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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1. I sold my exes property 2 years after the breakup.
2. It might make me an asshole because she cussed me out on facebook for everyone to see.
I literally included all this in my original post.
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NTA
I found my ex's grandma's silverware (like actual silver) and mailed it to him and his new wife. The new wife sent me a ranting FB message about beating me up. My ex called me a cunt and said I had hidden it from him. Like dude I gave you 3 months to move out and take your shit. This was 5 years later and you never asked me about it. Sorry I was nice.
Anyway, you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. At least you made money
She was super unstable and honestly if you meet him it wouldn't surprise you.
The last day we were together he yelled at this poor AT&T worker, to the point where she was crying, because he broke his phone and she couldn't fix it for him. I had to drag him out of the store and then he screamed at me for embarrassing him. We got home and I told him I was going to a friend's house until he calmed down so he punched a hole in the wall. So I told him I was done and walked out and never came back
The above comment was stolen from [this one](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up2fh0/aita_for_selling_stuff_that_belongs_to_my_ex/i8i8kpw/) elsewhere in this comment section.
It is probably not a coincidence; here is some more evidence against this user:
Plagiarized | Original
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[NTA. Change it. Sounds li...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/uosdoy/wibta_if_i_changed_my_name_despite_my_mothers/i8hl1zc/) | [NTA. Change it. Sounds l...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/uosdoy/wibta_if_i_changed_my_name_despite_my_mothers/i8gd8vu/)
[NTA….you should buy a mir...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up5fro/aita_for_sarcastically_asking_my_sister_if_she/i8jurr7/) | [NTA….you should buy a mir...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up5fro/aita_for_sarcastically_asking_my_sister_if_she/i8iskg6/)
[YWBTA if they used the mo...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up4o7q/wibta_if_i_reported_my_exfriend_to_gofundme_for/i8jurb2/) | [YWBTA if they used the mo...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up4o7q/wibta_if_i_reported_my_exfriend_to_gofundme_for/i8ioj52/)
[NTA! for the reason that...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up3jsk/aita_for_giving_my_brother_a_taste_of_his_own/i8juqky/) | [NTA! for the reason that...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up3jsk/aita_for_giving_my_brother_a_taste_of_his_own/i8ifs9u/)
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I gave my ex a week to move out and three months to make sure he had everything.
He left his Marvel film collection in the wardrobe after that. Since I already had my own set, that brought a pretty penny.
Sounds like a lovely couple. Would have sent a message back saying “Sorry it took so long to find. It was in a very well hidden box along with some Asian porn. I tossed the porn since no one uses VHS any longer”.
The above comment was stolen from [this one](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up2fh0/aita_for_selling_stuff_that_belongs_to_my_ex/i8i8q2h/) elsewhere in this comment section.
It is probably not a coincidence; here is some more evidence against this user:
Plagiarized | Original
-------- | -----------
[NTA your sister is the po...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up5fro/aita_for_sarcastically_asking_my_sister_if_she/i8jrpm6/) | [NTA your sister is the po...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up5fro/aita_for_sarcastically_asking_my_sister_if_she/i8iuu8j/)
[YTA because you don’t eve...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up4o7q/wibta_if_i_reported_my_exfriend_to_gofundme_for/i8jrn9a/) | [YTA because you don’t eve...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up4o7q/wibta_if_i_reported_my_exfriend_to_gofundme_for/i8in1ai/)
[NTA while you miscalculat...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up3jsk/aita_for_giving_my_brother_a_taste_of_his_own/i8jrow1/) | [NTA while you miscalculat...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/up3jsk/aita_for_giving_my_brother_a_taste_of_his_own/i8ifigw/)
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You’re nicer than me, I put my ex’s stuff in a trash bag (with a shit ton of glitter in it) and dropped it off on his parents front door. If I remember correctly i labeled it “for your cheating son”.
NTA - If you gave her plenty of warnings and asked her numerous times to remove her stuff, you have every right to get rid of it. If anything, give her the money (minus your hourly rate to get rid of all her stuff, minus the rent for keeping her stuff there for 2 years)
Reminds me of a time a friend of mine borrowed a pair of ski goggles for me and forgot to return them to me, sis I owed him storage? My response was I don’t think it’s more than the late fee on the rental return
NTA. 2 years was plenty of time for her to claim her items but she didn't. You also warned her beforehand and she didn't heed your warning, so it can be safely assumed that she didn't want the items. If she did, she would have claimed them while she still had the chance.
You are not a free storage facility. As long as you gave her opportunity and didn't place undue restrictions on her ability to pick the items up, you are in the clear. She was taking advantage of you. Might have been a good idea to say one last time-hey, pick your stuff up or I am selling it.
