By - kirliabat
Get a door stopper / jammer thingy. It goes under the door and wedges it shut. I'm sorry you're going through this. Is there any other trusted adult you can stay with? What about your father?
That's a great idea I'll call my dad thank you so much!! i will search for more about the door stoppers
In case they dont allow you to get/buy one you can make one easy from wood in school!
Im shure there are more videos on youtube on how to do it!
thank you a lot :)
That's serious shit.
You need a door lock honey.
Or you could balance a chair against the back of the door, with stuff on it so that it tips over and makes a big noise when your door is opened, so that at least you'll wake up and see who is coming in, and it may scare them into not doing it again if the whole house is woken up by someone opening your bedroom door in the middle of the night.
Can you hang something in between the door and your bed like a big sign saying "fuck off you sick peado and let me sleep"
WOAH i can actually do that and i will be getting a lock today my mom said i could!! thank sm for the advice ❤️
No OP don’t do this what you should do is leave the door open a bit and have a giant bucket of gorilla glue rigged to fall on him
Or a bucket of ice water would do. The guy is a pervert in need of a good dousing.
No ice water means he’ll keep his eyebrows
Hope it works out, and he gets the hint that he's wrong, putting the lock on will let him know that you know without having to be directly telling him.
again thank you so much ❤️
God damn, I am really sorry for that. Great work going to your mom. If she isn’t taking it seriously can you stay anywhere else, like a friends house?
Thank you I appreciate it❤️ and I can't my mom wouldn't let me. I really wish I could.
Idk maybe call out your brother?
my mom will be confronting him🙁
You can also put a flat wind chime on the your bedroom door so it will make a noise and wake you up if he does try to get in even when its locked
I have heavy bells on my front door. There is no way to open that door without making the bells ring. I would sit up in bed with my phone camera and snap his pics as he opens the door.
ooh okay i will 😊
and thank you ❤️
If he’s touching your phone, make sure you change your phone password to something he doesn’t know if you haven’t already. i would also hide my phone under the bed or somewhere else if he keeps touching it. good luck👍🏻
i will change my password and should i maybe take off my finger prints? thank you a lott❤️
Yeah put a pattern or a pass on it till this shit gets sorted out. Also, why not record this entire thing one night? Do you have a camera where you can hide in your room and record a night so you can see what he's doing?
okay thank you:D and no but ill be buying a camera soon!
First off, I want you to understand that none of this is your fault and your parents brushing this off is very concerning.
Above all, follow everyone's advice and get a door lock ASAP.
There are [apps](https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.sleepmonitor.aio) you can download for monitoring your sleep. They’re programmed to start recording whenever noise is made, I think this will be worth downloading for your own safety.
Even if not this, if you hear him coming then perhaps hide your phone and have it record everything.
Try and get some money so you can buy a hidden camera from Amazon or eBay.
You want something inconspicuous like an [alarm clock](https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/314029703891?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&mkrid=711-127632-2357-0&ssspo=2cixicvrrq2&sssrc=2349624&ssuid=0ZhbaLSbRsu&var=&widget_ver=artemis&media=COPY) with a motion sensor or a camera built into a [USB charger](https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/125344627280?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&mkrid=711-127632-2357-0&ssspo=HkgoxP4UQza&sssrc=2349624&ssuid=0ZhbaLSbRsu&var=&widget_ver=artemis&media=COPY).
I advise getting one that supports up to [64GB](https://amzn.eu/d/2V1hKv7) minimum so you can record long sessions.
If it ever gets to the point that you feel trapped, confide in a teacher, friends parent or someone you can trust. Even if you don’t want to go that far, message a trusted friend and tell them the situation. Log all the details whenever it happens.
Perhaps consider a safety emoji to alert your friend if you feel endangered.
Back up any evidence you have so your parents can’t delete it and brush it off if anything happens. Google Drive is ideal for this.
Microsoft Word or OpenOffice are good programs to use for logging reports. [Microsoft Word](https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.microsoft.office.word) can be downloaded onto android from the Play Store and is free to use.
If push comes to shove, go to the police.
Note: If anyone could be so kind as to recommend better options, please feel free.
thank you i think ill have enough money to buy something like that and ill be checking the apps out!!! ill be getting a lock today i've told my cousin's and best friend (who i know i can trust) ill be telling my dad when he gets out of work. logging everything that happens is a smart idea which i will be doing again thank you a lot❤️
1. Use the lock on your door religiously
2. Be sure to lock your window and close your curtains before bed
3. Talk to your school counselor about the feelings of being unsafe and the feelings that your mom is dismissing your fear and stress
4. Consider getting a small motion-activated security camera for your room when you are asleep and when you are not home. There are some you can get on Amazon for less than $40. Some will upload to internet servers and have apps for monitoring and control, others aren’t connected to the internet but save night-vision images/video locally on an SD card, and either option will provide evidence if anything weird is going on while you are asleep or absent, or they can provide some piece of mind if nothing is going on.
