of angry text messages because we only deleted the sent text messages and not the dick pics from her camera roll…so the poor girl saw all of the dicks when she wanted to see none. TLDR: definitely do this but **delete the dick pics after you send them back**


I mean shit, but did she not understand that if you play with fire you might get burned


Maybe *angry* is an exaggeration but she was obviously less than thrilled that her camera roll was full of dicks


I used to send a bunch of pics of diseased ones back. Just completely spam their phone with gonorrhea dicks, chlamydia dicks…etc


One of my best friends got an unsolicited dick pic from a guy on bumble who she just started talking to. She found him on Facebook and found out that his dad was actually a preacher. She then took a screenshot of their conversations and sent it to his dad 😂 he took care of it


"Dude. Child porn is not a joke, you shouldn't be sharing these things. Please get help."


"It said the the file was to small to download, what did you just send"??


Says this file may contain a virus. You should get yourself checked.


this is my favorite response lol


Oh cool, a micro-penis. I never thought I would see one. When were were you diagnosed? It is a shame there is no cure. You are very brave.


"No thank you, I don't smoke."


Send a picture of period blood or cervical mucus.


A fresh episiotomy.


"Nice cock. Would look nice with the rest in my collection."


Would look nice in a jar with the rest of my collection.


They could take this one the wrong way 💀


You don’t keep a stash of dicks in your closet?


The general grevious of dicks


*mechanical coughing noises*


Find a picture of a vag with some extremely grizzly disease and send that back. Keep sending diseased vag pics. Stop for nothing.




Look them up on social media, find their parents, and send them the photo saying "This is what your son is sending to people on the internet."


All jokes aside, this is probably the right answer.


Alanah Pearce Of IGN, Funhaus and a writer on the God of war team actually did this


Or just tell them that you done so (and perhaps also mention the police and/or his workplace). The uncertainty of it would eat away in their heads, and the only way they can find out is by revealing it themselves.


We ended up doing this for a friend who received a dick pic from an old HS classmate she hadn't seen or talked to in over a decade. Found his family members through his FB, messaged all of them asking if they can get in contact with dickpicsender's parents as he is sending unsolicited pictures of his penis, and we want to give them an opportunity to set him straight before escalating towards legal consequences. Received a few replies and apologies, including his aunt who told us it wasn't the first time this has happened, but we never heard from the guy again.


I've started sending back pictures of cat's anuses... kinda the unsolicited view when you have cats


I knew a girl who would respond with a pic of a severed dick. She had so many of these pics on her phone bcos she would try and get the pics that looked most like the dick she'd just been sent.


Not quite a Dick pic but it had a guy who I had interviewed for a room for rent try to start something and he was being gross and aggressive So my boyfriend goes “ask for face pics”. I did, he sent them. And then my boyfriend goes “now just reply, ‘oh.’” And I did. And this dude LOST. HIS. MIND. SOOOOOO much insecurity. So much. I still have screenshots https://imgur.com/a/Ja17Jag/ This was like. A third of what he texted me afterwards


Brilliant. Amazing what can be done with a 2 letter word!


"You look like a bottom"


Ask for banana for scale then ghost.


"why do you have a picture of a babies penis? im sending this to the cops and reporting you"


I do that--ask why they have CP


Late here, one time my daughter got one from a stranger on Snapchat. So she sent a pic back of her and about 20 of her friends, guys and girls, all making different faces that all pretty much expressed “wtf bro.” Dude had a complete meltdown down in response. All the kids found it pretty hilarious.


Don't respond at first, let them dictate what they clearly want from you. If they act all embarrassed and apologize, they wanna get off to the humiliation. If they get upset because you don't respond, they just want attention. If they start asking for praise or if you like what they sent you, they clearly want you to feed their ego. THEN, you respond appropriately based on those reactions. Wanting humiliation? Be unaffected entirely. Just act like a typical Tuesday is all this is. Wanting attention? "K." That's all you need to send if you send anything at all. Want an ego boost? Critique the shit out of the photo explicitly. Not their dick, but the way the photo was taken. Lighting, angle, quality, exposure, posing, just grill the shit out of their photography skills.


I feel like to make it worse for someone who wants the ego boost, critique the way the photo was taken, and then as an afterthought mention that the dick is small. That would sting.


"And next time maybe zoom in more since the main focus is really hard to see"


This person is striking to kill, Jesus.


Fatality For serious is is my favorite way


Just send a magnifying glass emoji.




unwanted gore pic


Can’t believe I had to scroll so far to see this. Especially a pic of a penis mid-surgery.


"Your dads was bigger..."


And he says hi.


I always send a photo of a larger, more robust looking penis. The man always gets really mad and goes “GROSS WTF?!?!” and I say “oh I thought we were sharing photos of penises.” This is great because it’s a simultaneous lesson in consent, homophobia, boundaries, and maybe even body acceptance. I’ve also found their moms on social media, and sent them screenshot asking “this is your mother, correct?”