My friend went through this too. Although, way more drama involved. His gf of several years went to “visit” her fam in another state. She kept asking my friend for money and talking to him as if they were fine. This turned into a year long distance relationship. (All her clothes and belongings were still in his apartment -all over the place it was kinda gross, but he was too depressed to clean all her shit up) then one day she ghosted him. She popped up about 9ish months later- turned out she cheated on him and got pregnant (sadly, her baby died after birth). She had the audacity to say that ghosting him was how she “broke up with him” to “set him free” so she “didn’t actually cheat” like wut. Anyways, I boxed up all her belongings so he wasn’t surrounded but her messy shit 24-7. They have been sort of friends still because he still tries to take care of her. (The amount of drama in that relationship is insane, soooooo much omg)
Anyways, he held on to her stuff for almost another year, on top of all the time she’d already been gone/had a whole other life. He continuously asked her what she wanted to do with it and she never gave him an answer. Finally, he threw it all out. Out of the blue she asked about her stuff. When she found out he threw it away she acted so hurt and put out.
I think she just needed a reason to feel a vindicated, because she acted all self-righteous like “I can’t believe you got rid of [insert item] I just need some time away from you now” it’s all kinds of weird.
That is what I think your ex is doing too, for whatever reason. “How dare he” it’s just smoke and mirrors to me. She just wanted to look like the victim in front of everyone.
Also, I’m so sorry that was so long lol I’ve been counseling my friend for like 8 years now with his relationship with her and I guess I needed to vent too. No matter how much I hope he stops talking to her he never does. God, I could write a book off their relationship alone.
Edited to add: NTA
Do you need to end your relationship with your friend since it sounds very emotional draining? The fact that he still talks to her after everything is weird. Does he just like the drama?
It does get emotionally draining, for sure. I think I’m going to start distancing myself from those conversations. I know that it is far more difficult for him being in it, so I will engage when it seems like he really needs to vent about it, but I think I definitely need to make sure I stop investing more energy than I healthily have to give in repeated conversations.
I’m not sure if he is addicted to the drama as much as he just hasn’t experienced a relationship without drama before. She was/is his first serious relationship, and it’s been toxic from the beginning. I honestly do not think he has had a healthy relationship with most of the people in his life.
He does talk about how he feels like he has to “save” her, though. Sometimes, I think he it makes him feel better when people need him. It’s like he complains about helping her, but also seems like he feels more important because he does.
No and here's why. The relationship ended badly and she actually moved a few states away last year. I also have a new girlfriend who doesn't want me contacting exes. I didn't feel the need to contact her about this again. After the breakup, I did indeed tell her exactly what she left at my house and she said ok. She never picked it up so I sold it. I gave her a 2 year window and she didn't act on it. I didn't think I had to tell her twice if I'm honest.
Her time to collect her things would have been before the move. She clearly didn’t care about it. Consider the money you got from selling it the storage fee.
I should have blocked her, I agree with that. She wasn't my friend though. She got through from one of our mutual fb friends and that friend tagged me in the comment section of my exes post. Everyone is blocked now.
NTA. It depends on where you live, but after some period of time, it's legally assumed to be abandoned. I want to say your ex's things hanging around for two years (with reminders to pick them up) makes you perfectly within reason to sell/dump her stuff.
NTA. I tossed a lot of stuff and gave other stuff to charity shops after giving my ex bf warnings TWICE that I was going to do so. The only reason he got two warnings instead of one was I had to haul it all up from the basement and was hoping he'd do it himself.
Hahahahaha NTA
My ex and I had a horrible break up, I own the house but I couldn't be there another minute, and he left everything inside. My dad sold all of it and a year later ex tried to call my bestie looking for his stuff, like man, everything was discarded and another family is living there just don't go there and bother them, she hung up and blocked him.
They have plenty of time, if they don't get their stuff it's because it's not important or necessary.
NTA- you needed to sell the stuff to make up the storage fees. Also, what kind of AH ex admits to leaving shit at your house for two years and thinks, hey FB friends feel sorry for me that my ex finally sold my sh\*t AFTER 2 YRS.
Legally, it's your property to dispose of as you wish after six months. So, NTA. If she cared about it that much, she should have picked it up sometime in that two whole-ass years.
Nope. Which is why I thought it was strange that quite a few people joined with my ex on facebook to tell me i am an asshole. I had to verify that I am indeed not an asshole for this.
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We broke up 2 years ago. I told her to get her stuff out of my house. She didn't. 2 years later I decided to sell her crap to get it out of my house. I should have done it sooner but I moved on and forgot about it quickly after the breakup.