I know you feel like your mom isn’t taking you seriously, but she is taking you seriously enough to take real action by getting you a lock and confronting your brother. Those are the two most important things, and she is doing them, so she does care.
If you are still feeling that your fear is not being validated, the counselor can help you navigate that feeling and give you some tips to communicate your feelings and needs effectively with your mother
Here are a few low-cost camera options. Since the ones with apps upload their content to internet servers, you might want to only turn those on when you are absent or when you are clothed/doing things you don’t consider private. I would also buy an SD card for local storage if you can swing it
- TIFOR Trail Camera 24MP 1080P - H.264 HD Video Game Camera with Night Vision https://a.co/d/6iErCE5
- Deal of the day for Prime Members: Blink Mini – Compact indoor plug-in smart security camera https://a.co/d/36XAZXK
- Wyze Cam v3 Pet Camera Color Night Vision Motion & Sound Detection https://a.co/d/izhVqkP
- Ring Indoor Cam, Compact Plug-In HD security camera https://a.co/d/cYNMm04
- Wyze Cam v3 with Color Night Vision, https://a.co/d/bUDnCVC
woah that's really great advice i will be sure to follow all of these steps and thank you a lot for the resources seriously means a lot❤️
You’re welcome and good luck 🍀
Hi love, firstly, I want to say please please please start sleeping at normal times. It has soooo many health benefits, regularly going to sleep at 3/4am does more damage than good…..
Could it be possible that he just came to check on you when he heard the loud noise? Also sounds like he is sneaking out at weird hours.
thank you i will try to fix my sleep schedule and im not sure where he goes but the only person in the car was the driver
I don’t think we should quickly jump to the conclusion of pedophilic accusations, but the things he’s doing is definitely very suspect of something strange. Why would he make all that noise, tap your window, run the faucet, etc? It seems he’s not even trying to be sneaky. Not only that, he’s peaking into your room and then closing it. Call me crazy, but the phone calls, tapping your window, making noise, leaving in the middle of night, ect. seems like a set up for something. Which is still super concerning. 4th of July is when a lot of crimes happen, taking advantage of the noise and such. I recommend staying with your mom until July 5th.
Yeah, this is harassment no matter how you slice it. He *wants* OP to be uncomfortable. Maybe he thinks it’s funny, but whatever it is, it is sadistic, scary, and unacceptable
I’m sorry honey. You shouldn’t have to deal with this
do not worry i will stay strong!! ❤️
thank you for the advice ❤️
oh god really 😞 thank you i will stay with my mom until then i have work from 4am to 9am on the fourth of July and we'll probably go to the city that night
I would definitely take all of the precautions others have suggested, but I hope that this is more benign.
I wonder if the sound from your room freaked him out and he was investigating? If he heard something loud drop inside the house in your room and seemingly no one was awake, maybe he was checking to make sure no one was there? Peeking through your door to make sure no one was in your room or see if you were awake? Checking your window to make sure it wasn't broken/someone trying to get in?
I don't know, if it were me I would wake my sibling up and ask if they were okay and if they heard that noise.
Again, I would err on the side of caution, and definitely get a lock and keep him out, but I hope that it's explainable : ( but it seems creepy
wow i never thought about it that way but i got a lock today and installed it myself!
Has your mom confronted your brother yet? What did he say?
no she hasn't she's been very much avoiding the subject 😞
Have you talked to your dad yet?
It would help a lot to another readers if you could specify your age range.
All of that situation isn't something right and obviusly you had to tell your mom, but you should really consider to find extra help if nothing happens. Tell it to a teacher, call the police, tell it to a friend, tell it to someone of your family. Just make clear to everyone that your brother isn't having a normal behaviour agaisnt you and you feel super uncomfortable with that. So, if he keeps doing that, everyone who knows will try to help you in a way they can.
thank you so much:( i have told 3 people (who i trust) about the situation and they've all gave me advice on what i should do and i specified my age now !