“What is that? A dick for ants!?”


"I didn't want to out myself but it's not as big as mine" (Respond with bigger one)


I was working on my master’s in forensics when a guy thought sending me a weenie photo would get him nudes in return. I ignored him but he pestered me. That’s when I looked down at my textbook, snapped a photo, and sent it. He didn’t appreciate the autopsy photo I sent. He should have been more specific about who he wanted nudes of. To quote him, “what is that? Why would you? My boner is dead. You’re disgusting.” I hope I ruined his little Mr. Happy for the rest of the evening.


Turn it into an NFT and share the link with him. If he doesn't want to get caught he will need to buy it from you.


In some countries, this would get you in legal trouble... Even unsolicited. In Canada it's illegal for a person to distribute an intimate image of another person without their consent. Doesn't seem to carve out exceptions for unsolicited dick pics.


"It's like a penis, only smaller"


Final Answer: Clitoris?


A friend of mine would turn them into Beaker from the Muppets. I cackle every time I think about it.


Blue Waffle photo captioned “come and get it big boy “


"Oof, what happened to make it look like that?"


I saw one in a screenshot, "why does it look like that?" Absolute murder.


"It's smaller than mine" Works best if you're a girl.


Joke's on you, I'm into that shit.


This is an automated message generated by the Reddit team. Your image has been found to be a violation of 42 U.S.C. § 1283 (2020). An image you sent has been scanned by our Al Bot and was flagged as an unsolicited picture. Your account is scheduled to be reported to the police. Our bot is currently in BETA testing; sometimes it makes mistakes. If you believe this message was in error, reply "HELP" Otherwise, you will be contacted by your local authorities within 24hrs


Just ask them if that mole on the side of their dick has always been there and then block them.


Take a screen shot and send it back to them “look at so-and-so’s little dick”


1.Screenshot 2. Send it back with "OMG look what ___ just sent me. It's so little. I dont think Ive ever seen one that small." 3. Say "Oops meant to send that to the girls chat, lol."


“I wear stilettos bigger than your dick, not even going to bother sending this one to the group chat to rate.”


I’ve been WAITING for this question. I’ve dealt with this more times than I can count and I have found basically nothing works when a lot of these creeps get off on our disgust/offense. So 9 times out of 10, the name calling, the “tiny dick” insults etc are useless… so I came up with my own tactic And *this strategy* has worked for me every. single. time. Meaning when I send this, the guy actually blocks *me* before I even block them. It fucking works but it’s wildly disturbing. ⚠️PLS READ: if there’s any good guys reading this & you *dont* send unsolicited dick pics to women, you have been EXTREMELY warned to STOP HERE & move along. You don’t deserve it. I’m serious. ⚠️ This is copied/pasted from my notes, the exact message I send that guarantees an immediate block and never to hear from them again<3 : You *WILL* think about your sweet mother/grandma’s vagina every time you try to masturbate for the next 6 months. When you’re in your room, on your bed with headphones in and browser ready for porn, it won’t matter. No matter how hard you try, you’ll think about your mother/grandmother entering your room naked and exposing their vaginas to you. You’ll think about the wrinkles, the smell, the gaping floppy hole itself. You’ll think about them watching you, whether in the room or from the after life (if dead). All of this will happen every time you try to pull ur lil squeaker out. It will be impossible to get hard. And in the chance you are almost able to reach climax, in this precise moment, you *WILL* think about your father or grandfather fucking you in the ass and climaxing with you. NEVER send an unsolicited dick pic ever again. You are the lowest of the low in society, the scum under my shoe. Goodnight!! Tell your family you love them!!💋 Again, my data/research comes from years of experience and sadly, this is the most effective action possible and may also stop them from disturbing future women. You’re welcome☺️💝


Holy shit. Not a guy. Have received unsolicited dick pics. This message is deffo at the top of the list of new and unique responses.


Yep, it’s a horror that mostly women are afflicted by. The reason though that I’ve seen it *so* much was bc my 2 guy friends in HS thought it would be funny to temporarily put my Snapchat username in the comments of a highly viewed video on pornhub. I was at practice so it was up for an hour or 2. Came back to HUNDREDS of requests. Changed username immediately but still get random pics to this day lol. This is the one message that I can tell *really* does the most damage. Is it fcked up that I came up with this? Yes. But it’s more fcked up that I *had to* in the first place …….Works though🤷🏻‍♀️


As a dude that has only ever sent pics when asked for them, I still think this is gonna cause me some trauma later. 12/10, hope to never ever read again


"can you zoom in?"


Sounds like a great way to get a zoomed in Dick pick


You should collect them and then respond with your collection.


“I thought you were a guy?”


Your mom lied when she said it was big


Send back a pic of a bigger, meatier dick and say "mine is bigger" to establish dominance


Forward it to their mom