She found out through a mutual friend and cussed me out for it on Facebook for all to see. I don't believe im wrong here but I'm curious to see what you say.
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NTA. Not the best example cuz this sometimes happens at a desperation, but when people stop paying for storage units their stuff gets auctioned off. She treated your house like a storage facility, you acted like a storage facility and got rid of things you were not being paid to store
NTA I told my ex Baby Daddy to pick up his stuff in a week if he didn't it was going to the Goodwill he didn't so a week later it went to the Goodwill 😂
Normally when a roommate leaves their stuff behind legally they haven’t moved out. So either the property was abandoned or your ex owes you back rent…
NTA. Whatever your legal living arrangement was, your ex had ample time to come get her stuff if she wanted it.
If it had been a couple weeks or something you’d be TA but since it was 2 whole years
NTA.
It might have been slightly better to donate it. But at this point I really dont think it was hers anymore
nta and its has been 2 F'ING YEARS if she really wanted the stuff she would have either gotten it herself, sent a friend to get it for her or ask you to box it up and drop it off, she just wanted to pick a fight over something small
NTA, as long as you gave her a clear timeline to get her stuff out. Granted, you shouldn't have had to tell her, she should have requested that she be able to come pick up her possessions as soon as you broke up, but if you told her, she didn't come through, then her stuff is up for grabs.
NTA
It was abandoned.
She 100% cannot obligate you to take care of, move, and hold *her shit*.
You could have left it non the curb a few days/weeks after telling her to get it.
When you moved you could have left it behind.
It's yours. Not hers.
NTA. You wouldn’t be if it was 2 weeks after whatever deadline you gave her to get her things. But 2 years? No. A storage facility would have sold it by now, why shouldn’t you?
it’s been long enough imo, if she hasn’t said or asked abt it then that’s her bad. but you definitely could have asked her a second time as a final warning before selling everything.
NTA
NTA. In a lot of places, once someone is notified and they fail to retrieve it it is considered abandoned property after a certain time period. She was notified and didn't come get her shit. Her own fault and her loss.
NTA. Took my ex one year to pick up her junk from my house and took a court and a separation order to get it removed. Just be mindful of what the rules are in your local area in relation to abandoned belongings. There may be a process to go through allowing the other person a reasonable opportunity to collect their possessions. Although there is something to be said for possession of an item and ownership
NTA
I’m more shocked about the audacity she has for cursing you out. Seriously you left your crap for two years what did you expect, op being some free storage unit or something. Won’t lie I’m surprised you held on to her stuff for more than one year neither less two.
NTA: if you gave her the opportunity to come over and pick up her stuff and she didn't and didn't ask you to hold on to it to which you agreed then yeah. Two years is way too long to be holding on to someone else's cast offs. If any of it meant something to her she would have picked it up within the first week or two. Are you supposed to endless cart her stuff around with you? I probably would have dumped it after 3-6 months with no regrets.
The fact you are even asking if you were in the wrong after holding on to her shit for two long years shows you are a really nice guy. She was an idiot for letting you go. Forget about whatever she saying on Facebook. Not one person hearing you held on to her belongings for 2 yrs and she was too lazy to come get it, is going to think YTA. No way, you are definitely NTA!!
I moved out of a horrible relationship quickly. Forgot to grab the cat litter box. Ex tried to get me back. It didn't work as I had finally had enough of the lying and verbal abuse. He showed up and dropped off the admittedly used cat litter box (not my mail or anything else important that I left). The dummy forgot the fact that we still had a joint bank account that I told him to close and that he could keep MY money. Walked right to the ATM, took out $200, called and left a message that his stunt caused him $200 and that I would continue to take that amount each week until he closed the account. That felt so freeing. He played it off like he wasn't trying to be a jerk but man did he close that account quickly. Anyways, they both are the AH and their lives are probably full of crap due to their own actions. NTA, you were actually very nice and Karma will reward you someday. I know my life has been awesome in the years after being with my messed up ex.
NTA I would have gotten rid of it 2 years ago. She was obviously the AH then & is still an AH. Ignore her... or post the truth on Facebook so people hear the whole story.
NTA
Should have done it sooner, OP. Feels good, right?
TWO. YEARS.
If she didn't miss anything bad enough to reclaim it in TWO YEARS then it wasn't that 'valuable' to her.
Hahaha, NTA
NTA - I had a similar thing happen, unfortunately most of the ex's stuff was crap and the skip hire was a pretty penny. I was moving though and was not gonna take it with me!
NTA. She had time and you told her to get her stuff out 2years ago. If she didn't and hasn't contacted you about it then any state would consider that abandoned property and you can do what you wish with it.