That's great! Please, don't forget that every single country has child protection services to guarantee that that kind of situations aren't being normalized by the family and the person that is molesting or harassing someone. Don't ever have a feeling of guiltiness because you're acussing your brother, he's not respecting your privacy, your space and your integrity. Don't make it easy for him and try to ask help in every way you can to prevent him of doing something that's not gonna do well for you.
this makes me feel so much better thank you a lot 😞❤️
My only question is, why did he tap on your window? But anyway, I'm so so sorry this is happening. My biggest advice is, don't let anyone belittle your truth. And don't let this go. Your safety is important.
thank you for the advice:(❤️
You're very welcome. Don't let it go, even if others treat it as inconvenient. Even if it makes things uncomfortable for others. You deserve to feel and to be safe, and that's the most important factor here.
youre a sweet person!! ❤️
Oh thank you!! 🥰
Tbh it sounds like this guy is checking up if you're awake and then peeking into your room to make sure you're asleep coz he's sneaking out? Maybe thats the thing that's happening? Coz he looked back towards your room when he got into the car maybe as to make sure you didn't see him leave?
But what about the previous occasions?
And tapping on the window is not a way to check if someone is asleep; it’s a way to get their attention and wake them up
Maybe he tapped the window in order to see if she stirred or moved? And if she didn't move, he's safe? Idk this shit sketchy as hell fr. But I'm willing to bet it ties in with why he's sneaking out at night.
i really hope thats it? maybe 😞
Bucket of water balanced on the door frame!
i think i'll be able to get some thank you!
Kind of an odd family dynamic. Is he your half brother?
Also good move on the lock
we have different dads so yes half brother
I hope this doesn't paint a bad picture with you and immigrants. Depending on which country you're in, they could be risking deportation. Just a thought should things get worse.
So curious to hear the update on the mom
ill give an update if she even does confront him she hasnt even spoken a word to him today 🙁
yeah, definitely do keep us updated! This is really scary. I'm glad you got a lock now
Deja vu, anyone?
if you have sliding windows get a security bar that prevents your windows from being opened from the outside.
we do have a sliding door, i think we have one already (security bar) but still thank you!
You story is terrifyingly familiar. What im about to advise you might be hard to do but as someone who has had a similar experience this is what i can tell you.
1. Snip this shit at its bud by confronting ur brother urself tell him what u told us. This will scare him and not let him do it again.
2. AVOID any and all alone time with him as this will make him more confident and daring.
3. Lock 🔐 ur door wether u in the room or not U already did this so thats good
4. Dont accept anything from him for any reason even if he’s being nice this includes food, help and money and really just anything.
5. Dont let fear eat you up, you are not as powerless as you think. Dont let him intimidate you. Fake it till u make it by acting tough in-front of him. When he senses your intimidation it leaves him feeling powerful.
omg thank you so much!!! i will listen to your advice ^_^
Have there been any developments in the past few weeks?
Well I feel like I'm always hearing footsteps at night but no attempts into getting in my room. I haven't been able to sleep well ever since that happened. I also put a safety pin on the door knob so I know if it is twisted around while I asleep. I keep a little folded paper in the door so I know if someone has came in or opened the door. Also I've heard he has trouble sleeping at night and asked my mom for melatonin gummies.
the safety pin is smart! Your brother having trouble sleeping sounds like a reasonable explanation, but I would have very much been as unsettled by the whole thing as you are. I'm not sure if you already have, but if you can, I'd definitely get a lock for my door and lock it every night, even if it's just for yourself being able to feel safe.
So your older brother and sister are immigrants and you are not? How does that work?
she was mostly likely born in the country she lives in which, therefore, doesn’t make her an immigrant. however, her siblings were born in a different country to the one they are staying in.
still, i don’t understand how this question is relevant to the advice needed.
sorry i added it because since they are immigrants we took them in, since they had no where to go and they have been living with us ever since they have arrived to the U.S. sister (3-4years) brother (1-2years)
So your brother has been in your family 1-2 years, is acting strange and terrifying you, and your mother isn’t supporting or believing you? That’s awful.
yeah 😞 thank you for understanding
I think some things dont add up, could be because OP is young and not native English speaking, but I wanted to make sure.
there are several simple solutions to the things you think of as “not adding up”
Really? Please tell me, and while you are at it, why dont you also include all things that I think of as not adding up
why do you care so much about “things not adding up” when all this girl is looking for is advice from others? we don’t need to criticise whether her family are immigrants or not because that is irrelevant to the question at hand.
and, the things you think don’t add up consist of her brothers & sisters being immigrants; which has several solutions to why this could be. it isn’t that complicated. if you aren’t going to give thoughtful advice then i see no reason in asking these questions.
I am sorry, but this is the dumbest shit I heard today, I asked about one thing, there are a few more things that dont add up, but hey, be my guest acting like a wise ass.
>if you aren’t going to give thoughtful advice then i see no reason in asking these questions.
Where is your thoughtful advice?
i think it was personally not our place to ask more about the ins and outs of family even if it doesn’t make sense. i’m just reminding you to stay on topic, which is stated in the subreddit guidelines. rule no. 6, give OP the benefit of the doubt.
next time you try to say “this is the dumbest shit i heard today”, consider the rules of the sub.