NTA it was abandon property. she had 2 years to come and get the stuff and didn't. You are in the clear . Unless you said Hey you can store your crap here forever and I don't care no judge would side with her at all.
NTA. but this situation reminds me of my ex. He borrowed some stuff of mine when we were together. I asked for it back multiple times while together/after we broke up. Eventually I gave up. A year and a half later I just replaced what was missing. Then, out of the blue, about 6 years later he gets my new number from my sister and asks if I want my stuff back. By this time I've finished college, moved to another country and had been married 2 years. I told him I replaced the items years ago, so not to worry about it. I haven't heard from him since. So I feel like if she really cared she would have made attempts to get her things back/just replaced them anyway.
I may be a bit biased since I have my ex-husbands boat in my backyard and we’ve been divorced for two years. It’s an old wooden 1950’s John boat he refinished into something beautiful. But now it just sits and although it’s covered, it is deteriorating. He keeps saying he’ll come to get it but doesn’t. Moving across the country in three weeks. If he doesn’t get it by the time the house sale closes, it’s going to be in the front yard with a FREE sign on it. I don’t care how much it’s worth. It’s only a headache to me. So I definitely think you are NTA! Get rid of it!
I know! It has been over two years! I just keep asking and waiting and trying to be nice because I’m not an AH and it was a beautiful boat and could be again with a little work. But damn, I am actually moving and can’t leave it for the new homeowner… and he’s adamant that he doesn’t want it dropped off.
NTA
She’s either doing this to stick it to you or she wants an excuse to not let you go I reckon she has feelings for you or she’s trying to stick it to you but nonetheless you are not the AH in this that is too long to leave your stuff in someone’s home
An older generation Amazon fire stick and remote- $15 after selling it to a co-worker.
A nude Markiplier calender- $5 after giving it to my sister who insisted on paying me.
Some hoodies-$20 for 3 of them.
Some music CDs worth very little. Don't remember how much.
An old bong from our smoking days- $40.
She was told about the items. I had them in a box ready to go but then 2 years went by.
After 6 months, a normal person would consider stuff lost unless still in communication and actively trying to get it back. If she was actively trying to get it back, I could agree, but sounds like she abandoned it.
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NTA I found my ex's grandma's silverware (like actual silver) and mailed it to him and his new wife. The new wife sent me a ranting FB message about beating me up. My ex called me a cunt and said I had hidden it from him. Like dude I gave you 3 months to move out and take your shit. This was 5 years later and you never asked me about it. Sorry I was nice. Anyway, you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. At least you made money
What the hell? They were mad at you for returning it? I’d say that warrants a thank you, not a fuck you.
She was super unstable and honestly if you meet him it wouldn't surprise you. The last day we were together he yelled at this poor AT&T worker, to the point where she was crying, because he broke his phone and she couldn't fix it for him. I had to drag him out of the store and then he screamed at me for embarrassing him. We got home and I told him I was going to a friend's house until he calmed down so he punched a hole in the wall. So I told him I was done and walked out and never came back
Good for you, he sounds like an absolute nightmare.
I’m glad you got out of that relationship and removed yourself from an unsafe environment! Internet hugs
Ho-ly ***Shit***.
Happy for you sounds like you dodged a bullet with this charming guy…
I mean we were married for 8 years so....
I’m sure he had some redeeming qualities 😉 internet hugs for you :)
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Maybe a fork you? Sorry, will let myself out.
Especially when it's grandma's silverware. She didn't send an old dirty sock or anything.
I gave my ex a week to move out and three months to make sure he had everything. He left his Marvel film collection in the wardrobe after that. Since I already had my own set, that brought a pretty penny.
Sounds like a lovely couple. Would have sent a message back saying “Sorry it took so long to find. It was in a very well hidden box along with some Asian porn. I tossed the porn since no one uses VHS any longer”.
Noice
She sounds like a classy lady and he sounds like an upstanding gent. /s You were far nicer than I would have been; finders, keepers.
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NTA Two years? What were you supposed to do?
Exactly!
Sell ig
NTA. she's lucky you didn't send her a bill for storage.
Good point. Maybe I should have lol
It’s not too late 😉
Good luck with that
NTA, you’re not free storage. If she abandoned it that’s what she gets.
NTA. She had two years to get that stuff, and you told her to take it out of your house.
And she didn't miss it for two years, so it can't have been that important to her.
NTA. I think 2 years is sufficient time to make arrangements to reclaim stuff.
Thank you.
NTA - Two fucking YEARS? How long were you expected to hold onto it? That’s ridiculous.
Exactly. YEARS. If I wanted to be an asshole, I would have thrown it out 2 days after the breakup. She had enough time to get it.
You’re nicer than me, I put my ex’s stuff in a trash bag (with a shit ton of glitter in it) and dropped it off on his parents front door. If I remember correctly i labeled it “for your cheating son”.
> I put my ex’s stuff in a trash bag (with a shit ton of glitter in it) They'll enjoy that glitter for the rest of their lives. Good job
You obviously already know that you're not TA
NTA. lots of states actually have laws that would actually make it your property after X amount of time being abandoned.
NTA - If you gave her plenty of warnings and asked her numerous times to remove her stuff, you have every right to get rid of it. If anything, give her the money (minus your hourly rate to get rid of all her stuff, minus the rent for keeping her stuff there for 2 years)
Perhaps she should pay him, i mean storage is very expensive.
Reminds me of a time a friend of mine borrowed a pair of ski goggles for me and forgot to return them to me, sis I owed him storage? My response was I don’t think it’s more than the late fee on the rental return
Pulled him with an UNO reverse
NTA. A few months, maybe, but 2 years? Nope. Let whoever cuss you out, ultimately the ex is the one who was too dumb / lazy to get her stuff
I agree!
NTA. 2 years was plenty of time for her to claim her items but she didn't. You also warned her beforehand and she didn't heed your warning, so it can be safely assumed that she didn't want the items. If she did, she would have claimed them while she still had the chance.
NTA - She abandoned her property 2 years ago. Block her!!
Just did! That, and 6 of her friends too after ganging up on me. My family saw that nonsense.
How much was the stuff worth anyway? What kind of items are we talking here? NTA either way, just curious.
NTA, go watch Judge Judy, she abandoned it and is lucky you haven't charged her for storage.
You are not a free storage facility. As long as you gave her opportunity and didn't place undue restrictions on her ability to pick the items up, you are in the clear. She was taking advantage of you. Might have been a good idea to say one last time-hey, pick your stuff up or I am selling it.
So far only 1 YTA. That's fine with me!
It’s probably your ex or one of her friends.😉
My friend went through this too. Although, way more drama involved. His gf of several years went to “visit” her fam in another state. She kept asking my friend for money and talking to him as if they were fine. This turned into a year long distance relationship. (All her clothes and belongings were still in his apartment -all over the place it was kinda gross, but he was too depressed to clean all her shit up) then one day she ghosted him. She popped up about 9ish months later- turned out she cheated on him and got pregnant (sadly, her baby died after birth). She had the audacity to say that ghosting him was how she “broke up with him” to “set him free” so she “didn’t actually cheat” like wut. Anyways, I boxed up all her belongings so he wasn’t surrounded but her messy shit 24-7. They have been sort of friends still because he still tries to take care of her. (The amount of drama in that relationship is insane, soooooo much omg) Anyways, he held on to her stuff for almost another year, on top of all the time she’d already been gone/had a whole other life. He continuously asked her what she wanted to do with it and she never gave him an answer. Finally, he threw it all out. Out of the blue she asked about her stuff. When she found out he threw it away she acted so hurt and put out. I think she just needed a reason to feel a vindicated, because she acted all self-righteous like “I can’t believe you got rid of [insert item] I just need some time away from you now” it’s all kinds of weird. That is what I think your ex is doing too, for whatever reason. “How dare he” it’s just smoke and mirrors to me. She just wanted to look like the victim in front of everyone. Also, I’m so sorry that was so long lol I’ve been counseling my friend for like 8 years now with his relationship with her and I guess I needed to vent too. No matter how much I hope he stops talking to her he never does. God, I could write a book off their relationship alone. Edited to add: NTA
Do you need to end your relationship with your friend since it sounds very emotional draining? The fact that he still talks to her after everything is weird. Does he just like the drama?
It does get emotionally draining, for sure. I think I’m going to start distancing myself from those conversations. I know that it is far more difficult for him being in it, so I will engage when it seems like he really needs to vent about it, but I think I definitely need to make sure I stop investing more energy than I healthily have to give in repeated conversations. I’m not sure if he is addicted to the drama as much as he just hasn’t experienced a relationship without drama before. She was/is his first serious relationship, and it’s been toxic from the beginning. I honestly do not think he has had a healthy relationship with most of the people in his life. He does talk about how he feels like he has to “save” her, though. Sometimes, I think he it makes him feel better when people need him. It’s like he complains about helping her, but also seems like he feels more important because he does.
INFO: did you tell her that you were about to sell it and that if she still wnated it this was her last chance?
No and here's why. The relationship ended badly and she actually moved a few states away last year. I also have a new girlfriend who doesn't want me contacting exes. I didn't feel the need to contact her about this again. After the breakup, I did indeed tell her exactly what she left at my house and she said ok. She never picked it up so I sold it. I gave her a 2 year window and she didn't act on it. I didn't think I had to tell her twice if I'm honest.
Then NTA given the time frame
Her time to collect her things would have been before the move. She clearly didn’t care about it. Consider the money you got from selling it the storage fee.
🤚 Recovering hoarder. My kids tell me if I haven't used it in a year, pitch it.
Why is she still your friend on Facebook? Block that psycho. NTA.
I should have blocked her, I agree with that. She wasn't my friend though. She got through from one of our mutual fb friends and that friend tagged me in the comment section of my exes post. Everyone is blocked now.
You done good.
NTA after 2 years it's called abandoned property.
NTA. It depends on where you live, but after some period of time, it's legally assumed to be abandoned. I want to say your ex's things hanging around for two years (with reminders to pick them up) makes you perfectly within reason to sell/dump her stuff.
NTA. I tossed a lot of stuff and gave other stuff to charity shops after giving my ex bf warnings TWICE that I was going to do so. The only reason he got two warnings instead of one was I had to haul it all up from the basement and was hoping he'd do it himself.
NTA. Man, even storage places don't hold stuff for that long before auctioning it off.
Hahahahaha NTA My ex and I had a horrible break up, I own the house but I couldn't be there another minute, and he left everything inside. My dad sold all of it and a year later ex tried to call my bestie looking for his stuff, like man, everything was discarded and another family is living there just don't go there and bother them, she hung up and blocked him. They have plenty of time, if they don't get their stuff it's because it's not important or necessary.
NTA She should have kept up on her fees if she wanted to use you as a storage unit.
NTA
Fair. NTA.
NTA- you needed to sell the stuff to make up the storage fees. Also, what kind of AH ex admits to leaving shit at your house for two years and thinks, hey FB friends feel sorry for me that my ex finally sold my sh\*t AFTER 2 YRS.
Legally, it's your property to dispose of as you wish after six months. So, NTA. If she cared about it that much, she should have picked it up sometime in that two whole-ass years.
I definitely agree.
2 years? Sounds like abandoned property to me. 6 months would have been more than generous. She probably doesn’t even remember what she left lol. NTA
NTA because it’s been TWO WHOLE ROTATIONS AROUND THE SUN and she’s had TIME.
NTA Imagine the situation reversed. Would you complain on FB after leaving your shit in someone else’s house for 2 years?
Nope. Which is why I thought it was strange that quite a few people joined with my ex on facebook to tell me i am an asshole. I had to verify that I am indeed not an asshole for this.
I’m sure it was a carefully crafted she said.
NTA. Abandoned property at that point.
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Lmao NTA
NTA get that money 😂
NTA if she cared at all she would have gotten her shit.
Exactly. It's all just an excuse to embarrass me one last time.
If you gave her the chance to get her stuff, NTA.
Your home is not your ex’s free storage facility. NTA.
NTA Cuss her back and ask for storage fees
NTA for sealing but big Dumb for waiting that long ,2years seriously?
NTA - she had two years. And the stuff clearly wasn’t important enough for her to come get like right after you broke up.
NTA. Should have charged a storage fee.
NTA. If she really wanted it, she would have picked it up.
NTA. If she wanted it back then she should have picked it up 2 years ago, or at least between then and now. Clearly she didn’t want it back
NTA. Two years is a lot of time, I doubt she even remembers what was left at your house.
NTA. Not the best example cuz this sometimes happens at a desperation, but when people stop paying for storage units their stuff gets auctioned off. She treated your house like a storage facility, you acted like a storage facility and got rid of things you were not being paid to store
NTA I told my ex Baby Daddy to pick up his stuff in a week if he didn't it was going to the Goodwill he didn't so a week later it went to the Goodwill 😂
See, that's what I should have done!
NTA.
NTA people pay good money for long term storage, whatever they left they obviously didn’t care too much about it.
NTA
Normally when a roommate leaves their stuff behind legally they haven’t moved out. So either the property was abandoned or your ex owes you back rent… NTA. Whatever your legal living arrangement was, your ex had ample time to come get her stuff if she wanted it.
If it had been a couple weeks or something you’d be TA but since it was 2 whole years NTA. It might have been slightly better to donate it. But at this point I really dont think it was hers anymore
NTA. Legally maybe you were supposed to clearly define the terms like "I will remove in X days if not picked up." but NTA for sure.
30 days is the legal amount of time to keep stuff for people to get their items in most states. After that it's fair game to do with as you choose
NTA!!! Good thing she's an ex! Sounds like a nightmare
2 years is a long time. Her stuff was there so long you were basically a storage unit. NTA
NTA. After that much time, unclaimed items are forfeit.
NTA. 30 days, storage fees paid up or it's gone. Hope you re-couped the 2 yrs of unpaid storage fees.
nta and its has been 2 F'ING YEARS if she really wanted the stuff she would have either gotten it herself, sent a friend to get it for her or ask you to box it up and drop it off, she just wanted to pick a fight over something small
2 years? You’ve been more than patient. Flog the lot of it. NTA
NTA, as long as you gave her a clear timeline to get her stuff out. Granted, you shouldn't have had to tell her, she should have requested that she be able to come pick up her possessions as soon as you broke up, but if you told her, she didn't come through, then her stuff is up for grabs.
NTA, 6 months would have been generous. 2 years means she abandoned that stuff.
NTA. she could just be mad that you’re finally getting rid of her things. better than throwing them out anyway
Nta. That's on her
NTA
NTA. After two years that stuff now belongs to you. Sell it all or just throw it out.
NTA It was abandoned. She 100% cannot obligate you to take care of, move, and hold *her shit*. You could have left it non the curb a few days/weeks after telling her to get it. When you moved you could have left it behind. It's yours. Not hers.
NTA. But check with your state/local laws about abandoned property just to be sure she's not entitled to any of the money you made.
NTA. If she wanted it she would have gotten it within the first two months. Two years is more than enough time for her to get her shit.
NTA. I'd say 2 years is a reasonable standard of limitations.
NTA. She had 2 years. You could have gotten rid of it after a month. She abandoned it and expected you to deal with it. Which you did.
After 3 months of her not collecting and no communication I would consider that as forfeiting said goods.
NTA this is on her
NTA. You wouldn’t be if it was 2 weeks after whatever deadline you gave her to get her things. But 2 years? No. A storage facility would have sold it by now, why shouldn’t you?
NTA. You could have thrown it in the trash. If it was so important to her she had 2 years to pick it up. That is a long time.
it’s been long enough imo, if she hasn’t said or asked abt it then that’s her bad. but you definitely could have asked her a second time as a final warning before selling everything. NTA
NTA lol she didn't come for it for 2 years and NOW she cares about it? Nah she wanted a reason however small to try and make you a villain
NTA- she abandoned it for 2 years. It was taking up space. Mustn’t have been very important if she left it for years.
NTA. In a lot of places, once someone is notified and they fail to retrieve it it is considered abandoned property after a certain time period. She was notified and didn't come get her shit. Her own fault and her loss.
NTA. Took my ex one year to pick up her junk from my house and took a court and a separation order to get it removed. Just be mindful of what the rules are in your local area in relation to abandoned belongings. There may be a process to go through allowing the other person a reasonable opportunity to collect their possessions. Although there is something to be said for possession of an item and ownership
NTA just say you took the money as payment was owed after you stored her stuff for so long. In fact, there's still money outstanding.
Tell her she can come buy it back!!! That’s a lot cheaper than 2 years of storage fees! NTA
NTA I’m more shocked about the audacity she has for cursing you out. Seriously you left your crap for two years what did you expect, op being some free storage unit or something. Won’t lie I’m surprised you held on to her stuff for more than one year neither less two.
Abandoned NTA. She’s just looking for an excuse to rag on you
NTA: if you gave her the opportunity to come over and pick up her stuff and she didn't and didn't ask you to hold on to it to which you agreed then yeah. Two years is way too long to be holding on to someone else's cast offs. If any of it meant something to her she would have picked it up within the first week or two. Are you supposed to endless cart her stuff around with you? I probably would have dumped it after 3-6 months with no regrets. The fact you are even asking if you were in the wrong after holding on to her shit for two long years shows you are a really nice guy. She was an idiot for letting you go. Forget about whatever she saying on Facebook. Not one person hearing you held on to her belongings for 2 yrs and she was too lazy to come get it, is going to think YTA. No way, you are definitely NTA!!
While I think you're NTA, I believe you are legally liable
I moved out of a horrible relationship quickly. Forgot to grab the cat litter box. Ex tried to get me back. It didn't work as I had finally had enough of the lying and verbal abuse. He showed up and dropped off the admittedly used cat litter box (not my mail or anything else important that I left). The dummy forgot the fact that we still had a joint bank account that I told him to close and that he could keep MY money. Walked right to the ATM, took out $200, called and left a message that his stunt caused him $200 and that I would continue to take that amount each week until he closed the account. That felt so freeing. He played it off like he wasn't trying to be a jerk but man did he close that account quickly. Anyways, they both are the AH and their lives are probably full of crap due to their own actions. NTA, you were actually very nice and Karma will reward you someday. I know my life has been awesome in the years after being with my messed up ex.
NTA she has had 2 years to get her crap, i certainly wouldn't have been an exs personal free storage facility for that long
NTA I would have gotten rid of it 2 years ago. She was obviously the AH then & is still an AH. Ignore her... or post the truth on Facebook so people hear the whole story.
Sounds like she didn't really care about the stuff as much as she just wanted to make you look bad on fb. NTA
NTA More than enough time for her to get her crap. Period.
NTA Should have done it sooner, OP. Feels good, right? TWO. YEARS. If she didn't miss anything bad enough to reclaim it in TWO YEARS then it wasn't that 'valuable' to her. Hahaha, NTA
NTA- 2 years?!! I would’ve sold that stuff after two weeks with sufficient notice. Ex for a reason.
NTA - I had a similar thing happen, unfortunately most of the ex's stuff was crap and the skip hire was a pretty penny. I was moving though and was not gonna take it with me!
NTA. She had time and you told her to get her stuff out 2years ago. If she didn't and hasn't contacted you about it then any state would consider that abandoned property and you can do what you wish with it.
Yeah, abandoned property, NTA at all.
NTA it was abandon property. she had 2 years to come and get the stuff and didn't. You are in the clear . Unless you said Hey you can store your crap here forever and I don't care no judge would side with her at all.
Not the asshole If it was so important to her she should of got it soon but 2 years come on she’s just a petty person
Info: what did you post? What were the items? If you said things about the break up or the items were intimate you might be TA. Otherwise NTA.
NTA. but this situation reminds me of my ex. He borrowed some stuff of mine when we were together. I asked for it back multiple times while together/after we broke up. Eventually I gave up. A year and a half later I just replaced what was missing. Then, out of the blue, about 6 years later he gets my new number from my sister and asks if I want my stuff back. By this time I've finished college, moved to another country and had been married 2 years. I told him I replaced the items years ago, so not to worry about it. I haven't heard from him since. So I feel like if she really cared she would have made attempts to get her things back/just replaced them anyway.
NTA, two years is abandoned stuff that is cluttering your home
The legal and moral thing to do is keep it for a month or to give them a reasonable deadline. After tthat it is all on her. She's a putz! NTA
NTA what a douche canoe
I may be a bit biased since I have my ex-husbands boat in my backyard and we’ve been divorced for two years. It’s an old wooden 1950’s John boat he refinished into something beautiful. But now it just sits and although it’s covered, it is deteriorating. He keeps saying he’ll come to get it but doesn’t. Moving across the country in three weeks. If he doesn’t get it by the time the house sale closes, it’s going to be in the front yard with a FREE sign on it. I don’t care how much it’s worth. It’s only a headache to me. So I definitely think you are NTA! Get rid of it!
At least tell him you're gonna get rid of it for free if he doesn't.
I have… so many times. I even offered to drop it off at his house.
Then yeah that would be on him. I'd give him a final warning before it's done, but he should've gotten it by now.
I know! It has been over two years! I just keep asking and waiting and trying to be nice because I’m not an AH and it was a beautiful boat and could be again with a little work. But damn, I am actually moving and can’t leave it for the new homeowner… and he’s adamant that he doesn’t want it dropped off.
NTA. She had two years to get her stuff.
NTA. It’s been two years.
NTA She had 2 years to get her stuff if she wanted it. She obviously didn’t.
NTA She’s either doing this to stick it to you or she wants an excuse to not let you go I reckon she has feelings for you or she’s trying to stick it to you but nonetheless you are not the AH in this that is too long to leave your stuff in someone’s home
You warned her and she didn’t listen. Two years is a long time to get your crap and leave. NTA
INFO: what did you sell and how much did you get for it?
An older generation Amazon fire stick and remote- $15 after selling it to a co-worker. A nude Markiplier calender- $5 after giving it to my sister who insisted on paying me. Some hoodies-$20 for 3 of them. Some music CDs worth very little. Don't remember how much. An old bong from our smoking days- $40. She was told about the items. I had them in a box ready to go but then 2 years went by.
Ok then yeah, fuck that. Definitely NTA.
A nude markiplier calender.... the fuck did I just read ?
Yeah. It's a real thing. Weird as hell.
INFO: was anything unique, or especially valuable?
Nope. Just junk she forgot about. I didn't make much from the sale.
I would’ve given her another chance to pick up before I sold it. And I would have told her I was going to sell it. YTA
After 6 months, a normal person would consider stuff lost unless still in communication and actively trying to get it back. If she was actively trying to get it back, I could agree, but sounds like she abandoned it.
You would contact an abusive ex about things they left at your house 2 years after a nasty breakup?